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Summary: Best friends who are practically attached at the hip, who enjoy each other's company, have another successful movie night. I think this will be Soobin and I's best one yet though.
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: Super sweet fluff, mention of weight insecurities
Words: 1.9K
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TXT Masterlist
What could I say to him to make him finally see me as more than just a friend? He's been my one constant source of happiness in this otherwise dull and miserable life I live. Okay, that might be a bit of excessive to say. My life for the most part is pretty mundane, yes, but Soobin has been my source of happiness for the past four years I've known him.
From his terrible jokes, infectious laugh, to his bright view on life. He has been such a joy for me, and I'm terrified I'd ruin our beautiful and endearing friendship by confessing my feelings to him. But he sure as hell doesn't make not confessing harder when he says things that make my heart skip a beat or does something that has the feeling of heat on my cheeks.
He complements me in ways only a man who sees me as a women would complement me. He wants to spend every free moment of his day with me, whether that's going out on dinner or lunch "dates", going on staycations and seeing new things we would normally never be up to seeing, or just staying at either of our home's watching movies or playing games to bid the time or in complete silence on our phones or reading books in each other's presence. He doesn't care what we do, as long as we're together. Just us two, never any of our friends, never wanting to be more than just us two. Only us having our private shared moments of joy and happiness.
Messing with the keys on my lanyard, looking for one specific key to my best friend's apartment, a lilac purple rabbit key (a matching set to Soobin's sky-blue rabbit key) trying to hurry inside with our chicken and beer for tonight's movie night. Finally finding the key and placing it in the keyhole, the door suddenly opens, causing me to jump back.
"Fucking shit, you scared me half to death Soobin!" We both laughed at the expense of my scare. Still laughing to himself, he grabbed the bags of food and drinks, gesturing for me to come inside with a swing of his free arm. "Sorry, I didn't mean to. I was walking to the kitchen and heard your obnoxious lanyard of keys and keychains." Shaking my head and closing the door behind me, I hit his arm, "They are not obnoxious! They're aesthetically pleasing keys for important things and keychains of everywhere we've gone on vacation to match said keys"
With a shake of his head, he placed the bags on the counter and turned to face me. "You know, normal people don't have like a million accessories on them at all times, right?" Placing my purse on the opposite side of the counter, I shrugged my shoulders at his response. "Well, we both know I have a million and one accessories on me at all times," he laughed at that, "and that I'm not normal like other people, you of all people aren't normal either Soobin." Digging out my phone from my purse, I click on photos and go to my favorites folder and pull up a photo of Soobin and show him my screen. The photo is of him dressed like a Minion but with a dress on with 6-inch cowboy boots on. It wasn't even Halloween or anything like that, he just wanted to dress up like that is what he said.
Both of us laughing, he throws both arms up in surrender, "You're right. Damn, you'll never let me live that down, will you?" Laughing some more and locking my phone, I shake my head and grabbed a cup from the cupboard to get myself some water. We both know we have some very unflattering pictures and videos of each other. I mean, we've literally been inseparable since becoming friends. Soobin has videos of me sleeping on his couch, drooling like a baby who is teething and snoring like a 45-year-old man. Him in weird outfits or sleeping with his mouth wide open while I put food in his mouth.
Heading for the couch, we spread our dinner and drinks for the movie out on the coffee table and make ourselves comfortable. This week's movie is a rom com, chosen by our Google randomizer of a list of popular movies to watch. We like to keep things interesting and watch different genres of movies each week. Some weeks, like this week, it's a rom-com, other weeks it's a horror/thriller (which Soobin hates but watches them with me because he knows I love them), animated or cartoon like movies, or Sci-Fi movies. This week's movie is "My Best Friend's Wedding" starring Julia Roberts, Dermot Mulroney, and Cameron Diaz. After finding wear to watch the film, Soobin finally puts it on and we sit, eat, and enjoy watching the movie together.
"I could not be brave or bold enough to EVER tell my best friend who is getting married, that I'm in love with him! I mean, even if he felt exactly the same way I did and called off the wedding with his fiancé, I don't think I could ever live with myself or ever let myself be fully happy with him with that thought going on in my head 24/7." Soobin is eating some sour gummies, without ever taking his eyes off me, while I give him my take of the movie and rant about hypothetical situations.
"I would." He puts the gummies down and looks at me with an emotion I can't quiet put my finger on. "I mean, if it was you marrying some guy, I would totally want you to know. I wouldn't feel bad about it either." Heat rises to my cheeks at his statement. "I might feel a little bad if I knew the lucky ass hole who would marry you but if he was a complete stranger with you being our only shared connection, I wouldn't feel anything other than my feelings for you."
Sipping on my beer, I sit blanking out any coherent thoughts. I'm either completely wasted, or he is, because there is no way he boldly said he would do what Julia Roberts did in the movie. Laughing a little, I placed my beer back on the table and joked with him, "Well for starters, you'd have to be in love with me to confess something like that and secondly, I would..." his voice is smooth and confident as he cuts me off. "I am in love with you. I've always been in love with you."
My heart starts beating faster and slower at the same time trying to process his confession. He really must be drunk. I am mostly definitely drunk too, because this is crazy. I can't seem to look at his face. "You don't have to lie to me," I can hardly hear my own voice with my heart beating wildly in my ears. “Don’t joke like that Soobin, we don’t play around like that. We’re...we’re just friends, best friends.” My thumbs rubbed circles against the back of my hands, waiting for his laugh after he knows he tells a terrible joke. I brave a look at his direction, my breath catching as I meet his eyes. His eyes dark but somehow still full of...full of so much emotion. Tenderly gazing at me. A slight amusement dancing in his eyes at my baffled expression. Fear for admitting his feelings and possible rejection to his confession. And... love.
Love. So much love. How can I deny his feelings when he looks at me like that. He reaches his hand towards mine, lacing our fingers, gently pulling me towards him. “I didn’t want to tell you like this. I didn’t think I would tell you at all until I was certain...certain that you might feel the same as me.” He squeezes my hand, my hands sweaty with nerves, or is it his hand that was sweaty. He’s probably just as nervous as I am. “I wanted to tell you from the moment I first saw you but held back. You seemed oblivious to my flirting when we first met, and I sort of gave up.” HIs voice is soft and soothing as he explains his reason. “I think that what I needed and wanted from you, you weren’t ready for, so I patiently wanted to wait for you, or I guess tried to wait.” He rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand.
There are so many things running through my mind. I’m trying to find any memory of Soobin that proves what he said. My mouth is moving before I my brain has time to function, “I’ve always liked you, loved you, love you. I-” My words are cut off when his lips are suddenly on mine. Soft but demanding. Sweet yet unyielding to leave mine. Everything I’ve ever dreamed of. Everything I’ve ever wanted it to feel like.
