( * . ✧ ˙ ˖ — throat cut with diamonds...)

❝ the endless black depth never seemed so inviting, his lips equally enticing & he says it doesn't hurt when i bite, nothing hurts more than the bite of stolen pride, his tongue is silk and sin & his only words whispered, being in his bed does not mean being let in. . . ❞

[permanentlytragic]

the thing is: i wasn’t looking for anybody. i had decided that i was good all on my own; i didn’t need to find anybody, to become half of something, to set myself up to fall all over again. i thought my plan was foolproof: i would keep my head down, keep to myself, and exist alone. the thing is: my plan didn’t account for meeting you.

a.g. (via diffvse)

[otdsaervcn-blog]

otdminhyun:

“Well, I just stopped by in hopes you’d still be here, to be honest. But don’t wanna keep you when your shift is over, I can just come back tomorrow.” Minhyun replied, blushing a bit. He knew he should’ve arrived sooner. Ryun’s words made his eyebrows raise in question as he wondered what the other male was talking about. “Other part? What would that be?” He asked, looking up at the bartender.

“You came by just to see me?” ryun’s honey toned voice seeped out, his whole being perking up though he tried to fight the urge as his shocked eyes and fast snap of his head had him glancing at the other with a soft rosy blush on the apples of his cheeks, canine suppressing a soft smile on pink tinted sugar crusted lips. “no! i mean- i’d like it if you stayed...i’d like some company” ryun fumbled with his words desperately trying to keep his cool and not appear like seeing minhyun was the highlight of his evening (it was). “I-part time i double as an escort it was...the arrangement i was given when i was enrolled into west celestial but...it uh, doesn’t matter” he admitted with a slight dimmed down glaze back in his eye, minhyun would definitely look at him differently with that information in mind now and ryun would have to act like it didn’t bother him, would have to feel that inevitable fell swoop of disgust with who he was, what he did, the dull ache of bleakness that he’d foolishly but happily started letting minhyun diminish in him every time the other came around. 

[otdminjae-deactivated20180110]

minjae’s look was stern, face stone but his eyes were soft given his friends state. “don’t look at me like that,” minjae murmured, “i know you’re sorry, but..this has to stop,” he combed the elder’s hair from his face. “aren’t you tired?” he asked honestly placing the small bandage over the split in his lip smooth thumbs pressing down the plastic. “it’s hard not to , what if it’s worse next time? what if you don’t come home?” 

“they don’t care about your well being ryun, they can say whatever they want cause at the end of the day it’s their money, you have to be an idiot to really think you call the shots here. it’s all about revenue, you’re a product they don’t see you as a person,” he spat, and his anger only increased the iris’ of his eyes deeper in color, plum almost melting into coal. “No you don’t, you can work somewhere else, you can do something else, you don’t have to get back to anything. you want to and i can’t understand why you don’t care about yourself enough to leave that..that shit alone.”

[otdsaervcn-blog]

ryun tensed under the gaze and scruffed a hand through already messy hair, eyes downcast. “like what?” he whispered voice somewhat strained and broken as he pulled himself up and went to get a wet cloth as well as a drink of some sort to soothe the raw ache. “this isn’t all the time” he attempts to distill the current of anger rising in the other, it was true most of the time ryun was treated with his boundaries respected and it wasn’t too often people actually asked for the escort side of his job deal but he could sense the argument with his best friend coming no matter what now. “ my body is, emotionally too i guess but...i want to be with you” he sighed as he fought but ended up leaning into the others touch anyway. 

“don’t min, don’t do that. i know you’re angry okay, i know seeing me like this is hard for you but you getting agitated about it all isn’t going to help or fix anything, its a waste of your energy and i don’t want to fight” he muttered out weakly, pinching the bridge of his nose, trying his hardest to resist flinching at the others harsh tone. “you know it isn’t that simple, you know if it was i wouldn’t be like this. i don’t choose this, i know you don’t actually think i enjoy being used” he said voice steady, teeth gritted as he attempted not to let those words get under his skin and wound him, practially golden eyes blinking drearily back. 

