10 Pounds of ADHD in a 5 Pound Bag

I'm having a hard time trying to take it easy. 

[7sghost]

this is, without a doubt, the funniest headline and photo combo i’ve ever seen

[primrosetta]

me: Princess Zelda’s a pretty cool character and is way more than just a damsel in distress.

some nerd: source????

me: 

[primrosetta]

me: ??????

me:

[se-meme-drakant-deactivated2025]

Didn’t do shit in Link’s awakening though

[primrosetta]

This post has over 50 thousand notes and this is the most baffling response to it I have ever seen. 

Yes, Zelda didn’t do anything in a game that she was not in. You fucking got me. In other news, Mario is a bad character because he didn’t do shit in Metroid Prime. 

[primrosetta]

[laterkiss]

happy pride to my favourite post on reddit

[lesbianshepard]

one of the funnier incidents of me assuming someone knew a meme irl was when a new coworker was talking about some woman who got arrested for tax fraud and I went "God forbid women do anything" and he got scared and thought I was accusing him of being sexist, so he started apologizing and saying how tax fraud isn't even bad, actually.

[parkchanwoohoo]

I beg my kidnappers for a phone, swearing not to make any calls or texts, and they stare over my shoulder, holding a gun to my head as I use my newly-freed hand to post, "So do like, dudes just buy ropes and baklavas from the same store or what lmfao like a specialty Crime Store"

One of the kidnappers says "balaclavas" but it's muffled under the fabric. I ask them to repeat and they do, their voice raspy from disuse. "You wrote baklava, that's a pastry." The other kidnapper goes "stfu" and then after a pause goes "Why would you buy from a crime store"

[godisafujoshi]

Then they spit roast me

[parkchanwoohoo]

I didn't wanna say this but now that someone's left this kind of comment I have to be honest: Everyone else's tags are funny but this is the only person who understood my vision for this scenario

[voynichs]

obsessed with the fact that the welcome to night vale guy thinks he invented "welcome to [blank]" and gets really indignant and thinks other people who use that phrase ripped him off. its amazing. its a level of confident i aspire to be.

[infestuous]

Wally Dion, Green Star Quilt, 2019 circuit boards, brass wire, copper tube

[chekhovs-raygun]

I SAW THIS IN THE PORTLAND ART MUSEUM! ITS HUGE!

it shimmers like no gemstones i've ever seen: green as malachite and emerald but shot through with opal, gold, copper. photographs can't do it justice because of how it shines, as well as the way the actual material elements have their own dimensions. you can lean in and study all the fine lines of the circuits or step back and admire how the rearranged whole forms new patterns. it's one of the most beautiful creations i've ever seen.

[hauntingyourself]

You just hate me because the patterns on my clothes move around like they do on chowder and yours don’t

[dogpuppy]

[toyota-supra]

What [car] would you build a time machine out of?

an old VW Beetle because it wouldn't look out of place literally anywhere

[aokozaki]

Lancelot: Egad sire! Look at that. King Arthur: Hm, rare to see a VW Beetle this far north. Not impossible, mind.

[oneheadtoanother]

[kitty-c4t]

[budugu]

[agnosticblowjob]

[thememedaddy]

[billymayslesbian]

imagining a universe where porn is a marketable genre so you have to deal with raycon ads while trying to jerk your shit

[torchichate]

You’re an easy slut, aren’t you kitten? Almost as easy as dinner with Hellofresh

[beardedmrbean]

[heavensenthousepet]

you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old

[melonisopod]

[cringlizzerd]

a professor told his class “consciousness doesnt exist. there are only neurons”

a student stood up “would you eat a raw egg and then drink oil and vinegar?”

“no” the professor replied.

“would you eat mayonnaise? perhaps on a sandwich or with some fries”

“of course” the professor replied, unsure of the purpose of this inquiry.

“mayonnaise is made from these very things and yet when combined, new properties arise.”

the professor was astounded. “what is your name?” he demanded

“shadow the hedgehog” said the student