I can’t fight it not feeling anything for him anymore. I don’t want to fight the feeling of not being with him, fight the way my entire being feels like it was made just for him, the feeling of every fiber in my body vibrates with happiness just being in his presence. I kiss him back with the same passion, wanting to never leave his embrace. This is the best night of my entire mundane life.
The kiss comes to slow end, his lips seeming to never want to leave mine, the same with my own lips at the feeling of his. He’s still stealing soft pecks on my lips, cheeks, forehead, any where his mouth takes him before pulling away to stare into my eyes. Were his eyes ever so passionate, so hypnotizing to gaze at? One hand reaches to cup my face lovingly, while the other finds my hand and molds to mine. “I can’t believe I finally got to kiss you.” His voice sounds as if he is stuck in a dream, soft and dazed, but fully aware of what’s happening. “You can’t even begin to understand how long I’ve waited to do that.”
I giggle and squeeze his hand while rubbing my thumb on his knuckles. “Actually, I do.” My voice is quiet and breathy. “I’ve wanted to kiss you since we first met but you didn’t seem like the type to like me. He’s shaking his head while removing our intertwined hands to fully cup my face between both of his warm palms. “How could I not like you back? I mean, just look how stupid I’ve made myself look in front of you to even catch a glimpse of your smile or to hear your obnoxious but cute laugh.”
My insecurities about my weight have always held me back. I didn’t think someone as tall, handsome, and skinny as Soobin would ever be attracted to me. It has held me back when expressing myself to him but thinking back on it, he never once let me miss out on any adventures together, or with our friends. He’s always been my biggest supporter, even if I couldn’t see it then. “I know but...I just...” His lips press gently on mine again, easing my nerves slightly.
“You are everything I could’ve ever dreamed of,” he kisses my right cheek, “You’re everything I’ve never known I needed till I met you,” another soft kiss on my forehead, “you’re everything I wished you to be,” he kisses my left cheek, “You are the reason I get up and want to be a better man.” His captures my lips once more in a passionate kiss. “I love you and will always love you in every single lifetime we share together.
A/N: To my lovely anon I don’t kink-shame (unless you have a thing for feet lol) Your girl also has a nipple play kink. My ex-girlfriend used to worship the fuck out of my tits and even made me get my nipples pierced 👀 it also may come from the fact my nipples have always been extra sensitive and I lowkey love it. Also excuse my slight Noona kink with Jungkook~ Hope you enjoy ♡
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*Click on names to take you to links. All Images do NOT belong to me. Credit to Owner(s)*
Hello! I figured since it’s almost spring and it’s been almost a year since i posted any of my works that i’d start cleaning my drafts (hence all the masterlists i just posted lol) and post some drabbles that i have almost finished (:
hopefully within the next couple of days (or weeks lol) i can post maybe 3 or 4 shorts for y’all <3
ALSO TYSM FOR EVERYONE WHO IS STILL LIKING AND REBLOGGING ALL OF MY WORKS! IT REALLY GIVES ME SO MUCH MOTIVATION TO WRITE FOR Y’ALL (’:
All writings belong and were created by me. If you’re posting my work anywhere please be sure to either credit me or inform me that you are using my writings. Hope you enjoy!
All writings belong and were created by me. If you’re posting my work anywhere please be sure to either credit me or inform me that you are using my writings. Hope you enjoy!
All writings belong and were created by me. If you’re posting my work anywhere please be sure to either credit me or inform me that you are using my writings. Hope you enjoy!
All writings belong and were created by me. If you’re posting my work anywhere please be sure to either credit me or inform me that you are using my writings. Hope you enjoy!
Can’t wait for him! Even though I feel like I’m going to be heartbroken by the end ❤️
AHHH ME TOO!! i'm debating on how emotionally damaging i want the ending to be lol. also tysm for this, it means the world to me that you're anticipating my writings :')
Summary: Him. It’s always been him. It was him who became friends with me. It was him who had fallen in love with me. It was him who decided he should be my first. It was him who decided to marry me. It was him who wanted a family. It was him who made me a mother. It was him who ended it. Why was it him who consumed my every being? Why was it always about him?
Genre: Fluff, Humor(?). Implied Smut
Warnings: Implied Sex, loss of virginity
Words: 1.3k
AO3 Link
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Him Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
Why is it that every time my heart gets broken, I run to him? And why is it that every time it does get broken, he always wants to fix it? Yet another breakup with another stupid boy that isn’t him. I sometimes wished he would dump his girlfriend and date me, then my life would be ten times easier. But for now, I like being in his room, in his bed, talking about our love lives... or my lack of any. “Why do you keep going for guys like that, Y/N?” Because I can’t have you. “I don’t know, Jungkook. They’re all so sweet to me but then tell them I don’t want to have sex, they flip out.”
His eyes grew in size and glued themselves to mine as if I had said something ridiculous. “You’ve never had sex before? Not once?” I shook my head, “Unlike you who fucks everyone and everything, I’m saving myself.” His laugh was hearty and made me feel embarrassed for saying that out loud. I took a pillow off of his bed and hit him hard with it. “Shut up, it’s not funny.” I hate that he’s laughing. “So, wait, are you like, saving it for marriage? Or the right guy?” I don’t hesitate to tell him I’m waiting for the right guy. His eyes fill with so many emotions at once, but he ends up laughing even harder. I continue to beat him with his pillow. He grabs the pillow from me and throws it back into its spot, “I think it's cute, Y/N. I never said it was funny.” I hit him against his chest, he’s been working out more, I can feel the difference. “Stop laughing or I’m leaving right now.” He tried his best to stop but the little giggles that kept falling out of his lips didn’t.
I’m not mad, just annoyed at him picking on me. I don’t want to be here anymore, too ashamed to even be admitting this to him. I get up from his bed and I’m immediately brought back down to his bed. I hate that he’s working out, he’s too strong. “No, don’t leave. I’ll be sad if you leave.” He gave me his best puppy dog eyes and pout. He knows that makes me weak but I’m too mad to admire it. “I don’t care, I wanna leave. I’m mad.” His smile falters as he realizes I'm not joking, and it's not till then he notices tears begin to fill my eyes, that he knows I'm being one hundred percent honest. If only he knew I’m saving myself for him, then I’m sure he wouldn’t be laughing.
