I actually do think we should discourage women from becoming housewives. Do not become financially dependent on a man. That's how a lot of women ended up dead over the years. A man gets violent suddenly and you have to choose between homelessness or potentially dying at his hand because you have an enormous gap in your resume and no degrees or certifications or anything that will help you pursue a career that will allow you to be financially independent. He owns your bank account. His name is probably the one on the car. Try and leave and he can report it stolen. Where will you go then?
And if you do become a housewife, take steps to protect yourself. Make sure you’re legally married, for starters; stay-at-home girlfriends have very little legal recourse to claim their partner’s assets in a breakup. Make sure your name is on the house deed/rental agreement, and have your car in your name, even if your spouse is paying for it. Have your spouse transfer money every month into an account solely in your name, so you can buy yourself things without needing permission, but also so you can save up to leave if needed.
If your spouse fights you on any of this, then don’t quit your job. The tradwife to poverty pipeline is real, and so is financial abuse.
also, many women/people experience controlling behaviour and domestic violence from their partner for the first time during pregnancy. don’t risk thinking “he’s just stressed, it’ll get better when the baby comes” because it won’t. neither you and your child will ever be safe with that man. get out as early and safely as you can
yall know that post with all of those absolutely stunning crochet flowers? well i just bought a pattern from the shop those are from and Good Fucking Lord.
I was expecting a like a Chart or two, maybe some written instructions. not Seventy Seven full color pages for One type of rose.
this was like 8 bucks???? obviously i did some redacting but Good Lord. if you are even a little bit into crochet go throw money at this absolute Mad woman its Definitely worth it.
back at it almost an entire year later. and i can now confirm she's this insane in all of her patterns (there's over 84 of them????) (<compliment)
she has also made a website since the first post (link) the patterns are cheaper there and the payment is handled through PayPal (and I'm guessing she gets a Way bigger cut of the money than with her Etsy so maybe check out the site instead) of the Etsy listed above.
also quick faq below the cut bc idk, supporting small businesses ran by WOC is important and this lady is rad. I just genuinely love her products and want more people to know about them.
The patterns are full color and come with charts, full color pictures, and standard written instructions with a key in the back and tutorials for all non standard stitches and techniques.
They aren't actually that difficult. I crochet very rarely (and mostly do amigurumi) bc of wrist issues and still had a really easy time working through them bc like, the techniques aren't basic but if you don't already know them you will know them after doing the pattern. A lot of the difficulty comes from using a very fine thread, but you can also just use normal yarn to have giant beautiful flowers instead of life size ones (i personally prefer a size 10 instead of the recommend size 40 bc it's easier on my wrists) Also here's a link to her shop where she sells the thread. it's an Etsy link bc i don't think she has a non Etsy site for physical products yet.
the patterns are All Really Really Cheap. that rose pattern i called 8$ is only 7usd on her site. the most expensive items i can find are 12$ and they're both bundles. One with 9 mini patterns the other with 16. you are getting a fucking Deal no matter which you buy by my estimate.
she has everything from like a million types of rose and from amaryllises to zinnias and she's making more patterns.
I was window shopping and well. If you were hesitant about trying a patty pattern bc money is Tight for everyone rn. Here's one that just straight up free because she discontinued the pattern collection it was a part of.
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