A fandom-centric blog, focusing on fanfiction recommendations from multiple fandoms with a current emphasis on content from Check Please and The Witcher. Fandom interests may change over time. Will admit that he is a real librarian from Texas. Deaf, gay, unhealthy internet habits.
Things suck right now. Who wants to join me in making paper crane chains? You don't need any special tools or artistic talent, it gives you something to do with your hands, and you end up with a pretty chain of paper cranes that you can either hang up, or throw away without feeling too wasteful. And if you do join me, post pictures in the reblogs! :)
Tools you will need: needle and thread, a pad of post-it notes, and sharpies/markers/crayons/etc. of your choice.
You can design your post-it any way you like - you can even draw a picture or write out a text. I usually make a simple pattern with around 6 colors. Start by just drawing a pattern - it can be simple or detailed, random or symmetrical, cured or angled - then add each color, line by line, until you fill the post-it.
How to fold a paper crane: https://savingcranes.org/learn/origami-cranes/
Additional pictures and commentary from me below the cut (skip if you already know how to fold a paper crane).
When fold it into a triangle with the pattern face up (so that when you fold it, you're looking at the back of the post-it). Then, fold hotdog-style with the pattern face down (so that when you fold it, you're looking at the side that you colored).
If you are having trouble visualizing how to fold along all creases at once, start by unfolding the note and the gently folding partway along each crease - it should start to collapse in the right way.
When forming the kite shape, make sure the open sides of the square are at the bottom of the kite. The little triangle at the top of the kite is going to form the body of the crane. The part you are folding will become the wings, tail, and head, so you will need to be able to separate them.
This step - pulling the bottom corner up to the top corner to create a thin diamond - can be tricky the first times you do it. It can help to think about how what you are doing connects to the final crane. You are unfolding one side of the kite and then pulling the top - the loose portion - up to form a thin triangle. This will become the wing. The bottom portion of the diamond is going to become the head and tail.
Also make sure you only unfold and then refold each side individually. It can help to think of this as two symmetrical pieces of paper - a top and bottom - that are connected along the bottom and along the middle crease. Although they are connected, you need to fold each "piece" of paper separately. You can see in the second picture below how the part that you folded up to the top is going to become the wing.
Once you have repeated the process, you have two wings at the top of the diamond, and we will fold the bottom of the diamond into the neck and the tail.
If you are having difficulty forming the creases at this stage - especially because of the size of the post-it - you can use the edge of your marker to press firmly along the fold you want to crease.
Again, it can help to think about how what you are doing is connected to the final crane at this point. The bottom portions of the kite are the tail and the neck, but they need to separated from the wings so they can be flipped up. You are folding the wings in half so that the tail and neck lie flat, one on the bottom, one on top, facing you.
Once the tail and the neck have been flipped up, they need to be folded in half again to form two thin limbs, and the wings unfolded.
To pull the neck and the tail away from the wings, gently pull the top of the neck/tail away, then pinch at the bottom where they connect with the wings to form a crease. Finally, gently pull the wings away from each other, and the body should inflate to create a tiny crane! If you need to, you can gently press down in the center of the body to flatten it. If you want to, you can also shape the wings by pinching the edges or curling the tips up or down.
I have decided that I am going to make a crane "bead" curtain to cover the awkward little half-window that I never open. This will be frivolous and time-consuming and serve no purpose, other than the idea makes me happy.
A side effect of this project is that I am going to accidentally find out how many unique sharpies I own. (For each crane I used a different color to draw the initial design, and I am slowly cycling through my whole stock.)
1. blueskies-bluescreens on tumblr 2. death, virtual grief and your digital footprint 3. online status of a steam community user 4. my journal dot com 5. & 7. hacked-wtsdz on tumblr 6. STurner4077 on twitter 8. the new forms of mourning by julie alev dilmaç 9. all the ghosts in the machine: illusions of immortality in the digital age 10. unknown 11. fairycosmos on tumblr 12. researching death online
I feel like there’s needs to be, like, handbook for authors who post on Ao3 for effective metatext.
By metatext I mean like tagging, summary, and authors notes (especially initial authors notes at the beginning of a fic). The means by which we communicate to our readers what they’re getting into.
Because we kind of all have to learn it by osmosis and there are conventions but nobody’s really taught them at the start, so there’s inconsistencies and misunderstandings or people just not knowing things through no fault of their own.
This ends up breeding frustration and confusion and in the worst cases resentment, hurt, and aggression.
I’m severely tempted to make such a handbook and get it circulating.
For the people who are out there “fighting the good fight” and “trying to make fandom a better place,” I have two important questions for you:
1. Is the author dead? x
2. Is your baby in the bathwater? x
What do I mean by those things? Let’s start with #1. The Death of the Author is a type of literary criticism, the extreme cliff notes version of which is that art exists outside of the creator’s life, personal background, and even intentions. I’m using it slightly differently than Barthes intended, but that’s okay, because the author is dead and I’m interpreting his work through my own lens.
In fandom, the author is dead. In fact, the author was never alive in the first place, not really. The author has only ever been the idea of a person, because unlike published fiction, the only thing we know about a fanfic author is that which they choose to tell us about themselves.
Why is that important?
Because it might not be true. Hell, that happens in real life with published authors, who have SSN’s on file with their publishers, who pay taxes on the works they create and have researchable pasts. If the author of A Million Little Pieces could fake everything, why can’t I? Why can’t you? Why can’t the writer of your favorite fic in the whole wide world?
Stop me if you’ve heard this before: “you can only write about [sensitive subject] if [sensitive subject] has happened to you personally, otherwise you’re a disgusting monster that deserves to die!!” Or maybe “you can only write [x racial or ethnic group] characters if you’re [x racial or ethnic group] otherwise you’re racist/fetishizing/colonizing!”
You can play this game with any sensitive subject you can come up with. I’ve seen them all before, on a sliding scale of slightly chastising to literal death threats.
Now, I could tell you that I’m a white-passing Latina whose grandmother was an anchor baby. I could tell you that I speak only English because my family never taught me to speak Spanish, something which I’ve been told is common in the Cuban community, though I only know my own lived experience. I could tell you that I’m mostly neurotypical. I could tell you that I’m covered in surgical scars. I could tell you lots of things.
Are any of these true? Maybe! I could tell you that my brother has severe mental development problems, so uncommon that they’ve never been properly diagnosed, and that he will live the rest of his life in a group home with 24-hour care. Is that true? Am I allowed to write about families struggling with America’s piss-poor services for the handicapped now?
Am I allowed to write about being Cuban? After all, I did just say that I’m Cuban. But is it true? Can I instead write a character that’s Panamanian? Maybe I really am Panamanian, not Cuban. Maybe I’m both. Maybe I’m neither. Maybe I’m really French Canadian. Should we require people to post regular selfies? I can’t count the number of times I’ve had someone come up to me speaking Arabic, and I’ve been told that I look Syrian. What’s stopping me from making a blog that claims that I am Syrian? Can you even really tell someone’s race and ethnicity from a photo?
Am I allowed to write about being a teenager? Am I allowed to write about being a college student? Am I allowed to write about being an “adulty” adult? Can I write a character who’s 40? 50? 60? How old am I?
All of this is to say: you can’t base what someone is or is not “allowed” to write about on a background that may or may not be real. No matter how good your intentions. And I get it - this usually comes from a place of well-meaning. You’re trying to protect marginalized groups by stopping privileged people from trampling all over experiences that they haven’t suffered. I get that. It’s a very noble thought. But you can’t require a background check for every fic that you don’t like.
If you say “you can only write about rape if you’re a rape victim,” then one of three things will happen:
Real survivors will have to supply intimate details of their own violations to prevent harassment
Real survivors will refuse to engage and will then have to deal with death threats and people telling them to kill themselves for daring to write about their own experiences
People who aren’t survivors will say “yeah sure this happened to me” just to get people to shut up
Has that helped anyone? I mean really - anyone??
So now let’s get to point #2: is your baby in the bathwater?
If your intention is to protect marginalized people from being trampled upon, stop and assess if your boot is the one that’s now stamping on their face. Find your baby! Is your baby in the bathwater? Which is to say: find the goal that you’re advocating for. Now assess. Are you making the problem worse for the people you’re trying to protect? Does that rape victim really feel better, now that you’ve harassed and stalked them in the name of making rape victims feel safe?
