I wrote the opening scene of my book after spending months in writer's block... I would really appreciate some (brutally honest) feedback on this snippet. Pleasssseeeeee.
Evening light filtered through satin curtains into the room, giving it a dim, golden glow. Footsteps echoed around the room as guards reached for the lanterns, casting spells that made the room as bright as morning.
In the silence, Jade only watched as his father stepped up to the front of the long table. Once he was on his seat, boots clicked against the marble floor until everyone else had their seats as well. Jade was the last to reach his seat, pulling it forward with a screech that earned him looks.
Jade looked around the room, avoiding gazes, taking in the serenity— or what once felt serene to him, in the courtroom. He imagined being outside this time, laying on grassy fields with his only roof, the sky. He stared at the seats and tried picturing them with Emmie, Zalor, and Huford instead of the mages in their ivory cloaks.
“By Destiny’s grace,” his father started.
“May peace upon us,” the others finished in chorus.
They were praying. Jade was supposed to pray. He tried to push off the feeling that he entirely missed a prayer, let alone in his very first court meeting. As if to make up for it, his hands joined together.
“Jade?” Jade turned to meet his father’s eyes, lined with a measured amount of worry a king could afford to show for his son. Jade only shook his head, murmuring a response that went unheard.
Jade’s mind wasn’t fully in the courtroom as the meeting commenced. There were times when he would catch a few important lines or his father would try to include him into the conversation more, but he wouldn’t utter more than a few, mumbled words. He payed close attention to the papers passed around, maps of trading routes and reports from the bordering villages. Even though he only heard a few spoken sentences here and there, it was enough to get him thinking.
“We can’t hold them back anymore,” a mage with square glasses said as he stood up. His neighbours held him back, consoling him, though his voice rose higher as he added, “It’s impossible to keep the villages safe with the resources we have!”
Another, more composed mage spoke. “I’m afraid, Mg. Griffin has a point here, your majesty. Suppressing it as a small rebellion would not only do harm to the villages, but help the rebellion grow more.”
His father seemed in thought. Jade looked at him in desperation, his eyes widening upon two words he caught hold of. Rebellion? Harm? His father hadn’t explained any of that to him.
Or to the kingdom.
Jade felt too foolish to ask. He just watched his father shake his head, the simple gesture giving rise to mumbles and retorts.
“We have to declare it officially, your majesty.” One woman pointed out.
“The kingdom should know the truth too.”
“Trust your subjects, your majesty, they’ll be forever on the kingdom’s side.”
Jade’s mind was racing to find an answer in their words. He had heard these terms before. In his history books, in official records, and he knew what they hinted at. The mumbles grew around the room.
“Stop it.” Jade rose from his seat, though it was his fists on the table that were louder than his command. Anyhow, the room went quiet.
He couldn’t find anymore words to say. Maybe that was what his father was expecting, as he looked at him with those eyes, with faith. With hope that he would act like the leader he was meant to be one day.
No, traumatising your characters isn't that important. Infact, having a backstory isn't important either.
Only give your character a backstory if it somehow affects their present. It doesn't matter if those effects contribute to the plot or not, a character's past must always reflect in their present in some way. Maybe they avoid specific things/words? Maybe they flinch at something without knowing why? Perhaps their past has drilled something so hard in their head that even though they're healed, a part of them instinctively does what they were told to.
"Backstories" aren't an accessory. Make them have an impact.
Hey guys, 👋 I'm thinking of holding a writing competition. Firstly, I want to clear that there won't be any cash prizes, it's just for fun and exploring creative ideas. (Yes! Fanfictions allowed!) I'm still not sure about this though.
If this idea gets enough likes/reblogs that surely I will conduct a for-fun writing contest in the upcoming month (September) which also happens to be near my birthday!! 🎂
I'm just posting this beforehand so I'm aware of how many people are actually interested and willing to participate, so that the competition doesn't go in vain.
I sit on a rock, looking deep into the waters below. But I only see myself. A form of me I never got used to. Rough, ugly skin. Tangled hair and a ghostlike face. The thing I hate most though, is the deformed, tail-like figure from below the waist.
It's almost like if I'd never had legs. Yet, I vividly remember that day, walking on two distinct legs on the deck of a boat. I was twelve then. I remember my father putting his pirate cap on my head, which slipped down to cover my eyes. And then... I remember... Water.
