𝗖𝗿𝘂𝘀𝗵 | 𝘀𝘂𝗸𝘂𝗻𝗮 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿
pair: sukuna x (fem!) reader
synopsis: you always stayed away from the boy in your english class who was always misbehaving and borderline breaking the law. known for his suspensions and his attitude, everyone keeps ten thousand feet away. despite being an outcast he's learned to enjoy his own company but with your curious eye you've realised there's more to him than just the rumours about him and his family.
in your last few weeks of high school he swears that you'll never see him again but four years later you find out that isn't the case.
a lot can happen in four years and now that time has come between you, you can finally figure out who he really is.
tags: childhood friends to lovers, except they were not really friends, strangers to lovers, yearning, one sided pining, soft sukuna despite how rough he seems, fluff, yes based on the ethel cain song, tw: mentions of drugs, mentions of murder, death penalty, suggested gun violence but nothing happens, more tags will be added when i can think...
part one | part two
word count: 4.2k
author's note: i've never really written anything like this before, i hope you like it... i can't stop listening to this song. a lot of the plot is based on my interpretation of the song so pls don't take it literal it is fiction...i'm also really tired rn so i've only looked over this once...pls forgive me...
You watched as they emptied out his locker.
Murmurs and whispers were heard all around you. Rumours being created and dissected right in front of your own eyes. Nothing this interesting ever happened in this school so it wasn't surprising that this was spreading like wildfire. The seniors were watching intensely, the freshmen were standing on their tippy toes trying to get a glance at what was happening. Groups of sophomores attempt to edge closer to the tight circle that surrounded the infamous student just so they can tell their friends that they were near him.
In your years leading up to your current senior year you've quickly learned that there is little one can do to put these conversations to a complete rest. Once a rumour like this starts it's rare that it ever stops. And the timing of this search being at lunch only helps to spread the fire.
A crowd of students create a suffocating circle around him. The security and principal create an even tighter circle around him.
His backpack was turned inside out completely, the unnatural melody of objects clattering to the laminated floor. A few pencils and pens, an eraser, notebooks submitted to graffiti — evident of his boredom in class and the torn cover of a novel that he was supposed to be reading for the english class that you both share together. Scraps of old receipts and tissues float to the laminated ground.
No gun in sight yet.
His locker door has been forced open, a clear refusal of his to give them the original key. And the spare from the office suddenly going missing only adds to their suspicion. The crane bar lies on the floor, its purpose already complete. It took less than a minute, only gathering more eyes to watch this spectacle. As much as the teachers try and move along the students, stating that there is nothing for them to see, the students continue to linger like an ominous shadow, eyes peering with both fear and wonder.
In your mind you can already see the headlines for the upcoming school paper, no— even in the local town news you can see it. Titled in bold, the question on the tips of everyone's tongues, threatening to spill across their lips: Was the son of a killer really holding guns in his locker? You can imagine now that when these kids go back home fro the day this will be the first piece of news told to their parents and it'll be the news of the town for the next coming weeks.
People will say that they knew it all along. That blood is thicker than water will ever be.
Like father like son.
Hands search his locker without any care, pulling all the contents out, mouths moving to tell people to step back. Endless scraps of paper and old notebooks flop to the ground in a heap. A gym bag and a pair of sneakers come tumbling out without any thought. An old leather jacket falls out and other dishevelled notes join the items on the floor.
The gaping black hole of Sukuna Ryomen's locker meets the irate gaze of the principle.
"See." He mumbles. "I told you idiots I didn't have a fucking gun."
Standing with his arms crossed, his composed act is never dropped. He looks bored. Not even breaking a sweat as they search every dark corner of his locker. The principal lets out a sigh, evidently disappointed that he couldn't find anything to incriminate the boy who has given him a headache over the past academic year.
For months everyone knows that the principal has been subjected to complaints by teachers who have taught the infamous Sukuna Ryomen. There was even the incident leading to a fellow group of teachers who refused to teach him in their class altogether.
