Someplace on the internet

[shanehollandered]

ilya + his very judgemental eyebrows

[sarking]

Lemme just write this real quick to get it out of my system

Oh no it's deeper in my system

[mosswitch5000]

Ilya would be delighted by this, and would absolutely talk to the French-Canadian players about their hockey sticks in biblically accurate european french.

[mosswitch5000]

Chapter 24 - Nobody Ever Kissed Me Quite Like the Way That You Did

Fate Will Twist the Both of You, an Astronaut AU Heated Rivalry Fanfic

This is probably my favorite chapter I've released to date, and that caveat is because my most favorite chapter I've written is yet to be released, so this is a great time to support a WIP fanfic and get caught up before my MAGNUM OPUS OF ANGST drops.

Anyway - snippet from Chapter 24:

Shane wiggled his toes in the sand as he watched Lisa and Wyatt’s wedding. It was a pretty casual affair, most folks showing up in everyday, beach-appropriate clothes. Wyatt had cuffed the legs of his suit pants, and both he and Lisa stood barefoot on the beach like most of their guests. There were maybe thirty people total in attendance, including a dozen or so astronauts. Wyatt and Lisa’s crew for LBM-17 would be heading out to Florida after the break, while Shane and LBM-24 would be headed into the lab, so this was the last time many of the attendees would be seeing each other for a while. There was a good chance that he wouldn’t see Leah, Max, and CJ, who were all on the crew for 41, until they made it up to the moon themselves, almost two years from now. It was nice to have a reason to get together, an unofficial send off, even if it was odd to see everyone out on a beach wearing regular clothes instead of their usual jumpsuits.

Looking around, nearly everyone’s attention was on the happy couple. Wyatt’s nephew, Isaac, was running around the group, clutching the ring box in one hand, while Lisa’s niece Kiara stood still with her empty flower girl basket, taking on her job with utmost seriousness. Some of the scattered rose petals were tumbling over the sand in the breeze. Wyatt’s sister Kristy was crying, with her wife Eve’s arms wrapped around her. The astronauts stood in clumps, smiling on at their friends.

His eyes caught on Rozanov, standing on the opposite side of the circle. He looked absolutely stunning, golden curls catching the sunlight, tossed by the sea breeze. On one side of his body, his silky black shirt—only halfway buttoned up—fluttered in the wind, opening to show the ever-present gold chain and part of his muscular chest. On the side facing toward the ocean, it clung to every bulge and ripple, leaving no mysteries about what was underneath, shapes that Shane had traced with hands and lips and teeth.

Swallowing hard, he forced his gaze back to Wyatt and Lisa. He had not been to many weddings—a couple for his older cousins while he was in school, plus Hayden and Jackie’s, almost seven years ago now. His own future wedding wasn’t something he had ever thought too much about, no strong opinions on what it might be like beyond its presumed inevitability. He’d just sort of run with the default assumptions provided. Finish school, establish his career, meet the right person, settle down. A summer wedding outside on the green grass, with a center aisle and a family on each side, a white dress and a black tux, with Hayden as his best man. It was an amalgam of every wedding he’d been to, or seen in TV and movies. It was what everyone did, how you met life milestones, became an adult. When he’d decided to apply to the Selene Program, however, that had all been postponed in the project plan of his life. An idea rolled in bubble wrap and put in a box on the shelf, ready to be pulled down later, when it was needed again.

Watching the Morris-Hayeses now, both beaming enormous smiles, laughing and joking through unconventional vows, with a smattering of guests standing around them in a happy cluster, it shifted something inside of him. There could be other options, permission to deviate from the standard script. If he pulled that box down from the shelf now, it would feel like a pair of unworn dress shoes, too tight, that he had never learned to dance in. The image became impossible to hold in his mind—it slipped away, the green grass fading, the rows of chairs gone, no arch of flowers. It was not as terrifying as it would have been before today, because Lisa and Wyatt looked happy; their friends and family were supporting them while they did it their own way. Granted, Lisa and Wyatt were still a white dress and a black suit, while the growing fear at the back of Shane’s mind asked ‘what if that isn’t an option for me?’

Keep reading on Ao3

or Start from the beginning

Do you like delicious character exploration? What about longing and angst? How about a couple fun OCs to make their world a little more diverse? Astronauts, and eventually the moon?

What about emotional, load-bearing-plot smut? Obscure references to 90s SciFi? A little bit fix it, a lot staring right into everything Shane and Ilya are going through and feeling and not talking about, taking it apart and putting it together again?

