New Bland Marvel Headcanons

Hi y’all! This blog is inspired by the abandoned blog Bland Marvel Headcanons (https://blandmarvelheadcanons.tumblr.com/). Please read the rules page before submitting. Submissions are always open y’all! Icon made by just-figuring-it-all-out.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

In the Raimiverse, Aunt May is Christian but Uncle Ben, Richard Parker, and Mary Parker are all Jewish. Peter Parker grew up with Jewish cultural traditions and holidays as well as Christian holidays.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Courtney Ross survived Excalibur #5 but was left amnesiac. With no memories of her previous life, Courtney assumed a new name and became an extremely successful stand up comedienne in London.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Natasha didn't try lifting Mjolnir in Age of Ultron. But if she had, she'd have been shocked to discover that she is in fact worthy.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Deadpool makes a lot of anon submissions to New Bland Marvel Headcanons but they're usually NSFW, unrealistically self-flattering, or a combination of the two.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Steve Rogers loves the coffee and donuts at Dunkin

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

One of Jubilee's many hidden talents is that she has an amazing singing voice.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

The X-Men live only a few miles from the Connecticut border and because of this, they spend as much time in Fairfield county as they do in Westchester county. The X-Men's go-to shopping mall and movie theater are both in Danbury, Connecticut.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

The Raimi universe's Peter Parker is a vegetarian.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

At one point or another, Norman Osborn put each member of the Dark Avengers through a "training course" by incapacitating them with knockout gas and turning them over to Arcade, who put them through Murderworld obstacle courses.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Whenever Human Torch makes microwave popcorn, he uses his powers to create precision heat waves to pop all the un-popped kernels instead of putting them back in the microwave.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Despite his playboy reputation and behavior, Tony Stark is secretly a hopeless romantic. He wants to find true everlasting love with someone who is his best friend. His favorite novel is Emma by Jane Austen.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Norman Osborn loves pumpkin spice coffee.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

As much as Tony Stark enjoys technology, he secretly really enjoys the cottagecore hobbies of embroidery, gardening, baking, cooking, making jam preserves, reading Jane Austen novels, and lacemaking. He also dreams of living in a cabin in a wooded area near a lake.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Howard Stark is a good Jewish boy who dreamed of marrying a good Jewish girl when he was young. That dream was fulfilled when he fell in love with Maria Carbonell, a nice Jewish girl.

[figuring-it-all-out]

Iron Man Pride Arc Reactors: Gay / Lesbian / Bisexual / Pansexual / Polyamory / Polysexual / Asexual / Aromantic

Feel free to use just please like/reblog/credit if you do.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Bruce Banner falls asleep to Bob Ross’s painting shows. He finds them relaxing. When Tony is sitting with him while watching the show, Bruce will fall asleep on his shoulder and Tony will pull a blanket over Bruce.

[newblandmarvelheadcanons]

Diamondback sees herself more as a New Yorker than a Texan.