Why hasn't he been expelled yet?
Only God knows.
Each and every meeting with his mother only entails any promise that he will be well behaved and keep his head down. But he never does. The only thing holding him back from expulsion is the consideration that this is his final year. Just a few more weeks and he'll be out of the system. He's not heading for college. That's for sure. But everybody hopes that he lives up to his word of leaving this town as soon as possible.
You try to strain your hearing to hear the words of the principal before he walks away. You can't hear the words exactly but reading the lips 'welfare check' you predict that he's suspended for the rest of the day.
The students scatter, the climax is now over. Some are evidently dishearten that their school won't make it on the local news, others are texting their parents that it was a false alarm whilst a small majority of students swear that they saw a glimpse of a firearm.
"I swear I saw it! I'm not kidding."
"Me too!"
You linger a little longer than you should, aware that you'll be late to your next class but you choose to stay. Just a little longer. Watching, Sukuna kneels on the laminated floor.
He doesn't make eye contact with students that are brave enough to walk past him. They don't say anything but their fleeting glances say enough. His hands shove everything back inside his backpack and locker without any care. You study his face tattoos, black markings that imitate his father's own tattoos. It was a huge scandal when he came to school with those. An investigation discovered that he forged parental approval before heading to a tattoo artist that wasn't even licensed.
The topic of his father was a whole other discussion. He's been scheduled for death row for the past decade for multiple killings carried out in the early 90s, a local tragedy in the neighbouring state. It was the whole reason the family moved so that it was easier for visitations. His date isn't upcoming for another nine years.
It's hard to look at Sukuna's twin brother and think that the two have any relation. Sukuna changed his last name to his father's whilst Jin still takes his mother's surname of Itadori. Appearance wise, they look similar. Identical pink hair and a sharp jaw but there are still some outstanding qualities between them.
Sukuna's eyes glare at everyone who dares look at him and it's obvious that the tattoos don't help his reputation. He's a direct foil to his brother, Jin Itadori who is the known golden child and top student of the school. You've heard that he's capable of aiming towards Harvard, Columbia and Stanford, teachers betting on which one will give him an offer first.
You can see it already: Harvard acceptance offer given to the second generation American-Japanese Student from the small town of — yeah, this headline is worthy enough for the school to brag for the next decade of students.
Your thoughts are interrupted when Sukuna, dressed in all black, shuts his locker with a slam before chucking his hoodie over his head.
You don't stop watching until he turns the corner.
/
Your drama club ended a little later than usual.
The squeak of your sneakers on the laminated floors of the hallway accompany you as you make your way outside. Being at school whilst it's empty and deserted as always managed to give you the creeps. The stench of bleach and cleaning products almost makes you think you're at a pool, the cleaners probably working overtime to get rid of the graffiti stains in the toilets.
It's a little late but there is still light outside, a little glimpse of the transition into Spring. At least that's one of the more positive things that you can look forward to after today's events. Pushing the heavy entrance doors open, it doesn't take you long to notice a figure sitting on the curb at the front of the school. Your other drama friends must have already been picked up by their parents leaving one figure waiting.
Approaching, you wonder who the hooded figure could be but it's not until they hear you coming closer that they turn around. All it takes is a glimpse of that pink hair and a black tattoo on his face for you to realise who you've bumped into.
You've never spoken to Sukuna directly. The two of you share the same English class and he sits in the row behind you but you have never made any attempt to have a conversation with him. You can only recall the one time you passed him a book and he said 'thank you' without even making eye contact.
You're…curious about him. There's always been something about him which keeps you intrigued and on the contrary to everybody else it's not about his family history. Your eyes can't help but fall upon him. You study his facial features, the curve of his nose and the plumpness of his lips. Despite his exterior roughness there's something pretty about him.
But you don't know what.
