Oh dear.

20 Australia

[seriousfic]

Keanu Reeves definitely not an immortal who is definitely not still bitter that Shakespeare stole his work.

[petbud]

i have small hands

[youaremyeverlovin]

bring them closer to u, they r just far a way

[petbud]

wow you were right…

[hydro-homies]

Roberts Battinson

[skepticsubstitute]

Ok this ones actually funny

[must-be-mythtaken]

Accidentally typed “indistinct buttering” instead of muttering and that is somehow super creepy. Like, you can just barely hear…in the other room…the scrape of a knife against toast.

[soyeahso]

That’s just how it is in England.

[nomehablen2]

like imagine if you’d never seen a dog and you saw a saint bernard and you were like, what’s that and then someone was like, thats a dog. and then you saw a chihuahua and you were like ok whats that and they were like, that’s a dog. wouldn’t you feel lied to? wouldn’t you sense that something was amiss

[roaringstream]

You doin okay OP?

[twitterlols]

[trashwizard]

[sethalapod]

[ampervadasz]

Best birthday photo

[bunjywunjy]

that’s the human experience right there

[angels-twice-descending]

sorry not sorry (credits to @arianwen44 for the artwork)

[biggest-goldiest-fish]

FUCK YOU FUCKING FUCK YOU FUVK WHY FUVK THIS WHY

[pixiecodesnowbaz]

N-

[gif87a-com]

[sushinfood]

that’ll learn ya

[weaux-deactivated20170327]

she was just thirsty :(

[the-ace-of-hearts]

I HAVE MADE A MISTAKE

[altedi]

[zackisontumblr]

i probably spend too much time in my computer chair

[kallmejonesy]

This is my brother.

[zackisontumblr]

sorry for sitting on him

[xxziggystardust]

[dnotive]

HEY. HOW DID YOU GET SO BIG.

WHAT KIND OF DOG ARE YOU.

I HAVE QUESTIONS FOR YOU.

[spillybun-deactivated20190921]

Ominous positivity

[spillybun-deactivated20190921]

You will be okay. You have no choice.

[jadedsoggy]

Everything will turn out fine. You cannot stop it.

[justabirdy]

You will succeed. It is inevitable.

[cryptocism]

look me in the eyes dc and tell me a seventeen year old would make a good ceo

[writing-prompt-s]

You run a tattoo parlor. Every couple of weeks, the same customer comes in, always requesting the same tattoo: an additional tally mark on an ever-growing cluster of tally marks.

[th4nkyoub3n]

“what are you counting”

“how many tattoos i’ve gotten”

“i’m no longer serving you”

[big-ass-magnet]

all these deadpool comic runs are ridiculous. Deadpool vs This. Deadpool kills That. 

how about Deadpool Has a Nice Day? Deadpool Is Validated by His Peers. Someone Loves Deadpool Because of His Flaws Not in Spite of Them. Something Nice Happens to Deadpool and It Is Not Immediately Ripped Away from Him by a Cold and Unfeeling Universe. 

[bye-angel]

did deadpool write this.

[you-had-me-at-hallow]

I have a headcanon that Hermione insists her children attend some primary muggle schooling before Hogwarts, just as she had done. Now, imagine Arthur Weasley attending his grandchild’s science fair, being the ultra proud grandfather….and yet also completely geeking out over absolutely EVERYTHING.

[jamiesshelves]

Canon

[themiscyra1983]

“That is a volcano, that is a VERY SMALL VOLCANO, how - young lady, how did you make this? Baking soda and food coloring? MARVELOUS!”

[worlds-of-ink-and-paper]

the kids would love him.

[bluefirecas]

Never have I ever loved anything more than I love this

[hexcoderose]

All the muggle teachers would think he was being so adorable, “pretending” not to know how potato batteries and mini-volcanoes work, fawning over the hard work the kids did on even the simplest the projects. And he comes every year, because after the kids have aged out (”gone on to some boarding school in Scotland,” the teachers say over bad coffee in the break room, “they didn’t seem the type”), he gets an honorary invitation to the fair every year, because he never stops making the kids feel smart and good. 

[elfwreck]

“And this airy-o-plane, it flies by means of a… rubber band? Did I hear that correctly? No magic at all? Doesn’t flap its wings like a bird? MARVELOUS! What an ingenious method of flight!” *looks around* “You, sir! With the ribbons! This child deserves one of those prizes!”