meowgical-lesbian

Credit to bubbleweb-arts for the icon

[voidbat]

body: you are dying of The Heat

me: [removes blanket]

body: never have you been So Frozen

[ladyjolder]

me: [sticks one leg out]

body: perfect

[bongboops]

Demon to my now exposed leg:

[mindfulwrath]

honestly “i’ll do whatever you want” “then perish” is the single most powerful exchange possible in the english language and it’s from some bizarre “hewwo” obama rp

[fallingtowers]

And there was that other post where someone dreamt that Obama said “violence for violence is the rule of beasts” like what is it about Obama that makes people come up with such raw fucking dialogue for him

[twofingerswhiskey]

my mother had a dream where he lived in the forest and she had a cigarette with him and he said “to become god is the loneliest achievement of them all” and put it out and walked into the mist and i’ve never fucking forgotten that

[antiblackness-archive]

[antiblackness-archive]

[lotrlocked]

Reboot this post to be blessed with dream Obama’s wisdom

[robotmoxie-blog]

secondhand embarrassment is pure agony and i wish a lot of comedy didnt rely on it

[vaspider]

I cannot deal with it. I have to literally leave the room.

[ahaze]

It’s a sign of being extremely empathetic.

[kelssiel]

thanks! i hate it, how do i uninstall?

[supershybutpushingthroughit]

I would like to unsubscribe from my ultra empathy

[excima]

me

[wizzardhat]

these ads are pure fucking gold i haven’t stopped laughing for at least 7 minutes

[no-chill-at-all]

[feistyfrank]

[hellenthetenderness]

[danisontnonfire]

[hellenthetenderness]

[skylarthememequeen52-deactivate]

THE CAT IS OKAY. THE CHILD PICTURED IS EATING A DIFFERENT KIND OF SUSHI.

[hellenthetenderness]

[danisontnonfire]

[hellenthetenderness]

[magicalcake-deactivated20230604]

my mutuals: “so close to 30k followers!!!” “Omg just reached 40k!!!haha omg!!!

me: hello my 3 people i love u

[theaustinstollhaus]

When people go off about how English is the worst language, I just wanna point out a few things:

- Our future tense requires only one word (looking at you, Spanish)

- Words don’t change meanings depending on tone (Cantonese)

- We don’t live in some bizarre Beauty And The Beast world where we give inanimate objects genders (romance languages, German)

- Likewise, we don’t have have two different words for “they” because we don’t care whether “they” were male or female (Spanish, French)

- There’s no formal “you” because we don’t play mind games about whether or not we respect you (Spanish, German)

- We don’t alter the whole fucking language based on how much we respect you (Japanese)

- The letters and sounds might not be consistent, but at least we have letters, not just pictures (Mandarin)

- We don’t have a fucking stupid tense specifically for talking to two people because some idiot decided that a two-person tense was necessary (Arabic)

So yeah, I think we’re doing okay as a language

[theaustinstollhaus]

Oh and some of our plurals are irregular, but at least it’s not like every goddamn plural is an entirely new word so you have to learn every word twice

At least it’s not like that, right? Right, Arabic? WHAT A DUMB IDEA THAT WOULD BE, HUH, ARABIC?

[i-am-corbin-dallas]

But we do kinda have the tone thing. Like record and record, resume and resume, etc

[theaustinstollhaus]

For a few words, but you can mispronounce a lot and still get away with it. I’m referring to this:

[ginevre]

I love this post

[mysharona1987]

The screenwriter even admitted this, by the way.

[fattyatomicmutant-deactivated20]

Oh my fucking god we’re trapped in the timeline Marty fucked up

[dogjpeg]

moe anime girls are brachycephalic that’s why they make those shallow snuffly snorty breathing sounds when they get excited or do any kind of physical activity

[dogjpeg]

I’m watching Clannad and the moe brachycephalic hypothesis could also explain why the girls have such dazed movements, slow soft voices, and glazed over eyes. They just aren’t getting enough oxygen to their brain.

[tangarang]

selective breeding has rendered moes biological abominations

[triwizarded]

who here was on tumblr 4+ years ago

[carnival-phantasm]

[pr1nceshawn]

[lordandgodoftheobvious]

“Wrestle Me for America You Thieving White Shit” will never not be funny.

[fuckassmcgee]

2018 Predictions

• Donald Trunp will make up an assassination attempt against him (not stage one, just say it happened)

• Very brief trend of wearing shirts inside out

• Hackers will attack Ajit Pai and uncover some sort of secret fetish of his (my guess is piss or feet but who can say)

• Mothman sighting will re-emerge followed by most likely another bridge collapse or maybe a building

• Someone (Florida Man) is gonna try (and fail) to eat a crocodile alive

• Boston Dynamics is finally gonna make a robot you can ride

• A prank youtuber will do a livestream where they will actually get murdered for real

• The Hot New Meme™ will just be screaming (think rickrolling but 1000× worse)

[i-was-once-a--tortoise]

[brendenfraser]

“‘Pirates of the Caribbean 5’ sets course for 2017 release”

[pietriarchy]

I feel like everyone worships avocado and I’m struggling because it just tastes like compressed wet grass lump but nobody will listen and I’m all alone in this world