"Oh sorry." you say immediately when he turns around to look up at you. "I didn't know it was…" your sentence remains unfinished. There's a breeze in the air and the rustle of leaves fills up the silence. It's a little awkward but you're not panicking coming face to face with him. You thought that he would have stormed off by now or tell you to leave him alone but he does neither. The silence is almost inviting and instead of heading home there's something inside you which makes you sit next to him.
Sukuna doesn't move or shuffle away from you, nor does he question why you're sitting next to him. Weirdly enough, he lets you sit next to him. Sukuna has seen you around before, mostly in his English class, but he's never been face to face with you before. He knows you're not a threat and somehow he knows you're not the type to pester him about what happened today. You're pretty quiet and you keep yourself to yourself — unlike everyone else in this school you don't engage with the gossip and rumours and that's something Sukuna has noticed about you.
"Have you been sitting here this whole time? I thought you got suspended."
"I had to come back for something."
"Right."
The silence intervenes between you guys again but it's less awkward than before. You don't know what it is that makes you stay in this position, that makes you stay and continue this conversation with someone you'd never thought you'd ever speak to.
Maybe it's the fact that after this final year you'll never see Sukuna again. You'll be going your separate ways in a few months and probably never see each other again.
After a few minutes of silence Sukuna speaks up again, this time to ask you a question. "Have you ever tried dope?"
"Dope?" you question.
"The drug?"
You'd only ever heard about dope when you'd secretly stay up and overhear your mom playing her favourite cop and crime show late at night. Or even during that health lesson when the local police came in to do their annual talk about staying away from drugs.
Sukuna turns away slightly and mutters something under his breath. Just from this action it makes you think that you've done something wrong, like you've picked the wrong answer. You wonder what he would have said if you had said yes to him. Regret churns deep in your lower abdomen, cursing yourself.
You don't say anything. Not for a while. The gravel crunches loudly underneath your feet as you shuffle awkwardly. The next question comes from you. Your tone isn't interrogative just curious, and it's clear that there isn't an ounce of judgement coming from you. "What made them think that you had a gun?"
Sukuna shrugs again and you notice that he has a pretty good habit of shrugging all the damn time. "Rumours. You know all that shit though. I'm not stupid enough to shoot up a whole fucking school."
You hum. You know that Sukuna slacks off school from time to time and he doesn't get the best grades in the class but you know that he's smarter than he'll ever let on. Maybe academics isn't his best fit but you know that he's somewhat intelligent enough to trick the school and the cops into getting tattoos. He says all the right things in the end, after all he's done. You've seen how he throws teachers all on edge but then pulls back — it's emotional manipulation but he's so damn good at it.
As soon as you get the idea to leave Sukuna prompts another question. And from his tone you can tell the conversation has dipped into something serious.
"If I show you something do you promise not to tell?"
If the question about the drugs threw you off, you're even more confused by this question. There's a shiver that runs up your spine at the thought of having to be sworn to secrecy.
Sukuna doesn't wait for your reply or for your confirmation of your secrecy before showing you, again there's something that tells him that you're trustworthy. There's something about you which convinces him that you'll never tell anyone even if he gave you permission to go out and tell people.
Sukuna pulls his hand out slightly from his pocket, just enough to show you a glimpse of a handgun. Your brows are raised but your mouth runs dry. You can feel your heart thud in your ears at the sudden realisation.
"Where did you keep it?"
"I hid it somewhere else when I heard that the principal was looking for me. A hole behind the boys toilets."
"Holy shit." you say and you move your gaze away from Sukuna to the road ahead that leads out from the school's car park. You wonder what today's events would have looked like if they did find the gun on him. The school would have been put into lock down and armed police would have arrived, your mother would probably would have left work early to come and get you…
and what would have happened to Sukuna?
well, this would damage his entire record and prove that what everyone in town has been saying about him was right. He'd be local — no, national news at least.
"I'm not even gonna ask how you got that without a license." you mutter, staring down at your shoes.
