Chase

Call me a tissue the way I got a lil boogie in me

[thecryptkeeper]

[strombolicious]

[teathattast]

reblog to do this w your mutuals

[unconventiononthelawofthesea]

atheist quarterback throws a hail darwin

[akindlyowl]

agnostic quarterback throws a hail maybe

[feldfrog]

The zoo sometimes lets peacocks around freely with the people. The aquarium should let some of the fish do that

[gonzos-humansona]

Yesterday my little brother told me something very sweet and touching, that when he was a kid and had nightmares about monsters chasing him or whatever he would be able to end the nightmare by finding me in the dream and I would protect him by fighting off the zombies, or carrying him away. This is adorable, and makes me feel like the greatest older sibling in the world, but the hilarious thing is that when I was a kid I had nightmares of needing to save him from zombies and such. so many dreams where he was in trouble and I needed to save him. Like my nightmares began where his ended. Low key I think he mastered the ability to psychically transfer his nightmare to me as a child and I'm kind of annoyed with him.

[3000s]

used to think you were my bud but i got weiser

[tomb-mold]

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

[gyrovagi]

the problem with employment is it gives you money to purchase video games but it takes away your time to play video games. Mao spoke of this

[tiktoks-i-enjoyed]

[sunflowerlovergirl]

[hatesaltrat]

The road to the childrens’ hospital

@swedishfalcon-actual

[enchantingsorceress]

I hope this joke outlives the context that made it, leaving future generations baffled.

[ceruleanheaven]

i just wanna do nothinggggg 😭😭😭😭😭 which is like what im already doing but i wanna do it in a way that doesnt actively ruin my life 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[sapphic-gengar]

oh thank goodness

[hurtstohope]

i have big plans to try and sew a little felt mouse and it might go badly and that’s okay

[hurtstohope]

he exists bc i made him

[targetedknowledge]

[fisutiddies]

[reginaldqueribundus]

stuff they actually let happen on Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Godzilla tried to eat Chancellor Palpatine

Darth Maul came back from the dead as a crime boss with robot legs and had a giant angry brother named Savage

Jabba the Hutt’s uncle was an offensive gay stereotype

Palpatine had a gigantic forehead for literally no reason

Zombie episode

They named a Jedi “I’m Gonna Die” and then killed him

Some senator had a sex robot

All the Twi’leks had French accents

Ahsoka got hunted for sport

Anakin had to do elaborate BDSM roleplay with an evil cat lady

Dooku was almost murdered by the Macbeth witches

Hondo Ohnaka

Yoda made contact with Qui-Gon Jinn’s ghost but the other Jedi just thought he had dementia

0.07 seconds after leaving the Jedi Order, Ahsoka crashed her motorcycle, got a girlfriend, and ended up smuggling drugs for the mob

Anakin and Obi-Wan met the physical incarnations of the Dark and Light Sides of the Force and they looked like a goth drama queen and his cottagecore sister and both of them were furries

Ahsoka got bit by an evil rat which made her evil for awhile

Jar Jar killed a guy

ASDLSFKSLKFSJDKLSJ

sorry for the long post but I just want to thank everyone for these tags. I’m shaking. Thank you so much.

[derpymidnight]

palpatine staged his own kidnapping like some sort of kink service

[reginaldqueribundus]

— tags via wellsbering

I mean… yeah

[stealthetrees]

Jabbas cousin ran off with a stripper and they got a bunch of blackmail on the hutts but then she killed him and went back to work for jabba

[bonbon-xo]

He works so hard! 🐸💚

[fieldexplores]

Never Learned - Gator Days

[twenty-fourth-order-simulacra]

...the alt text?