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t cry. I’m sorry, I'll stop.” His warm hands cupped my face and his thumbs wiped my tears. His voice was soothing me, I loved his voice when he wanted to make me feel better. He wiped every last tear from my eyes and kissed my forehead. “Look, I really wasn’t laughing at you. I just...” his voice trailed off, he was contemplating on what to say, maybe more like how to say whatever was going to fall off his tongue. “It’s just that, your first boyfriend lied to me. He said you guys had sex and that you were amazing.” Jungkook ran one of his hands through his hair as he continued, “He was obviously trying to make me jealous and unfortunately it worked.” Now I was confused. How could he be jealous of a guy who not only lied to him, but had only dated me for two weeks? “What do you mean ‘unfortunately’, Jungkook?”
He brought both hands back up to cup my face, his thumb rubbing reassuring circles on my cheeks while wiping the stray tear that fell onto my cheek. His eyes were shooting back and forth between my eyes and lips and I could feel his fingers shaking on my skin. “I wanted to be your first. I wanted to be your first everything, Y/N.” Shock. The complete and utter shock was all I was feeling with his sudden confession. Him? He wants to be my first everything? For him, I’d gladly give him my first everything. “I was over the moon when you said you wanted to practice kissing and you let me teach you. You said all your friends had boyfriends and talked about how much they liked kissing. You wanted to feel that.” I only asked him because I had always dreamt about kissing him. “It took everything in me to not make you my girlfriend that night. I always wished I hadn’t held myself back.”
His sudden confession had me seeing stars. Why didn’t he make me his girlfriend that night? We could’ve been so happy together this past year and a half. I hate him for holding himself back. “What do we do now?” My voice was small, almost nonexistent as I asked him. He looked at me and without any hesitation, kissed me. He kissed me so hard. I love him and his kisses. But I can’t love him if he’s with someone else. I want him all to myself. I need him all to myself.
I pushed him off me, our heaving breathing filled the room. “You have a girlfriend. We can’t.” My voice was just above a whisper. He knew I was right, we couldn’t do this, not even to a girl he didn’t even love. “Stay here, I'll be back.” He kissed the top of my head and was already out of his bedroom. Why did he make me stay? What should I do? I lay back on his bed and watch the ceiling. I stare at the ceiling for a whole hour, thinking about him and our kiss.
I hear his front door slam open and shut. Before I could even lift myself completely up from his bed, he was already in the room, laying me back down while kissing me passionately. I love him. I love him and his kisses. But he still has a girlfriend. “Stop,” I manage to mumble out before his lips completely devour mine. I can’t breathe, but I don’t hate it. I slap his chest a few times before he finally pulls away. I wished he wouldn’t have pulled away though, my mouth feels empty without his on mine. “Why do you want me to stop? Please, let me just kiss you.” My heart is beating outside of my chest, he’s begging to kiss me. “Don’t you still have a girlfriend?”
He chuckles as he leans back down and places a gentle kiss on my lips. “You’re lucky I love you or I'd be mad.” He loves me. I can’t breathe. He loves me. I can feel my face becoming hotter than before. “Wh-what do you mean? You still have a girlfriend, right?” He laughs again, “Where do you think I went, silly? I went to her house and broke up with her.” My eyes were wide. He did what? Why did he do this? “Of course, I wasn’t a dick head either about breaking up with her. I made sure to tell her the exact reason and how I was always in love with you.”
Now I’m really flushed in the face if I wasn’t before. He keeps saying it so it must be true. “You love me?” He laughs and kisses me again. “Is that all you heard from me?” I shake my head and pull him back down to kiss me. He broke up with his girlfriend because he was in love with me. And I was in love with him. We made out for what seemed like hours and I finally gave myself to him. It hurt at first, but then it felt like pure bliss. Words couldn’t describe the way he made me feel. We made slow, passionate love. I had given him what I had always intended to give him, and he was happy that I had gave him my first.
Summary: Him. It’s always been him. It was him who became friends with me. It was him who had fallen in love with me. It was him who decided he should be my first. It was him who decided to marry me. It was him who wanted a family. It was him who made me a mother. It was him who ended it. Why was it him who consumed my every being? Why was it always about him?
Genre: Fluff
Warnings: N/A
Words: 1k
AO3 Link
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Him Masterlist | Next Chapter
You couldn’t recall if you had ever seen anyone as handsome as him. He lifted boxes that seemed to weigh like nothing into his new home. It was as if the boxes weighed nothing to him as he would carry two at a time. You wanted to look away but your eyes were glued to him every time he came in and out of the house. I wondered if he could feel your stares as you watched him through your bedroom window. You wished you wouldn’t have thought that because when he walked back outside, his eyes were focused on you. Not just towards me, but looking into my eyes. I ran away faster than I have ever run in my life. Why did I run? Oh yeah, it was because of him.
The next day, I left my house early to walk to the bus stop. But of course, faith decided to let the neighbor and I leave at the same time. I tried not to look at him, but it was harder than I thought. Seeing him up close didn’t do justice from 50 feet away. He captivated me and I wished I did the same to him. We both shared a small smile as a form of hello and walked in silence the rest of the five-minute walk to the bus stop. Taking small glances at each other and not talking at all for the whole walk wasn’t enough for him I guess because he blurted out, “Do you always watch people from your window like that?” I felt the blood rush up to my face and shook my head. It was just him. “I’m Jungkook,” he said after a moment. “I’m Y/N.” Awkward.
We stood at the bus stop in silence until the bus came. When the bus arrived, he let me walk on before him, probably so he could look up my skirt, he seemed like the type. I sat in the third row, he sat in the third row...next to me. At first, we didn’t talk, I didn’t like it. I want to hear his voice again. “Do you think when we get to school, you can show me to my class?” How did he know I wanted to hear his voice again, I nodded, “yeah I’ll show you”. He smiled, he smiled at me. But why? Was it because I was being nice? Or did he like my voice the way I liked his voice? Who knows. Again, there was silence, but now, it wasn’t unbearable.
We’re finally at school and the few short steps into the building seemed like they were never-ending. He should me his schedule and we have almost all of the same classes. I like that I think, I don’t know yet. We were early to class so I introduced him to our homeroom teacher. She thanked me and asked if I could help Jungkook with the work. I told her of course. Internally, I was jumping for joy, he would sit next to me and have to talk to me for probably the next couple of weeks. Thank you, teacher.
We shared the first four classes together and the last two. I hated I couldn’t share all my classes with him. I wondered if he felt the same way. The teachers liked that he already befriended me and that I was willing to help him. I wasn’t helping him; I was helping myself. He was smart and didn’t really need my help with anything we were learning, I liked that. We got to know a lot about each other by the time it was the last period. We shared so many of the same interests and ideas, he was perfect. I like him, I think. If this is what it's supposed to feel like when you like someone, I love it.