"Good." he says, bringing his hand back into his pocket for concealment. "I wasn't gonna do anything with it. I just wanted to carry it."
You don't respond back to him. You don't want to talk about it anymore, there's something heavy in the air and it makes you feel a little nauseous, your stomach's been churning too much around him and you don't like it.
You let a beat pass by before changing the subject. "What are your plans for after high school?"
"What are your plans?" he throws back at you.
This time you're the one shrugging. "You know, I have a basic college plan. Get away from here for a bit."
"Holy shit." Sukuna says in a deadpan tone. He pulls out his other hand from a pocket, flicking the cap of a lighter. "Got any offers yet?"
"Not yet. What about you?"
"I'm getting out of here as soon as possible."
"How soon?"
"Once I get enough money to afford some place far, far away from this shithole."
"So by the time I come back from college you'll be gone?"
Sukuna knows, "You can count on it…or better yet I'll make you a special promise."
You sit up a little taller, the heaviness of the previous conversation now long gone. "What's the promise?"
"If you come back here once you've graduated and find me still around this hell of a place then I guess you can give me a black eye and two kisses."
"A black eye and two kisses?" You tilt your head to the side. "I've never heard of that, you know, normal people usually do a pinky promise and then call it a day."
Sukuna looks down at the lighter for a moment before he speaks again, his face turning pensive. "It's just something my dad used to say to my mom if he ever broke a promise." He flicks the lighter, a small flame spurting out. "But I guess he broke that by landing in prison."
"Did she give him the black eye?"
"Worse." Sukuna mutters, staring at the ground. "She cried. For days."
The words leave his mouth in a soft tone, almost like a whisper. You've never heard him speak like this before. You have to admit that you don't know the ins and outs of his family life but you know it must be overwhelming for him to grasp.
Again, you're curious about him. You're curious about him because you see past his 'bad' facade that he puts on at school for the teachers and for the rest of the students. You see past his acting out, rudeness and impulsivity. You've noticed that the english class you share with him is the only class where he actually sits down and pays attention. Sure, he's not writing anything down but you've seen him get through an entire book in just an hour.
Once you've said your goodbyes and you're on the way home, you can't help but think over your entire interaction with Sukuna. You reflect on all the things you've said and all the things he's said to you, trying to figure out what to make of what he's trusted to tell you. You wonder why he's trusted you with the secret of the gun or why he made that stupid promise.
Reflecting on everything on your walk home, you've come to another realisation.
You think you like him.
Or worse…
you have a crush on him.
/
After the gun fiasco you saw never Sukuna again at school and the rumours were spreading.
They jumped from him finally landing in Juvie to him being sent out of the country or that he ended up in hospital. Thankfully, your english teacher put these rumours to rest and brought everyone back into reality. Sukuna was just sent to stay with his grandfather in another town for the rest of the school year.
You would be lying if you said that you weren't a little disappointed that Sukuna wouldn't be coming back. Each and every time you came to class you immediately looked towards the empty desk hoping that he would somehow appear for the final time.
But he never did.
He didn't even show up for the high school graduation but you guessed that he probably wasn't allowed to. You think back to the promise you had made with him, 'a black eye and two kisses.'
You wonder what his lips would feel like on your own. Often before you drifted off to sleep you would hyper fixate on how you would kiss him or maybe even how he would kiss you. Would he be gentle? Or would he be a little rough? Would his lips be soft or suffocating?
You thought about this more than you should ever admit but you'd cross your heart and hope to die before you told another living soul that you fell asleep thinking about kissing Sukuna Ryomen.
You can only hope that somehow he'll still be around in four years. Just so you can put your mind at ease.
/
College was different.
So much had happened in the span of four years.
Heartbreak, friendships, friendship break ups, rejections, internships, 9am lectures, never ending assignments, partying, hangovers, travelling, discovery, arguments, make ups, drunk makeouts and so much more that could never even be put into words.