Let’s say you read a fic that contains explicit sex between a 16 year old and a 17 year old. Is this okay? Would it be okay if the writer was 15? 16? 17? Should teenagers be barred from writing about their own lives, and should teenagers be banned from exploring sexuality in a fictional bubble, instead of hookup culture? Is it okay for a 20 year old to write about their experiences as a teenager? Is it okay for a 20 year old to write about being raped at a party as a teenager? Is it okay for a 30 year old? How about a 40 year old? Is it okay so long as it isn’t titillating? Is it okay if taking control of the narrative allows the writer to re-conceptualize their trauma as something they have control over? Is it okay if their therapist told them that writing is a safe creative outlet?
Is your author dead?
Is your baby in the bathwater?
Now let’s take a hardline approach: no fanfiction with characters who are under 18 years old. None. Is the 16 year old who really loves Harry Potter and wants to read/write about characters their own age better off? Should they be banned from writing? Should they be forced to exclusively read and write (adult) experiences that they haven’t lived? Will they write about teens anyway? Should they have to share it in secret? Should 16 year olds be ashamed of themselves? Should we just throw in with the evangelicals and say that the only answer is abstinence, both real and fictional?
Let’s say that no rape is allowed in fiction, at all. None. What happens to all the hurt/comfort fics where a character is raped and then receives the support and love that they deserve, slowly heal, and by the end have found themselves again? Are you helping rape victims by banning these stories? Are you helping rape victims by stripping their agency away, by telling them that their wants and their consent doesn’t matter?
Is your baby in the bathwater?
Fandom is currently being split in two: on one side, the people who want to make fandom a “safer” place by any means necessary, even if that means throwing out all of the marginalized groups they say they want to protect - and on the other, people who are saying “if you throw out that bathwater, you’re throwing the baby out too.”
The whole point of fandom is to be able to explore all kinds of ideas from the safety and comfort of a computer screen. You can read/write things that fascinate you, disgust you, titillate you, or make your heart feel warm. This is true of all fiction. People who want to read about rape and incest and extreme violence and torture can go pick up a copy of Game of Thrones from the bookstore whenever they want. Sanitizing fandom just means holding a community of people who are primarily not male, not straight, not cis, or some combination of those three, to higher and stricter standards than straight white cis male authors and creators all over the world.
There is nothing you can find on AO3 that you can’t find in a bookstore. Any teenager can go check out Lolita, or ASOIAF, or Flowers in the Attic, or Stephen King’s It, or Speak, or hundreds of other books that have adult themes or gratuitous violence or graphic sex. The difference is that AO3 has warnings and tags and allows people to interact only with the types of work that they want to, and allows people to curate their experiences.
Are these themes eligible to be explored, but only in the setting of something produced/published? Books, movies, television, studio art, music - all of these fields have huge barriers to entry, and they’re largely controlled by wealthy cishet white men. Is it better to say that only those who have the right connections to “make it” in these industries should be allowed to explore violence or sexuality or any other so-called “adult” theme?
Does banning women from writing MLM erotica make fan culture a better place?
Does banning queer people from writing about queer experiences make fan culture a better place?
Is M/M fic okay, but only if the author is male? What if he’s a transman? What if they’re NB? Who should get to draw those lines? Should TERFs get a vote? What if the author is a woman who feels more comfortable writing from a male character’s perspective because she’s grown up with male stories her whole life, or because she identifies more with male characters? What about all the transmen who discovered themselves, in part, by writing fanfiction, and realized that their desires to write male characters stemmed from something they hadn’t yet realized about themselves?
How can we ever be sure that the author is who they say they are?
Who is allowed to write these stories? How do we enforce it?
Is it better for none of these stories to ever exist at all?
1. Desktop browser extensions like AO3 Saviour [instructions here if you need them]
2. Public site skins available at archiveofourown.org/skins
This one shortens the individuals tags if they’re long/chatty: Freeform Tag Truncation for Blurbs
This one lets you set the number of lines of tags you want to see and puts any tags beyond that number of lines into a scrolly box: Shortening long tag fields
This one hides the Additional Tags: Blurblings Hide freeform tags
This one hides everything except the fic title, author, and fandom: Blurblings Hide nearly everything
3. My Preferences under the heading Display, you have the option to hide additional tags. If you want to reveal them, there’s a link that says “show additional tags” and it will, y’know, show the additional tags.
4. Create a site skin and block the individual works you want to avoid. [instructions here if you need them, including adding the block to a skin you’re already using]
5. Use Filters on your search and remove the author(s) that you don’t want to see
This is off the top of my head, so if you have more ways please do share them in the notes!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
OK, y’all, this is it. The alpha/beta/omega 43k fic featuring Jaskier and Many Witchers (specifically, Geralt, Eskel, Lambert, and Coen). It’s got:
non-traditional a/b/o dynamics
poly romance
witchers having low self-esteem
consensual use of Axii
Lambert insulting everyone
goats (not in a sexy way)
affectionate roasting of Geralt’s boyhood naïveté
smut that involves feelings
Vesemir being a long-suffering dad (again, not in a sexy way)
a magical performance-enhancing elixir
dicks
Plus, four, yes FOUR amazing pieces of artwork by the incomparable @jerry-of-rivia. I will squee about them individually when they’re posted on tumblr, but friends, they are GREAT. Please do enjoy them and give the artist some love.
It was wonderful working with @brighteyedjill for the Witcher Big Bang this year! As always, their work is layered with thoughtful explorations of intimacy, both sensual and sad.
This time, the lads are at wintering at Kaer Morhen, and you know what that means! Sex, so much sex. These boys are absolutely chock full of unresolved trauma and dicks, just as they should be.
When a humble bard, graced a ride along, with Geralt of Rivia, along came this song, friendship fraught with numerous opportunities for shenanigans. After all, it’s somewhat Jaskier’s fault that Geralt’s life became far more exciting than it really needed to be...
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this pairing although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. For more, please check my blog for my other recommendation lists for this pairing and other fandoms.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
there goes my heart beating (cause you are the reason) by Resacon1990
Canon Divergence // ~13k // PG-13
“Sometimes,” Geralt says quietly, “I forget that you care.”
Jaskier looks up surprised and sees that Geralt is looking down at him with a small frown on his face. “Geralt,” Jaskier sighs, shaking his head fondly, “you foolish beef-brain. Of course I care.”
Weak, My Love, and I Am Wanting by TabbyCat33098
Canon Divergence // ~2k // PG-13
Jaskier has written a lot of ballads about some woman who has stolen his heart. The thing is, he's been on the road with Geralt for the past month. He hasn't had any time to court a woman, much less have his heart broken by her. So who is this woman? The answer may shock you.
Chopsticks by thisgirlsays22
Music Instructor AU // ~12k // NC-17
“Yennefer sent me a check for eight lessons for you,” Jaskier said the following weekend, wearing a beige button-down with--
“Does your shirt have owls on it?” Geralt asked, caught somewhere between amusement and horror.
Jaskier looked down and tugged on the front of his shirt as if he had to remind himself what was on it. He beamed at Geralt. “Yeah! Do you like it?”
“Not particularly.”
The smile swiftly disappeared.
“It’s not terrible,” he amended, stepping back to let Jaskier inside the apartment. Then Jaskier’s initial words sank in. “Wait. Yen did what?”
Hanging up on Yennefer was always a mistake.
Keeping Crows by Castillon02
Canon Divergence // ~10k // PG-13
If it was some kind of weird religious thing, it was for a god Geralt had never heard of. Probably it was just a weird Jaskier thing. Crows, of all creatures! Corpse eaters. Grain stealers. No one liked crows. But Jaskier was voluntarily traveling with a Witcher; maybe he just had poor taste.
you're only brave in the moonlight (stay til sunrise) by SummerFrost for dis4daria
College Roommates AU // ~29k // NC-17
Falling in love with his roommate is, objectively, a bad idea—but most of the major decisions of Jaskier's life have been bad ideas, and they've gotten him this far.
