crab crab crab hand hand hand frighten
i like them..

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@mildslime
crab crab crab hand hand hand frighten
i like them..
My most joyless, pedantic, Niel DeGrasse Tyson ass take is that I find the "Biblically Accurate Angel" meme annoying. I cannot see that joke without going "UHM ACTUALLY-"
For those asking: Listen, within Judaism, angels can look like whatever they want to look like. They are formless, and the og Bible has angels appearing as everything from strange wheels of eyes and winged faces, to ordinary guys.
Within Christianity, there are actually nine defined types of angels, each with their own distinct types of appearance and role in creation. The abstract looking angels are actually the minority. The term "biblically accurate angel" includes "regular looking guy"
Biblically accurate angel
If you ever feel bad just remeber there is a gif of me floating around tumblr of when I was 8 and I sat on the escalator and knocked down a table of jewelry at macys
you’re a fucking hamtaro blogger who the fuck cares what you think. stop making political posts and stick to posting hamtaro memes.
Are you mad that I get more pussy than you?
rearranges your dna alphabetically
You’d die
i wouldn't. because im doing it to you
remember that post going around about how cops will pop the hoods on their patrol cars to block the always-on dashcam while they beat someone up and was accompanied by a picture of 3 cop cars doing exactly that, and it got big enough that snopes stepped in to defend these poor defenseless officers, and their entire analysis was "this is fake because we asked those officers specifically and they pinky promised all 3 of them were raising their hoods to stop their engines from overheating", and then an actual auto mechanic stepped in and pointed out that popping the hood on an idling car in the southern summer sun would actually make the all-black engine block hotter? good times
https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/police-pop-hoods/
What’s True: They do this.
What’s False: There isn’t literally a section of the police handbook saying they’re allowed to block dashcams, so obviously they never do that and would be punished by their fellow cops if they did. Stop worrying about it.
*does this to you*
I’ve seen workplace autonomy get reduced at several jobs I’ve worked at and it always follows the same pattern, where the initial change is “that sucks and I think it’s dumb but at least I can see some rationale behind it” and subsequent changes become arbitrary reminders that your employer controls you.
When I worked at a distribution center, we used to be able to wear headphones. Then one day, someone working at a different distribution center got their headphone cords tangled up in the conveyors and was seriously injured, and we weren’t allowed to wear headphones anymore.
I hated the change, of course, and thought it was stupid, and wondered if the incident they mentioned even happened, but I could at least see the logic to it: “wearing cords around miles of conveyor systems is dangerous.”
So people started bringing portable radios and stuff to work. No cords, no blocked ears, no problem. Until those got banned too. Why? Because they could, and they showed that they could when they banned headphones.
Then I worked at a testing center. After a while, cell phones were banned. And again, there was some logic to the decision: for starters, we were surrounded by confidential information, and also needed to maintain a quiet and discreet atmosphere. It was obviously an unnecessary overreach and showed that they saw their employees as children, but they at least had some security concerns they could justify it with.
So people brought in books and magazines to read during downtime. And then books and magazines were banned too. Why? Because they could, and they showed that they could when they banned cell phones.
It’s tied up with the culture of… I don’t know if there’s a term for it, but it’s something we’ve all seen. If there’s no tasks left to do at work, then stare at a wall. If you’re on the clock, then don’t sit down even if there’s no reason not to sit down. Smile. That whole thing.
“right to wear headphones” should be a rallying point for workplace organization, anywhere doing so wouldn’t be physically unsafe
HMMM I WONDER WHAT CHANGED
>landslide victory
>50.7%
this image hits different in covid-19 isolation
my favorite tidbit about Kung Fu Panda is that China saw it and was like "how the fuck did we not think of this before"
China: we love kung fu and we love pandas
America: *makes a film about a panda who learns kung fu*
China: WHAT THE FUCK
i don’t know who needs to see this today, but you suck so much it’s unreal
Thanks. really needed this today
Wait I’m sorry I mean no disrespect but are you not going by P***y A** anymore? (Not Pussy Ass)
I’m trying to think of a joke response that’s even marginally funnier than the concept of my deadname being Pussy Ass and I can’t. It doesn’t exist.