The bus ride home seemed shorter than the way to school, probably because Jungkook and I haven’t stopped talking since sixth period. We talked so much, I probably talked to him today more than I talked to my friends in class. We walked off the bus and continued to talk, it wasn’t till we got to his house that we realized we’d have to say goodbye. As I was going to say goodbye, he suddenly yelled, “let's be friends!” With him, I would be whatever he wanted me to be. “Only if you give me your number.” He smiled. He must’ve really liked my answer because he had snatched my phone so fast from my fingers and put in his number. After giving me his phone and putting my number in, he ran to his front door and waved goodbye. “I’m going to text you later!” Those few words he spewed, instantly became my favorite words in the world. He wanted to be my friend first and he would text me. It was him who made the first move today, I’m glad he did.
I had finished my homework and eaten dinner when the text from Jungkook came. He asked me if I finished my homework, and I told him yes. He asked me if I ate dinner, I said yes. He asked me why I wasn’t at my window. I was confused and walked over and was instantly nervous. His window to his room was right across from mine. Did I like that? I don't know yet. The phone ringer went off and it was him calling. I answered.
“Hi.” His voice was soft and sweet.
“Hi.” I tried my best to match his tone as I spoke.
“I like that our windows are facing each other like this.” I could see his smile from here and it was killing me.
“Why do you like it? It’s only your first day of school and you’ve spent almost 80% of it with me and now when you look out your window, I’m there too.”
He laughed. “That’s why I like it. I can see my friend whenever I want to.”
Does he like it because of me? Because I'm his friend?
I laughed and shook my head, “You’re weird.”
“Well, you're my friend, so if I'm weird, you're weird too.”
I liked being weird if it meant I could be his friend forever. “Whatever you say, Jungkook.”
Summary: Him. It’s always been him. It was him who became friends with me. It was him who had fallen in love with me. It was him who decided he should be my first. It was him who decided to marry me. It was him who wanted a family. It was him who made me a mother. It was him who ended it. Why was it him who consumed my every being? Why was it always about him?
Genre: Emotional Hurt, Fluff, Slight Angst, Smut
Warnings: Implied Sex, Loss of Virginity (for now)
Words: 2k (for now)
A/N: This is a short drabble like series since I couldn't really think of a consistent writing for this. I wanted it to be longer but the drabble like style will have to do lol. The word count will update with each chapter :)
bruh!! i’m trying to put together my EXO masterlist but why is it so hard to find consistent concept/magazine photos of them. the photos i have are from random magazine photoshoot so if anyone can help pls do lol
Warnings: Ex-boyfriend Jin, Drunk Jin, Drunk Reader, Mature Language, Mentions of adultery, Drunk Sex, Semi Aggressive Sex, Oral Sex (giving and receiving), Unprotected Sex
Words: 7k
A/N: I’ve had this unfinished in my drafts for over 4 years so I finally decided to finish it. Didn’t really go over it to fix any errors so sorry if there are a lot! Hope you guys like it and hopefully, I make a writing comeback :)
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Holding onto the past was not something I enjoyed doing but I couldn't get him out of my mind. I could smell his cologne everywhere I went; I still felt his feather-like touches waking me up in the morning, I could see his figure in the distance as I walked along some of our favorite spots in the city. There wasn't a moment when I didn't miss him. He was all I knew; all I had longed for in the past 3 years, and I hated this feeling. How could he just leave me like that? How could he just throw our love away like it meant nothing to him? Finishing my last shot of alcohol and stopping my pathetic thinking, I grabbed my purse and walked out of the bar. Why did I go drink at this bar, in this part of the city, on the exact date I was thrown aside like trash?
As my feet dragged me aimlessly around the streets I once called my neighborhood, they walked until I came to the familiar entrance to the apartment complex that I once called a safe haven. The weight in my chest had me clenching my shirt hoping it would reach and calm the ache in my heart. Walking up the steps towards the entrance and entering the closing elevator doors, I pressed the floor number I had felt oh so many times and listened to the upbeat music softly playing in the speakers hoping it would calm my nerves. Hearing the ding of the elevator's doors had my heart sinking to my stomach. I knew I shouldn't be here and I should just turn around, but alcohol running through my body had me feeling a little bit bolder. And who knows, what were the chances that he was home when Wednesday’s he usually working late into the evening. Finally taking a deep breath, I stepped out the doors and was immediately hit with so many emotions. Old memories of when I first moved into his apartment, make-out sessions in the hallways, being a little too loud on the nights we made love and the neighbors giving us dirty looks, the fighting and screaming, and eventually the night he ended everything.
Stopping at the door, your hand balled into a fist and knocked at the door, not even bothering to ring the door bless since you and your ex-had accidentally broken it during one of your more heated make-out sessions. A little giggle escaped your lips thinking about that. After a minute of hearing nothing and feeling better than when I first arrived, my feet started walking back to the elevator until you heard it. The sound of the lock unlatching itself and hearing that annoying creak from the door. “Y/N?”
How could his voice still have that effect on me? It felt as if my heart had stopped beating. I could feel every hair on my body rising and my breathing was becoming uneven. Slowly, I started turning my head back and you wish you hadn’t. He was still as handsome as ever and looked as if the past three years without you hadn’t fazed him. His eyes scanned your tired figure and met your sorry eyes. Laced with confusion and the slightest bit of annoyance he spoke to you again, "What are you doing here?"
Panic was setting in and making you want to find a window to jump out of. "Jin...I-I didn't think you'd be home. I'm sorry, don’t mind me I’ve had a few too many from the bar across the street, and I-I...." Not even trying to finish your sentence, you moved your feet as fast as they could down the hall, almost running into a full sprint until tripping face-first on the tattered carpet. Groaning as I lift myself up, I could hear Jin’s hurried footsteps making their way to me. I am such an idiot, why would I come here? Tears began to spill from my eyes as I felt the wind from Jin kneeling down next to me and his hand on my back. “Are you okay?”
Physically, yes. Mentally and emotionally, no. “Yeah, just- I need a minute, go back inside your house and forget I was here.” Letting out an annoyed sigh, his hands were on my sides lifting me to my feet, his hand still felt as if they were made to hold me. Warmth spread to my face, I pushed him away from me to gain some distance and hide my flushed face. “Thank you.” Leaning down, I picked my purse from the floor and started making my way to the elevator once more. Once again tripping, now from my feet, I sat on the floor in defeat. Tears began to spill even harder now; I am too drunk to be here. Once again, Jin was by my side and helping me to my feet. But this time, he held me and started walking us to his apartment.