This Life That We've Created by whisperedstory
Canon Divergence // Series // ~34k // NC-17
In the aftermath of what is probably the worst night of Jaskier's life, things start to change between him and Geralt and grow into something much deeper. There's nothing that could make Jaskier want to leave Geralt's side—and Geralt finally seems to be ready to accept that.
Idiots by fabrega
Canon Divergence // Series // ~5k // PG-13
"You're an idiot," Geralt says affectionately.
A Slowly Blooming Dream by Mahto
Magical Jaskier AU // ~12k // NC-17
Jaskier sees the world as it could be: full of beauty. He’s bright in the face of despair, and he spins tales of virtues long lost in the shadow of men’s hearts.
The world plays favourites.
Your Hand, Fixed In Mine by Sevent
Canon Divergence // ~4k // PG-13
Geralt ticks off a witch and gets cursed with holding Jaskier's hand until the end of time. Or at least until he realizes how to lift the curse.
b-sides and rarities by fathomfive
Canon Divergence // ~6k // PG-13
Some songs, Jaskier sings for Geralt only. Too bad it takes Geralt so long to notice.
Unintended Consequences by manic_intent
Post Canon // ~5k // NC-17
“You’ve got to wonder about the mentality of a group of people who’d come together, build a trading post on the Pontar within a forest full of monsters, pirates, and murderous elves, then triumphantly name the place ‘Flotsam’ with no sense of irony whatsoever,” Jaskier said.
When Geralt and Jaskier broke up, countless authors instantly hit their keyboards to write fix-it fic in which they make up and make out: the power of fanfiction, y’all. Fanfiction serves to transform canon, to extend it and manipulate it. It can provide a variety of solutions to that unfortunate mountain incident, to the pesky issue of Jaskier aging, and more. Never doubt the creativity of an entire fandom.
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this pairing although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
To Pay and To Purloin by Star_flaming
Canon Divergence // ~6k // R
The town of Dalnacreich had a curse upon its wells, and Geralt was more than confident he could get the Good Neighbor who lay it to remove it in turn. As to the price he must pay, that was a little more up in the air, and not for lack of Jaskier's attempts to pin it down.
The god of scraped knees. by spqr
Sorcerer AU // ~8k // R
Jaskier’s been pretending to be human for so long now that he hardly remembers what it feels like to be a sorcerer. He doesn’t want to remember what it feels like to be a sorcerer. But people still murmur his name with reverence in certain dim halls; Dandelion, Dandelion, destroyer of worlds.
Rosemary for memory by Kaiyo_no_Hime
Hanahaki Trope // ~13k // Unrated
Jaskier comes to terms with his life after finding he is suffering from the courtly disease, hanahaki. He wants nothing more than to spend the rest of his days singing sweet odes to his beloved Witcher.
So, when their paths cross again, he is happy to rejoin the stoic man and silently suffer his final days in his presence.
Rivers Run by DancingLassie
Deity AU // Series // WIP // ~80k // NC-17
Jaskier's start in life was unfortunate, but sadly not unheard of. He was put in a sack, less than an hour old, and chucked in the river. For many in his position that would of been the end of it, but the Yaruga heard his cut off wail and swept him into her loving embrace.
Less than an hour old and Jaskier had already died and been reborn as the newest child of Mama Yaruga.
Sometimes a Hammer, Sometimes a Lockpick by madsthenerdygirl
Canon Divergence // ~6k // PG-13
Geralt's been in a dungeon for two weeks and is understandably frustrated. Jaskier, on the other hand, is what one might call... livid.
of bards and witches and witchers by WriteThroughTheNight
Yennefer & Jaskier Siblings AU // Series // ~18k // PG-13
When Jaskier was four, he slipped his mother’s watch and went to the field to gather a bouquet of dandelions. He climbed back into the yard, as stealthy as a child really cared to be, and crept over to the barn. In the barn, lived a secret. (The man he thought his father said the secret was a monster, a plague. His mother said the secret was his sister.)
OR
Jaskier comes from a far humbler background, and would really like to know why Yennefer never came back for her youngest brother.
Somebody To Love by kathkin
Cupid AU // ~24k // NC-17
This was far from the first time someone had wanted Geralt. This wasn’t the first time it was someone Geralt wanted back. And this time, it was good. It would be a good match. But his gut said no. A good match wasn’t enough. Geralt deserved – needed better than that. He deserved glorious – passionate – spectacular love. That was what he wanted, for Geralt.
Songbird Sorrows by Kaz_Langston
Canon Divergence // ~18k // NC-17
Six months after the mountain, and the end of their twenty year partnership, Jaskier finally tries to move on. Unfortunately, his paramour’s sister isn’t having any of it. When Geralt arrives, he finds a bard who won’t even acknowledge his existence, and though his apology seems to go down well enough there’s definitely still something wrong.
Bite Marks by vestigialstell
Vampire AU // ~13k // NC-17
Geralt is half-man, half-monster. Jaskier gets along with him just fine because, after all, Jaskier isn’t all human either.
Don't Look a Gift Goblin in the Mouth by SummerFrost
Different First Meeting // ~3k // G
“No, I’m serious, I really do have like, uh—a goblin… thing… in my house!” Jaskier insists. “Will you come take a look at it? I don’t want it to, I don’t know, eat my liver or something?”
Geralt massages at his temple. “Very few monsters are that picky. It would probably just eat all of you.”
Of Nowhere by didoandis
Canon Divergence // ~11k // NC-17
“Everyone’s from somewhere,” Ciri says. “I’m from Cintra, even though no one can know it, and Geralt’s from Rivia, and Yennefer’s from Vengerberg. So where are you from?”
“Nowhere,” Jaskier says, and his tone has just enough of a snap to it, an edge she’s not heard before, that she decides to leave it be.
It turns out that where Jaskier’s from, they’re not that happy to see him. Until they realise he could be worth something...
A grumpy witcher meets a gregarious bard: opposites attract, destiny intervenes. Their friendship spans literal decades, fertile grounds for ample amounts of fanfiction to take root in. The tales of Geralt and Jaskier has it all: joyful meetings, heroics, drama, japery, heartbreak, and sorrowful partings. Just how many songs can a bard make from that?
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this pairing although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists in the future and may do so for other fandoms. Please check my blog for other recommendation lists.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
Food of Love by tanktrilby
Canon Divergence // ~22k // PG-13
I brought a dead princess back to life through the power of song is the kind of thing that would have got an eyebrow raise even from the stone-faced Geralt of Rivia, so it's a good thing he and Geralt will probably never see each other again.
you follow? by shortcrust
Modern AU // Series // ~3k // PG-13
Did @bardofficial win a Grammy? No. But he DID put his husband in a leather tunic for the red carpet and in that sense, we’re all winners tonight
and yet so far from death by SummerFrost
Ghost AU // ~31k // NC-17
"Your song about the ghost, then," Maja asks warily. "It's just metaphorical, right?"
"Yes, of course, absolutely metaphorical," Jaskier brightly assures her. "No ghosts here."
Jaskier's favorite painting falls to the ground.
"Bollocks."
New Monster Stories by kathkin
Urban Fantasy AU // ~20k // NC-17
“So do you have a name?”
“Yeah.” The man who had saved his life less than an hour ago – the white-haired, absurdly buff, weirdly sexy man Jaskier might have called taciturn if he was feeling charitable and surly if he was feeling less so – dug into his second burger.
Jaskier waited. “Are… you going to tell me what it is?”
The man paused mid-bite, and looked at him reproachfully as if to say how dare you. How dare you interrupt me. Can’t you see I’m enjoying my cheeseburger. Can’t you see this cheeseburger is the most important thing in my life right at the moment. He swallowed, and said, “Geralt.”
Love as You Are by thisgirlsays22
Soulmates AU // ~16k // NC-17
Jaskier didn’t want to marry just any noblewoman--no matter how comely she may be--he wanted adventure and many loves, but most importantly his biggest, greatest love of all.
He is not expecting that love to be in the form of a brooding stranger sitting at the back of a tavern.
In one instant his breath catches in his throat at the beauty of the man before him and in the next, there’s a burning sensation on the bottom of his heel as his mark makes itself known. It’s pain and pleasure knotted together, roses surrounded by thorns.
