paper-thin-wallflower

18. She/her. Interested in alot of stuff

[thebibliosphere]

I’ll never not be amused by the fact that I can drop the words “crucifix nail nipples” into a conversation and some of you who have been with me since the livejournal days will join me in the flashbacks, screaming and crying all the way.

[hadanelith]

I require context. Because this is a very interesting start of a story, and now I need the rest of it. Could I get a link, or a summary, or something? Pretty please?

[thebibliosphere]

All right buckle the fuck up kids, it’s the year 2012 and I’ve just been handed what should be an easy editing gig by my senior editor. It’s a vampire erotica story because one of the final Twilight movies is about to come out, and everything is vampires. Everything. I haven’t edited a single thing in months which isn’t about vampires. I am ready, I can do this. So I open the file and notice there’s a typo in the title, which really should have been my first inkling that something horrendous was about to go down, but you see I’m not quite dead inside yet so I carry on, bushy tailed and bright eyed with my faith in humanity intact. It’ll be dead by page 24, but I don’t know that yet. I’m just editing one more vampire boner fest.

The MC is a girl who we’ll call Sue. Sue is a Good Girl™, Sue is Not Like Other Girls™, she is pale and awkward and a virgin and has somehow managed to find herself a Bad Boy™ for a boyfriend. We’ll call him Dickhead.

Now Dickhead as previously stated is a bit of dick, he tries to pressure Sue into sex because he knows she is The One™ but he loves her really so it’s okay. Except it’s not okay because Sue is a Good Girl™ and holding out till marriage which he’s fine with except he’s got such a bad case of blue balls that one night walking home an attractive stranger lures him into an alley with the words “hey stud” and he follows, dick out before she’s even finished her sentence. Well turns out that was a mistake for Dickhead because she’s a vampire, but not just any vampire, a Dick Biting Vampire. So what started out as a skeevy blow job behind a club that he’ll feel bad about in the morning, turns into him being bitten on the dick and drained of his life essence and left for dead. Except DBV fucked up and now he’s a vampire. Are you still with me? Good, cause it’s about to get weirder.

Realizing he is now an abomination, Dickhead flees, becoming a creature of the night and feeding on animals rather than humans to repent for being such an asshole in life. Sue meanwhile is heartbroken, but carries on valiantly with her life and goes to bed each night crying for the loss of her One True Love™ who she would do anything to bring back. Well guess what Sue, Dickhead never really left you! He’s been “instinctively protecting her from rapists” by hiding out on her roof and fighting hobos who try to get to her open window via the fire escape for months now. Because that’s not fucking terrifying at all.

Upon learning of his predicament and how it happened, Sue can do nothing but blame herself. Oh if only she’d let him touch her secret places, then perhaps all of this could be avoided! Meanwhile Dickhead is having another dilemma of his own, realizing too late that his vampire powers have given him super senses and now he can smell her blood and he can’t decide whether he wants to get with her or eat her. And I don’t mean in the French sense. But he is strong! And over comes his base manly vampire instincts and neither rapes not kills her. Hurrah! And this is so romantic that Sue gives it up, but not before she launches into a theory about how in all fairy tales, True Love saves the day, so maybe her magical pure vagina that has never been touched by anyone, not even her, can bring him back to life. So Dickhead being a dickhead agrees and rips her clothes off, but not before he takes one last moment to marvel at the beauty of her purity, because he will never again look on her again and know she is Pure.

If you’ve only vomited once by now, I applaud your resolve.

So they hop on the good foot and do the nasty, except she is literally so pure in spirit, her flesh burns his. And I quote you from memory because these words are burned into my soul: “her breasts bit into his hands, like crucifix nail nipples tearing at his flesh, but he did not care because he loved her so and couldn’t stop”

This phrase haunts me. I dread that it will be the last thing I think about on my death bed and my last words will literally be “god fucking dammit” as I die, carrying that mental image with me into the afterlife. My own solace is in knowing that I inflicted it on other people too, like @ahzuri who is somehow still with me after all these years.