“you know me, you’re the only person who does...you’re right about me not giving a shit about myself but its not a want to be this...fucking shameful mess,this human sex toy its just- its all i know you don’t think i’m ashamed of myself? of course i am, i let them do this to me because i have nothing else to offer. i’m a disgrace and a mockery to aphrodite’s bloodline, i’m...i disgust myself, since i was a kid i’ve been nothing more than my body and even now i can’t stop myself from letting everyone reduce to me that even when i think im turning it around” he sighs softly, pure exhaustion making him sway on his feet. “please, i don’t want to think about it all right now min...i just want my best friend okay? i want this to change just as much as you do and it will but not tonight”

[otdsaervcn-blog]

otdminho:

Minho stared at the pretty bartender not really knowing exactly what he was talking about. “I was just asking if I could have one more drink before I head out. If you’re closing up then I can just close my tab and go. It’s no big deal.”  Minho hated being that last person to order. It reminded him of all of the last minute people who’d run into his shop asking to get tattooed an hour before closing up. He looked over at the young man and he couldn’t stop his eyes from lingering over his body. He was beautiful. He was right up there with Minjae on his list of drop dead gorgeous people. “What’s your name?”

Ryun looked back at the other with full pouty lips, before arching a perfect brow and sauntering back behind the bar, already getting out the things he’d need. “no it’s fine, one more drink won’t hurt anyone besides its cold out might as well have one to warm you up for the journey home” he shrugged as he gestured to the drink in question of what the other was looking for, his attention divided as he lounged against the bar and then glanced at the other considerably. “Saeryun, yours?” he replied vaguely, curiosity peeked at the others boldness to actually inquire but due to how he was as a person ryun still remained somewhat distanced and abrupt, it would take more than that for this stranger to break his walls down. 

[otdsaervcn-blog]

otdminjae:

“I don’t know who I should kill first, you or the bastard who did this to you,” Minjae’s voice bit sharply into the dim air of their shared apartment. It was far to late in the night to have all the lights on at once, and at the time of Ryun’s arrival Minjae had been getting ready for bed. He pulled his robe back up over his shoulder, the silk gliding softly against his tanned skin as he sighed, helping his friend out of the clothing. Furious was an understatement, the iris’ of Minjae’s eyes bore a deep plum, mixed with an electric violet and he was too close to hunting the guy down and snapping his neck. So he opted for treating his best friends injuries.

“Don’t sit here and pretend like it’s your fault,” he said softly, the cool towel settling on one of the welts, “you could be an escort all your life and no one will ever be allowed to do this to you.” Minjae said placing the ice pack on one of the rather large bruises, “I want you to stay home for awhile…please? We don’t need the money, and even if we did the shop is doing well, you can afford to take a few days off,”

“well i’d prefer not to die quite yet but it might put me out of my misery” he murmured in response both looking and sounding completely beat down as he watched the other readjust his robe and smiled apologetically, his features soft and eyes tender to express that he regretted the burden he had to sometimes be on his best friend, all he wanted was to be his roommate and platonic soul half but at times like these it was like a stray dog forcing themselves on someone. his shoulders visibly loosened though when the other began to much more carefully and attentively take away the clothing. his hand reached out to gently stroke through the others hair as he stared into fiery violet eyes. “don’t let it get under your skin min, it was just some low life he’s the one who’s worse off for it truly”

“I - sorry I know you hate that i just...they said i’d be in control but i can never truly own my own body in this line of work and sometimes i feel foolish for settling and agreeing because i was too helpless to argue i might be good elsewhere” he sighed softly and hissed ever so silently at that cool wet against the stinging welt. “they’re so much...bigger than me and powerful and once i offer myself up...thats it, they can make me vulnerable and take the power right out from me” he bit his lip and stared intensely at the floor to not appear weak as he reflected. “Min...fine but only because its recovery time, any other time I’d say no i have to go back eventually and do it all again. but if it makes you feel better i’ll stay home, now tell me about you, what made you happy today and then i’ll feel ten times better” 

[otdsaervcn-blog]

FEEL

FEEL. -How does your character react to a persons touch? A random stranger’s? A loved one’s? A friend’s?

