Organized Chaos

Megan. She/Her. 29.

[legityoots]

If heteroromantic asexual students aren’t making puns about straight A’s I don’t know what to do with my life

[wontonsoupinthemorning-deactiva]

message to all bitches

please survive

[nosleepforaiba-deactivated20251]

OP being deactivated is like a dying war general sending out her one final message to her loyal battalion before succumbing to her numerous wounds

[redbelles]

Your Honor, Ms. Vito’s expertise is in general automotive knowledge. It is in this area that her testimony will be applicable. Now if Mr. Trotter wishes to voir dire the witness as to the extent of her expertise in this area, I’m sure he’s gonna be more than satisfied.

MY COUSIN VINNY (1992) dir. Jonathan Lynn

[thememedaddy]

[disgruntled-foreign-patriarch]

Hence the invention of the Porch

[pillarofawesome]

[pomrania]

“This reads like fanfiction (it feels like it was written by a preteen, and most of such things posted publicly are fanfic)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (it has a focus on character and relationships, like the style of a lot of modern fanfic)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (it keeps referencing people and events with the assumption that the audience is already familiar with them, like how fanfic doesn’t need to rehash the source material)”

[pomrania]

Some further suggestions from the notes:

“This reads like fanfiction (it’s a love story for the ages as long as you can overlook that the author keeps misspelling ‘you're’)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (you can tell the author was having a blast writing this and now so do you reading it)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (the author is clearly info-dumping about a very niche hobby of theirs that they’re passionate about)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (the characters keep getting put in increasingly weirder situations which you’d normally only find in fanfic)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (the author felt the need to rehash the characters from when they were first introduced instead of after several years’ worth of character growth)” vs “This reads like fanfiction (it feels like it had no editor)”

[eosofspades]

i didn't have "i'm broken" teenage asexual angst i had "i'm literally being the only reasonable one about this concept and the rest of you are behaving like fucking freaks" perception issues

[fierceawakening]

Is it okay to be allo and yet find this deeply relatable?

All my friends: BOOOOOOOOYS 💜💜💜💜💜❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥👀👀👀👀

Me: I mean, they’ve always existed.

Friends: You don’t want to immediately pounce on them?

Me: There are a couple I can think of who pouncing on sounds nice. But you sound enamored of all of them, and I am confused.

Friends: So you like girls?

Me: …also yes, but I’m not sure that’s the disconnect I’m having.

[appendingfic]

people on tv: *cannot pass up a single opportunity to have sex with a sexy new person*

me: ...i do not think it is all that hard not to have sex with someone

[the-haiku-bot]

me: …i do not think

it is all that hard not to

have sex with someone

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[segel-sudeikis]

[wyrddragon]

You telling me that Jack Black would not be 1000% down to be kidnapped by the muppets for a shenanigan, or possible a hijink?

[lenacraft]

Mr. The Frog still sends me more than “we all agreed a celebrity is not a people”

[flightsofwonder]

being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit

[flightsofwonder]

why does this have 85K notes

[randomslasher]

because we reblogged it instead of cleaning our [x]

[syn4k]

rule #1 of the world is that love is stored in the kitty cat

[syn4k]

my apologies to puppy dogs everywhere

rule #1 of the world, fixed: love is stored in the Creature

[syn4k]

rule #2 of the world is that biting is also stored in the creature

[syn4k]

rule #3 is never talk to the police

[staff]

if you fuckers do the skeleton war shit again this year we’re deleting the website for real

[folkmetaltransfag]

en garde motherfuckers

[booksinthelakes]

@prudencegoodewitch on instagram

Literally would watch this on repeat.

Like daily. Hourly. EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY DAY.

[homunculus-argument]

I don't know whether the story about tibetan spaniels and tibetan mastiffs working together is true or not, but I find it way too fucking funny. Like imagine being a burglar who's broken into a monastery to do burglarly things, and then you hear a noise and you're like "oh shit I'm caught", but then you turn to look and it's just this tiny dog who looks at you with mild disgust and wanders off.

So you sigh in relief and continue with your robbery before you hear another noise, and immediately become aware of three things: The little dog came back with a friend, the new buddy is the size of one metric Fuck You, and you are about to find out which afterlife is real.

[salem-lunaris]

Adding this for people who don't know these breeds

Tibetan spaniel

Tibetan mastiff

[thesnadger]

Demons and monsters that torture people because they feed on human suffering are so dumb. People are suffering everywhere my guy go literally any place and take a deep whiff.

[thesnadger]

Monster that feeds on suffering becomes a professional caretaker for people with chronic pain and terminal illnesses. They can't change the fact that these people are suffering, but they help a bit and in the meantime they're fat and happy off that Sweet Sweet ambient pain in the air.

Two towns over there's a demon lord trying to get their cult to abduct people for torture, but they keep getting stopped by heroes and the like, so they're barely scraping by. Meanwhile Belogarth the Registered PCA is chowing down on back pain, medication side effects and looming mortality for eight hours a day and has become the most powerful demon on earth without realizing it.

[thesnadger]

"But don't their clients feel weird knowing that they're feeding off their suffering?" No they think it's hilarious and they're real shits about it.

[bladeangelx]

Finally a medical professional who believes that they are in pain. Because the fucker is actively chowing down on your agony. Not only am I going to get treated by them I'm going to invite all of my chronically ill friends to come as well.

[tachvintlogic]

Turns out if you treat the pain then the humans will bring you more humans who are suffering. It's like a restaurant where the waiter is so impressed by your ability to eat food they're giving you more on the house

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

They say things like "well, it's a real feast day for Belogarth today!" and "if my meds are held up at customs again I'm gonna put Belogarth in a food coma" and Belogarth is the one feeling weird about it

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

chekov’s cat: if you see a cat, it will probably be relevant later.

schroedinger’s gun: there’s no way to know if a gun is loaded or not until you physically inspect and check it yourself, so it’s safest to assume all guns are loaded.

[mariacallous]

#these are both excellent rules to live by#like#just in general

[donutdrawsthings]

IMPORTANT!

It’s the no-internet dinosaur’s birthday!!

Turn off your internet! He has a hat!!

[donutdrawsthings]

[jaimebeazley-blog]

SOMEONE PLEASE PUT A DATE ON THIS POST! I HAVE TO KNOW WHEN!

[fagdykefrank]

Its Sept 24

[lostglassguitars]

!!! Happy Birthday, no-internet dinosaur!!

[foundfamilynonsense]

Me, eleven, reading Percy Jackson: this is changing me at a foundational level.

Me, 22, watching the Percy Jackson trailer: this is changing me at a foundational level.

[imaginarycircus]

Remember calming cat? Remember when tumblr was this color? If you don’t that’s fine. I just feel old and alone.

[should-be-sleeping]

You’re never alone. There is always calming cat.