“No Jin please, I just wanna go home.” Trying to wiggle myself out from his grasp, his grip tightened as we continued down the hall. I didn’t want to do this, I was embarrassed enough already from showing up to his home drunk, falling not once but twice from running away from him, the last thing I needed was him pitying me and helping me sober up and sending me home. “Y/N, I’d feel better if you just stayed here and sobered up instead of being out late at night drunk as fuck.” Opening the door to his home, he took my purse and hung it on one of the hooks behind the door while closing it. Locking the door, he moved me closer to the step and sat down there, pulling my legs closer to him and he started taking off my heels. I hated him more than ever right now, how could someone who couldn’t care if I had nowhere to sleep after he kicked me out of our home and broke my heart be so fucking kind to me right. My body was shaking with rage and sadness as one of his hands held my thigh and the other was undoing the straps on my heel. He must’ve felt me shaking because he looked up at me with an expression I couldn’t figure out. Maybe he was tired of seeing my eyes swimming in tears.
My shoes were off but his hands still gripped my thighs, his thumb occasionally swiping back and forth almost as if he was trying to be affectionate. His eyes had that familiar softness he would show whenever I was having a bad day. “Y/N, why did you come here?” His voice was soft just like his eyes but laced with sadness. I choked back a sob as I controlled my breathing. Why did I come here, to the home I no longer have a place in, to the man I’m still in love with even though he has completely ruined me. My hands found purchase on his shoulders and I felt them flinch to my unexpected touch. Leaning my head on top of his, I took a deep breath and inhaled his scent, the smell of his shampoo was always my favorite. “Because I missed you.” My confession was almost silent as his hands moved further up my thighs and around my bent waist. He sat me on his lap and loosely held my waist. Turning your face towards his neck, I inhaled his scent once more, his cologne and natural body smell were intoxicating. Taking another whiff of his aroma to savor it, you noticed an alcohol smell but assumed it was you. “But I hate you, I hate what you did to me that night, I hate that you're comforting me right now instead of tossing me aside like you did that night.” The hands that were wrapped around his neck were now hitting his chest in a fit of rage, “I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU KIM SEOKJIN!” He let me hit him, accepting the punishment that he deserved. “BUT I HATE MYSELF MORE FOR STILL LOVING YOU AND WANTING YOU TO BE HAPPY EVEN IF IT’S WITHOUT ME!” My punches didn’t stop and he didn’t say anything, even when my punches started to slow down and not do any damage, he still sat there in silence as he let me cry and take out all of my frustrations.
My fist finally stopped and he took a shaky breath before he spoke, “I don’t know exactly what you want me to say but I’m just gonna be honest with my feelings like you were.” His fingers wiped what seem like never-ending tears from my face. Holding me tight, he lifted us up and made his way to the living room, and sat me on the couch. You watched as he walked to the kitchen and grabbed a glass from the cabinet and poured a drink of water and took some tissue from the box on the counter. Walking back over, he handed you the cup and tissues and sat back down. Knees touching and his hand finding their way back to your thigh. He let you get yourself back to a somewhat composed state before he started talking.
“I love you so much Y/N, but I have to be honest with you after all these years.” His thumb was running back and forth on your skin, “I wasn’t faithful to you, to our relationship, and to be completely honest I was practically using you to avoid my family.” His voice was so soft but the words he spoke were as sharp as a samurai sword, my heart was being cut up all over again after managing to heal half of itself back together. When I didn’t say anything, he continued, “You know my family was always controlling over my life, especially my love life, they had already arranged my marriage to my wi-” he stopped noticing my ragged breathing and my eyes glossing back over at his sentence.
“Finish your sentence, Seokjin.” My voice was weak but filled with pain I had never felt before. He stared at me for what felt like forever, taking his hands and rubbing his face before he spoke again. “My wi-wife. I was married the whole time we were together Y/N. On the days I said I wouldn’t be home till morning because of work, I lied. I was at her home pretending to be a good husband.” My chest felt as if it was going to implode, he was married, he lied about working. What did he do to his... his wife when he was with her? Did they have movie nights and eat food all night until morning? Did they talk about how much they hate their jobs and wanted to quit as we did? Did he make love to her the way he did to me? Did he fuck her with such ferocity and give her orgasm after orgasm until she couldn’t see or hear anything as he did with me?
I couldn’t pick which emotion I wanted to feel more. Hatred, disgust, hurt? “Continue.” My voice was cold, even I couldn’t register it was me speaking. “Y/N, I-I don’t think I should.” His voice which was almost always confident and unyielding sounded unsure and puny. His hand started reaching for my hand but I stood up and paced in front of the coffee table, “I said continue Seokjin. You’re the one who wanted to be honest here so fucking do it!” Looking at him now made me feel like I had all the power, he seemed so small compared to a few minutes ago. Putting his head in between his knees, I could hear his labored breathing, lifting his head he made it a point to look into my eyes as he spoke, “I love you Y/N, please just remember that. What I’m about to say had nothing to do with the way I really feel.” His voice was breaking and for the first time in years, he had actual tears in his eyes. I gave a half-ass nod to acknowledge what he was saying but didn’t say anything because I didn’t know what was going to be said.
That must’ve been conformation enough because he continued, “there wasn’t really much I could do to get a divorce legally. The contract my parents had made had basically no way I could terminate it. I spent a whole year reading and reading and reading the contract to make sure I had every single word memorized.” Standing up, he moved towards the window and stared out at the nightlife of the city, “Around the time we first started seeing each other, I figured I could sleep with you a couple of times and maybe take you out on dates to make it look like we were seeing other seriously and that would terminate the contract and I could get a divorce.” You couldn’t even look at him, you started to walk towards the front door but as soon as you heard him following you, you b-lined for the kitchen and opened the liquor cabinet. You were wide-eyed; all of your favorite alcohol was stocked in the cabinet. With shaking hands, I pulled out a bottle of tequila and opened it, and took a swig of it, the burn comforting me more than this conversation. It wasn’t until you took another sip of the tequila that you realized the photo hanging in the cabinet. It was the photo of Seokjin and you on your 3rd anniversary at the bar you first met at and you both agreed that this was the best place for the photo since that night was probably the drunkest you both have ever been. You heard his feet hit the tiled floor of the kitchen and stop right next to you and he watched your expression. The words I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs weren’t coming out, maybe it was because of the fresh sips of tequila running through your system or the fact that the man you swore hated you more than life itself had one of your favorite photos of you and him in a spot you had put there years ago.