When the magical burning sex fails to heal him and leaves her bruised, battered and broken with “a dainty blue bells of bruises around her secret flower” (I am genuinely quoting this, I could never make something as horrendous as this up without being on acid) Dickhead leaves. Yeah. Off he fucks, leaving her to the mercy of the hobos at her window, and into the night to be the true monster he really is. But wait, there’s more. Remember the dick biting vampire? Well turns out she has figured out she made him into a vampire and has also been stalking HIM and is totally jealous of Sue, so tries to kill her. But again Sues Purity saves her, because sex before marriage which was done out of True Love is not a sin, so she is still a spiritual virgin and I’ll be honest, I started drinking heavily at this point and it’s all a bit of a blur.

A fight ensues some pages later after Dickhead returns, realizing the mistake he has made. And he rescues Sue from the Dick Biter, but not before he assaults Dick Biter, and calls her a slut for luring innocent men into alleys cuts her heart out by cutting her breasts off, at which point i screamed “THAT’S NOT HOW YOU REACH THE HEART” and my brain short circuited completely and I have no idea how it ends because I realized there was 30 pages left and my soul couldn’t take it. I emailed the chief editor like ?????!!!!!!????!!!!!! and the book was immediately pulled from the work line and the author dismissed from the publishing house. Turns out she was a friend of a friend and that was how she got the manuscript past our entry levels for requirement.

And that’s the story of how an author sent me death threats for over a month because I stopped her shitty vampire porn from ever seeing the light of day. You’re all fucking WELCOME.

[thebibliosphere]

Happy ten year anniversary to this fucking post 😂

[sighinastorm]

I hope the author finds this post one day, has a great sense of humor about it, and submits the manuscript (which she wrote as a teenager) for all our lulz.

[thebibliosphere]

I can tell you, she absolutely does not have a sense of humor about anything, lol. At the time when this happened they had to change my company email because she was sending me unhinged death threats from multiple Gmail accounts for “sabotaging” her life’s work. She was also at the time, in her 30s.

That was on top of the prior abusive emails she sent demanding to know why I’d changed things in her perfect manuscript. Like, y'know, grammatical errors and typos. Or her batshit concepts of human anatomy.

I also regret to inform everyone in the notes discovering this for the first time and wanting to believe this was satire, it was actually Christian Erotica (which is actually a very profitable sub-category of the genre).

This was a wholly sincere attempt at writing scintillating sex.

Also, to the people ten years ago who said I was a mean hater and said I couldn’t do better? Fucking bet, lmao.

[wenzelsays]

Lengths Gone

dcxdp fic idea

"I got it!" Sam yelled.

"what?"

"We charge Batman with Felony Murder!"

"ya ok" "good one Sam"

"No, guys. Listen, I'm serious. Under the law Danny's being charged with Felony Murder because their a bunch of ectophobic assholes and think because Danny is the king of the dead and technically responsible for turning the portal on they can charge him with every crime ghosts have committed and Danny's own death. But by that same measure Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman- all of them would be responsible for deaths committed by people that they saved. So we get Batman charged with Felony Murder, there's bound to be corrupt cops in Gotham, and let the media circus bring attention to the crime. Worst case he looks into who got the charges filed and we get him on our doorstep-"

"Which we all agreed we didn't want-" Tucker interjected.

"-which gets him on our doorstep and gives us a chance to defend ourselves. He would come looking. We wouldnt be going to him, so he would have already done all his background checking and would suspect us of anything."

----

"Felony murder? but you didn't kill anyone B-man!"

"That seems to be the point Dick."

"That can't arrest Batman for NOT killing someone‽‽"

"It appears that they can hold Batman responsible for the deaths of any who have died at the hands of someone whose life he has saved Master Grayson," Alfred said.

"But that's crazy! by that standard they could arrest every hero on the planet!"

"I think that's the point Dick."

"Who came up with this crazy idea anyway? No one on the force is smart enough for this. Who gave them the idea?"

"We're working on it."

[ficauthor]

[akemi2003]

Fic prompt 69

Dpxdc

Do you all remember that episode of Danny Phantom where he finds out the “last male” purple gorilla is actually female and basically saves the entire species? (Yes, you do).

So. Consider this:

What if after that whole incident Danny realizes it wasn’t a one-off. It wasn’t just ghost empathy or a fluke. He actually understands animals. Like—full comprehension. Not vibes. Not guesswork. Actual body language processing.

