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official daine visual archive
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@malachitemercury0
- my side account for fanfics: @anonyshadow -
mercury/mercy
they/she/he
audhd, queer + trans
fandoms ::
-pokemon
-gravity falls
-cuphead
-fnaf
-cult of the lamb
-animal crossing
-danganronpa
-vocaloid
-neptunia
-nintendo
-stardew valley
-genshin
-style savvy/model debut
-sanrio [kuromi, hangyodon, usahana, big challenges]
-good omens
what it's like dating lohen
ok.
so.
the thing we first need to get straight about lohen is that man has absolutely no sense of self preservation when it actually matters (probably pre story quest)
he'll walk into monster-infested ruins. Alone. Smiling. Gets stabbed. "...Huh." Pulls the spear out. Keeps fighting.
Medics: "CAN YOU STOP DOING THAT."
"Doing what?"
the 5th company was WORRIED for you when you started dating. because the lohen that THEY know once walked into a morning briefing like
Lohen: "Good news."
Entire company: "...No."
Lohen: "Today's exercise involves surprise attacks."
Entire company: "Please no."
Lohen: "Excellent enthusiasm."
you fell in love with the man who voluntarily exposed himself to concentrated dandelion pollen so he'd stop being allergic and now misses the side effects.
the confession was.. weird.
he tried to give you poisoned flowers and you never knew it was from him
eventually he had to outright say "i'm trying to court you"
When he asked you out, it was somehow even less romantic.
"You make surviving the day more enjoyable."
"...Is that your version of 'I like you?'"
"...Yes."
"...I'll take it."
bro is literally a golden retriever trapped inside a battlefield gremlin
The Knights expected him to become softer after dating. They were... technically correct. Around you. Everyone else? Still a menace.
Five minutes after lovingly holding your hand... He's hiding in a tree waiting to ambush Varka with a net.
Emotional range: 😊 You. 😈 Varka.
he's surprisingly clingy. not dramatically. just.. always touching you somehow. Holds your hand absentmindedly. Hooks a finger through your belt loop if you're walking through crowded streets. Rests his forehead against yours while thinking. Wraps an arm around your shoulders without realizing he's done it. If you're sitting beside him… Congratulations. You're now an armrest.
his love language is "i kept you alive. now kiss me"
brings you food because you forgot to eat.
repairs things before you notice they're broken.
walks on the side closest to traffic.
quietly checks exits every time you enter a building.
memorizes your routine.
Not because he doesn't trust you.
Because he wants to know where to find you if something goes wrong.
If you're injured?
He appears.
Nobody knows where he came from.
You barely finish saying:
"I think I scraped my—"
He's already wrapping the bandage.
absolutely SHAMELESS eye contact
He already studies everyone.
His partner?
Even more.
You look up.
He's looking at you.
"...What?"
"Nothing."
"...Then why are you staring?"
"You smiled."
"..."
"...I wanted to see it again."
He says things like this with complete sincerity. Then goes back to casually sharpening a spear.
he's weirdly domestic. he loves helping with chores and claims it's "efficient"
Ends up making everything into a competition.
"Whoever folds laundry slower washes dishes."
"...Why?"
"Motivation."
Cooking together?
He follows recipes...
Exactly once.
Then starts experimenting.
"...Lohen."
"What?"
"...Why is there Jueyun Chilis from Liyue in the pancakes?"
"...Curiosity."
He trusts you.
Completely.
If you say: "I've got this."
He believes you.
Doesn't jump in unless you actually need help.
But if someone genuinely threatens you?
The smile disappears.
Immediately.
Even the other Knights suddenly become interested in something else.
He doesn't realize half the things he does are romantic.
Casually tucks your hair behind your ear while talking.
Brings you flowers because "they reminded me of your eyes."
Falls asleep with his hand still holding yours.
Remembers every tiny thing you casually mention.
Then acts confused when everyone calls him smooth.