A Dandelion By Any Other Name by TabbyCat33098
Hanahaki Trope // ~4k // G
Jaskier is throwing up flowers and refuses to tell Geralt who has afflicted him so. As Geralt grapples with Jaskier's impending death, he comes to terms with a few things himself.
home is nowhere, therefore you by Ark
Canon Divergence // ~18k // NC-17
"Right, well," Jaskier says, when he halts before Geralt. Up close, he looks much more nervous. There is sweat on his brow and his collar is damp with it, and his teeth keep catching on his lower lip. "True love's kiss. There's—ah—there's nothing to it." And he bends, the utter imbecile, and kisses Geralt full on the mouth.
spring, summer, spring by yogurtgun
Canon Divergence // ~32k // NC-17
After spending a treacherous winter together, Jaskier and Geralt make an arrangement: they travel together for three seasons before Jaskier finds a town or a court to winter over until spring. However, this year Geralt meets Jaskier a little earlier than expected, during Imbaelk. Between holiday celebrations, solstices and plum schnapps, Geralt falls in love and loses his way.
Nisraea by spqr
Soulmates AU // ~4k // R
Jaskier's seventeen when he pulls the Witcher from the fire.
He has no idea, at the time, that it's a magical fire.
500 Crowns by vands88
Canon Divergence // ~9k // R
Every year, Jaskier finds himself singing at Cintra’s court, watching Geralt’s abandoned Child Surprise grow up.
Skin Deep by sospes
Canon Divergence // ~8k // PG-13
“What’s that?” Geralt asks.
Jaskier blinks. “It’s a tattoo,” he says. “Have you never seen a tattoo before, Geralt?”
Geralt fights the urge to roll his eyes. “I know it’s a tattoo,” he says. “What’s it a tattoo of?”
The Sevenfold Path by Star_flaming
Canon Divergence // ~17k // G
Geralt had known Jaskier studied at Oxenfurt University, but he had thought of it as a sort of formal music education. It was becoming abundantly clear that while he had indeed studied music and composition, he also knew a lot more than Geralt had ever learned. And it was impressive. And humbling, too.
to render it transparent by theundiagnosable
Time Travel AU // ~24k // NC-17
Geralt wakes up warm, peaceful, and utterly content, which is how he knows that something is severely wrong.
Time Again by didoandis
Age Regression // ~17k // NC-17
Things you need to know:
It’s 1264. You seem to be losing your memory. Also Geralt likes you now.
Jaskier’s losing time. Geralt’s not sure he can live through the last two decades again, especially not backwards.
A Blessing, A Curse by aileenrose
Canon Divergence // ~12k // NC-17
"For a while, Jaskier doesn’t know he’s cursed. It feels like free will, going back down that mountain, just as dangerous down as the way up, and alone this time, too. The descent is fast, maybe even reckless, but Jaskier’s feeling numb and out-of-sorts anyways, Geralt’s words simmering in his mind, and at the time it doesn’t feel like he’s being pulled on by anything but his own desire to get away."
No single recommendation list can possibly contain all the fanfiction I’d recommend for this pairing... so here’s a followup for the ever so popular Nursey and Dex pairing! You can find my other recommendations for this pairing and the fandom by looking in the tags on my blog.
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this pairing although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists for this fandom, although I may branch out to other fandoms later on.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
fly towards a secret sky by growlery writes
Canon Divergence // ~5k // PG-13
Dex snorts, but it doesn't sound mean. None of the guys are, like, bad about the Muslim thing. There was always a place for him to pray at the Haus, before he moved in, and no one asks him to go to lunch on a Friday, and he never gets interrogated when he’s drinking (or not drinking) at a party. They can be weird, though, like that time someone brought up Nazem Kadri's suspension with him even though Nursey's ambivalent at best towards the Leafs.
Dex has never been weird. There's a billion points of tension between them, but this isn't one of them.
The Scarf by rhysiana
Magic AU // ~8k // PG-13
College, Dex was finding, was both harder and easier to navigate than he’d anticipated. Classes and hockey practice he’d expected, and he mostly had a handle on those. But all the interpersonal stuff was… difficult.
Shitty thought it was because he was from a small town. Ransom thought it was because he was the first person in his family to go to college. Holster thought it was because Dex joined him in his hatred of 90% of the population. Chowder thought it was because Dex was stressed out. Nursey just thought it was because he was a conservative asshole.
Shockingly, none of them ever thought to guess it was because he was a witch living with people who didn’t know for the first time.
Crushcrushcrush by loveandallthat
Canon Divergence // ~5k // PG-13
It’s not Dex’s fault that his teammates are really, really good-looking, and also kind of amazing. But it makes it much harder to convince Nursey that what he feels for him is on a different level.
It's (not) You by unacaritafeliz
Soulmates AU // ~9k // PG-13
"It could still be a coincidence though," says Nursey, pressing his own thumb against the mark. "It doesn't have to be you."
"Nursey..." starts Dex. He's trying to sound soft, but he probably just sounds broken. He feels broken. "Nursey, of course it's me."
light's off, light's on (you were the right one) by jennycaakes
Post Canon // ~9k // PG-13
“This,” Nursey said, gesturing around them vaguely, “is the year that you fall in love with me.”
He expected Dex’s face to crack with a smile, or another roll of his eyes so sharp it could easily be written off, but neither of those things happened. Dex maintained his easy gaze, staring into Nursey’s eyes like he was looking for something.
“Won’t take much,” he murmured.
wasted on you by torkz
Canon Divergence // ~20k // R
Derek Nurse thinks that if he never falls in love with another redheaded asshole named William, it’ll be too soon.
Crossed Wires by lecrivaineanonyme
Dex Doesn’t Attend Samwell AU // ~15k // PG-13
Will snorts. "You are unreal,” he says, shaking his head. “I’ve had people in here crying because they downloaded a virus that can be removed in two minutes, and here you are with pie-filling in your computer, joking about how at least you didn’t fucking put rice in it.”
Derek grins. “It’s chill,” he replies, scratching the back of his neck. “Why worry? I know you got my back.”
Also known as the one where Nursey is constantly fucking up his laptop and Dex is the lucky Best Buy employee who gets to fix it.
see you flexin' that's a big lie by jennycaakes
Canon Divergence // ~33k // R
“I--what?” Nursey only said half of that shit to piss him off but he’s too confused to take a jab at him. “What are you saying?”
“We’ll tell people we’re dating,” Nursey says. “The team’ll know it’s not real. But word’ll spread. People’ll lay off. Give you your space.”
Dex forces himself to swallow. “Sorry. You want me. To… fake date you?”
get with it by dharmainitiative
Actors AU // ~6k // PG-13
The world knows a lot about Derek Malik Nurse. They know that he graduated at the top of his class from Harvard, that he has an affinity for poetry, and that he’s one of the leads of Northanger, the #1 cable drama in the nation, which has garnered him instant fame and heartthrob status.
What the world doesn’t know about Derek is that he’s a huge pain in William Poindexter’s ass.
In Another Life by alocalband
Magical Realism // ~21k // R
Dex goes to bed his first night in the basement and wakes up in a slightly altered version of reality for the day.
A few nights later, it happens again. And again. And again...
Which is fine. Really. He will handle this insanity the same way he’s handled every other weirdness Samwell has thrown at him since he got here.
He’s just not sure how to deal with the implications of how often he wakes up in worlds where Nursey is in bed beside him.
things you said by quidhitch
Canon Divergence // ~6k // PG-13
“Awww, looks like Dex appreciates a lady in uniform,” Nursey teases, tucking his feet a little further beneath Dex’s thighs. “You have a thing with the head cheerleader back in high school Dexy? Hold her pom poms and kiss her whatnot?”
Dex seems to be contemplating something, and Nursey figures it’s one of his lame clapbacks like your mom’s a pom pom. He brings the bottle to his mouth, smiling around the lip of it.
“Actually, I’m more of a captain of the football team kinda guy.”
Nursey chokes on his beer.
in front of the same small bathroom mirror by shellybelle
Canon Divergence // ~12k // PG-13
It's not surprising that sharing a room changes things, but neither of them expect the most important conversations in their strange, awkward friendship to happen in their shared bathroom.
