tacoTuesdayinApril

Alcoholic practicing sobriety. I'm Sterling and I'm your friendly neighborhood sailor. I like stuff and love being asked questions. You know where to leave it.

[yeahiwasintheshit]

[autumntides]

You don’t want to be rich. You want to live freely.

[godsbaby]

That’s it

[royalgoons-deactivated20220109]

that’s it, man.

[mossadspydolphin]

The idea of being super-rich actually scares me. I don’t want to be so empty inside that I spend my money on $30,000 ugly handbags and giant boats and shit. I just want to pay my bills without panic and support lots of charities.

[somethingwendythiswaycomes]

And maybe go some places

[thecommonchick]

I don’t want a sugar daddy but maybe like a sugar buddy. 

I just hit him up like “Hey how are you today?” 

and he replies “Doing great thanks for asking here’s $7,000.” 

[inactiveblog123]

Like Michael Buble and Santa

[porterr-robinson]

[catlips001]

Donald: “Phew. The snow storm can’t get us here..

A- ”

[kristina100000]

if the gay character of a show looks like this its probably a really bad show

[benverly]

bold of u to say glee is a bad show

[stellakowalskis]

glee is a bad show

[xenosagaepisodeone]

highschool teen romance film

[hopelesslyy-lost]

good christian girl: *is paired with withdrawn goth boy for assignment* ugh i hope i stay on this trouble maker’s good side :(

good christain girl: *spots a book poking out of withdrawn goth boy’s bag* hey what’s that?

withdrawn goth boy: *pulls out copy of romeo and juliet* oh yeah just some light reading i usually do in lunch.

good christian girl: you…….like Shakespeare?

withdrawn goth boy: [quotes some of the wherefore art thou romeo scene without looking at the book]

good christian girl: that’s incredible!

withdrawn goth boy: yeah, i’ve always felt i’ve had a connection to romeo- as well as the protagonist of [another 9-11th grade mandatory reading book]

good christian girl: yeah *slightly flustered* same here….

bell rings

good christian girl’s friend: Kelsey-Anne Sue come on!! were going home!

good christian girl: be there soon guys! *looks back at withdrawn goth boy* see you around then, i guess :)

withdrawn goth boy: *cracks a shy smile* y-yeah. see you around

good christain girl: *coughs slightly, indicating that her mysterious disease may be returning*

[leafgreen6]

[totalariana]

When you ask your Mom for money and she ask where your money at

[blackberryshawty]

ME

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

me: im writing a fic but its not alpha-d

friend: you mean not beta-d?

me: no i mean i havent written anything yet

[itsagoodluckkiss]

[flowercrownbi]

I don’t want to date. I just want to magically end up in a long-term and emotionally-secure relationship with someone cute

[rainbowgazes-archive]

the nsa agents watching me check my phone after they activated my phones vibrate function without a notification 

[rainbowgazes-archive]

they know that i know

[larkstonguesinaspicpart1]

Can u LITERALLY imagine dying and having ur body donated and instead of being used for research or organ donation some tumblr yahoo with a url like “cummy-kitten” buys your skeleton and takes selfies with it and unknowlingly youre at the center of tumblr drama but youre fucking dead

[maxknightley]

What a wild hypothetical that, for the sake of my fragile emotional well-being, I will assume is not based in some hellish recent event I have yet to hear about!

[thatonezombiecosplayer]

Me: *at the grocery store, heading through the bakery toward the donuts because I really shouldn’t but damn it I’m an adult and I want a goddamn donut*

Cake department:

[strawbubbe]

@marsincharge

[starlightandtears]

The unexpected laughter that just ripped through my body made me pull a muscle sfojdfkddk

[salty-red-mage]

@staff deleting all porn while ignoring blogs promoting violence, bigotry, and hate speech

[sebas-chan-butler]

Hahahah yeah

[tamwah]

every time I drink water I think of that stupid image of the mom on her computer and the baby drinking gasoline or something and he’s like “water”

[tamwah]

[sagihairius]

i hate public bathrooms for all the obvious reasons but also because one time somebody in the next stall silently reached under and untied my shoe

[gaypeopletwitter]