"I just... paid attention."
you eventually learn how ot be immune to his chaos
Everyone else: "WHERE DID LOHEN GO?!"
You: "...Ceiling."
Everyone: "..."
Lohen, upside down in the rafters: "...How'd you know?"
You: "You always hide there."
Lohen: "that's hot."
the 5th comany ships it so hard
his gifts are concerningly thoughtful
Normal people buy jewelry.
Lohen buys:
reinforced gloves
custom daggers
emergency medical kits
waterproof cloaks
specialized camping equipment
Then one day...
He quietly hands you a tiny carved wooden animal.
"...You made this?"
"Mhm."
"...When?"
"Couldn't sleep."
It's a perfect little carving.
You treasure it forever.
He pretends not to notice.
his pain tolerance is offensive. you asked him to rate his pain. he says 3. his arm is currently broken btw.
lohen usually sleeps like someone who's spent years in the field.
Very lightly.
One weird noise?
Eyes open immediately.
But if you're sleeping against him...
He relaxes.
More deeply than anyone has ever seen.
The Fifth Company notices he actually looks rested now.
One knight whispers:
"...They're good for him."
Another whispers back:
"...Don't tell him that."
varka's favorite hobby is watching you two be accidentally romantic in public.
lohen doesn't always say "i love you constantly". he says it. just differently.
"Tell me when you get back."
"Eat before you leave."
"I've already sharpened your weapon."
"Walk behind me here."
"Take my coat."
"You're tired."
And, perhaps his favorite:
"I've got you."
Matter-of-fact.
Completely unquestionable.
Because if Lohen says he's got you...
Then as far as he's concerned, the whole world would have to get through him first.
--
pls help me i'm falling down such a big rabbit hole for this man HAHAH GET IT GET IT RABBIT BECAUSE HIS CONSTELLATION IS
ok nvm.
Little birthday tea party 🫖
some vocaloid prints i made for AN 🩵🩷💛
some vocaloid prints i made for AN 🩵🩷💛
Lady in drive through had a bearded dragon sitting on her boobs and she held it up and let me pet it. killing myself canceled
art is not my strong suit but this is my best recreation of what i saw when i opened the window. i have to emphasize that she was supermodel levels of gorgeous
Yeah neopronouns arent a new fangled concept gen z came up with btw
never let the fact that you were born a girl stop you from being the gayest man alive
Imagine constantly dehumanizing neurodivergent people and then being surprised when they start to identify with something non human
your life is not an optimization problem
as in you'll never achieve the perfect daily routine, sleep schedule, coping mechanisms, mannerisms, fashion sense etc. even after years and years of healing and improvement and self-discovery. you will never be so good at life that you manage to utilize every waking moment. its great to be productive and all but sometimes you'll suck ass. sometimes you'll take eight hours to be done with a twenty minute job. you'll prioritize the wrong thing. you'll sleep for 12 hrs just to avoid being awake. you'll relapse. and you'll relapse again. you'll forget to turn in the assignment. you'll order too little food. life is far too large and complex for you to even experience it completely, much less try to make sense of and control it. you can't. please give up on that and be at peace with the hours you lose. they are not separate from your life.
Derealization Signs & Autism
Derealization is always something that confused us a lot. We were always seemingly unaware when it happened since we thought it was normal, but mostly because we only say people constantly describing it in the same way: "It's like the world is not real."
But, because we are autistic, this was not the way we needed to hear it, so we brushed it off as something we didn't do.
So, here are some signs that you are derealizing written in ways that would have helped us out better:
You know it's real and you feel connected to your body, but the world looks foggy, like you're looking through glass.
Objects look normal but do not feel "right" in some way.
Colors feel too sharp or dull.
Sounds are different in some way (i.e., too loud, muffled, disorienting, echo, etc).
Touch feels delayed, or like you are feeling things through gloves.
The world feels unfamiliar, like you're in a deja vu state instead of in a place you are in a lot.
Lights feel unfamiliar (I.e., too bright, or dull in some way).