At first he thinks it’s just ghost-adjacent nonsense. Some weird liminal side effect of being half-dead. But then he starts noticing patterns. Birds arguing about territory. Stray dogs giving eyewitness accounts. Rats with municipal-level gossip networks.

And once he severs ties with Amity Park (because let’s be honest, that town does not deserve him), he doesn’t go full broody hermit. He does something smarter.

Sam absolutely clocks the ethical implications immediately.

“Danny, this isn’t just a power. This is regulatory leverage.”

So with her pushing him (and probably handling the paperwork because you know he would not), he goes legit. Registers as a consultant. Animal behavioral analysis, ecological assessment, investigative audits. Zoos. Factory farms. Research facilities. Private estates.

Except he’s not analyzing behavior.

He’s taking testimony.

And suddenly exposés start dropping. Facilities shut down. Conditions improve overnight because word spreads fast in human spaces when a meta-human can walk into a building and say, very calmly:

“The tigers would like to discuss your ventilation system.”

He becomes a little famous. Not flashy Justice League famous. More like whispered-in-elite-circles famous. The kind of person corporations get nervous about.

Which is how he ends up in Gotham.

Cut to:

Danny standing in front of Wayne Manor after speaking to one of the Wayne pets.

He’s polite. Unbothered.

“Hi. So. Your bats asked me to visit.”

And somewhere deep in the Batcave, several hundred bats are absolutely losing their minds because FINALLY someone is listening.

Bruce is suspicious. Obviously.

Danny is just there like, “Sir, your microchiroptera community has notes. Mostly about the acoustics. Also one of them thinks you’re emotionally constipated.”

And honestly?

That’s how the Wayne family gets a consultant who doesn’t need hacking skills to uncover secrets.

He just asks the wildlife.

[decadentsoultheorist]

A bat landed on Danny's shoulder and immediately started chittering.

Danny: "Mmm..." *nods*

Danny: "I see..."

Danny: "He, the bat, just said you're too emotionally constipated." *slides down his sunglasses and looks at Bruce judgingly* "Might want to start talking to a psychiatrist or something. You're stressing out the bats."

[akemi2003]

Fic prompt 69

Dpxdc

Do you all remember that episode of Danny Phantom where he finds out the “last male” purple gorilla is actually female and basically saves the entire species? (Yes, you do).

So. Consider this:

What if after that whole incident Danny realizes it wasn’t a one-off. It wasn’t just ghost empathy or a fluke. He actually understands animals. Like—full comprehension. Not vibes. Not guesswork. Actual body language processing.

At first he thinks it’s just ghost-adjacent nonsense. Some weird liminal side effect of being half-dead. But then he starts noticing patterns. Birds arguing about territory. Stray dogs giving eyewitness accounts. Rats with municipal-level gossip networks.

And once he severs ties with Amity Park (because let’s be honest, that town does not deserve him), he doesn’t go full broody hermit. He does something smarter.

Sam absolutely clocks the ethical implications immediately.

“Danny, this isn’t just a power. This is regulatory leverage.”

So with her pushing him (and probably handling the paperwork because you know he would not), he goes legit. Registers as a consultant. Animal behavioral analysis, ecological assessment, investigative audits. Zoos. Factory farms. Research facilities. Private estates.

Except he’s not analyzing behavior.

He’s taking testimony.

And suddenly exposés start dropping. Facilities shut down. Conditions improve overnight because word spreads fast in human spaces when a meta-human can walk into a building and say, very calmly:

“The tigers would like to discuss your ventilation system.”

He becomes a little famous. Not flashy Justice League famous. More like whispered-in-elite-circles famous. The kind of person corporations get nervous about.

Which is how he ends up in Gotham.

Cut to:

Danny standing in front of Wayne Manor after speaking to one of the Wayne pets.

He’s polite. Unbothered.

“Hi. So. Your bats asked me to visit.”

And somewhere deep in the Batcave, several hundred bats are absolutely losing their minds because FINALLY someone is listening.

Bruce is suspicious. Obviously.