How about Shane and Ilya having some better friends to rely on, and building their army of allies? Svetlana and Shane being hockey nerds in this universe to? Gently laid breadcrumbs and callbacks that all tie together?

[mosswitch5000]

Chapter 23 of Fate Will Twist the Both of You, my heated rivalry astronaut AU fic is up.

And it’s a good time to get on board because chapter 24 is one of my favorite things I’ve written so far. (It’s only second to chapter 29. Am I a tease? Yes.)

Shane walked in to Rozanov’s room and immediately grabbed his neck, pulling him in for a kiss. He pushed one knee in between the other man’s legs, escalating, teasing with his tongue.

Rozanov suddenly pulled away, grunting with annoyance. Cold panic prickled in his chest.

“Wait. We need to talk about Russia trip,” Rozanov gritted out.

Right now? “What about it?” he asked, impatient. He wanted to get them both undressed and moaning, not talking and thinking—there had been too much of that today, he very much wanted to stop thinking.

Rozanov grabbed both of his wrists, pushed his hands together, and gave them a little shake as he stared intensely at Shane. “This is very serious. I need you to follow rules harder than you have ever followed a rule before, do you understand?”

“What rules? What are you talking about?” Rozanov had always made fun of him for caring too much about shit like that, but in the two minutes since Shane had gotten here, he had been acting very oddly.

“Rules I am about to give you for Russia.” His eyes were wide, there was fear in them. Shane had never seen him scared of anything, but he was frightened now.

Read the rest of Chapter 23 or start at the beginning.

[writingdose]

genuine writers getting wrongly accused of using ai because of witch hunt and proper grammar/structure in their works must be what being a woman in the 1600s who is wrongly accused of being a witch because she can read and is intelligent feels like

[mosswitch5000]

There’s like zero timelines in which I don’t get accused of witchcraft on account of being weird, ungovernable, and fucking competent in a way the normies can’t comprehend.

[mosswitch5000]

Chapter 22 of Fate Will Twist the Both of You, a heated rivalry Astronaut AU

Excerpt, Hollander’s “moon speech”, a piece of writing in very fond of.

“Commander Hollander? What does it mean to you to be selected? To be the first leader of mankind living off our planet?”

Hollander cleared this throat, gave them his media smile, and started in on the speech. Ilya could see the teleprompter start to scroll, Shane’s eyes flicking between it and the cameras.

“Thank you for such a great question. First of all, I’m beyond honored to have not only had the opportunity to be considered for the Selene Program, but to be selected as Mission Commander for its first crew of lunar residents. It’s an honor I will never take lightly. I know I will carry with me the dreams not just of one boy from Canada who grew up looking at the stars, or the hundreds of candidates, the thousands of staff, trainers, and employees of all our international space agencies, but of the millions and billions of humans across time who have looked up at our moon with wonder and curiosity. This is a huge milestone for our scientific and exploration achievements. Having a permanently-established settlement on the moon moves humanity to our next phase as a species. We will not be limited to one world, one ball of light in the sky—we will have become citizens of space.”

Ilya could read the subtle lines of Hollander’s performance, the way he held himself a little extra stiffly, hands folded on the table top, every movement controlled and intentional, but to anyone who didn’t catalog every detail of Shane Hollander as he did, it would be invisible. He was photo-ready, a clean picture of excellence—well-spoken and trustworthy competence projected for the world to consume.

“And what makes the moon so special? Why not Mars, or expanded space stations?” prompted the reporter, the moment pre-arranged, the cue for Hollander’s moon speech.

“Well, there will be an expansion of orbital space stations as part of the support systems needed to operate a lunar base. But to answer your question, why the moon? The moon is important to us not just as a milestone but as a symbol.

“The moon has always been a part of us. Long before the first life on earth flourished, the moon was part of the earth. Through an unthinkable cosmic cataclysm, we were torn apart, but we both survived. The moon formed from our wounds, but now we are paired together in space, forever by each other’s side. There’s no other planet we know of like earth, no other planet with life, and no other moon like ours. I don’t think it’s coincidence that the unique circumstances of earth and moon together made us who we are. We are the only planet in our solar system with a single moon, and our moon stays locked with her face always looking to us, giving us our tides, her regular, dependable phases to help us track time. Our moon has formed everything that we are. This proto-planetary tragedy may have become our greatest strength. And all the time, she’s been protecting us, and our special, fragile, rare cradle of life. A cratered surface of battle scars and stretch marks, earned through a great act of sacrifice and creation.