It was probably the tequila but now you stormed out the kitchen and made your way to the bedroom, Jin following behind. Swinging the door open, you were now full-on crying. The bedroom where you had slept with Jin for 6 years, the bed that you and he talked all night about your dreams and future plans, the bed where you either had sweet and passionate sex or quick and rough sex, was exactly how it looked three years ago. “Y/N?” His voice was almost completely dulled from all the things you were feeling. You stepped into the room and looked at all of the photos of your past relationship with him, all the little souvenirs you both had collected over the years, and places you traveled to. Your feet moved towards the bed, your fingers running along with the fabric of the comforter. Why did the room look like this? Why did he keep everything that you had left there? Why just why? Your voice was quiet and shaky as you spoke, “Why, why did you keep all of this?” With arms outstretched, you waved them to signal the whole room, “tell me, please just tell me the truth Seokjin.
Again, tears began falling down your face. I don’t remember ever crying this much in the past three years, I hate it. Turning to him and looking at him, he also had tears running down his beautiful face. I hated that even more than my crying. With unsure steps, he slowly moved towards you. Reaching a gentle hand, he wiped your tears as he spoke. “I told you, I love you. I’ve never stopped loving you.” Your hands moved to his face as you wiped his tears.
"I don’t want to keep hurting you but will you allow me to continue talking.” Nodding, he took your hand and sat down on the bed. He let out a battered sigh, “I know I said that I would just fuck you and take you on a couple of dates but probably after the third or the fourth date, I started having genuine feelings for you Y/N. I wanted to be yours so bad and I wanted you to be mine. I had never felt happier in my entire life until I met you. During the 6 years we dated, I wanted to tell you about my marriage but was afraid that you’d come to hate me and never want to be with me again. The nights I wasn’t with you, I was with a woman who I barely knew or cared for, and little by little, I made your presence known to her. I would make sure to show her your lipstick-stained shirts or the hickeys you’d leave on my skin on full display. It wasn’t till she told me she didn’t care if I was sleeping with other people because she didn’t love me. So, while we were dating, she ended up meeting a few guys but nothing serious ever happened.”
“We had talked about you and our relationship in great length, especially the last 2 years of it, and guess she knew deep down we were never going to work out. It wasn’t until you had told me you wanted to marry me and wanted to have children with me that she felt threatened by you. Our marriage was only a business transaction but if we didn’t stay married for another 5 years, neither my family nor hers would benefit from it. When I told her that I wanted to get a divorce so I could marry you, she full-on lost it. She has kept saying that we couldn’t do that and that she loved me and I couldn’t see you anymore. Of course, I told her neither of our feelings was anything more than platonic for one another and I intended to marry you. I told her I'd give her time to sort things out with her lawyer and that I'd see her in a week, but she really wasn’t having it.”
“The next time I saw her, she was trying to seduce me and when that didn’t work, she threatened to hurt you. She swore that if I brought up getting a divorce with her, she would hire people to hurt you-” he stopped talking and was crying. Crying at the thought of me being hurt, me being hurt because of him. The hand that was still in my hand squeezed it hard, but I ignored the pain. I let him cry without saying a single word to him. After a couple of minutes, he was finally calm enough to continue. “I had no intention of breaking up with you but she knew you were my weakness. She would ask me if I had broken up with you and every time I told her no, she threaten me again and again. It wasn’t till that night you told me someone was following you home from work that I knew she wasn’t playing around anymore. I had made some last-minute plans to fake a breakup with you but we ended up getting into a real fight that night and she had texted me mid-fight and told me to hurry up. When she saw I read the text but didn’t respond she called and didn’t mean to answer and I fucked up. We just kept arguing and I snapped, I said that you should leave by saying we should end it. I didn’t mean to say it but she heard it so I was satisfied and was going to immediately tell you we should talk it over but you left and we continued to fight and we really ended it, I ended it.” He laid his head in his lap and sobbed to himself.
The alcohol was no longer in my system and I needed it to be. I didn’t want to be sober thinking about this. Thinking about the pain I’ve been in the last 3 years. Standing up, I made my way back to the kitchen and grabbed the bottle, and went back to the room seeing Jin still crying to himself. I drank from the bottle and winced from the burn in my throat and the heat from the drink spreading through my body. After a couple more sips, I tapped the bottle on Jin’s arm. He grabbed the bottle and drank it as if it was water. We continued to sit in silence as we both got drunk from the tequila without looking at one another. My thoughts were scattered and confused from the truth and the tequila flowing through me. I wanted more. I reached for the bottle next to Jin and realize it was empty. Fuck.
Looking at me, he grabbed the empty bottle from my hands, got up from the bed, and placed it on the nightstand. Walking back to sit back down, he stopped in front of me, his fingers lifting my chin slowly to look at him. “You’re beautiful, Y/N.” The fingers that lifted my chin were now running across my jawline, my hair, and then tracing my lips softly. Lowering himself so we were eye to eye, his breath hot on my lips as he spoke, “can I please kiss you?” Sucking in a nervous breath, I nodded my head. I’m gonna regret this in the morning.
His lips were faint, almost not even on mine when they connected. He was probably afraid I would disappear, and honestly, so was I. His lips were as plush as I remember, the way they molded over mine perfectly was scary. Even after three years, he still fit every part of me like a puzzle piece. His kiss became more aggressive when he noticed I wasn’t going to run away. My back met the bed as he hovered over me, his tongue forcing itself into my mouth. He tasted like tequila and regret, my favorite flavor. My hands found his hair and my legs wrapped around him pulling him closer to me wanting to devour him and his warmth, I missed this. I miss him, his kisses, and the way my kiss made him hard. My hips lazily moved as I felt his hardened member on me, he groaned into my mouth at the friction.
Breaking the kiss and getting off me, Jin was standing again and looking at me with lust-filled eyes. “I’m sorry, we shouldn’t do this, I don’t think. We’re drunk and you hate me.” He ran his fingers through his hair, smoothing out the mess I made. Still laying down, out of breath, and in a daze, I sat up stood in front of him. and started unzipping my dress. “Jin, please just once, I need you. I want you.” Once my dress was unzipped, I shimmied out the fabric and stood in just a purple lingerie set. I could hear him sucking air through his teeth at the sight of me, he always loved when I wore purple, especially if it was just for him. Grabbing his hand, I trailed it down my cleavage first and then down to my soaked panties, “See, I told you I need you. You did this to me so take responsibility.”