Danny is just there like, “Sir, your microchiroptera community has notes. Mostly about the acoustics. Also one of them thinks you’re emotionally constipated.”

And honestly?

That’s how the Wayne family gets a consultant who doesn’t need hacking skills to uncover secrets.

He just asks the wildlife.

[decadentsoultheorist]

A bat landed on Danny's shoulder and immediately started chittering.

Danny: "Mmm..." *nods*

Danny: "I see..."

Danny: "He, the bat, just said you're too emotionally constipated." *slides down his sunglasses and looks at Bruce judgingly* "Might want to start talking to a psychiatrist or something. You're stressing out the bats."

[akemi2003]

Fic prompt 69

Dpxdc

Do you all remember that episode of Danny Phantom where he finds out the “last male” purple gorilla is actually female and basically saves the entire species? (Yes, you do).

So. Consider this:

What if after that whole incident Danny realizes it wasn’t a one-off. It wasn’t just ghost empathy or a fluke. He actually understands animals. Like—full comprehension. Not vibes. Not guesswork. Actual body language processing.

At first he thinks it’s just ghost-adjacent nonsense. Some weird liminal side effect of being half-dead. But then he starts noticing patterns. Birds arguing about territory. Stray dogs giving eyewitness accounts. Rats with municipal-level gossip networks.

And once he severs ties with Amity Park (because let’s be honest, that town does not deserve him), he doesn’t go full broody hermit. He does something smarter.

Sam absolutely clocks the ethical implications immediately.

“Danny, this isn’t just a power. This is regulatory leverage.”

So with her pushing him (and probably handling the paperwork because you know he would not), he goes legit. Registers as a consultant. Animal behavioral analysis, ecological assessment, investigative audits. Zoos. Factory farms. Research facilities. Private estates.

Except he’s not analyzing behavior.

He’s taking testimony.

And suddenly exposés start dropping. Facilities shut down. Conditions improve overnight because word spreads fast in human spaces when a meta-human can walk into a building and say, very calmly:

“The tigers would like to discuss your ventilation system.”

He becomes a little famous. Not flashy Justice League famous. More like whispered-in-elite-circles famous. The kind of person corporations get nervous about.

Which is how he ends up in Gotham.

Cut to:

Danny standing in front of Wayne Manor after speaking to one of the Wayne pets.

He’s polite. Unbothered.

“Hi. So. Your bats asked me to visit.”

And somewhere deep in the Batcave, several hundred bats are absolutely losing their minds because FINALLY someone is listening.

Bruce is suspicious. Obviously.

Danny is just there like, “Sir, your microchiroptera community has notes. Mostly about the acoustics. Also one of them thinks you’re emotionally constipated.”

And honestly?

That’s how the Wayne family gets a consultant who doesn’t need hacking skills to uncover secrets.

He just asks the wildlife.

[decadentsoultheorist]

A bat landed on Danny's shoulder and immediately started chittering.

Danny: "Mmm..." *nods*

Danny: "I see..."

Danny: "He, the bat, just said you're too emotionally constipated." *slides down his sunglasses and looks at Bruce judgingly* "Might want to start talking to a psychiatrist or something. You're stressing out the bats."

[sunflowers-and-scales]

“this character did not act in the most objectively logical way possible!” is not ! actually valid literary criticism

[sunflowers-and-scales]

i have trust that the media literacy enjoyers will find this one idk

[acceptableduraz]

[rheitais]

Superman: Please, we aren't trying to hurt you.

Sam, holding a krpyonite knife: Right, so where's Danny?

Superman: How did you even get that- We are looking for your lost friend!

Paulina: If the stupid dork isn't back in our circle in the next 30 minutes so help me!

Flash: Um Supes- no sign of that kid.

Tucker: THEY LOST HIM!!

Superman: WHOO HE DIDN'T SAY THAT!

Flash: Yeah I mean we are still searching— WHERE DID YOU GET A DOOR FROM?!

Dash: Shit I missed-

Valerie: Try throwing it with a curve next time. I'll make it hit.

Flash: Can we not throw doors?! THAT WAS A CAR DOOR????

Superman: Um, sir could you please. You are their guardian yes?

Mr. Lancer: Students.

