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Xuebing Du
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@ohehmgeepers
hi everyone! sorry you haven't heard much from me. this account was made unavailable by tumblr for about a month, so i made a new one in the meantime : @vrykcain . i'm over there now, and won't be using this account any longer :) i look forward to seeing you soon!!
Poorest Little Meow Meow
Harry du Bois (Disco Elysium)
Bruce Wayne (The Batman)
Tumblr's Poorest Little Meow Meow Contest
Remember, don't just vote for your fave! Consider who is the WETTEST, SADDEST, and has the WORST MORAL COMPASS.
We just put this up and now are waiting for the teachers to notice
Ok so the thing about reading like books which are "predictable" is that I, a story enjoyer, go completely bonkers about it bc its like Enrichment in my Enclosure. A scene parallels another earlier scene between different characters thus serving to highlight the differences in their views and priorities???? A line makes me think "hmmm I bet that's gonna be relevant later" ends up being relevant later????? I am a tiger chewing ice cubes out of a pumpkin. I'm so so happy. Please foreshadow more things. Throw the completely anticipateable plot beats at me like catnip mousies!!!!!
YEAH!!!!!!
When I see a rifle on the wall, I want to see that rifle being fired! I'm literally on the sidelines shouting "Chekov! The gun! Get the gun, Chekov!"
changed my user a few times. hi everyone. for now, all my shit should be on @ohehmgee . okay bye love you
but anyway that’s enough Christmas here’s Kim and Harry
2022 Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards Winners
the competition is open to wildlife photography novices, amateurs, and professionals, celebrating the hilarity of our natural world and highlighting what we need to do to protect it
full roster of this year's winners with narratives by the photographers: X
the way I see it in my humble scholarly opinion is that post awe elizabeth spends a bunch of time with both jack and barbossa and gets the absolute prime front row seat to their whole deal
she doesn't tell either of them that she meets the other regularly not for any actual reason she's just entertaining herself she's like hee hee hoo hoo I play them like fiddles they'll never know my tricks
jack: [complains for hours about how barbossa took his fucking ship AGAIN and how hard it is to get a lead on her]
elizabeth who knows exactly where the pearl is because barbossa was over for drinks literally last week and told her where he'd be going: damn that sucks a lot dude wish I could help x
Nicole Cliffe has a whole twitter thread about funny/horrifying anaesthesia stories that you should read all of, but this is definitely my favourite
Judging from the way the stripes go, that scarf was knitted sideways. Meaning the person cast on 17 feet’s worth of stitches and knitted those 17 feet back & forth for three inches. I’m in awe.
The next Doctor’s costume looks great.
You forgot the best part
I preface this by saying I have a weird metabolism that clears through anaesthesia crazy fast (I heal quickly too; my spouse has accused me many times of being other than human).
So when I got my wisdom teeth out, my darling warned them not to leave me unattended while in recovery. “She will not take as long as you think to come out of it,” he said. “She will not stay put.”
The medical staff dismissed this as implausible. When my surgery was done, they shuffled me into recovery, ensured I was stable, and left me alone to sleep it off.
I did not take as long as they thought to come out of it. I did not stay put. A startled and slightly horrified nurse intercepted me staggering towards what I was apparently convinced was the exit, but was in fact (I am told) the gent’s.
They bundled me out to the car with embarrassing haste, probably eager to let me be someone else’s problem, and my best beloved took me home, aided by our friend Mathilda, who had volunteered to help wrangle.
They got me home and I immediately passed out on the sofa for round two of my drug nap. They ran out very quickly to the pharmacy to fill my prescriptions, figuring they’d be back before I woke up again (I have also been accused, again by my spouse, of being likely to sleep through the apocalypse).
The fools.
So… Backstory: we, as a group of friends, had been trying for a while to beat the last level of a video game, and nobody had managed it yet.
When m'darling and Mathilda got back, I was no longer on the sofa. The TV was on, displaying the screen where I had victoriously finished the game. The whiteboard in the hall had been wiped clean of any trace of grocery list or memos, and instead had a huge, smug SUCK IT, BITCHES written on it in multiple colors, and I was unconscious and snoring, facedown in the hallway, halfway through the bedroom door.
