im only saying this once
the only acceptable jobs for spider-man
broke high schooler
broke college student
freelance photographer
high school teacher
unpaid intern
pizza delivery guy
research assistant for doomed scientific project
guy who stands on street and spins sign for quiznos
being spider-man
and thats IT i dont want any of this “hes a genius tech ceo making millions” SHIT. Spider-man is BROKE and he missed rent this month and he has a tiny apartment and thats how its MEANT TO BE. he doesnt make money because he is our Friendly Neighbourhood Spider-man and not fucking Tony Stark.
how about dog walker while in spiderman costume
you. you get it
im imagining “being spider-man” as his full-time gig and i just
he has a patreon. the description is just the words “I’m Spider-Man” and all he ever posts is specifically-requested selfies from people who want to be sure its really him. pinned to the top of the page is a picture from the top of the empire state building (not the observation deck, the real top) of his spider-gloved hand holding a bagel that is on fire, with 34th street in the background
For your consideration: Peter Parker who gets a degree in programming just so he can tell people he does freelance web design.