Casper Students: Yeah?

Mr. Lancer: Try aiming a little higher, the red one is faster. This guy is not really much help if they can't find our own.

Sam: HA PERMISSION FROM TEACH!

Superman: WHAT?!

Meanwhile

Danny: What?

Batman: Where are your parents?

Danny: Where are yours?

Robin! Jason: .... *Trying hard not to laugh*

Nightwing: BWAHAHAHGAA

Wonder Wonder: Batman?

Batman, deflated completely: Hm.

Danny: This is what I get for having a terrible sense of direction.

Dabble inspired by Rabies and Hunting

[Masterpost]

[something-or-other47]

i was told you freaks would love this

[sillychillidog]

"sir theres been a second outage"

[something-or-other47]

YOU CANT BE FUNNIER THAN ME ON MY OWN POST THAT I DREAMED ABOUT ITS NOT ALLOWED

[alien-slushie]

DpxDc Crack AU

Heavily inspired by 'Sleepy Princess in the Demon Castle'

The JL had to deal with a Ghost/Realms Being and gets their butts handed to them. Phantom, an up an coming Ancient, steps in to seal the Ghost back up. Bruce, wanting to he better prepared, has Constantine reach out via Ouija to temporarily arrest a Realms Being, and by pure chance gets Phantom, the one who saves them. Considering Phantom saved them, the JL feel super guilty about inprisoning the Ghost Boy, but if another Ghost comes through and attacks, they really need to know how to deal with them so the JL tries their hardest to make Danny's imprisonment as pleasant as possible.

Thing is, Danny is in no way contained.

Danny thinks this whole thing is a a hoot. He's been super stressed lately adjusting the power surge growing into an ancient causes, and all the work he has to do has really been draining- so Being "trapped" by these humans in spandex is a lot of fun, and seems like a great vacation!

Basically-

Justice League "catches" phantom in an attempt to be prepared for any other Realms Being, and Danny, who needs a wants to relax and is 100% not contained, uses his incarnation as a vacation. And may or may not toy with the humans occasionally.

[golittleghostlittleghostgo]

He falls to his knees

"My King," Jason breathes. Where the words are coming from, he doesn't know. All he knows is the pull in his chest, the whisper in the back of his head, the feeling of complete and utter rightness curling around him, sinking into his skin.

"My Knight," comes the echoing answer, awed and crooning. The voice hums through the air, and Jason nearly closes his eyes in bliss. He could have waited eternity to hear that voice; would, still, if that's what it took to hear it again.

The being- white hair, green eyes, sharp teeth, long, spindly limbs- pushes through the barrier Constantine had sewn so painstakingly into the edges of the summoning circle, working desperately to avert catastrophe as he called for the entire Justice League Light, Dark, and anyone else on hand to get their asses in gear and be prepared for a dimension-wide catastrophe.

Passing through the watery veil that shimmers in and out of sight, barely visible and not quite there, seems to pain the being, if the desperate way they claw at it and the grimace twisting their face is any indication.

Rage howls through Jason at the sight. He wants to eliminate the threat, draw his guns and shoot until Constantine's insides become his outsides and the whole damn League know never to so much as dare look his King's way in malice ever again, but something holds him back.

He hasn't been given the order to move. His King wants to come to him- is coming to him- and Jason will be damned if he moves a single inch before his King gets whatever he wants from him, however he wants it.

Two cool hands cup his cheeks, and Jason melts into the hold, his whole body leaning forward, straining for this being like a flower to sunlight. His King takes mercy on him, pressing their foreheads together with a soothing rumble that Jason doesn't hear so much as feel, doesn't feel so much as become submersed in; everywhere all at once.

Something clicks into place inside his own self, deeper than conscious thought, where the All-Blades rest. An hiccough struggles out from that same place in answer to his King's call, cracked and wheezing, snuffed out as soon as it starts.

It's so distressing, in that moment, that a strained whine falls from his physical lips instead, aching in his throat, searing the inside of his skin with the wrong kind of heat.

That crooning, again. A hand lifts away from his face- no, please- to stroke across his brow instead; to thread through his hair. Jason relaxes once more.

