🌱 / Sprout

DON'T ask me about the Spider Harvest

[normalsproutanon]

I’m Sprout :) aka a sickly little creature, deficient in everything but a will to spite god by continuing to live

@plant-fam < my cats and maybe doodles

Rules :

Don’t ask me about the spider harvest

Don’t look at my blog, if you see one of my posts on your dashboard, you can look at it. Do not scroll my blog because it is NOT presentable. For a semi-presentable blog, go see my @lemons-with-eyes

Side note : following me is a mistake. Also I mainly use this to complain about the fact that I have health issues

Zionists, terfs, aphobes can ALL fuck off

[cannabiscomrade]

So Arizona launched an “education hotline” that allows “concerned parents” to report “””critical race theory””” and other things like ~gender identity~ being taught in the classroom

It would be a shame if the number and email were spread to bad actors looking to prank call the AZ Department of Education

602-771-3500 or empower @ azed .gov 🤡

Horne said two staff members are sorting through the calls, and two investigators are working on credible leads.

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

and for the love of god, don’t just spam it with memes or le funny shrek jokes or whatever, they’ll just hang up

make plausible-sounding reports for things that don’t actually exist, so that they actually have to waste time/resources investigating false leads - the goal is to waste time they would otherwise be using to do their jobs, not to get tumblr clout for being an epic troll

[neko-setsuka]

So apparently the internet article said the superintendent wouldn't be deterred by the prank calls because they would 'taper off eventually'. It'd be a real shame if this post stayed in circulation via queues so they get a consistent list of prank calls to filter through. 😇

[notgilderoylockhart]

subscribing to a fic isn’t enough I need the author to blast a bat signal into the night sky whenever they update

[snakeskinass]

Please stop reposting this, let my notifications rest.

Update: IF YALL MFs KEEP ON IM GONNA DELETE THIS POST

[yeahokayillreblogthat]

Yeah okay, I'll reblog that!

[onmywayoutokay-deactivated20240]

this is what i mean when i say "sniles so sneetly" btw

[onmywayoutokay-deactivated20240]

i appear to have infected 14k people with the phrase "sniling so sneetly". it makes me grin. snile, even. perhaps sneetly

[milkoftheflesh]

@normalsproutanon

[dear-ao3]

[milkoftheflesh]

@normalsproutanon us

[normalsproutanon]

Fr

[demilypyro]

Me when I've just spent a week or so being digested by a dragon and my girlfriend shows up and saves me and the first thing she does is make me take a bath with her, touch me all over and show me full frontal

[yamada-ryo]

[bogleech]

1 hour after having been a puddle of wet bones:

[i-am-a-fish]

HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!

‎ ‎

‎‎‎‎‎

‎ ‎‎ ‎‎a bug ↘

‎ .

[iwantbrioche]

HELP!!!!! TOO MUCH BLUE!!!!!! IM DROWNING!!!!!!!!!!

[kittensnax]

Everyone talks about the wonderbread guy but nobody talks about how the wonderbread isn't necessarily the fetish object - it's supposed to symbolize like overcommodification or something. Like wonderbread is such a synthetic suburban concoction it implies wherever it is, that area has become gentrified and mown over by capitalism and this like caricature of commodification. That's why all the other pics the dude commissions are women (typically white and blonde) chopping down forests and stuff. The fetish isn't the bread. The fetish is this extreme caricature of earth and culture being consumed by the unstoppable force of like. Sterile Kroger marketability and commerce. That's why the women are always BUYING the bread and not like, fucking it. Its not about the loaves people. It's about Karen Bad End TF.

[kittensnax]

Thank you for the additional information!! And also this is so much more succinct than my rant

[desinteresse]

I know this is gonna piss off nerds but paperbacks are superior to hardbacks

[desinteresse]

Moodboard

[humble-wayside-flower]

#hardbacks are for collectibles paperbacks are for loving it so much you want to eat it (via queerpyracy)

[rollerskate2theface]

Sooo this happened on tiktok

And the comments are gold

(+Extra)

[bee-dot-exe]

I'm crying

[starpeace]

i love when tragedies are like “the love was there. it didnt change anything. it didnt save anyone. there were just too many forces against it. but it still matters that the love was there”

[starpeace]

this post got over 1000 notes in four hours in case anyone was wondering how we are all doing emotionally

[birdsareblooming]

For the love of god stop

[realshinjiikari]

[birdsareblooming]

this post seems to have broken containment and if anyone's interested in what they were telling me to stop, i found the og post with this song and was mass reblogging it at an alarming rate. ive done this multiple times but i think this was the instance i reblogged it 64 times in a row

[twinkothydrake]

[coochiekrab]

I understand that a lot of people are really into gardening but i think you should refrain from pointing at peoples houses and announcing the sexes of the bushes outside because you might accidentally get the correct ratio of men to women in that household and scare the crap out of the residents inside. Especially if you’re going to end your statement with “that’s why they’re not going to survive”

[coochiekrab]

Last night i was sitting at my computer with my window open and i heard a guy on the sidewalk walk up to my yard, vaguely point at my house (it was dark) and say “oh yea there’s 3 females and one male, thats why they’re not going to survive” and then walked away and it took me walking outside with a flashlight to understand he was referring to the fact that 3/4 of my rosemary bushes have flowers and that he was not stalking my family of 3 women and 1 man and threatening us

[animentality]

[slyandthefamilybook]

tumblr glitched out somehow but idc because this is way better than the original poll