Groaning, he slammed his lips back onto mine before shoving me back onto the bed. The wind was knocked out of me but not from the fall. Jin had removed his shirt and his torso was on full display. How long had it been since I’d seen him shirtless? Who cares, I want him badly. He was untying the knot on his sweatpants when my hands stopped him. “Let me do it, please.” With begging eyes, he hummed and let his hands fall to his sides. Feeling extremely playful, I took my hands and ran my nails down his chest, and running my fingers over his nipples, he mumbled to stop playing around and I did. My mouth was on one of the strings, with my eyes locked onto his, he watched intently as I untied the pants and used my teeth to drag them down, but slowly rubbed it on the outline of his cock a few times eliciting moans from him before I took my hands dropped them to the floor. One of his hands tried running through my curly hair before getting caught and yanking my head back to look at him.
He kissed me once more with so much passion before asking me to suck him off. He didn’t have to ask; I was already planning on it. I was never good at giving blow jobs until Jin and I first started sleeping together, he thought me everything that made him feel good and I practiced until I could make him cum in less than five minutes. He said he created a monster out of me and that I would be the death of him.
Tracing my tongue on the outline of his cock through his underwear had his eyes rolling back in pleasure, especially when you licked and sucked his tip just right. With eager hands, you palmed his balls through the fabric while the other hand was playing with the elastic band of his underwear, exposing and covering his tip while your tongue licked his shaft. “Ah, fuck Y/N. That feels so good.” You rolled the band down so only his tip was exposed. Fuck, his tip was red with pleasure and dripping precum. You idly licked around the bottom of the tip before taking the whole tip in your mouth and sucking hard. You could hear him whimpering at your ministrations and you felt nothing but proud that you didn’t lose your touch to make him sound like that. You finally pulled his underwear down to his feet and tried taking all of him in one go. His hips jerked and you almost choked around him. “Fuck baby, warn me before you do that. I almost came in your mouth.”
You hummed around him and continued bobbing your head around him while your hands helped wrap what you couldn’t reach with your mouth. His moans were like music to your ears and you wanted to hear more. Taking one of your hands, you fondled his balls, giving him unexpected squeezes with different pressures. “Ah stop, Y/N. I’m gonna cum if you keep doing that. I don’t wanna cum yet.” You couldn’t care, I’d gladly swallow every drop of cum for him. You sucked harder on his tip as your tongue drew small shapes on it, moaning, his hips snapped into your face until he pulled you off of him. “Shit, that was close.” His breathing was heavy and he had slight precipitation on his forehead. He looked absolutely beautiful and you wished you could take a picture to admire how he looked right now.
He lowered himself and placed his hands on my face before kissing me. Shoving his tongue back into my mouth. His tongue danced every inch of my mouth and it was addictive. He slowly laid me down again, placing his hands on either side of my head while still enveloping me with his kiss. His kissing trailed down my jaw, then to my neck, and then leaving small kisses on my chest before running his tongue over my nipple. I moaned as he continued licking and sucking my clothed bud. His other hand skimmed over the fabric of my other nipple before completely releasing the one breast and tugging at the tight bud. Throwing my head back at the sensations of mouth and fingers on my chest. He tugged the fabric down of the other cup and licked my exposed flesh. “Your nipples were always sensitive.” He bit down hard making me scream out in pleasure. He switched tactics on my taut buds until he was satisfied with their stiffness. Looking down at him, he kissed his way down to my core, sliding off the bed and sitting on his knees, now face to face with my cunt. Taking a single finger, he rubbed my clothed slit, making me suck in a weak breath.
“You’re so wet for me. Did you like sucking my dick that much?” He rubbed his finger against my clit, earning a moan from me. “Or was it me sucking on your pretty tits that had you dripping this much?” His fingers tugged hard at one of my swollen nipples. His fingers skimmed around the fabric of pussy, making sure to touch everywhere but where I want him to while kissing my inner thigh. “Answer me, Y/N”, his voice was laced with pure and raw desire. He wanted to hear me but my voice was lost somewhere while I focused on his fingers. He took the edge of the lingerie, exposing my core to the cold air, “I guess you don’t want me to eat you out. I was sure you’d want that.” He blew hot air and my drenched hole and covered me back up.
“No, please Jin, I loved everything. I loved sucking your dick and loved when you play with my tits. Please, please I want you to eat me out.” My words were rushed as I begged for him to take care of me. He stood up from the floor and kissed my lips gently, “I love when you beg for me. Since I've missed you and your beautiful pussy, I won’t make you wait any longer.” He grabbed a pillow off the bed and placed it on the floor and sat on it. Once again, he traced his fingers everywhere but where I wanted him but before I could beg him to do touch me, his mouth was sucking hard on my clit, my hands instantly grabbing his hair. Sucking my bud, his fingers moved my panties to the side and rubbed my slit before inserting a finger. His finger pumped in and out of me slowly, almost to the point it felt like he was teasing me.
Growing impatient with the falling fabric, his lips were no longer wrapped around me and his hands were practically tugging me down the bed as he ripped my underwear down my legs. His face was back in between my legs, kissing my inner thighs before he went back to devouring my cunt. I couldn’t control the noises leaving my mouth as his fingers and tongue worked me faster. Jin was making sure I felt every little curve of his fingers inside me and every lick and suck of my clit. He knew what could make me come undone for him from years of being with each other. Even after three years without each other, we still knew what made one another feel amazing.
He pulled out his finger slowly, teasing my entrance until he plunged two fingers in, stretching me out beautifully. “You’re so wet me for me, baby,” he mumbled as he toyed with my bud. His fingers fucked into me fast and hard as he made sure to hit my sweet spot. His free hand snaked up my body and pinched my pert nipple, making sure to twist and tug it just the right way. My moans were now full-on screams as I felt my body going ragged. The knot that had been tying itself in my core had suddenly snapped loose and I was seeing stars. The ringing in my ears made it hard to hear Jin’s words of praise and the words that wanted to spill from my mouth wouldn’t come out. His fingers were still fucking me at the pace he was going before. I’m sure if I could hear, the whole room would be filled with the sounds of my juices squelching and moans of pleasure.
Once Jin was satisfied with how drenched I was, he crawled his way up my body leaving trails of kisses in his wake before he slammed his lips onto mine. Forcefully shoving his tongue into my mouth, all I could taste was myself and the tequila we shared. The perfect combination. After a minute, he pulled away and walked to his nightstand, opening the drawer and moving items around. I lay my arm across my face as I catch my breath, I as listen to Jin’s movements. I hear his feet scurry to somewhere farther in the room and hear a light switch flick up, probably for the bathroom. Cabinet doors slam shut as I hear him muttering to himself. The sound of his feet making his way back to me have me lifting myself up from my elbows as I watch him. “are you okay?”