"My Knight," the being says, still rumbling that sound that felt dangerously like a purr, and Jason thinks, out of nowhere but entirely serious, that if Damian is ever granted the honour of hearing his King in such a state, he may actually have to kill him. "I missed you."

Jason bites back a sob. He knows what the being means. Until this moment, he never realized what it was he was missing, didn't realize he was missing anything at all, but now that he's been near his King, has heard him and seen him and is, even now, feeling his touch, he knows that he'll go the rest of his life conscious of that space inside him, empty whenever the being isn't near.

"Missed you, too," Jason dares to say, presumptuous as it may be, and is rewarded with a soft sound like the chuff of a big cat or the throaty ringing of a distant gong, carried on the wind. And a smile. One that curls across the being's face, full of far too many teeth.

It's uncanny, but Jason doesn't care. He can't imagine feeling anything but safe with his King. Has he ever felt like this? Maybe when he was a child, so small he could be wrapped up and tucked against his mother's chest, so small neither his mind nor his body remembers.

"My Knight. I would know your name, if you would tell me."

"Jason," Jason replies immediately. If the being wants his name, his loyalty, his eternal soul and servitude, he'll give it willingly. He already has. "My name is Jason, my King. Jason Todd." He hesitates, then adds, in a much smaller voice than he means to, "Some call me the Red Hood."

The soft touch of a nose brushes the side of his, and any apprehension drains out of him at the affectionate gesture. "Which do you prefer, My Knight?"

"Jason, please," Jason requests, nudging his nose shyly against the being's in return, prompting a renewal of the purring sensation from before, loud and vibrant. It settles like sunlight in Jason's bones. "Hood is better when I'm in the mask. Helmet. This."

The being chuckles. "I am known as Phantom, My Knight." Lowering his voice, which is already low and private, into a whisper that Jason is sure he wouldn't be able to hear if he wasn't quite literally cheek to cheek with Phantom, and coming ever closer to being definitively in his King's lap with every passing moment, Phantom says, "But between just the two of us, I would be glad if you called me Danny. It was my name, when I could be counted among the living."

Jason's breath caught in his throat. He wanted to know, burned with it like a need; the desire to hear and understand everything, straight from the source, from Phantom's- Danny's- own tongue.

As if sensing his curiosity, Phantom laughs softly, that resonant, bell-like sound. "Another time, My Knight. Not to worry, you and I will have plenty of it. But for now, I think your colleagues, perhaps, are getting quite anxious. We should settle their fears."

Blinking out of the warm bubble of emotion he allowed himself to slip into without thought or hesitation, Jason looks around to see that, yes, the entirety of the Justice League is in fact launching a cohesive and targeted attack at a glowing green dome surrounding him and Phantom.

When Jason looks to him, he simply quirks a small smile. "For the initial Bonding, I thought it better that we remain undisturbed." His expression doesn't visibly change, but Jason feels a troubled ripple stretch across the space between them, feels it stream through his body and pluck at something far deeper.

It makes him shiver, to be brushed and caressed so intimately in that place that's never known any touch but his own.

He doesn't hate it.

(If he lets himself think about how badly he wants more of it, he'll do something both foolish and irrevocable.)

"There is yet more to discuss, My Knight, but I would hear it from your own lips, and I would that you should hear it from mine. Until then, know only one thing, if you can believe nothing else: You are Mine, and I will always, always protect what is Mine."

Jason nods dumbly, because he can feel it, the strength of Phantoms determination and conviction, his absolute willingness to follow through on that statement, and the bottomless, bitingly cold well of power that Jason knows makes it not an idle statement, but a testament; immutable fact.

"Ready, My Knight?" Phantom asks, with the barest hint of a tease, and all the warmth of the life-giving yellow sun.

"Yes, My King," he says, because even if he wasn't, he thinks would follow Phantom anywhere. No hesitation, no doubt.

The green dome thins, wafting away into nothing, and together, they step forward into the unknown.

[arosafee]

"Ahh, Who the hell are you!?" Duke exclaimed bewildered, as he fell of his chair in the library.

The boy in question looked up from Duke's Homework notes and smiled sheepishly. He held out his hand to help Duke back up.