(Or: five conversations Dex and Nursey have in a shared bathroom, and one in bed.)
Obviously I couldn’t put all of my favorites into a single list: it would be a mile long if I had all the time in the world. So, here’s another rec list for Bitty and Jack!
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this pairing although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog. The previous recommendation list for this pairing can be found here.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
Know That I Can Be Frustrating (Promise You My Touch Will Explain) by milou407
Soulmates AU // ~14k // PG-13
When skin-to-skin contact reveals the depth of feeling between two people and the potential that exists between them, people will generally react in one of two ways.
Some will wear their hearts openly, colors patterning their skin like an open book. Others will close themselves off, let only very few people leave a mark on their skin and, by extension, their lives.
You’d think it would be easy to figure out where on this spectrum Jack Zimmermann and Eric Bittle fall.
You might be surprised.
I'm sorry I said I wanted you dead by Thunderhel
Jack Didn’t Go to Samwell AU // ~9k // PG
Bitty says he would kill Jack Zimmermann, and Jack Zimmermann hits him in the face with a puck.
The two instances are unrelated.
you’ve got my number by ambrosius
Jack Didn’t Go to Samwell AU // ~10k // PG-13
It’s not as if Jack was totally inept when it came to technology. He could handle his Tweeter (Tweety? Twits? Twitter? Did it really matter?) just fine and if he’s honest, he much preferred texting to calling most days. So when he gets added to a group chat full of strangers, well, he’s pretty sure he can handle whatever comes next.
52 Hertz by onawingandaswear
Bitty Joins NHL AU // ~21k // R
In which Jack doesn't find the courage to confess his love at graduation and Bitty only complicates things by becoming the first out player in the NHL.
I Can Live Without You by neversleepingagain
Canon Divergence // ~21k // R
When Jack Zimmermann kisses Eric Bittle after graduation, Eric spends two months thinking that it was the beginning of his happy ending. When it falls apart, he spends the next two years avoiding Jack and then, at the first opportunity, he moves to Seattle, putting an entire country between them. Unfortunately, he has no contingency plan for when Jack gets traded to the Seattle Schooners three years later.
the road leads back to you by heyfightme
Jack Didn’t Go to Samwell AU // ~56k // R
The spare key is under the mat, just like Poots said it would be. Hefting his carefully-curated care package under one arm, Jack wrestles with the key in the lock before tucking it safely back into its hiding spot. He shuts the door quickly behind himself, and is toeing out of his shoes when a voice echoes out from somewhere.
“Sweetheart, you’re home!”
Jack Zimmermann is an established hockey player. He’s three years in to his NHL career, has had the A for the Falconers for two and a half, and is ready to make winners out of the new group of rookies. He pulls one under his wing, affectionately nicknamed Poots, and it should all go as planned. But say Jack accidentally discovers that Poots has a boyfriend. And say that Poots wasn’t a very good boyfriend. And say, for arguments’ sake, Poots’ boyfriend definitely deserved better.
Jack is maybe, possibly, totally fucked.
Well and Truly by YourPalYourBuddy
Canon Divergence // ~3k // PG
Brandon starts talking before their professor finishes opening the floor for comments. “Like, is this a joke? It’s focused on that blond guy again. He’s, like, the only point of stillness in the room, it feels like the camera rests on him like it’s comfortable looking at him. It’s sort of in love with him, isn’t it?”
Jack — Jack can’t think about that right now. Or, okay, yes, he likes looking at Bitty. Bitty’s easy to look at. And he’s not always as still as he is in the picture, but that’s because here he’s smiling at his phone while he tweets something about the scores to his followers, and okay, everyone else is in an uproar and yes Bitty’s in focus if not in center like the camera’s directing eyes to him, and—
He knew it already, but he’s fucked. Well and truly.
if you're going through hell (keep going) by onawingandaswear
Bitty’s Haunting Faber AU // ~12k // Unrated
Eighteen years ago, Samwell suffered the tragic loss of one of its most promising young athletes. Ever since, rumors have circulated that the school is haunted by the ghost of Eric Bittle. At least, that’s the only way anyone can seem to explain why the locker rooms smell like freshly baked apple pie on game days instead of the usual, omnipresent hockey funk.
Now, in the twilight of his career, Jack Zimmermann is facing his own mortality and the last item on his bucket list: return to Samwell and disprove the rumor that his long-dead boyfriend is haunting Faber Memorial Rink.
The Utterances of Storms by RC_McLachlan
Canon Divergence // ~3k // G
Aided by an explosion of sound, Bittle soars.
Or, the one in which Bitty does a full figure skating routine and everyone loses their minds over how damn good he is.
Is it too soon to do this yet? by PorcupineGirl
Bitty Joins NHL AU // ~13k // PG-13
Jack had first heard of Eric Bittle when he became the first out NCAA men's hockey captain. Then Bittle signed with Toronto, becoming the first out NHL player. That's how Jack met him.
Now he's being traded to the Falconers, which means that he and Jack need to have a conversation. Because they've done a lot more than meet since then.
Hot Off the Press by Fictionalcasualties
Reporter AU // ~4k // PG-13
Eric Bittle is a genius reporter with top-notch credentials and Jack is the professional hockey player Bitty sticks up for when people ask invasive questions that have nothing to do with hockey.
All I Want is You by RabbitRunnah
Soulmates AU // ~6k // PG-13
On Jack Zimmermann’s 16th birthday, his parents have The Talk with him over cake and coffee.
He’s known it’s coming, of course. Everyone knows that 16 is the magic year, the year you’re finally able to watch your soulmate video. Jack is ambivalent about the milestone. He has classmates and teammates who found out right away, which just seems silly. He doesn’t know why he needs to do this now. It’s not like he’s going to marry his soulmate tomorrow.
Lysistrata? I Hardly Know Her! by tomato_greens
Canon Divergence // ~15k // NC-17
Sometimes you can’t get what you want until you can’t get what you want.
not a second too late late by spraycansoul
Celebrity AU // ~7k // PG-13
In his twenty-seven years of life, Eric Bittle never thought he’d achieve the level of fame required to guest-host a late night talk show. Of course, he’d also never envisioned himself in the guest dressing room of said late night talk show, making out with a professional hockey player he’s slated to interview in twenty minutes.
And yet.
The Greatest Thing by writingonpostcards
Different First Meeting AU // ~18k // PG-13
Bitty and Jack meet at a party and hit it off, but when Bitty finds out Jack is Jack Zimmermann, captain of the Providence Falconers, he doubts anything will happen between them. Jack proves him wrong, but the reality of dating an NHL player during playoff season puts pressure on their new relationship.
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
I wrote a little thing. Just a tiny thing. It’s very unfortunate that I couldn’t just stick to reading fanfiction. Nooo, I just had to write one myself. Anyways, Dex has feelings about captaincy and then, I made him have feelings about Nursey too. I only wrote this for the punchline to be honest!
This list is dedicated to the rare pairings in this fandom, celebrating ships such as Holster and Bitty or Shitty and Jack. Some of these pairings may even surprise you! These rare pairings epitomize the possibilities of fandom and its creativity, something worth treasuring.
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature rare pairings although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
make you laugh by orphan_account
Bitty/Holster // ~3k // PG-13
He doesn’t know how Holster manages to be so friendly about offering.
quote unquote boyfriend by orphan_account
Bitty/Holster // ~7k // PG-13
A month after Bitty came out, his mother asked, as casually as she could, if he was seeing anyone. He couldn’t believe that this was a question he didn’t have to be afraid of anymore, and that after so many years of saying no, no, not seeing anyone, as if he were some kind of failure, he could finally say something.
He blurted out, “Yes,” because he’d started hooking up with Holster week before last.
Bend Me, Shape Me (Any Way You Want Me) by sysrae
Nursey/Ransom // ~5k // NC-17
“Your type,” Nursey repeats. His arm is a warm line against Ransom’s own, pressed close in the night air. “You said Holster doesn’t do it for you, so what are you after?”