Ryun is okay with touch but if its sudden or unexpected he will have an instinct to flinch or tense/stiffen up and his posture becomes very rigid and he just becomes like a voodoo doll ready to be used for play really because he’s so used to that touch meaning behave and sit pretty while i have my way with you. if its a loved one...he wouldn’t know because he’s never had any as of yet but he’d like to think it would be the one thing that could melt his core in a good way. and as for a friend, minjae often gives reassuring touches and platonic cuddling or spooning and cleans him up after his bodies been used for escorting so he is more than happy with certain individuals doing that but they have to be very very close friends. 

[otdsaervcn-blog]

element, fear, yah

ELEMENT. -What is your muse “made of”, what is their character like? Courageous, loving, scared, etc.

I would say that Ryun is made up of a lot of complicated mixtures and combination he’s both loving and indifferent, devoted and distanced, careless and fiercely protective. he cares a lot for others but not enough for himself and there is definitely plenty hes scared of though he acts like hes in control of it all for the people he cares for sakes. 

FEAR. -What are your muses biggest fears?

Ryun is mostly afraid of never truly experiencing love or being able to use his powers and gifts from his bloodline for more than renting himself out, he feels its shameful and a wasted use to put his powers to like hes mocking or letting down other aphrodite children. he is afraid he’ll never be able to fully be in control of himself or be more than his body because he was born with lust as such a huge part of him and he’s afraid that will lead to his walls never truly breaking down.

YAH. -Something your muse agrees on 100% of the time.

you are more than your body, in just about any context ryun is a huge activist but feels very strongly towards that particular perspective because he relates so deeply to it himself. 

[hynpos]

You think “divine” means perfection, but perfect what? Beauty, cruelty, or both?

the gods are not kind (via hynpos)

[joeguk]

an actual fairy

[trippingeyes]

[chinaofrps-deactivated20180604]

camisado // panic! at the disco

[sheriff--cait-deactivated201810]

“DAMN.” Questions for Muses.

BLOOD. -What types of injuries has your muse sustained? What was the worst? 

DNA. -What was your muses home life like?

YAH. -Something your muse agrees on 100% of the time.

ELEMENT. -What is your muse “made of”, what is their character like? Courageous, loving, scared, etc.

FEEL. -How does your character react to a persons touch? A random stranger’s? A loved one’s? A friend’s?

LOYALTY. -Does your character have any loyalty to any group?

PRIDE. -What is your muses biggest flaw?

HUMBLE. -How does your muse handle praise?

LUST. -Who does your muse find attractive?

LOVE. -Does your muse have a “special someone”

XXX. -What’s the raunchiest thing your muse has ever done?

FEAR. -What are your muses biggest fears?

GOD. -Does your muse believe in a god? If so, describe it.

DUCKWORTH. -Has your muse ever thought about committing or committed a crime?

[otdsaervcn-blog]

“ actually i just finished my shift...but i could hang around if you really need ” ryun informs as he finishes up cleaning the used glasses and restocking the alcohol. “ or if you’re here for the other part...” he tacked on with a sigh as he swept his fringe away from his eyes and threw a glance over his shoulder, pleasantly surprised when he found it wasn’t a client. that meant he wouldn’t be coming home tonight with his body totally wrecked, his exhaustion piqued mentally and physically and saved him from having minjae worrying himself too much. “ ah, good you’re not here for that. what can i do for you ? ” 

[otdsaervcn-blog]

( CLOSED FOR : @otdminjae​ )

“ i know it looks bad but...” ryun trailed off at that point, no idea how to finish a sentence that was incorrect in the first place, it looked bad because it was bad. he was covered in scars, bruises and sore welts. usually he had control over his escorting business now he lived in yeoshin but the occasional client came in who could abuse the rules and even ryun was powerless to do anything much to protect himself at those times despite officially being given the ‘control’. he groaned and yelped sharply when he pulled off the all too revealing and uncomfortable tight clothing that stung against his marks. changing into a loose fitted white silken shirt and finally meeting minjae’s astounded and rare to see but all the more fierce for it, face of rage. “ i...min i know what you’re gonna say but this is...i let it happen by letting them convince me to keep escorting ” that was almost definitely the wrong thing to say. by far blaming himself would upset minjae more than the condition he’d been left in but he didn’t know how to ease the others pain at his suffering as he uneasily let himself slip onto the couch.

