itâs not love at first, or second, or third sight. itâs not love in the wedding bed the first time, whether they grit their teeth through it or decide together to forgo that binding step and try to get around it as long as they can. itâs about sharing a bed with a stranger while you learn their nightmares and how they hog the covers. itâs about sharing a name before you even know each otherâs hobbies. the appearances you have to keep up, and the connection you find in both being exhausted by them, laughing together because isnât it ridiculous how you not only have to be married but you have to act like itâs perfect and lovely for everyone else watching. itâs love that creeps up quiet and slow, between shared secrets that make your wedding bands mean something for the first time, and trying to protect each other from the trap youâre both in. and itâs about having the mortifying thought of âoh my god, i have a crush on my wife.â