Ransom smiles, pulse quickening as he lifts a hand and gently grips Nursey’s chin, thumb smoothing across his plush lower lip. He leans in, his other hand on Nursey’s knee, and moves his mouth to Nursey’s ear. Low and rough, he murmurs, “Guys who know how to dance, what they want and when to move on it. That’s my type.”
we call this fixer upper home by the_one_that_fell
Bitty/Shitty/Jack // ~30k // NC-17
It starts with Bitty assuming Lardo is a 6-foot-tall white dude and ends with something beautiful.
The Cost of Emotion by alpha_exodus
Bitty/Johnson // ~2k // R
Sometimes Bitty doesn’t understand what Johnson is saying, but Johnson always looks at him with a kind smile and Bitty can’t help liking him for that.
Secondary by Thunderhel
Lardo/Johnson // ~3k // PG-13
“I feel like I don’t even know myself, you know? Like that sketch I told you about. Like…Like God or the universe or whatever had this idea of what I’m supposed to be and then they just…never filled it in. And now I’ve gotta fill it in myself and that’s bullshit.” She rubbed at her eyes before parting her fingers again. “Do you ever feel that way? Or am I just going insane?”
Johnson moved in what may have been a shrug. “I think that’s fairly common. Especially with secondary characters, like there’s a plot and an end game and you’re a part of it but you’re not the focus so all your details tend to get a little fuzzy beyond the basics.”
Lardo blinked hard, it felt like she hadn’t done that in a while. After a moment of deliberation she sat back up on her elbows to look at him. “I’m a secondary character?”
only a simple fool by blamefincham
Chowder/Nursey/Dex // ~6k // PG-13
Dex had been wishing that the universe would save them from this horribly awkward conversation, and as if it’s answering his prayers, Chowder’s garbage bag chooses that moment to split wide open.
“Oh—oh no,” Chowder says despairingly, sinking to his knees to start collecting the garbage. Dex joins him, but then he notices that everything he’s collecting is wrappers: takeaway containers, fast food bags, the occasional TV dinner box…
“Chowder, do you eat, like, any actual food?” Dex can’t stop himself from saying.
Alexis Jacquelyn by Thunderhel
Bitty/Tater/Jack // ~12k // PG-13
Jack and Tater are unstoppable duo, both on and off the ice. There is absolutely nothing that can come between the two of them, nothing at all, except maybe a very cute new intern, a year of indecision, and a cat named after themselves.
Muse by the_one_that_fell
Bitty/Nursey // ~3k // PG-13
Nursey needs a muse for his writing assignment; he doesn’t expect to find more than that in Bitty.
two weeks by justlikeswitchblades
Bitty/Ransom // ~2k // PG-13
The Haus attic gets a little chilly in winter, but it’s not so bad when Ransom has Bitty by his side.
after the raven has had his say by halfabreath
Holster/Jack, Bitty/Ransom // Series // ~20k // Various
Adam plays the FRIENDS theme song in the truck on their way to the market in retaliation, because sometimes that’s all you can do when your boyfriend is thoughtful and doles out crucial financial advice to keep your dairy cows from wandering away.
honey, i’d put money on myself by wrishwrosh
Tater/Ransom // ~3k // PG-13
Ransom is pretty sure he just ascended. He has left his body behind and moved on to a better place and he must now be in heaven, receiving his eternal rewards for the week Holster spoke only in Michael Scott quotes, because Alexei Mashkov is standing in the doorway of the Haus holding a tray of deluxe nachos from Jerry’s.
Talk It Through For Me by psocoptera
Ransom/Dex // ~2k // PG-13
“Hey,” Ransom says, “Come sit with me at my table, maybe we can figure it out.”
Lonely Hearts Club by orphan_account
Bitty/Holster // ~3k // PG-13
“Okay, that’s completely different!” Holster argues, sounding offended, “Justin Oluransi is a kind and gentle soul who has never done anything to anyone and who snores like a puppy when he sleeps. Jack is…”
Holster trails off. Bitty bumps his shoulder.
“Jealous of Jack?” He asks playfully, and Holster laughs loudly.
“Obviously.” he replies, “You’re a catch and Jack doesn’t deserve you. C’mere–”
trespass by applecrumbledore
Holster/Jack // ~6k // R
It’s a party, so if Holster were talking to one of the boys, he’d ask him to play beer pong, and if it were a potential hook-up, he’d see if he wanted to dance, but Jack is somewhere in between.
I’m On Fire by motorghosts
Shitty/Jack // ~15k // NC-17
“This repressed, rich, white, cis-male victim of modern masculinity conventions…this was Knight’s white whale.”
Slice-of-life trek through Jack and Shitty’s blossoming friendship with just a splash of bro-on-bro.
Bitty and Jack is a love story for the ages, but what if you added one Kent Parson into the mix? You get pining threefold, polyamory negotiations, redemption arcs, a whole lot of sass, and one very full bed. Let’s be real: we all crave a good PB&J sandwich from time to time. Why should this be any different? This way, everyone gets a happy ending... in more ways than one.
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this trio although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are listed in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
The View From the Bench by FestiveFerret
Canon Divergence // ~20k // PG-13
When Bitty overhears a conversation between Jack and Kent Parson at the Epikegster, he goes out and talks to Kent afterwards. The next morning, he discovers an unexpected consequence of unsolicited advice.
not what it looks like by halfdesertedstreets
Neighbors AU // ~13k // PG-13
Despite how it may look from an outsider’s perspective, it’s not as if Bitty planned to fake-date his actual crush in order to help said crush avoid making things awkward with his ex, who he may or may not still have feelings for.
It just…sort of happened.
(…though to be fair to Kent, Bitty is kind of the one who started it.)
(Love Is) Gonna Keep Us Tied by psocoptera
Magical Stanley Cup // ~6k // PG-3
"You what?" Jack says into the phone.
"I'm stuck to the Stanley Cup," Kent says again. "Really."
Infinity, Plus One by SummerFrost
Kent Goes to Samwell AU // ~75k // NC-17
Eric Bittle hoped to find a lot of things at Samwell University, but being caught in the cross-fire between his surly captain, Jack Zimmermann, and his friendly-but-moody alternate captain, Kent Parson, was certainly not one of them.
the stranger the better by hockeydyke
AU // ~3k // PG-13
Kent’s had a bad day and he figures date night with Bitty will improve his mood. But when Bitty watches a hot stranger get stood up, he decides to invite the man over to join him and Kent for the night. The only problem?
Kent knows the guy. Intimately.
taste the sting a second time by quietest_one
Soulmates AU // ~2k // PG-13
Kent is eight years old when his words come in, like a bruise in reverse, darkening from bile yellow to blotchy purple to stark black: ‘Hi there. Good game.’
red in tooth and claw by halfdesertedstreets
Daemons AU // ~74k // NC-17
It says something about Jack that his Isolde didn’t settle until he was seventeen years old. It says more that when she finally did settle, she ended up being—well, you know—
—a badger.
only loving in the cover of the moon by AugustaByron
Werewolves AU // ~16k // NC-17
Look, Kent just wanted to come talk to Zimms. He's not looking for some mythical fated mating bond with Eric Bittle.
touchy subject by applecrumbledore
Canon Divergence // ~50k // NC-17
Bitty finds a photo booth strip and almost doesn't recognize Jack because he's not sure he's ever seen him grin off-ice before, and his hair is so long it curls around his ears, and he's so, so young. It takes Bitty a few long seconds to realize the boy he's kissing is Kent Parson, with the same backwards cap and everything.
sundown starts at half-past six by halfdesertedstreets
Practical Magic AU // ~62k // NC-17
“My true love will have hair the color of yellow apples,” and Jack Zimmermann will take a bite from the forbidden fruit, juice running down his chin. “My true love will be exactly five feet and six-and-a-half inches tall,” and he will chew a leaf from a tree of that same height. “My true love will be as sweet as sugar and sharp as lemon,” and he will drink half a glass of Great-Aunt Cathy’s lemonade, waiting until the last dregs of sugar hit his tongue. “And if a single one of these things is not to be, then let it be known—my true love shall not be he.”
(He knows in his bones that this spell won’t ever come true. After all, his true love isn't real, and if he’s not real, then the curse can’t take him. That’s the whole point.)