[somebodytodiefor]

Liability by Lorde

[otdsaervcn-blog]

hello random citizens, i’m eli and i am 17 in the GMT timezone, i use they/them pronouns. let me introduce to you the one and only chwe saeryun also known as ryun and a child of both ares and aphrodite ( he only knows of his heritage from aphrodite thus far ) . under the cut you can get to know him more and if interested in the meantime take a look at STATS and PLOTS (the page isn’t up yet but feel free to message me anyway or like and i’ll message you). 

ryun is twenty one and a student at west celestial while also working part time as a bartender who on the side will do the job of escorting to fit his power and keep true to his roots. he is roommates with minjae who has been the only person ryun has truly let in so far and trusted with himself to completely surround and enamor himself with. 

he is gay, very very gay and on the slight parallel to what this discovery usually means it actually empowered him as his sexuality was something ryun could fully feel in control of and a constant in his life. 

his powers are  Amokinesis. he can sense and manipulate all the aspects of love, whether by increasing, decreasing, causing or otherwise channeling love, even manifesting the emotional energy to physical level. & Subliminal Seduction, a more tampered down version of sexual inducement meaning he can project seductive thoughts into subconscious and/or otherwise seduce subjects.

mostly ryun feels totally confident in himself now and comfortable, more like the idealized version of aphrodite that is painted in mythology and less like the hidden darker parts, though he’ll never forget those and wants to get vengeance against those who tortured him with full intention to ( little does he know this is where ares blood is running through him ) but he still suffers with insomnia, anxiety and gets somewhat rigid if he is touched or advanced on unexpectedly.  

ryun was born in a brothel, he never got a chance to know his mother because straight after birth he was taken from her and to be raised by the women in charge of the institute. he doesn’t know what happened to her since he was never allowed to see her but he expects they deemed her worthless after his birth and got her addicted till she overdosed by moving her to the department where the women were drugged. he’ll feel guilty over that till he dies. 

he was moved to the male department as soon as he was legal and knew from very early on he was to be a toy for the governors and heads of the institute as well as clients but never expected that being young and a child of the goddess of desire would mean the men he worked alongside also targeted him. he was a favorite and ryun never knew love, never knew this behavior could be wrong, he wasn’t to be a fortunate child of aphrodite. 

he was forced into a marriage with a high paying and long time client and business owner, whom he never saw unless it was to warm his bed but it meant that he would be out of the brothel occasionally, it meant that they earned more money on his behalf, it made him valuable and kept him earning a place in his poor excuse of a home when he had nowhere else to go. 

furthermore, learning he was to be grateful for his torture being pleasure and of the mental kind when he saw the fiance act upon his violence, putting saeryun through torture of the sexual kind and gratification while also forcing him to sit pretty and be restrained as he was made to watch the violent gruesome acts his suitor would exemplify, threatened with these punishments himself.

he was kicked out one night for agreeing to pleasure someone who said they would pleasure him equally and being caught in the mutually beneficial exchange, a night that did not consist of penetration or the tasks that he had been assigned to pleasure the client with, that he found himself on the streets and not allowed back, the man spitting and laughing in his face as he was informed there had been suspicions all along he was unloyal to his work and that it had been a ploy from the start, he took after his mother well, played the dumb pretty blonde so accordingly.

it was shortly after this that he was found and told he was to be enrolled in West Celestial to keep him safe and show him how life should be, set him on the right track once again. he was taken under the mentors wing, put into therapy and set up with a life that would leave him in control also cutting off his marriage entirely. 

realizing the value of letting saeryun follow what he already knew as well, he was told to rename himself ryun, to embrace his sexuality and power instead of distinguish it. given majors that would help him learn more about himself and how to treat his body so that it would benefit him to do the job he knew and the life he’d been raised in, landed a job as a bartender whilst being an escort. under heavy protection, a prized investment but fully in charge of who, where when and how he benefited his clientele.

[armycissima]

★ Images: @kimtaehyung_net | @V_TAC1230 | @becauseofV95 | @TAETAELAND

[honeymixstore]