tannertan36
Not today Justin
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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RMH
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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Peter Solarz
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Love Begins
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Andulka
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Xuebing Du
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@one-chaotic-brain
Me reading academic papers: incoherent nonsense. Bullshit. I could write better than this in my sleep
Me writing academic papers: this sentence is 206 words long and contains 19 commas & a semicolon, fuck you
You either die with a bachelors degree or you stay in college long enough to watch yourself become the villain.
Chaotic Dropout here to say there is no good or evil – only em-dashes.
if you read in a frog paper “specimen was released in the field immediately after capture” chances are very good that what it actually means is
“i dropped the damn frog and despite the fact that we fell all over each other no one could recapture it”
sometimes when i am sad i go read through the tags on this post, because they are 70% other biologists saying things like “AND ALSO FUCK FIELD MICE” and “THAT CRAB ALMOST BROKE MY FINGER” and I am reassured that I am not the only one who has bobbled a wood frog right into their cleavage.
plus six or seven people who just….can’t figure out what a frog paper could possibly be. (guys it’s…a scientific paper. about frogs.)
and this one
which made me laugh despairingly because i mean
bro you don’t even know.
what is the code entomologists use for “i stepped on it, i’m so sorry, it was dark out and the specimen was very small”
“Impromptu dissection was performed under less-than-optimal lighting conditions.”
‘impromptu dissection’ is an alarming phrase in any context and i thank you for it
What’s biologist for “the little fucker BIT me and I yote it into the undergrowth on reflex”?
“Specimen was removed from the study pool due to abnormal interaction responses”
I am reblogging this 98% for the second to last comment holy shit I’m fucking choking
“Showed extreme vigour at release” in wildlife rehab and wildlife tagging studies/bird banding counts means “the asshole bit me and tried to attack my head when I let him go” so you guys know.
Though my favourite research bullshit story comes from a girl I met in university. Her thesis is on clove oil for pain relief and finding a way to make 99% pure clove essential oil for this purpose. They keep running trials but are getting 60-80% pure no matter how they calibrate the machine. Students being students decided to sneak into the lab at night and try make hash oil with this machine cause I think 25% is the most you can get even getting the extra potent medical kind even now. So students were like imagine even if it only comes out 60% we can get so high. While they are getting it ready to run and make super potent concentrated hash so literally one drop would get you high, someone dropped a glass vial and cut their hand on it bleeding over the machine. They cleaned up the blood and ran it with the cannabis and got 99% pure thc oil. The machine worked how it was supposed to. To hide evidence of having run weed through it they made a batch of clove oil and sure enough 99% pure. She told the prof she had an idea last night to try to get the machine working that still didn’t work but she had cut herself accidentally on some glass and bled on it a bit and she had run a test worried she broke the whole machine and it was 99% pure. The prof tried and again 99% pure. The machine just needed a blood sacrifice apparently. It was noted in the paper something about “additional lubrication of the (part of the machine that was bled on) was required to yield desired results following calibration” was how I broke into a lab to make hash oil on university equipment, bled over it, and somehow it worked to fix the problem was put into her paper.
I’m vaguely upset that it didn’t get referred to as a blood sacrifice to the machine in the academic paper.
This thread keeps getting better.
77. SQL
Reorganizing papers that he has no serious plans to read, the grad student engages in barely productive procrastination.
Purl | Pixar SparkShorts
Me: *Trying to get work done during a study session and then someone starts spilling department tea*
Academic culture is getting out of bed in the middle of the night because you finally figured out how to structure your paper and have to write it down before you fall asleep and forget it
I like my fellow-PhD friends.
We went from discussing the stock market to looking for cat cafes and back to working on our individual topics all in a span of 15 minutes.
Every library in london is dreamy, a series by me
Attending my fourth induction at the uni tomorrow, all in a span of two weeks. It’s like I simultaneously know nothing and everything.
But at least there’s free cake and coffee.
Barely 1 week into my PhD program and I’m already thinking about what I’m gonna do when I graduate.
It’s equal parts optimism and panic.
based off multiple personal experiences
I like how the welcome pack at the uni includes a stress ball.
Thanks, I’ll make sure to use it well.
First day at my university
...didn’t think it would involve this much walking. But it was fun.
Also, I think my supervisor forgot about me - not sure if that’s good or bad.
The thing with statistics - via
Numbers don’t lie but people can sure as fuck pick and choose the numbers they give you and phrase things to make them sound like they mean things they don’t
learn fucking stats or at least how they can hurt
As a wise man once said: There are lies, damned lies, and statistics.
@biologyweeps, relevant to your interests?
Extremely relevant, yes, and the reason why proper statistical treatment of numbers is so damn important.
crying in science is just like normal crying but you gotta do it at least 3 times in order to perform statistics
Just make sure the p-value is less than 0.05 or your tears won’t be statistically significant.
This seems like something everyone should know if they’re in the sciences and/or interested in reading scientific papers.
Also, Sci-Hub is totally not a thing that doesn’t allow you to access papers, so don’t even think of trying it. This isn’t the link, so don’t bookmark it: https://sci-hub.tw/
