💧 @mehkardboard - Tumblr Blog

jennybystudiokillers-remade-dea

anyone else a gay with no memory

fattrender-deactivated20200226

i cant remember but i think so

jtrocks9

QUALITY JOURNALISM LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

jusky

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

*walks into five guys*

*counts number of people behind the counter*

HEY WHAT THE FUCK

kisskissfuckshitup

kids are fuckin wild dude,,,

i walked out of my apartment this morning and a five year old kid was playing outside and immediately he pointed at my aparment and was like “some chinese people used to live there. now someone else does”

and i was like… you mean that one? and pointed at my apartment, the one i literally just walked out of

and he was like “yeah”

and i was like……….. yeah…

kisskissfuckshitup

the other day I was coming back from work and as I’m walking up to my apartment, he runs up to me with two fistfuls of grass and yells DON’T STEP ON THIS GRASS IT’S FOR THE BUNNIES and drops it in the middle of the sidewalk and i’m just like okay!! :D

kisskissfuckshitup

this morning I left for work and I heard a tapping noise, so I looked up and he was in the second floor window waving goodbye

kisskissfuckshitup

today I was walking to my door and he ran up to me and yelled DID YOU KNOW SOMEONE IS COMING and i was like WHOA NO WHO’S COMING

and he tells the girl beside him YOU TELL HIM so she tells me “there’s a guide coming! and he’s invisible!” and ofc i’m like WHOA THAT’S SO COOL and the boy tells me that he’s arriving by helicopter. and the helicopter is also invisible and you can’t hear it either! so I ask why he’s coming and they tell me it’s because it’s his birthday and he’ll be here at exactly 6:00

they’re gonna ring my doorbell at 6 so I can tell the invisible man in the invisible helicopter happy birthday before he flies away

kisskissfuckshitup

so i said happy birthday to him and they showed me his invisible helicopter and then informed me that I misheard them and that the invisible man was, in fact, God

kisskissfuckshitup

okay so TODAY i came home from work and he came up to me and was like “i rang your doorbell earlier” and so I told him I wasn’t home and asked what he needed me for and he was like

“i had a question”

so I was like alright what was your question

and he goes “do you have a kitchen?” and I was like… uhh yeah I’ve got a kitchen

and he was like okay and walked away

petzel

as a young child i lacked the comprehension for an episode of veggie tales so for three years of my life my vision of god was this. god appeared to me in the form of frankencelery.