PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
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@theartofmadeline

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shark vs the universe
AnasAbdin
Misplaced Lens Cap
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
hello vonnie
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★

JVL

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@midsummernightsnate
burning food is an inherited trait
"this movie doesn't hold up bcos of dated special effects :(" to you, maybe. i would clap at a bat on a string
reblogs are back on for october! limited edition
“never kill yourself” is such a funny phrase to me that i think it’s accidently started working. its like an affrimation. say ‘never kill yourself’ enough times as a joke and maybe you won’t try to kill yourself over minor inconviences anymore
The whole concept of migraine triggers is just perfectly suited for making disabled people who are already suffering waste time & energy obsessing over every single thing they do every day, especially their diets, and to then blame themselves for their attack like their problem is a lack of discipline & willpower and not the fact that they have a chronic illness. If you get migraines, that isn't because your lifestyle & diet isn't sufficiently optimized, it's because you have a migraine disorder.
My neurologist didn't waste any time trying to get me to identify triggers and just got me on the right meds as soon as she could and I'm so glad she never made me feel like it was somehow my fault.
I'm now finally on a preventative that works for me & I literally don't do anything differently but I went from having daily migraines to sometimes not having a single one for over a week. I could do & consume every supposed trigger & still not get a migraine, when before the medication, I could do everything "right" every day for a week & still get a migraine every single day.
It's always like it's a medical disorder that causes your body to react badly to certain normal daily things & the goal should be to make it do that less, not to find ways to totally avoid all those normal daily things.
How why what
so many creatures putting SO much effort into putting ‘special’ fluids that TOTALLY aren’t water through every organ possible to clean them so they can use them again 2 seconds later. like why not simply sit on a damp substrate and pull water through your body by evaporating the extra out pores in your leaves lmaoooo
‘nooo nooo you don’t get it I need the big organ to run the fast firing nerves to run the machines that make the fluid go to work the big organ’. whatever chordate. lol
troubleshooting time: arid area, low on damp substrate. what do?
good question! you could try closing your leaf pores for a while until more appears… sometimes you can also put more tubes down and feel around until you find some. water comes from the opposite direction of the sun unless it doesn’t ❤️ glad I could help!!
omg useless advice from privileged mfs from wet climates as usual... bet you don't even use CAM.
ok first of all i checked your profile and of COURSE its all meadows, say youre a grass who does C4 without saying youre a grass who does C4 100% speedrun challenge. sorry i wasnt blessed with a whole separate sheath of cells for increasing photosynthetic efficiency and nothing else but some of us actually have to adapt and deal with the VERY REAL AND SEVERE effects of photorespiration... literally imagine having 30 foot deep roots posting this. second of all 'plants in wet climates are privileged' you can literally live in water and use CAM??? isoetes erasure per usual on this website, neglected by an angiosperm monocot no less. why am i not surprised
Snorfle snarfle hnarf munch munch
I love my job, but reblogging employment jelly for someone else I love.
Ça c'est le jell d'emploi. Reblog n'importe quand et tu recevra une travaille que tu adores et deserves.
A dating service where matching is based on people’s search history exists. You’re a serial killer. You go on a date with a writer.
Serial Killer: metaphorically, if you were to kill someone, how would you do it?
Writer: Air shot between the toes, it’ll look like a heart attack.
Serial Killer who is obviously in love already: *sucks in a breath* ok
Writer: how long would it take to die if you were to potentially stab someone in the guts
Serial killer: anywhere from 2 to 30 minutes
Writer, already bringing a ring out: *shaking* thanks
A++ addition
Writer: *shows the serial killer the murder scene they’re writing* babe, i’m not sure if this would actually work?
