Post-modern Simulacra

[dragon-in-a-fez]

one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"

the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.

[thecryptkeeper]

i know the way people talk about their pets now is probably how we’ve been doing it for all of history. a cat owner in ancient rome saw their cat lounging on the dining pillows and commented “he thinks himself to be the senator claudius 🤣”

[b0nkcreat]

eyes emoji was the perfect invention for nosy people. like 👀 whats going on over here 👀👀 i just wanna know #LetMeKnow 👀👀👀

[residents-yt-comments]

[technofinch]

I have GOT to stop spending $30

[powerbottombrucespringsteen]

There was a movie called Juno and the songs featured on that movie were compiled into an official soundtrack. This is generally regarded as major historical event from the 2000’s.

[segamascott]

[mewwon]

the vivid sensory-memory of sucking water out of a washcloth as a child

[phorusrhacidae-lesbian]

unfortunately the english were incapable of making it greenwich nicies time

[ratbastarddotfuck]

you have to forgive the printer because it's one of the most machine-ass machines we interact with on a day to day basis. that thing says kerchunk. hardly anything says kerchunk these days. you can't get mad at her when she kerchunks up a little.

[digitalsymbiote]

Crazy that tech has gotten so bad that we're doing printer forgiveness now

[markovchaingang]

new report finds that over 30% of uranium in nuclear power plants is lost via engineers having a little bite when they think nobody's watching

[cheaphalloweencostume]

my least favorite literary smut turn of phrase is when a guy is like “im gonna ruin this pussy” “im gonna wreck this pussy for anyone else” like stop.. thats not yours…!

[goofda]

“Imma destroy that pussy” my friend 😔

[dailyphantomhands]

William Finley as Winslow Leach

[garaks-padded-cell]

Me on youtube as my food gets cold

[starofhisheart]

Happy pride to those 5 seconds where Charlie Swan thought Jacob was coming out to him in the most insane way possible

[importantcatpics]

[capitulouno]

[kurulover]

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

[kurulover]