This was over ten years ago. I have yet to live it down.
to be quite honest i need online leftists who dont have irl disabled friends to think long and hard abt covid rn. i KNOW some of you read all this shit online & read people begging you to wear a mask and just don’t irl bc you have nobody to hold you accountable for it.
it’s not online discourse, it’s not about looking like a good person, and it’s not just an outward signal to people. it literally keeps people safe esp if you’re going to restaurants and concerts and shit. maybe you dont know the disabled people in your online circles irl, but there are real disabled people in your library, on your bus, in your classrooms, and in your workplace.
some people geniunely don’t know better bc of govt propaganda, but if you’re in online leftist + disability advocacy circles and not wearing a fucking mask irl?why? truly, why? you should feel ashamed at being complicit in mass govt propoganda encouraging the death of disabled people, the working class, & poc.
covid spike predicted this winter. again
mortality rate among workers is five times higher than the general public
life expectancy is affected by covid & disproportionately affects black, latine, & native communities in the us.
it is not too late to start. wear one to work, on the bus, and when you stop in for coffee. idc if your irl friends look at you weird. start wearing a mask.
WEAR A FUCKING MASK 🔪
drew the babygirl with a cool color palette i found
less “if you see a man and woman together at pride be nice! they could be bi/pan/trans/ace/aro” and more “stop gendering strangers to harass them anywhere, but especially at pride holy shit”
you know what? i want this to reach the people who do this– especially the ones claiming to support trans folk (usually in really hollow ways lol i’m not bitter). keep reblogging– i want this sentiment to be widespread and for people to stop gendering strangers! especially in explicitly LGBTQ+ spaces!
“No cops at Pride” includes you, you gatekeeping little demons. You aren’t there to police who “looks right” or who seems like they’re “allowed to be there”. Just don’t fucking harass strangers, it’s not that hard.
Looking at gardening and landscaping websites and peering into this realm where people say just. random things about trees as if forests or any natural context for trees have never existed and also biology doesn't exist either
Landscape contractor: So as we know there are five basic kinds of tree: shade, interesting, street, tall, and fruit
Homeowner: yes, continue
Ah, the Tomato is/is not a fruit debacle again!
So, the website is not in the wrong here- they're categorizing the trees by utility in landscaping, rather than by taxonomy, which is a perfectly reasonable thing to do! This is a gardening and landscaping website, where people are presumably going to read about the landscaping uses of trees.
A Tomato is taxanomically a Berry, but when you're cooking with one, it's utility purpose is the same as a vegetable. An apple and a Rose are practically cousins but only one of them makes a really good pie.
Wizards! Stop scrolling!! This is your reminder to:
Feed your homunculus
Recast your wards
Drain all your old potions into the sewer system
Send that cursed demon tooth to the Wizard Council, their problem now
Never blink, not even once, blinking is failure
Please don’t empty your old potions into the sewer system. Urban sprawl has resulted in the draining of witches’ swamps, which previously functioned as detoxifying catch basins for magical runoff.
Without the swamps, potion runoff can now directly enter local waterways. Previously rare occurrences such as articulate raccoons, deer with human hands for antlers, and people being turned into a variety of small vertebrates when consuming game meat are now at an all-time high. Old potions should only be disposed of in Council-maintained magic recycling facilities.
Be astute, don’t pollute!
An important message from the National Lawyers Guild - Detroit & Michigan Chapter
source
<older man and older woman chatting amiably at a table, their conversation is just on the edge of intelligible>
Denise: Oh, hello!
Bill: We were just talking about you kids.
D: I’m Denise Heberle (HEB-er-lee)…
B: And I’m Bill Goodman.
D: Together we’ve been fighting fascism for over 50 years.
B: And so much has changed over those 50 years, such as the ingredients to a successful firebomb!
D (cheerily): And the glass that bank windows are made of!
B: But there’s one thing that hasn’t changed over 50 years, something that is so important to tell you kids who are new to this movement.
Both: Shut the fuck up.
D: You’re sitting in the police transport van after a protest?
B: Shut the fuck up. In a holding cell, with your comrades?
D: Shut the fuck up. Cop knocks on your door?
B: Shut the fuck up.
D: Texting on an unsecured device?
B: Shut the fuck up. Pulled over by the cops after a protest?
D: Shut the fuck up. Cop just asking about your day?
B: Shut the fuck up. Feds call your mom?
D: Tell your mother to shut the fuck up.
B: Now. Repeat after me. When the cops come calling, what do you do?
(Cut to Bill standing with eight kids)
Kids: Shut the fuck up!
(Cut to Card:
“Shut The Fuck up A Public Service Announcement from
NATIONAL LAWYERS GUILD
Detroit & Michigan Chapter”)