Emotional reactions can be delayed, even when you are happy, but it is as if your reaction arrives late.
Time feels different, like it's too slow or too fast.
Also, keep in mind, some of these could be summed up to sensory problems, but derealization is not a sensory issue. Instead of feeling overwhelmed or underwhelmed by sensory things, you feel disconnected from them.
You should also keep in mind that autistic brains like to try and solve the experiences they are having, but as ironic as it is, checking your symptoms and scanning yourself mentally can keep you in a state of derealization longer, so be careful!
Derealization is a protective response from your nervous system. Going through this is not a bad thing, it does not make you a failure and you are not broken.
I hope this helped someone :)
Pre-menstrual depression is always depicted as like "He He! I had a box of icecream bars and cried while watching the Titanic!" But in reality, it's more like, "I'm standing the edge of an abyss. There is nothing good inside of me, I'm filled with rage and desperation."
It's crazy that being told how to deal with that is never a part of anyone's menstrual sex education.
This has already been said in the notes, but if PMS causes extreme depression and even suicidal ideation, that is in fact something that most people do not experience and it can be treated
Like for the majority it really is "oh i'm hungrier and moodier than usual"
^this should be a part of sex education so the point still stands
I went to my doctor after I was walking to work one morning and saw a bus coming and actually took a step to throw myself in front of it before I pulled myself together. Later that day I started bleeding and was literally like someone flipped a switch and I didn't feel suicidal anymore. Which made me feel like I was loosing my mind because who goes from 'I want to throw myself in front of a bus' to 'I'm perfectly fine' just like that? I did some research, I went to the doctor and described my feelings, he looked me in the eye and gently asked what I thought it was, I said I'd read about PMDD and I thought it might be that, he said 'I think so too' and wrote a prescription.
If, before you get your period, you feel furiously angry, suicidal, irritated by every tiny thing to the point you want to murder someone, stuck in a black hole you'll never escape from. If you are experiencing extreme emotions for what seems like no good reason, especially if you get your period and those extreme emotions just go away. You're probably not just PMSing , you may have PMS's feral big sister PMDD and it's treatable.
Also this is something that can develop as you get older. So if you used to get normal PMS but what I wrote above sounds more like your norm now then don't just write it off as regular PMS.
Derealization Signs & Autism
Derealization is always something that confused us a lot. We were always seemingly unaware when it happened since we thought it was normal, but mostly because we only say people constantly describing it in the same way: "It's like the world is not real."
But, because we are autistic, this was not the way we needed to hear it, so we brushed it off as something we didn't do.
So, here are some signs that you are derealizing written in ways that would have helped us out better:
You know it's real and you feel connected to your body, but the world looks foggy, like you're looking through glass.
Objects look normal but do not feel "right" in some way.
Colors feel too sharp or dull.
Sounds are different in some way (i.e., too loud, muffled, disorienting, echo, etc).
Touch feels delayed, or like you are feeling things through gloves.
The world feels unfamiliar, like you're in a deja vu state instead of in a place you are in a lot.
Lights feel unfamiliar (I.e., too bright, or dull in some way).
Emotional reactions can be delayed, even when you are happy, but it is as if your reaction arrives late.
Time feels different, like it's too slow or too fast.
Also, keep in mind, some of these could be summed up to sensory problems, but derealization is not a sensory issue. Instead of feeling overwhelmed or underwhelmed by sensory things, you feel disconnected from them.
You should also keep in mind that autistic brains like to try and solve the experiences they are having, but as ironic as it is, checking your symptoms and scanning yourself mentally can keep you in a state of derealization longer, so be careful!
Derealization is a protective response from your nervous system. Going through this is not a bad thing, it does not make you a failure and you are not broken.
I hope this helped someone :)
I'm done just being a spectator-I WANT TO BE PART OF THE FANDOM!
teto!!!
i posted this on bluesky on teto day and it did really well so i hope tumblr enjoys it just as much too
a comic about friendship
another comic about friendship
the first one is here