You never really thought about what kind of world was out there beyond your hometown and you're more than grateful that you had the opportunity to leave and grow. Each and every time that you returned to your hometown for the holidays you always had the idea that you had outgrown everything. And it was true, you've grown more confident in your skills and thinking, your dreams have gotten bigger and you know what you want out of life.
The only thing stopping you from continuing this independence was money.
It's only natural that you have to settle down back with your parents and save some money. It doesn't feel right to continue your academic journey nor does it feel right to jump straight into corporate life. If you were being honest with yourself that kind of life scared you. You weren't ready to jump into adult life so permanently.
So you're returning back home, just for a year or two, until you get your money together and land a graduate job that feels right.
You're not really fixated on the characters that remain from your high school. Sure you see a person from the year above working at the local grocery store or the couple you used to see making out in hallways before your afternoon math class finally settled down and somehow rent a house together. Most people you know have remained in their university cities or decided to travel the world or at least were successful in their attempt to never come back here again.
As you're walking down the road with your suitcase rattling on the cobble behind you, you don't really see anyone sticking out.
Until a figure catches your eye.
And that figure just so happens to have pink hair and unique tattoos drawn all over themselves. If it wasn't for those features, you'd think you would have walked straight past him.
"Sukuna?" you say before you even realise the words have left your mouth.
The tall figure looms over you and stops in his tracks. It's clear he was deep in his thoughts, barely paying attention as he walked by.
He's gotten…bigger. In a bulking way as if since the last time you saw him he's been doing nothing but going to the gym everyday. He's no longer the scrawny kid you remember from high school but he moves with a different type of authority and confidence. He looks like he works with his hands and smells like Marlboro reds.
He frowns at you as if trying to place where in his life that you fit. A lot of people don't reach out to him in this town unless absolutely necessary.
There's a sex appeal about him that catches your attention. All of a sudden that little stupid crush you had near the end of high school hits you like a slap to the face. You can feel your face burn up as if someone actually did hit you.
You watch his eyes scan your face for any familiarity, you think he won't remember you until a few seconds pass and you watch his eyebrows release the tension they've been holding in and notice his jaw drop slightly. The recognition hits him, you're the classmate that spoke to him before he left high school for good. He doesn't remember much of the conversation. A lot has happened since then.
For a minute you think that you'll have to introduce yourself again, jog his memory of being the quiet girl from his english class. Your mouth opens to do so but the sound of your name falls from his lips before you even get the chance to.
"You're back." His voice is rough and coarse like he doesn't get the chance to use it much.
A shiver travels across your body in hearing him for the first time. "Yeah." you say and you don't realise how nervous you sound until you croak that word out. You take a moment to cough and gain back your confidence before speaking to him again. "And you…stayed."
Sukuna nods. "I did."
All of a sudden it hits you like whiplash. The last remnants of your conversation. You and him made a kind of bet. Or was it a promise?
But it wasn't just any kind of promise…it was a special one that stuck with you. That left you daydreaming about him for longer than you should've been, even when he was long gone. Your eyes fall to focus on his lips, more plumper than you imagined before.
"Is there something on my face?" He frowns again, picking up at your stare.
"Oh no, I was just—" you trail off. It's stupid, he would never have remembered the promise you guys made as kids. "Never mind."
Sukuna pulls a confused face but he prompts you with another question. "Are you staying for long?"
"Yeah, I'm just moving back home after college. I wanted to stay with my parents for a bit before I — y'know, fly the nest for real."
Sukuna hums, not really having anything more to add. The awkwardness picks up a little. He takes it as his sign to leave you alone, unbeknownst to him that you're dying to speak to him for a little longer. "See you around yeah?"
"Yeah…" is all you can say as he begins his pace. "I will."
You begin to move too, continuing your journey. Sukuna's long gone round the corner but you can't help yourself to keep turning back to see if he's still there.
thank you so much for reading! reblogs and comments are much appreciated!!
