Doctor Pastel

[treecitysessions]

Might watch America’s Next Top Model season 1 just for this queen bc LMFAOOOOO

[aorish-deactivated20251222]

[adreamoftimeladypals]

@24-7fandombrain

[princecroutons]

imagine you're some guy and you're going through the woods one day and you stumble upon a house and the people who live there just give you free food and eventually let you inside and it's like nothing you've ever seen before and the people are so nice and loving towards you and then one day they decide to never let you leave again, steal your balls, and give you a stupid fucking hair cut

[princecroutons]

my name is croutons and this is my story

[coffincoitus]

a scene must be included PRIOR to sex where the characters READ their birth certificates OUT LOUD so the reader will know they were born on the SAME DATE to avoid any disgusting AGE GAPS

[camille-lachenille]

[homunculus-argument]

Shitty parents will guilt their kids about how much they have to suffer to put a roof over their head, like having kids was the only reason they had to grudgingly give up on a lifelong dream of being homeless.

[homunculus-argument]

If you're having a private phone conversation with the phone off your ear, no headphones, and the speaker on in public, that's a public conversation now. That's an open invite, and I'm going to chime in if I have an opinion. This is now OUR disagreement about your boyfriend's spending habits.

[fer3112]

[byjove]

“my teenage child is so selfish” is an interesting thing I only see online moms say about their daughters. I’ve never seen one say it about their son. I think it’s because daughters enter the teenage years and begin developing critical thinking skills and independence and it enrages these parents who were using their kids as their own little therapists and unpaid domestic laborers.

[homunculus-argument]

I have the opposite of what the catholics have going on. I think that if I'm irredeemably wretched and imperfect, that's not my problem, and it's god and my parents who should be begging for forgiveness about that. Why would I be ashamed of being their creation, they should be ashamed of creating me.

[crippled-peeper]

every single school teacher should get paid $300,000 a year minimum and ICE agents should all die simultaneously in agony. this is my congressional budget plan

[actually-a-bread-loaf]

And none of the supplies they use for classrooms comes out of that $300,000, that’s a separate budget line

[homunculus-argument]

Fun fact: you can avoid midlife crisis by literally simply just skipping it. Straight-up just skip being middle-aged. Once I turned 30 and aged out of the "young adult" bracket, I skipped straight into being a weird little old man. Record youngest bizarre old geezer in generations. Now if I'm lucky and play my cards right, I've got like 80 or 90 years of being a weird lttle old man left in me. If I manage to do a hundred, I'm going to start telling people that the secret to living to 130 is that I ate an entire pine cone every single day.

That, or that I can't die because heaven isn't taking me and the devil owes me money so he's avoiding me.

[silverpolish]

aquarium outfit inspo

[woolieshubris]

i loved the vision so i thought id bring it to fruition.

[cikero]

I have been quoting this all morning while muted in a teams meeting

[anxietyproblem]

[homunculus-argument]

There's people who have a religion, and there's Religious People. The first type is just normal people who happen to have a foundational structure they like to have their world built upon. The latter type are the kind that make me want to lean in and say "look, I would not even want to get into the kind of Heaven that would let you in."

[liberalsarecool]

Domestic extremists?

Love how the party who whines about unelected bureaucrats and judges having too much power let this human buttplug run the White House.

[thememedaddy]

[mariacallous]