"Apparently I am your great uncle, but you can call me Danny" He introduced himself.

Duke took the offered hand and noticed the strange scar on it.

"You don't look old enough to be my great uncle" Duke pointed out.

"Well I never planned to be anyone's uncle in the first place. But Bruce's grandparents won't shut up about me being their son" Danny shrugged nonchalant. "Anyways can you teach me, please. I missed so much of my last school year..."

"You want me to teach you?" Duke asked bewildered.

Danny nodded. "There really is no good teacher around and I promised the others that I would stay in the manor"

"Then why did you not come to breakfast?" Duke asked confused.

Danny looked bewildered at him. "Why would you want me there?"

Duke narrowed his eyes at Danny. Danny in turn tilted his head.

"I normally eat at night when you guys are out and asleep. It's pretty funny when the servants yell at one of you guys to take care of yourself though" Danny chuckled.

"Servants?" Duke repeated suspiciously. "Since when do we have other servants?"

"Since a break in from people trying to revolt" Danny shrugged again. "Don't ask me when, I am bad at math"

"And that's why you want me to teach you?" Duke inquired still very suspicious of Danny.

"Yeah, no offense but the others are far too old to know anything about current English or math or science. Don't- don't teach me science. I had enough of that home" Danny pointed out.

"Fine, I can teach you. But first I need to finish my own homework okay?" Duke requested.

Danny grinned happily and nodded. "Sure Duke, knock yourself out. I need to go deal with something anyway"

Duke watched bewildered as cold mist escaped Danny's mouth and he ran off out of the room. What a strange kid.

"Hey Alfred? Have seen where Danny is?" Duke questioned after he was done with his homework.

"Danny? There is no Danny in the manor Master Duke" Alfred informed him.

"But he said he promised the others that he would stay in the Manor" Duke mused worriedly.

"What did this Danny look like?" Alfred inquired curiously.

"Black hair, blue eyes, had a pretty nasty scar on his left hand. I think he was wearing one of Tim's suits, but without the tie. He claimed to be my great uncle, even though he looked like he was 16" Duke explained.

Alfred nodded and made his way to the security room, with Duke in tow. They look at the footage from the Library and low and behold there was Danny. The quality of the footage should have been a whole lot clearer, like the shots were Danny wasn't in the scene.

They followed his path from there. Apparently he ran outside and screamed something while running. They also skimmed through the recording multiple days prior. It was as if Danny just appeared one day in the Manor without any warning whatsoever.

"So I am guessing the others also don't know about him?" Duke pointed out.

"Yes, Master Bruce would have informed me if there was a new child in the Manor" Alfred agreed.

[alien-slushie]

DcxDp Convoluted Crack Prompt/Idea

At 19, Danny is an intern at the Watchtower. Hes no longer a hero himself, but helping the Watchtower helps him fulfill two aspects of himself; being a protector spirit, and his space obsession. Danny is the least nervous about interacting with the Justice League, so Danny is usually tasked with interacting with them if its needed, and has unintentionally wormed his way into a "little brother" role without realizing.

Okay, so technically there is one member of the Justice League he is nervous about interacting with; Martian Manhunter. To Danny, Martian Manhunter "smelled" like space, so he would light up and his core would sing whenever they talked. The same thing happened when Danny rarely interacted with Starfire, and- well almost any alien. The reason he didn't react to any of the supers that way was because they "smelled" more like Eather, enough so that Danny's core didn't registered them.

Unknowingly, though, from an outside point of veiw, it looked like Danny had a crush on the Martian. His face would flush pink, and he'd listen to everything J'onn would say with his full attention, while tripping over himself to do anything J'onn asked of him. To the rest of the Justice League, it would almost be cute- if the age difference wasn't so big, J'onn wasn't one of Danny's bosses, and if they didn't see Danny as their little brother. So now the Justice League is trying to think of how to go about talking Danny down from his crush, and about power imbalances without crossing any line, since, yaknow, they're also his bosses.

