"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?
thy mother
Art thou for fucking real
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@mothpersonfromspace
"Whimsy" is truly a wretched term. What maketh thee so carefree?
thy mother
Art thou for fucking real
I ever tell you guys about my ethically dubious radio show back in college? The Mad Dad Hour?
it was an entire radio show built around perpetuating a very simple joke, but it was uniquely powerful in its capacity to prompt the reaction I was looking for.
so my slot was at the tail end of rush hour, and i got a fair number of listeners/callers who were on the way home from the office. And like, I had a lot of callers, who almost all wanted to request songs that really didn’t fit with the aesthetic. I had pitched a power pop show when i got my slot, but the callers were not having it; they invariably wanted classic rock.
this made sense in a way. if you think about the demographics of the people who listened to the radio for music in 2010 instead of their ipods or cds or whatever, you’d expect them to skew older right? accordingly, i quickly realized that almost all of the people who called to request songs were Dads of a Certain Age. It was honestly annoying at first - I’m all for most classic rock, but that wasn’t what the show was supposed to be.
And so one day, when i was feeling particularly annoyed with requests that just didn’t fit thematically, i came up with the joke that rapidly became the only reason I kept the show going. Per station rules, I had to play a certain number of pre-recorded PSAs during my show, and before I cut to one I was supposed to read out the song titles and artists for all the music i had played before the break. So this one day when i had to inform the world before the break that the song they just heard was, per a listener’s request, Hey Jude by the Beatles, I decided to do a goof. I said:
“and finally, that last song you heard was Hey Jude, which was of course written and performed by the Rolling Stones.”
I barely had time to get the ads going before the phone started ringing. See, I had been assuming people would realize i was making an obvious joke by claiming one of the most well-known Beatles tracks was a Stones song, but i had failed to consider that my listeners were mostly 55-70 year old dads who were irritated from a long day in the office.
And when those dads heard me, a millennial woman, get the artist of an extremely well-known beatles song WRONG???!
they HAD to call in to correct my ignorance. never in a polite way either, it was condescending and annoyed or nothing. and like, they were just SO personally insulted by my inaccurate reporting that it took a massive amount of effort for me to avoid cracking up during the call. I had never understood why some people would enjoy trolling random strangers on the internet before, but in that moment, I understood the appeal entirely.
obviously i did it again right before the next commercial break, immediately after playing Don’t Stop Me Now by Queen David Bowie.
the phone immediately began to ring.
“ARE YOU AN IDIOT?” one of the callers began, “DAVID BOWIE???? THAT WAS QUEEN!”
“I thought David Bowie was the lead singer of Queen though?” I replied with as much innocent earnestness as i could conjure.
I could hear an intake of breath as the infuriated boomer on the other end of the line struggled to figure out where to even start.
And thus, the Mad Dad Hour was born.
@eduards-stuff I kept doing the same joke for an hour a week for an entire year, and the dads NEVER caught on. After episode 1 of the new format I started taking the angry dad calls on air, which added another layer of hilarity to the whole concept.
My friends on campus knew that hay I was doing and enjoyed tuning in, but only one actual listener ever figured out what I was doing, and he was literally a random 30 year old guy from the netherlands with access to an early internet connection radio service. He was possibly my only actual fan. I only know about him because he went to the effort of making a skype and paying for international service so he could call in, and while I got a few calls from him, the first remains my favorite:
me: hi there, you’ve got TST-
him: *strained, wheezing dutch laughter*
me: hey, is everything o-
him: pfffHAHAHAAH YOU MAKE THEM SO MAD. THEY THINK SO LITTLE OF YOUUUUUUUU BUT THE MEN ARE THE ONES WHO ARE FOOLISH! HA! HA! HA! YOU HAVE DUPED THEM!
me: sir i do not know you and i have never even seen you but i am in romantic love with you.
you can do this thing called hug me a lot and it'll pay off because of my soft
yo bro do the thing
the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped
Lots of drama in our household
galadriel voice "things that were once $5 are now $20"
friend who went to bed is a type of dead wife
If tumblr dies DM me for my full home address and we can have a barbecue
Links to my free sewing patterns! - big manta ray - smaller manta ray - monster friend (those monsters with horns I’ve been making lately, but without horns) - pie slice - Fred, the Fish of Minimal Effort - tiny cat (aka Jiji) - mini mothman - whale shark/donut whale shark - juggling frog/toad (aka my smallest, simplest frog pattern of the three I’ve made) - large frog - tiny hedgehog - minecraft bee - minecraft zombie - blorbo - Strawberry Hearts quilt pattern - starfish - little octopus - canvas tote (wider than it is tall) - canvas tote (taller than it is wide, more of a grocery bag) - basic bat and ghost - mini mushroom friends - whale - hammerhead shark - simple seal - cartoon flea (the one from Emperor’s New Groove) - little stingray - little alien - mini bee Tutorials: - flannel baby blanket tutorial - onigiri bag tutorial - tomato pattern design walkthrough (how I design the pattern, not a link to the pattern itself) - giant worm tutorial (I don’t know why it’s marked mature? it’s a worm)
Mini bee pattern is added! It’s not what was winning the “what pattern to share next” poll but it did turn out I’d already done like 95% of the work needed to share the pattern like…years ago so I went ahead and shared it since it was easy to do so As always, if the timestamp on this reblog isn’t super recent, it’s worth clicking through to the original post, I’ll update it every time I share another pattern here on tumblr. Also, I keep forgetting, but I do have a ko-fi ! Supporting me on ko-fi is not a requirement to keep me sharing patterns, I will do that regardless, but I promised my mom I’d get better at remembering to share the link lol
i don't really want to weight in on the "using big words in your writing is ableist" discourse happening on tiktok because i'm like 90% certain it's an anti-intellectual psyop to stir up drama in online circles to promote the use of ai to summarize literally everything and thus feeding the LLMs and lowering the populace's mistrust of such tools but i also have to say: dictionaries and thesauruses are the most accessible they've ever been. if you use an e-reader of any kind you can look up a word without leaving the page. there's a plethora of online dictionaries and if you just type a word + "meaning" into google it'll usually give you a definition. we used to have pocket dictionaries we used when reading in class. i have two on my shelf right now that i used in high school. stop letting the fascists purposefully misuse anti-ableism rhetoric to trick you into never thinking again.
I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
Don't become a housewife.
And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.
If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.
also, many women/people experience controlling behaviour and domestic violence from their partner for the first time during pregnancy. don’t risk thinking “he’s just stressed, it’ll get better when the baby comes” because it won’t. neither you and your child will ever be safe with that man. get out as early and safely as you can
work tomorrow is one of the worst things that can happen to you
What do you think you're trying to understand about your story?
Dimension 20: Neverafter — Episode 9, “Origins”
#the allegory to Black boyhood Lou brought to this character is simply unmatched by any other adaptation of pinocchio. it's That Good.
"Shimmering night" by Inaslind.
despite everything, it’s still you (derogatory)
wait hey man wait whoah hey