I might be not Rangga enough to spell some beautiful words for adoring Cinta. I might just be too Sherina to a Saddam, controlling here and there like a bossy annoying bi*tch. But I guess you know, I'll have million parallel lives more than Sore had for Jo, just to show you how much you mean to me, and slap you in your face whenever you became such an idiot.
I used to be so good with words, but they probably right; people start losing their poetic souls when things are safe and steady. But you know, even in my loud and clear words asking you to close any doors you opened, you still didnt listen. Then why would I need to use pretty words anyway 😒
But at least now, let me try.
You know, when a big ship cross over the sea, the waves are running in different ways to finally come back beautifully near the ship all over again. I was that big ship to your (probably 😏) serene but wavy life. I am exactly what you are not, I do exactly what you didnt. You have all the rights to run everywhere but I know, you'll always be near, and beautiful.
I hate arguing but I'll shoot my best ones to state every disagreements we have with that sleepy eyes and tired voices. We could spend more hours discussing silly lines a youtuber said in a video, or planning any strategies to take down a regime, while listening to that chonky cat snoring or that tiny orange firecrackers cat trying to climb the curtain.
You still are the nicest reasons I stay awake late and sleep easy, more than any chamomile tea or magnesium pills can do.
I'm glad you're the wave that crushes back behind the big ferry of my life.
Merayakan tahun kesekian bersama
I feed you my lunchbox even since I was a stinky messed up teenager, and now I'm not that stinky but still messed up, and still making sure that you dont have your stomach empty, eventhough I hate your picky behaviour when I already am too hungry to have options.
But little did I know, whenever you're not around, I pick my lunch in your way. Protein this, protein that, veggies this, veggies that.
I thought I was doing anything your way because I missed you, or because I want the feeling of being with you all the time, but in fact; I did that because I simply changed, in much better way, since you're around.
I maybe now become the small little ship a fisherman rides to catch fishes, moving slow with the waves, not against the waves.
You know, I actually no longer care about whatever form you want to change into. If tomorrow I woken up and you're a butterfly, I'd build a garden out of nowhere so you can fly and try every flowers without anyone trying to cacth or stand in your way. If tomorrow I met you again and you're a giant fckin stone, I'll sit on the hill with you every night, enjoying the views while telling you my day (and you cant interrupt me yay).
Orang sepertimu dan varian macam aku
I thank myself I had spent time watching TBBT, because Amy there told Amy here about how to handle a Sheldon. Oh God you're just THAT kind of Sheldon, my kind of Sheldon. No directors would ever think to make a story about two people as much different as us. We're such a perfect antonym, a white to a black, a deep dark night to a sunny sweaty daylight.
I did my trips on group with strangers, I travel here and there with some uncomfortable transportations and strict itinerary. You hate strangers and you hate sweating, I even had to be angry first to wake you you up for a breakfast in a hotel. But I always wait for the next Nyepi trip, the best kind of trip we both enjoy.
And just like the other things that put us so much different, we always find a way. If you're too tired to find one, I'll do. Just sit and wait. And pay.
Ternyata unik, meski berisik
Tapi dari segala sisi, kita menarik
As the big big ships with various kind of noises, smells, visuals, movements, I somehow envy your kind of ocean. Same noise and smells everywhere, maybe sometimes one or two groups of dolphins jump around, or maybe one or two plastics are floating around to make your life a bit of a color.
But I know, you move higher when I am around, and I move faster when you're around. We might not be made perfect for each other forever, but I want to walk side by side with you as long as the time let us to be.
I dont want you to be perfect. I am nowhere near perfect for you, but I try my best to not be your worse. I dont need forever with you. I have no plan to live long, but I try my best to seize the day, as if tomorrow never comes.
Kita jangan jadi tua dan membosankan
Selamanya, janjinya menyenangkan, oh
Years later, you could be nominated in winning a nobel or other geek shits I dont understand. I won't ask for a fame or being noticed in one frame with you, hell no. I just want you to have a place to come back, to be a clueless empty headed human even for a slight minute, so you're charged enough to finally be the man of the game.
I never get tired to remind you this;
you are allowed to be tired, to take a rest, to chill around in between that ambitious asshole behaviour. Go dream big, achive bigger, having piles of new to-do-list everyday, but please breathe. Fly high, but take some times to ground.
And there you'll find me waiting. With new movies or series I put in my watchlist, or new songs I listened recently, or good foods nearby, or nice place to do a short staycation, or some fun concerts and shows to watch.
Or just a long and silent hug to snuggle all day.
Whatever and whenever we are going to be, we'll make sure we'll have enough fun.
Kalau pun tua, terkadang menyebalkan
Tapi janjinya, selamanya menyenangkan, oh
As long as you're staying, I count that as forever. I have no plan to promise anything, because I'm bad at remembering.
Happy birthday, you wavy ocean. Congratulation, you're stuck with me, again.
Selat Peleng, November 2025.
vaporwave
stormborns
turnnoffyourmind
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