He exhales a long breath and climbs his way back over me, forcing me back down. “I wanna fuck you so Y/N, can I please?” He sounded so needy and desperate for me and I loved it, I wanted to hear more. “I don’t know Jin, can you?” My hands snaked their way around his neck as I pulled him closer to my lips, but not kissing him, “I don’t think I want you to fuck me.” His breathing was growing ragged and his eyes were begging me to do let him. Giving my lips a few pecks, he rutted his hips against my core teasingly, tempting me to give in to him. “Come on Y/N, look how hard I am for you, please let me fuck you.” His hips grew more impatient the more seconds I didn’t let him ruin me. My moans were coxing him, inviting him to do as he pleased but he still wanted me to tell him.
“You can fuck me Jin,” I gasped out as he rubbed himself right on my bud, “hurry and put a condom on baby, I need you to fuck me.” When those few breathy words fell from my lips, he grew stiff and stopped his movements. Panicked eyes traced my face before they looked everywhere but my eyes. “I don’t have any condoms, Y/N.” His voice was small as he spoke to me, almost afraid that I would deny him to chance to pleasure me after almost three years of not doing so. If I was sober, I probably would’ve told him no, maybe not, but did I really want to do this. I wonder if he’s been with other women, fucked other women the way loved to be fucked by him. The optimistic side of me was oh so sure he didn’t, I mean, who keeps things from their ex in an apartment that you’d bring someone back to have sex with them. But the pessimistic side of me knew Jin was a good-looking guy who eats pussy better than any other person on this planet with a stroke game that wouldn’t let you walk for days. If he did ever have sex with anyone during that time we weren’t together, it was probably done at their home and not here.
My few seconds of silence looked as if it terrified him and that the chance was ruined, he started to move from on top of me before my legs wrapped around his waist. “I didn’t say we only had to have sex with a condom on.” His eyes widened with joy before they were glazed over in pure lust. He immediately lined himself with my entrance before slowly filling me up. I could feel every inch him of going further and further into my heat, the feel of him stretching me out was almost enough to make me orgasm. When he finally bottomed out, his lips left little kisses wherever they could while he whispered at how well I took all of him in. His pace started soft and lovingly, making sure that I felt every little thing but was also comfortable and not in any pain from stretching me out.
“Seokjin, please, go faster, I want you to fuck me not make love to me.” My begging was all he needed before he pulled out almost all of the way, only leaving his tip inside, and then slamming back into me hard. Screaming out, I raked my fingers down his broad shoulders while keeping myself secure with my legs still wrapped around his waist. He continued his tempo, fucking me hard and fast than being slow and passionate. With each thrust, he hit my sweet spot just right and I was seeing stars. I couldn’t hold back my screams and moans of pleasure, this was what I would imagine when I would touch myself, Jin’s need to ruin my every being and fuck the life out of me, of course having the real thing was better than just masturbating but the thought of it was still enough to make me cum every time.
While one of Jin’s hands kept him balanced over me, the other was roaming my body, leaving chills in its wake. Fingers pinched and twisted at my nipples until they were perked up and then would reach down in-between to where our bodies were connected and rub small tight circles on my clit. It was all too much, the pain of the past, the pleasure of the present, and the thoughts about our future. Before I could tell Jin was going to cum, my whole body violently shook as I climaxed. I could see galaxies in my vision and hear a high-pitched ringing and the sound of Jin’s groans of pleasure as I clenched onto his shaft inside me. “Fuck Y/N, if you do that, I’ll cum.”
My body was lifeless but my moans and screams weren’t as he continued to reach his high. Lowering his head to my chest, he sucked on one of my nipples as his hips bucked into me faster, harder. “I’m so close Y/N, hold on a little longer,” he mumbled as his mouth still worked my nipple. I clawed at his back as I begged him to finish. He bit my nipple and swirled his tongue to soothe any pain and continued to do the same on my other nipple. I could tell he was close to finishing; his hips began to lose rhythm and he was now kissing me to hide his moans. His hand slid between us and massaged at my swollen clit. I bit down on his tongue at the sudden pressure. My body won’t be able to handle another earth-shattering orgasm again, my mind won’t allow me to leave his side if he makes me orgasm again.
“You’re doing so good princess, cum again for me.” He kissed and licked at my ear as he groaned out his praise and command, “I wanna cum with you princess.” Fuck. He knows how much I loved to be called that, especially when it’s his low and raspy voice that calls me that pet name. With a few more fast strokes to my clit, I was over the moon. My mouth was wide open but no noises were coming out as I came again. Jin let out a ragged breath before chanting and moaning my name as he finished inside me. He finished inside me.
Jin slumped down on top of me as I tried my best to make sure he didn’t crush me. He kissed my neck, then my jaw, my cheeks, and finally my lips as finally regained some energy. He pulled himself out of me and stood there for a minute admiring me and my cum filled pussy. Closing my eyes, I listened as he walked to the bathroom and turned on the faucet of the sink, assuming he was wetting a rag to wipe me down. When I heard his footsteps coming back towards me, I opened one of my eyes to watch him. His touch was gentle as he cleaned me up. He threw the rag somewhere on the floor before laying in the bed next to me. We lay in comfortable silence before he spoke. “Y/N?”
I hummed out to him and his arms immediately pulled my naked form closer to him. Kissing the top of my head and rubbing my arms, he spoke again. “I’ve missed you so much.” He kissed the top of my head again before putting a finger under my chin and lifting it so he could look at me. “Did you miss me?” I didn’t hesitate to nod my head because I really missed him. I missed him so fucking much. A sad smile crept on his face as he gently kissed my lips. He pulled away and tucked some hairs that had fallen in my face behind my ear. He stared at me for what seemed like an eternity before speaking once more. “Do you think we could ever be together again?” I looked into his eyes and took a few seconds to admire his perfect, beautifully stupid face. I leaned in and pecked his lips and quietly let the words I never wanted to say fall from my lips, “No, I don’t.”
He must’ve been expecting that because his eyes immediately filled with tears and he pulled me closer to him. It wasn’t till I could feel my own tears falling that I didn’t want to be here anymore. I didn’t want to be sucked back into his life of lies and have to fear for my own life. I wanted to be free from him. I needed to be free from him. I tried to squirm out of his arms but his grip tightened around me, pulling me even closer to his chest. “Please don’t go Y/N, please.” I couldn’t believe the pain was I hearing in his voice, the hurt he must've been holding onto for so long. He sounded pitiful. I hated it. I hated him. But most of all, I hated myself for saying I'd stay. We held each other till we couldn’t cry anymore and once we couldn’t cry anymore, we made love to each other till the morning sun started to rise.
All writings belong and were created by me. If you’re posting my work anywhere please be sure to either credit me or inform me that you are using my writings. Hope you enjoy!