“While science has taught us so much about the moon’s function, it’s our mythology and legend—the countless stories from every human society that have given us the moon’s soul. I find that inspiring. The Ancient Greeks and Romans didn’t know about the formation of the solar system or the gravity that molded the moon and attracted asteroids, but they could create the mythology of the moon as a protector goddess. Many cultures tie the moon to fertility, harvest, and agriculture, sustaining and nourishing. They knew how tides affected us, but not what caused them, or how rare that just might be in the universe. Others saw the moon as representing a guide, a lover, a giver of blessings. Chinese mythology depicts the moon as a protector, a source of immortality, of longing, and the new year. She is always there to guide us forward.

“The moon is all of these things to humanity, in the past and into our future. We can look back at history and say that they made these stories because they did not have the scientific knowledge that we have today, but I know there will be more mysteries about the moon yet for us to discover, and more stories yet to be told.

“I could not be more honored, more filled with wonder, joy, and purpose to be part of this mission, and to travel across space to join our partner, the moon. To feel the vastness of our universe and see everything humanity has ever done or been, encapsulated here on one little blue planet. The complexity of it can be overwhelming up close, where we get lost in the details and the noise of what makes us different from each other. But that isn’t all that we are.

“This mission isn’t about me, or my crew, or the countless people who have devoted their lives and minds to making it possible. It’s about humanity. It’s about seeing us as one humanity together, on one planet, in this one precious place in the universe, and following that core hunger that we as humans have to explore over that next horizon. So when we launch, I hope to look back at our beautiful blue world, and think of everything we can accomplish together, and never tire of seeing earth in the sky, just like I hope everyone will remember to look up at the moon and know that humanity is out there, two parts of one whole destined to always be together in the dark, and that we have more in common than we will ever have as difference.”

🌕🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔

Read the full chapter 22 here.

Or start at the beginning.

[mosswitch5000]

Ugh, drag me grammar daddy

[tokkibean]

i do not “delete sentences” when they start “hindering the plot” i COPY PASTE THEM into a SEPARATE DOC made just for keeping all my USELESS LINES that i will also NEVER USE so therefore i should JUST DELETE THEM but i DONT because id FEEL BAD if i did

[harpyharpyharpy]

You don't actually have to kill your darlings. You can just put them in the oubliette #myoubliette

[scacao-blog]

I have to put them in timeout until I have some emotional detachment to them so I can finally delete them

[mosswitch5000]

My thoughts on oopsies, being inspired by a fic that used genAI in its creation.

So, that's a bummer, right? It would be a lie to say I'm not bummed. I really do hate GenAI so much. I hate that we call everything COMPUTAH does AI because of marketing, and tech bro scams, and the general public not understanding the difference between traditional algorithms, trained data models, and generative AI, and even how generative AI works.

I'm a personal and professional hater. I am anti-AI in my professional life, and while I personally haven't suffered any massive repercussions, it hasn't been fun, and this whole things is playing out. This is a thing that I'm morally against, is garbage, and genuinely still might end my career.

So yeah, I'm anti-AI.

And I'm also someone who genuinely read fics like Wolfbird and probably others that used genAI to some or a larger than we know extent. Unknowingly, undetected by me.

And Apogee.

I've joked, as it says it in my fic notes, that Apogee was the fic that whispered my password, and activated my latent inner fic writer like a sleeper agent. I liked the story, and it made me feel, and it made me want to write for the first time in a very, very long time. I don't think something that is 100% genAI can do that, but it doesn't matter.

I've had a number of feelings about it. Shame for not noticing, for feeling duped, and regret that the thing that inspired me, that set me off on my journey had be tarnished.

I had to sit with that for a bit. That all happened, and so has the last three months of me joyfully discovering writing, and engaging with others about it.

So what?

It's not going to make me like genAI more. I'm not and will not be an AI-apologist, and that's not what this post is.

At the end of the day, the thing that inspired me is still the thing the inspired me. It doesn't matter, because I was still inspired. I still took that spark, and I wrote a thing that I'm proud of. I am glad that I was inspired. Maybe at this point, the how/what is immaterial.

And as much as I absolutely refuse to cede my intelligence, my one weird human brain to AI, I also refuse to cede my joy. They can't take that from me.

So maybe I was fooled here, and I'm sure I will get fooled by AI again. When it happens, I will learn a new thing, and have no choice but to move on. I will set the junk down and keep writing. Keep enjoying unique, original human joy and art. Because they can't take that from me, and that's the only way to win.