Every Day I Have His Heart (The Viva Las Vegas Remix) by Lady_Ganesh
AU // ~4k // PG-13
In another universe, Kent Parson buries his teammate and boyfriend the year he gets drafted. In another universe, Jack and Bitty get married and never talk to Kent Parson again.
The universe Kent knows is different.
Petty Coincidences by SummerFrost
Soulmates AU // ~4k // PG-13
The first words your soulmate speaks to you are written on your body, but that doesn't mean fate isn't still a little slippery. So Jack clings to coincidences, Kent despises them, and Bitty isn't sure they exist.
What’s better than one blond? Two blonds. Face it, this ship is ripe for conflict considering both of them have feelings for Jack and as we all know, conflict brings forth fanfic. How it happens is always different but one way or another, they get together without Jack. (Sometimes Jack just doesn’t exist. Sometimes they both get with Jack, but that’s for another time.)
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this couple although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
A Dash of Stardust in the Morning by dieofthatroar
Magic AU // ~33k // NC-17
“You’re—you’re Eric, right? Eric Bittle?”
“Call me Bitty,” he says. His eyes slip from Kent and trail out behind him into the snow-covered yard.
“Sure. I’m here because—”
“I can see why you’re here,” Bitty says, looking over Kent’s shoulder. Kent turns, knowing what he’ll see, but not believing that Bitty can see it too.
There, two feet from the passenger’s seat of the rental car is the flickering image of a boy. He’s made of silver and shadows, like what’s left after the light passes through a stained-glass window—the color drained out, a dullness in his breast. He’s eighteen and will always be eighteen, just like Kent has seen him every single day since the draft more than six years ago. The ghost of Jack Zimmermann.
Smitten by Pinkerton
Cat Sitter AU // ~11k // PG-13
Google searches conducted during Bitty’s first night as Kent Parson's cat sitter:
Cat meowing a lot good or bad
Cat stopped meowing good or bad
Cats on balcony safe
How to get cat off balcony
Cat bites dangerous
Where the heck do pro athletes hide the neosporin???????????
Moving cat off lap without getting scratched
Cute cat videos
How to win at cat videos
Perfect Strangers by SummerFrost
Canon Divergence // ~13k // NC-17
Bitty never imagined he'd be pouring out secrets to Kent Parson, but here he is: curled up on the couch like it's housing his confessional, caught up in that strange late-night energy that makes honesty feel almost easy.
Team USA by MaraMcGregor
Olympian AU // ~6k // NC-17
Eric and Kent met during the Sochi Olympics. Kent had intended to talk Jack into signing with the Aces at Epikegster, but his plans get derailed when he sees Eric at the party.
Essentially a redo of Epikegster if Eric was still a figure skater, knew Kent, and completely changed the outcome of the party.
Call Off the Dawn by SummerFrost
After Samwell AU // ~8k // PG-13
"Do you think this is happening because we're really terrible people?" Bitty asks. "Like, fundamentally?"
"Speak for yourself," says Kent. "I went to therapy for that shit."
Or: Bitty and Kent accidentally ruin a wedding.
Player 15 by eden22
Bitty Joins NHL AU // ~20k // NC-17
A list of things that Kent Parson definitely isn't:
1. He definitely isn't worried that the Aces just drafted Eric Bittle because he's a younger, faster version of Kent
2. He definitely isn't bitter and jealous that Bittle got Jack and Kent didn't
3. He definitely isn't falling for him
new mistakes by neversleepingagain
Canon Divergence // ~15k // NC-17
When Bitty took a job at a hockey summer camp in Brooklyn after graduating from Samwell, the last thing he expected out of it was being forced to spend so much time with Kent Parson.
Birthday Parfait by rhysiana
Bakery AU // ~2k // PG-13
When Kent has to duck into a bakery off a Vegas side street to avoid a photographer, he's feeling pretty pessimistic about how his birthday will turn out this year. Fortunately the baker he meets there seems determined to turn it around.
making it billboard big (and swallow it for me) by katarama
AU // ~4k // NC-17
Sometimes Kent wishes Bitty would at least let him pretend that the two of them dating could be real. Sometimes he wishes Bitty didn’t treat it as a foregone conclusion that dating wasn’t something either of them wanted.
right on time by leetlebird
You’ve Got Mail AU // ~50k // PG-13
Eric Bittle doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to dating, but even he’s embarrassed for himself when he starts flirting on Tinder with a guy who has a weird cat obsession, abs so perfect they border on trashy, and DL in his profile.
Eric Bittle also hates the office finance guy, Kent Parson, more than is probably healthy to hate one of your coworkers.
Bonnie and Clyde. Achilles and Patroclus. Blue Beetle and Booster Gold. Ransom and Holster. Affectionately known as Holsom, this duo are the best bros in Check Please! Whether it’s platonic or romantic, they’re bros for life. What’s more wholesome than that? It’s even implied that they kissed once upon a time... whether this is a sign or not, it’s totally up to you!
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this couple (romantically!) although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
wanna be your romeo by leetlebird
Romeo + Juliet / Much Ado About Nothing AU // R // ~50k
Holster's always said 'fuck the lax bros,' but when he meets Ransom, a new transfer student on the lacrosse team, Holster realizes he wants to be a gentleman and date a lax bro first. (Ransom doesn't think Holster's too bad, either.) As Ransom and Holster navigate their own secret relationship, their teams band together to get Nursey and Dex to stop fighting by any means necessary - even if that means setting them up on a date.
(Romeo and Juliet AU + Much Ado about Nothing AU. Dramatic misunderstandings can only be solved with One Direction, secret make-out sessions, snickerdoodles, Jerry's dates, and - finally - some communication.)
could’ve been us by jennycaakes
Post-Canon // ~5k // PG-13
Ollie and Wicks. Jack and Bitty. Nursey and Dex.
Justin and Adam visit Samwell for Bitty's graduation (among other things) and Justin finds himself wondering where he and Adam missed a step.
shake the glitter off your clothes now by YourPalYourBuddy
Canon Divergent // ~5k // PG-13
It’s an unfamiliar email address. The subject line reads, Congratulations! Your virtual marria…. The app cuts off the full line.
Ransom stares at it. Then he taps it open, scanning it frantically. This is — this has to be a joke, there’s no way — Shitty or someone, they must have pranked them, that’s all it is.
At the very end of the email it says this: Adam Birkholtz & Justin Oluransi, wedded this day on March 10th, 2015.
Future Perfect by Tintinnabulation_of_the_Bells
Canon Divergent // ~14k // R
WANTED: COMMITTED MONOGAMOUS COUPLES
Are you and your significant other in a committed, monogamous relationship? Have you been dating for at least six months? Are you living together? If you meet these criteria (and you are at least 18 years old), you may be eligible to participate in a COMPENSATED study (up to $300) on love and decision making. Please call 617-555-7864 or email [email protected]
The moment he sees the sign, Holster knows he's struck gold. The only problem is, he and Ransom aren't technically dating. But who are romance and technicalities to stand in the way of a business scheme that's bound to go according to plan?
How to be a Wingman by HugeAlienPie
Canon Divergent // ~5k // G
Ransom's had a wild couple weeks. He's:
-realized he's into Holster;
-developed a plan for figuring out if Holster's into him;
-discovered that Holster's into someone else
Sure, that last one's disappointing, but for Holster's sake, Ransom can set aside his hurt and be the best wingman in Samwell history. The night just... isn't going the way he'd imagined it.
23 Years, 4 Months, 3 Days by pertainstothesea
Psychic Ability AU // ~3k // PG-13
Holster can see into the future, but only one corner of Faber, and only 23 years, 4 months, and 3 days away.
Five Things Adam Birkholtz Learns in HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships by EllyAvon
Canon Divergent // ~6k // PG-13
HDFS 332: Healthy Couple Relationships is just the night class Holster is taking with Lardo to fulfill one of his core requirements. He doesn't expect it to drastically change his life.
OR: The Weirdest Healthy Relationships PSA Ever.
OR: Wholesome Holsom
couldn’t picture my life without you by jennycaakes
Meet After Samwell AU // ~15k // PG-13
Adam adopts a dog to cope with adulthood. The dog adopts Justin because, well, sometimes dogs just know things.
