My words are all I have

I just have words now even tho they fail me every now and then, they are all I have

[onewithwords]

It's funny as we grow up as we live life we forget some things and we learn some things and then remember old things it's just very weird

[onewithwords]

I wish I could carve myself with a chisel and a hammer the way I want to look

I wish I could cut and throw every part of my body I feel disgusted with

I wish I could shape myself so that I can dare to look in the mirror again

But I'm scared

I'm scared that if I start I might not leave even a percentage of my original self making myself someone who never existed ever

[onewithwords]

I don't want any part of me to be immortalized

I just wish to vanish from everyone's memories

It scares me but gives me peace that maybe they'll be happier without me maybe they'll be better off without me and just maybe they find someone good for them

Someone who I could never be

[onewithwords]

My heart has been broken a thousand times

I don't have a single heart but the leftover pieces of it and I

I love you with all of them

[onewithwords]

I wonder what you look like when you're in love how your eyes look when you're watching the person you love. I wonder if they are shining and full of love with hearts in their eyes and oh so deep and beautiful like the forest full of trees whose branches are brown and beautiful that they look like melted chocolate. I wonder what you look like when you're in love

[onewithwords]

Sadness is beautiful

Thriving in this dark world is brave

Accepting the ugly parts of us is progress, alas a great man once said

True sorrow and true beauty are both connected

P.S this is one of my old posts on another ac which I can't find anymore

[onewithwords]

Will my words ever reach you?

Will you ever know how much I love you?

Will you ever meet me before its too late for me to live?

Will we ever be fine.

[onewithwords]

Ignorance is a bliss people say but why do they fail to see that it can be worse than cruelty for some?

[onewithwords]

Pain also becomes memory

Will my pain also turn into one ?

[onewithwords]

You're still alive to me

You are still those little babies you were when we got you home

I'm still holding your memories in my soul

I'm still begging for you to forgive me

And I'll still beg for your forgiveness till my last breath

I love you. I miss you. I'm sorry

[onewithwords]

I do not know what I'm feeling,

Nope that's a lie ik what I'm feeling I just don't have the words to put them in order

I don't know how to use this vocabulary of mine to say what my heart, my body,my soul my very being feels.

[onewithwords]

In silence no one owns me but me

The living world annoys me with chatter but the world of silence becomes my refuge

[onewithwords]

Will I ever find someone who's my own

Someone who gets me just like that

Someone who doesn't pity me for my scars but someone who's proud of me for getting through it all

[onewithwords]

The tears didn't stop today,

The tears which I always held back refused to be held in,

The tears I desperately locked just kept flowing

But you still couldn't see me even when you were right in front of me