[mosswitch5000]

Chapter 18 Posted

Fate Will Twist the Both of You, an Astronaut AU Heated Rivalry Fic

The wheel on Shane’s rowing machine whirred as he did his morning workout. They had a much better gym here, and there was a lot more space, but in some ways it felt like Antarctica had; the job was their whole world, and the same thirty astronauts were always in each other’s orbit. Even if there were more staff around, bosses, technicians, and liaisons from other departments, and even if they were put on different schedules, running different sims, they’d still get recombined in another way, put on another shift, pulled into an all crew meeting. There was no getting away from each other.

If he had felt plagued by the temptation of Rozanov’s constant presence at the beginning of Camp, lost among two hundred candidates, that was nothing on how it felt now. After knowing exactly what he was missing, and still having to see him across a much smaller space. Still watching the same mannerisms he had come to know like the back of his own hand. Like the move where he used his shirt to wipe the sweat from his face, baring his stomach to any who were looking. Or the way he always fidgeted, sending flickers of movement up his forearms, and flames down Shane’s spine.

There had been a time when it had been a pleasant tease, a little appetizer to see it across the room, and know he could have the whole meal later. But there was no later anymore, just the frustration of being tempted and left wanting. If humanity had ever wondered if it was possible to get a hard-on while on a rowing machine, then he could put that mystery to rest. He finished his workout—it hadn’t done anything to take the edge off of his mood—and sat in the small locker room, trying to compose himself before he had to go back out and face anyone. The door creaked as someone walked in. He was still staring at his sneakers when he heard Rozanov swear under his breath; he looked up just in time to see him turn on his heel and march right back out of the locker room.

Of course. It wouldn’t have been anyone else because no one else seemed to be tethered just behind his sternum. No matter what move one of them made, the other would coming swinging past, pulled by some invisible force that bound them together. Rozanov was there when he ran a drill to get everyone into the emergency shelter that would be under their lunar habitat, muscles flexing as he helped Anita and Lisa into the hatch. Rozanov was there when the commander hopefuls got pulled into Theriault’s office, all twelve of them packed into a space meant for maybe half that. They didn’t always succeed in claiming opposite sides of the room, and would have to stand next to each other, tension vibrating in the carefully held space between them. The part of him that always knew where Rozanov was in a room didn’t get left behind on that boat, or dissipate in Ottawa. Everywhere he went, it followed him around the world just fine, each nerve ending lighting up in awareness.

Rozanov was there when Shane and Scott presented a construction project plan—directing his questions to Scott alone, as if Shane didn’t exist, that strong brow lowered in thought, as he considered the answers. Rozanov was there when Shane surfaced from the pool, toned limbs crawling out of an EVA suit in nothing but snug swim trunks, sweat plastering curls to his head. Rozanov was there in the gym, flushed and sweaty. Rozanov was there in a classroom, long legs stretched out under a table. Rozanov was there in the cafeteria, in the sim module, in the halls, or coming out of his room while Shane waited for the elevator. He started taking the stairs near his own room instead.

Rozanov was always there. And he always looked good. He always sounded good. He was mean to few people and kind, in his own way, to nearly everyone else. Except Shane. Shane was being ignored so hard it was like he was invisible. He was trying to resist the growing itch under his skin, but it wasn’t going away. Was it possible to be pissed off at someone and also horny for them at the same time? Apparently yes.

Read the rest of the chapter on Ao3

or Start from the Beginning

[redwinerozanova]

red wine supernova, fall right into me

[kleefkruid]

saying cats don't contribute to the household is slander: they do have a job and it's going into mystery crevices and collecting all the cobwebs on their stupid little head

[mosswitch5000]

If there is wet paint anywhere, my idiot gremlin will find it.

[mosswitch5000]

While editing, you find that you accidentally first personed a thought in a third person pov, so you feel like an idiot and search the entire thing for instances of “I guess”, because you’ve probably messed that up someone else too, only to find that only one character uses that phrasing in dialogue (with a couple minor exceptions, including one where someone was mirror said first character), so bonus positive feeling, I guess (yeah) you’ve got your voice for them figured out.

[shop5]

let’s be real the pressure to use AI as an adult is exactly what they said the pressure the do drugs as a teenager would be like but the people that told us that caved immediately for the AI and definitely did not just say no

[forgetful-nerd]

Spelling mistakes? I guarantee neither of us saw those at 3:00 AM Monday Morning.

[wizardshark]

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

[saspitite]

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING

[elizapad]

Happy Pride, cave dwellers 🦇