Things Holster Likes by Euphorion
Canon Divergent // ~12k // PG-13
The thing about Ransom was, he wasn’t gay for his best friend.
not funny by applecrumbledore
Canon Divergent // ~10k // R
This whole thing feels so weird, like they're betraying some clause of the homosocial bro code that says it's only for fun, you can't actually be gay, like they're letting someone down. But on the other hand, being with each other is the most natural thing they've ever done. Like a chemical reaction, or two halves of something whole, or one of those hand puzzles where the two pieces of metal are all twisted around each other, or the logical and satisfying conclusion of a really good book.
Score by emmgrant01
Canon Divergent // ~12k // NC-17
Ransom and Holster like to score goals for each other, and they like to take care of each other. It was probably just a matter of time before those two things became entangled.
i still don’t know how to be yours by jennycaakes
Canon Divergent // ~7k // PG-13
When they’d turned casually hooking-up their senior year into a real relationship, Holster kind of thought he was done with dating forever. He thought Ransom was his person. They were best friends. They fit so fucking well together. They literally moved into Haus 2.0 together and worked together. It’d been a non-issue.
But then Ransom wanted to go back to school, which was great! It really was. Holster knew Ransom was gonna be one kickass doctor eventually. And they’d talked about it, and Ransom moved out so he could be closer to school, and then the work piled up, and then there was fighting, and--
This recommendation list focuses on a popular pairing in Check Please! They bicker, they argue, they fight, they smo-- well, no smooching in canon but that’s what fanfiction is for! Nursey and Dex often embody the ‘enemies to friends to lovers’ trope, sparking constant speculation and hundreds of fanfiction.
I’ve compiled some of what I consider excellent fanfics that feature this couple although it does not contain all of my recommendations. They are in no particular order. I plan on creating more recommendation lists down the line, especially for other pairings in this fandom. You can find other fic recs tagged in my blog.
As a reminder, please make sure to check the tags and any warnings before reading. Take care of yourself!
got those wayfarers on by somehowunbroken
Canon Divergence // ~8k // PG-13
It's all Bitty's fault. Indirectly. That's his story, and Chowder's sticking to it.
[In which Chowder does his best to matchmake from the other side of the continent over summer break, and is immensely pleased with the results.]
Petals and Thorns by rhysiana
Musician / Florist AU // Series // ~17k // PG-13
Goddammit, Will thought as he dodged around a few strategically tall people and turned down a side street. How had he managed to leave the apartment without a hat? He peeked back around the corner. His fans were less than a block behind him, and he really couldn’t deal with them today. Frantically, he studied the shops around him, hoping for somewhere to hide.
Coffee shop? Too easy.
Ah! Nursery Rhymes: Poetic Floral Arrangements. Perfect. No one would ever look for him in there.
can’t change what the seasons bring by growlery
Canon Divergence // ~1.7k // PG-13
They get back after winter break, and Dex has done something to his hair, and he was hot before, but now he’s, like, hot and he doesn’t look like a grumpy old man.“New year, new me,” Dex says dryly, and Nursey might be having kind of a crisis about it.
want to be (yours) anyway by shellybelle
Canon Divergence // ~39k // PG-13
Dex learns Nursey’s secret halfway through practice on a cold morning in October.
“What the hell,” someone says, interrupting the Dex's shooting drill. “Is that a baby?”
(Or: Nursey has a secret, Dex has a crush, and things get complicated before they get romantic--which isn't to say they don't get romantic at all.)
Paint Me Like One of Your French Canadians by Denois
Canon Divergence // ~6k // R
Lardo hooked Dex up with an extra part time job to help make ends meet back in his frog year. Modeling for the art classes was pretty easy money, and the team never had to know. Until Nursey took an art elective and needed a private model to complete his project and pass the class. Nursey's sure that he can keep it professional and friendly....as long as Dex never sees the completed paintings.
up to 104% perfect by winchysteria
The Good Place AU // ~34k // NC-17
Will Poindexter and Derek Nurse finally know what happens after you die. You wake up in Hot God's office, you move into a really nice house, and-- you realize that you hate the person who's supposed to be your soulmate? Join a smug poet, a frigid computer nerd, and the rest of the Scooby gang as they ask questions like: what makes two people right for each other? what does it mean to be happy? does heaven get software glitches? and most importantly, why does this computer have a Southern accent?
Welcome! Everything is fine.
The World Only Spins Forward by Liminal_Space_LLC
Soulmates AU // ~63k // PG
Dex and Nursey have been at odds for as long as they’ve been friends, but when Dex’s heartbreaking new soulmark has him turning to Nursey for advice, they will discover they have more in common than they ever realized. Together, they will help each other heal their heartache and become closer than they’ve ever been before. As their friendship grows, neither of them is prepared for newer, sweeter feelings to emerge.
However, Nursey has his secrets, and nothing scares him like the possibility of having his heart broken again. That doesn’t stop him from wanting, though, and as their feelings become stronger, both Nursey and Dex find it ever harder to hide them. Meanwhile, the stakes are becoming higher as the team comes closer and closer to the Frozen Four. Can Nursey and Dex overcome their fears to realize the love they feel, or will their anxieties destroy everything they’ve worked for?
starting to get to me by playingforkeeps
Buzzfeed Unsolved AU // ~12k // PG-13
“You’ve been dragging us to bumfuck nowhere with that mating call for three years when you hear there’s a sighting. But we’ve never considered: what happens if Bigfoot answers it? That’s the goal, isn’t it? You’ve been after that good, good Bigfoot dick this whole time!”
Dex sputters. “I don’t want to fuck Bigfoot! Jesus, Nurse!” He glances at the others, disbelieving. “Back me up here, guys.”
Silence. Lardo says, “You do own a Bigfoot mating call, dude.”
All Hail the Underdogs by xiaq
Boarding School AU // ~76k // PG-13
Lucifer was an angel once.
That’s what Nursey thinks, the first time he sees William Poindexter.
Because the boy is beautiful even though he shouldn’t be. Even though he’s doubtless the kind of person who would punch you in the face if you said the words “you” and “beautiful” to him in the same sentence.
His skin is choked with freckles. It’s potentially more freckle than skin. Not just his face, where his nose and cheekbones are so hyper-pigmented they look tanned, but his collarbones and forearms and knuckles. The close-shaved dark ginger stubble of his hair should make his ears look too big or his mouth too wide but instead it accentuates the long curve of his throat, the cup of velvet skin between the tendons in the back of his neck.
“You’re the new defenseman?” Nursey asks. “William Poindexter?”
And the boy turns around and considers him with what might be contempt but what might just be the way his face looks and says, “Yeah?” like its a challenge.
And Nursey thinks:
Oh no.
In So Many Words by alocalband
Canon Divergence // ~17K // R
Derek writes a short story. That's his first mistake. His second is getting it published.
bless this mess and call it a home by pepperfield
Magical AU // ~27k // PG-13
The thing is, being able to talk to houses doesn't actually preclude them from conspiring to ruin your life. Dex finds this out a little too late. First comes the Dib Flip, then Nursey's bed, and the water heater...the Haus definitely has it in for him. In which Dex has house magic, Haus has Haus magic, and at least one of them is in love with Nursey.
#mine by rispacooper
Urban Fantasy AU // ~17k // R
Treasure, Will thought with an angry little snort. Nursey called almost everyone on the team treasure. He called Ford treasure. He’d even called Coach Hall treasure once. He did not call Will that. That was probably Will’s fault. Knowing that didn’t make Will feel any better about it.
love you as the plant that never blooms by sugarybowl & wishingonalightningbolt
Canon Divergence // ~27k // NC-17
Dex doesn’t roll his eyes, but only because he’s overwhelmed with the thought that he really does have feelings for Nursey. Gooey feelings. Romantic ones. They see each other every day; they’ve been close, there’s been touching, and maybe—maybe it’s not quite as platonic as Dex assumed it was. From watching Ransom and Holster, anyone could get the idea that that’s just what friends do. But… It feels different.
“I like him,” he says, soft, contemplative. “I like when he’s around and it’s frustrating to watch him go. It’s horrible to think he might be upset at me, or that he thinks I lied to him. It’s killing me.”
Dex doesn't know what it is to want. With Nursey, he learns.