Ms-Sardonicus

~Some of my distractions~ This is a personal blog & I reblog whatever I like. Snape is not the only thing I post but THIS IS A SNAPE POSITIVE BLOG. Consider my icon a little clue.

[granadabrettishholmes]

[mrs-sardonicus]

Hooolllyyy.. I’d forgotten this move.  Did anyone ever make a parallel to this? 

?  Coincidence, or...? 

[remuslupiny]

Donald trump probably supports snape :/

[enoughofyourshitblr]

said the maraudefen

[mrs-sardonicus]

Let’s think.... rich, privileged, brash, used to always getting his way...

Not. sounding. like. Snape. to. me.

[champagnemanagement]

favorite slang terms for penis

kicky-wicky (1602)

long plum (1613)

bald-pate friar (1656)

silent flute (1720)

gaying instrument (1811)

liver-disturber (1888) (yikes)

master of ceremonies (1890)

father confessor (1890)

quimstick (1896)

patootie (1927) (cutie patootie)

ambassador (1927)

kidney-buster (1935) (double yikes)

dingle-doodle (1935)

dingwallace (1951)

snorker (1963)

corned beef torpedo (1975)

all selected from the timeline of slang terms for the penis

[fattyatomicmutant-deactivated20]

What the hell happened in 1888 and 1935?

[godshinjiikari]

I’m calling mine master of ceremonies now

[cosmically-caffeinated-owl]

sinitori

[not-a-space-alien]

Not gonna lie I can’t really picture any of you guys as real live people clickity clacking on computer keyboards or flicking a phone’s screen with your thumb I picture you all as square 2D avatars floating awash in a hellish sea of blue with thoughts and images erupting from you at odd intervals 

[weloveshortvideos]

[tach0la-deactivated20180420]

i died 5 times watching this

[mrs-sardonicus]

Well, easy explanation, this is Ninja school.

[obviousplant]

I added this fake health brochure about Donald Trump to a doctor’s waiting room

[mrs-sardonicus]

So,maybe it’s just me but seems you can’t just copy-paste in gifs anymore. 

Because of course tumblr doesn’t happen to have what I wanted.  How can you not have gifs titled “headcanon accepted”?? ON TUMBLR. 

[snapes-many-buttons]

What if Snape’s mother wasn’t just good at Gobstones,

but all types of games? Maybe she was also good at Quidditch. She taught it to Snape because she hoped it would help her son make friends at school, including some moves she invented herself. But Snape was more interested in other things, though he would occasionally play some pick-up games with housemates. Imagine James watching Snape play and taking note of the cool new moves he does. Next thing you know, James is the big Quidditch hero and Snape never even knows his mother’s moves were stolen because he doesn’t bother to go to the games.

[mysnarkyslytherinsecret]

What if Snape’s dad was good at muggle sports like rugby and stuff? And he drags his son to the pub to listen to the games?And so Snape basically becomes the unofficial strategy advisor for Slytherin because even though he’s not really athletic, he brings the muggle brutality to Quidditch, which gives them an advantage because technically it’s not against the rules since its muggle tactics the Wizarding World has never seen.

And everyone in his House knows it’s him even though it’s supposed to be a secret (but it’s kept a secret from the other Houses, who are always a step behind), and this is the first reason for why Lucius Malfoy wants to introduce Severus to the Dark Lord.

And really, Severus could care less about Quidditch, but he’s finally able to gain positive notoriety in his House while also getting revenge by proxy on James Potter and Sirius Black.

And besides, it’s pretty much the only thing his good for nothing, drunken abuser of a father has ever done that has benefitted him in his entire life.

[mrs-sardonicus]

Oh.  So you mean, James copied Snape....? 

HEADCANON ACCEPTED. 

[liminy-lemony]

“don’t fuck with my james potter”

that’s the best part. i don’t have to. fucking with implies i have to makes things up, and i really don’t. he’s a predator, a jerk, an abuser, a rich entitled pureblood who enjoys the privilege of gryffindor’s good reputation and the protection of the headmaster and gets away with terrorizing the whole school.

don’t fuck with my potter how about you stop normalising abusive behaviour because your beautiful fave grinds your gears please and thank you

[enoughofyourshitblr]

[mrs-sardonicus]

Also, “my James Potter”. It’s their own idealized version of James they so adamantly have to hold onto. Because damn it sucks when people get complicated and you find out someone isn’t who you thought. 

[purplefictionlover]

It seems that they think that their headcanon! James is officially canon, not how James is officially presented in the books.

[mrs-sardonicus]

Oh, definitely.  This has been going on for years now, to the point they don’t know what’s “real” anymore. 

[parryhotterman]

No need to be so dramatic. Using those words aren't right. And misandry isn't real. The fact that you use those words and still have female followers is astounding to me. You can argue without using those words, in fact I challenge you to.

“And misandry isn’t real.”