Serial killer: *kisses writer on the forehead and leaves, comes back later, a suspicious scent of blood coming off them* it works baby, you’re doing great
I LOVE THIS
Oh no, murder comedy is my jam
I love this, I love all of this, but quick question, does the author know? Like are they aware that their significant other is a serial killer or do they just think that they have a morbid sense of humor? It’d be even funnier if the author had no fucking clue, like how Aurthur Conan Doyle was apparently stupidly gullible, and on top of it they’re a horror or crime novelist. Like the serial killer works at a butcher shop or something so it’s completely normal for them to come home smelling like blood, no murders going on here, no sirey. Just my darling coming back home from a long day at work.
Now fast forward a bit and the author has managed to get their first book published, with loving support from the serial killer who helped them fine tune all the murder scenes, and it’s a big hit. Enough so that a detective with the local police department has noticed some disturbing similarities to several active cases, including details that were never released to the press. Obviously he brings this up to his superior and convinces him that there’s something to the theory, but it’s all circumstantial right now. He stakes out the author’s home and is super convinced that the author is the murderer, but they don’t seem to do anything??? Like they literally are at the house all day, that’s it. Most they do is leave for groceries.
So you get this dynamic of the serial killer mining the author for creative murder schemes, the author being lovingly encouraged by the serial killer, and finally the detective who is just so sure that the author is the killer and that if he sticks it out long enough he’ll FINALLY have proof.
Plot twist, The serial killer and detective use to go out so it gets sub what personal.
“You need to stop seeing them. I think they are a serial killer.”
Serial killer breaths in. “Look-”
…perfect
I don’t like actual murder mysteries, but this is perfect
THE ORIGINAL POST HOW DID I GET SO LUCKY
AFTER YEARS I HAVE FOUND IT, BEHOLD, MY BRETHREN
@scar-queen-owl @leal-love-lace @todorokitops @girlboss-sukuna
I’VE ONLY EVER SEEN SCREENSHOTS THIS POST IS LEGENDARY
I think it's a drunk art kind of night
I rarely do watercolor
So I accidentally used UV paint
Devastated that rbs were turned off. I need this on my blog.
I’m so√﹀\_︿╱﹀╲/╲︿_/︺╲▁︹_/﹀\_︿╱▔︺\/\︹▁╱﹀▔╲︿_/︺▔╲▁︹_/﹀▔\⁄﹀\╱﹀▔︺\︹▁︿╱\╱﹀▔╲︿_/︺▔\︿╱\︿︹_/▔﹀\_︿╱▔︺\︹╱﹀▔╲︿_/︺▔\╱﹀╲▁︹_/﹀\_︿╱▔︺\︹▁︿⁄╲︿╱﹀╲
hey has anyone seen my potion that turns you into the dow jones
people will say "why cant the eldritch gods just be nice to humans :((" and then kill a bug for existing near them
my dearly beloved mutual you cant just leave this in the tags
While exploring a vast and inscrutable city which seems to predate life on earth I am gently picked up by something incomprehensible with the higher-dimensional equivalent of a cup and piece of paper, then lovingly set outside in my natural habitat. Unfortunately the being exists outside of time and can't really tell human cities apart from one another so I appear without warning in ancient sumer.
“Many people seem to think it foolish, even superstitious, to believe that the world could still change for the better. And it is true that in winter it is sometimes so bitingly cold that one is tempted to say, ‘What do I care if there is a summer; its warmth is no help to me now.’ Yes, evil often seems to surpass good. But then, in spite of us, and without our permission, there comes at last an end to the bitter frosts. One morning the wind turns, and there is a thaw. And so I must still have hope.”
— Vincent Van Gogh
“If I am worth anything later, I am worth something now. For wheat is wheat, even if people think it is a grass in the beginning.”
- Vincent van Gogh
autism is living by vampire rules. light sensitivity. eating the wrong food makes you want to die. need to be explicitly invited places. weird sleep schedule. eating the same thing every time. specific rituals and routines. burst into flames at the sight of a crucifix. etc.
archeologists from the society of hyperintelligent ambulent radiotrophic fungi that inherit the earth picking through the strata of our rubble and concluding that while humans lived short, violent pointless lives, at least they could go to 7/11
the late holocene human was buried only after a careful series of chemical interventions to prevent rotting. it is posited that this had a religious purpose, as a body that was decomposing could not digest slurpees in death