I think about that day very often, though the thought of that crew only makes my thirst for revenge grow severe. I hear the other mermaids splashing, playing in the water, or see them sunbathing on the rocks, but all of our watching, waiting.
My eyes move from a young siren to the distance in front of. Warm winds blow over my face, waves slapping on the foot of the rock where I perch. I feel the blood drip down from the palms I so heavily cling onto the jagged rock with, just as a moving figure sails into sight.
A ship.
A shout is heard, followed by another as several sirens swim innocently towards the ship, including me. I crane my neck to get a look at the captain, but to my dissapointment his face is not the one which appears in my nightmares.
"Walk!" He shouts over the top of his voice, which tells me he's got his ears covered to resist our song. And then, the plank on my side of the ship creaks with little footsteps of a young, brave girl who takes the one last breath they'd allow her to take on the ship.
She doesn't scream when she's pushed into the water.
I know the title is bland-- but hey! Give me a chance. This is my first time giving writing advice so I thought of starting with a topic I consider myself to be actually good at. Characters.
Characters are not just puppets you tie with strings to move around as per convenience of the plot. They're people, with choices, desires, obstacles and flaws. So today, I'm going to show you how to shape them imperfectly.
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 Step 1: A rough sketch.
Sum up your character as a mix of different traits, tropes, or existing characters. This helps because you know and love your comfort characters, so you'll know your character better. However, don't rely fully on one or two characters, or don't make your charcter an exact replica of your favourite one. Feel free to experiment, mix up, and add your original ideas!
Since you've probably not understood my advice... because I'm bad at explaining, feel free to dm/ask me if you have any doubts! (I'm trying to keep this as short as possible)
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 Step 2: The lineart
Confine your character. Give them unique traits and flaws. Quirky habits and rational/irrational fears. Don't necessarily give them a backstory yet.
Most importantly, give your character strengths and weaknesses. Especially weaknesses. Making your character overly perfect usually makes them boring. Your reader won't feel connected to them and if your reader doesn't feel connected to your character, they won't bother to read the story.
Remember, your story thrives on the connection between readers and characters, not a fancy plot or magic system.
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 Step 3: Filling colour
Go through your character's personality, write it down if you want, and then decide their appearance. Their name, surname, and other details. This step can be done after "Step 4", but I prefer doing it before so I have a character to visualise in my head who's no more faceless. Maybe decide things for them that wouldn't even be mentioned in the story, like birthdays.
Having a clear appearance of the character in mind now gives you an image of your character as a person, not just an expressionless puppet. You can have fun experimenting with different colours, styles, and maybe even draw it out if you're an artist!
Get creative!
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 Step 4: The background
Add the world around your character, if you don't already have one. Give them family members, friendships and other relations. How do their parents/friends treat them? What is their relationship with their siblings (if any) like? How did this affect their upbringing?
A person's background and upbringing reflects a lot in their character. The same is true for fictional characters. Therefore, when deciding the past of your character, don't have it simply exist as a little tragic backstory. Don't simply kill of their parents because, "they can't do cool things with their parents being alive." Have your character's backstory shape the way they are today.
Like, maybe they flinch everytime someone touches them, because they were used to beatings/sa? Maybe they stutter at random words because they were made fun of for their voice in the past? Little things matter.
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ᯓᡣ𐭩 Step 5: Shading
Give your character a side no one, or only a few, knows about. Write the voice inside their head. What thoughts do they not speak aloud? Is it because they're afraid? Doubting themselves? Or because they're sure no one will listen?
What thoghts keep coming back to your character's mind? Not just of the past, but the future, or maybe the present? Are they an overthinker? Do they keep secrets? Are they good at keeping secrets?
It's really helpful to write down your character's thoughts or inner monologue, as a writing exercise that makes you understand them better. Maybe write a scene about them talking with another character, or just themselves. Write a scene from their childhood or future. It doesn't matter if the scenes are important to the book or not, or even if they're part of the character's life. They can just be little headcanons or AUs for them.
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That's it! Feel free to be original, unique and don't care about sticking closely to these steps. These are just words of advice, and I would be glad to know how you feel about it. Tips and critisms are VERY welcome!
Who wants to make a new oc today? (And probably share them in the comments?)
prguitarman
tangentwithtanner
andulkaphoto
izzy806
yousharknotpass
discoholicmusic