Who wants to tackle this shit for me right now?  I don’t have the time for this shitty Greyface Anon fuckwad (oh hey look, I didn’t use “cunt”!) because I have to write an oh-so-misogynistic DQA about PETA’s fat shaming ads.

[mrs-sardonicus]

Well what can you say to that anyway, that just about says it all. 

DELUSIONAL. If they are that far-off on HARRY POTTER, why do we expect any different re. real life?

[paladins-light]

Here's a question

So we know that everyone who hates Severus claims that his memories that Harry sees in OotP are biased even though we know for a fact they are not. (And harry went snooping its not like severus was all “lol here check this out so you can sympathize me.”) does anyone ever question the memories he gave Harry in DH? Do people shout from rooftops that Severus made everything up as a final ditch effort to make Harry feel sorry for him even though he was dying? I donno because I don’t hang around maurder tags or snape hate tags because I’m not an asshole who ruins everyone’s good time by shitting on their favorite characters because I personally don’t like them.

[enoughofyourshitblr]

You know that people take into account only what they want…

[mrs-sardonicus]

Pretty sure I’ve seen that Snape wanted to make himself look like a hero and this was his way of complaining ...

[enoughofyourshitblr]

I can’t believe this idiot is still spewing this bullshit around, honestly, in canon it was never stated that James was a genius at potions, in pottermore potions is not even one of his skills. 

Guess who’s skill that is?

Of course they’ve blocked me because I’ve asked them canon proof of the shit they were talking about.

[nyx-aurora]

Yeah well, wasn’t this the person who linked some pro Snape blogs to her followers and told them to go “vomit over” them?

Classy person.

No big loss that you are blocked by such class.

[billowsandsmoke]

I’m pretty sure there’s like negative texual evidence that Snape stole his HPB ideas from James. Plus, when Slughorn comments on Harry’s potions ability, he says something along the lines of “oh yes, just like his mother” but makes no mention of James. (Though he does utter the words “why, not even Severus–” before scooping the poor kid out of the crowd. So although there’s evidence that Lily might have been better at potions than Snape, there’s nothing about James.) 

When in doubt, return to the text.

[nyx-aurora]

Haha, yes. So if James really was a “potions genius” then he slipped way, WAY under the radar there… so much so it… you know… it’s like he wasn’t even a potions genius at all? How odd?

But I honestly find it incredibly hard to fathom that anyone around that time was a better Potioneer than Severus. That was just his thing. I wish people would let him have at least something.

Blah.

[mrs-sardonicus]

Wwwwhhhere did this idiotic idea even come from?? wtf

[mrs-sardonicus]

Snape haters: OMG Snape chose to become a death eater

Me: " it is not our abilities that show us who we truly are it is our choices." So yeah he also chose to switch sides.

Snape: psh yeah but only because he was wanking over Lily

Me: so? Even if he was, he still chose to defect on his own, motivated by love. Ya know what everyone else was motivated by? Ringing a bell? Sirius says "i loved your dad" by extension Harry even though he hardly knows the kid. What difference does it make why? He stayed loyal til the end and without him everyone would have been fucked. I'm pretty sure that was kind of the point of the whole series, love conquers all. Because without this supposed creepy obsessed love Severus had for Lily, everyone would be fucking dead son.

Snape haters: but he called her a mudblood!

Me: yeah well shit happens when you're pissed off and humiliated

Snape Haters: unforgivable!!!!

Me: oh go suck an egg

Snape haters: hey leave our precious snowflake friend alone she's only 12 1/2 and went home crying about how mean you were to her. Stop using logic and quotes from the books

Me:....*looks at the screen like in the office*

[parryhotterman]

Is.. is your blog a joke? Honestly there is so much hate going on here take a chill pill

^^^ This is a subtle form of gaslighting and projection here, folks.Saying something/doing something shitty, then turning it around and blaming YOU for saying something/doing something shitty;  attempting to make it appear as though you’re the one who’s 100% to blame for the shit splattering from the fan.  Weaker minds would start doubting their sanity because of it, but I already know you fuckers are insane* to begin with (and have been put through such bullshit before with an abusive ex…like when she would SCREAM at me, call me names, threaten my life, and then turn it around to tell me that I was the one being abusive…).*OH NOEZ!  ABLEIST SLURS!  TRIGGERING!!11  Yeah, yeah, we keep hearing it, but repeating that shit isn’t going to make you any less dysfunctional.

[mrs-sardonicus]

This is like the Tumblr Harry Potter version of “Why are you hitting yourself?? Stop hitting yourself!” 

[greelin]

people saying negative things about a character you love that aren’t even constructive criticisms of their character or valid points and are just pointlessly and immaturely rude

[mugglenet]

[enoughofyourshitblr]

Two parts??? 😱

[mrs-sardonicus]

.... 

a play in two parts?  (not acts)

[thorkys-deactivated20171015]

90% of the time when I see a Snape debate I lose my faith in humanity and human intelligence.