J'onn, meanwhile, thinks this whole thing is hilarious. He tries not to read his friends and coworkers minds, really, but when they go pale every time Danny approaches him, he needed to know why. While J'onn doesn't fully know what Danny is, or what a 'core' or 'obsession' was, he did know Danny was harmless. He also knew Danny had absolutely no interest in him like that, thankfully, Danny was just 'fed' by J'onn interacting with him, and he was happy to help since it was harmless. He would, however, watch his colleagues overthink and scramble for solutions that weren't needed. He wouldn't change how he interacted with Danny, he didn't want anyone thinking he was actually 'reciprocating Danny's crush' or something, but he would listen to them freak out. As a treat.

[oonightmareoo]

The bell rang out above him as Tim shuffled over to the counter, already tiredly calculating how he was going to order the most caffeine in a drinkable quantity. There was a short line before him so he had some time.

Letting his eyes wander, he took note of the tasteful decor, and the stunning number of plants for a business unrelated to Ivy, before his eyes inevitably found the people within the building and began sleepily profiling them.

There was a male, Caucasian, in his early twenties, his head in his hands with a laptop opened to a blank document in front of him. College student, likely. A woman, of Asian descent, late twenties to early thirties, her eyes closed as she inhaled the steam coming from her drink. It was a Saturday, so it was likely her day off. The person in front of Tim - male, Caucasian, teen, typing rapidly on his phone with one hand and holding the strap of his backpack in the other - was on his way to a study session, if not setting up here to study with his friends. The person in front of him - male, African descent, late fifties, married, squinting at the board and chewing on his lip - was anxious about how long it’s taken him to decide on something, either having an anxiety disorder or needing to head out quickly. The barista…

Tim blinked. He’d thought he’d slept last night.

The barista was gorgeous. If Tim believed in the fae being in Gotham, he’d suspect this was the Summer King or something. They were definitely a meta, with subtly pointed ears and lightly glowing blue eyes, and small but noticeable fangs that flashed when they spoke.

Tim couldn’t look away now that he’s seen them.

“What can I do ya for?” A Midwestern accent, projected more with this sentence but otherwise light enough to miss.

“At no cost, and repeatedly please,” Tim heard someone mutter, only to watch those pretty eyes widen as a bright flush took over the man’s(?) face.

Even his ears turned red, Tim noted idly. The barista was staring at Tim as though stunned.

Oh, wait, what did he say?

[allie-glace]

DP X DC PROMPT

One day Danny discover after a science class that every D.N.A traces he left (nail, air, saliva, fingerprint, etcetera.) will rapidly degrades into his ecto signature whitout leaving anything human.

Wich some years later is suddenly very useful when he needs to break into museums and private collections to steal Realm's artefacts that were lost and would start to cause problem if not taken back. So Danny doesn't even transform for that and just put a ski mask and a scarf and use some of his powers to steal everything back, he doesn't make any effort to keep his D.N.A to himself.

Wich is very annoying for the police on the case since the video will distord itself sometime and every D.N.A traces will fry any machines it's put in.

It's after a heist in Gotham that the case fall in Comissioner Gordon who throw his hand up and give the case to the Bats.

At first the Bats are all very annoyed when the whole cave fry itself because they thought that the ecto was some sort of fucked up Lazarus Water and didn't take enough precotion when analysing the sample. They then take a personal interest in the case.

[novelistwriter]

The New Farm Owner

DP x DC Prompt

There is a Farm that was run by a couple about an hours drive away from the Kent's place. It is isolated, but the husband and wife are friendly. The couple had also made some of the best tasting vegetables that have hit the market.

A certain butler has also become friends with the couple of that farm as well. And whenever Clark is visiting his parents farm, they tend to visit the couple a few times, and Alfred is usually there on some of those visits.

But when a few more years had passed, the husband had passed on from old age. The wife, Sam, was sad, but they expected her to be more sad.

And a few more years later, she eventually passed away from old age. And when her funeral was over, both Alfred and the Kent's had noticed that someone was still living in the farm and taking care of the crops.

The person living on the farm is a young man, with a daughter. They don't know I'd he was gifted the farm or not.

Danny, finally finished with his Ghost King paperwork, is just happy to be able to unwind in a isolated place with his daughter. Sam had asked him to look after her and her husband's farm while she enjoys the afterlife with her husband before attempting another life with him.

[ziziziziboom]

16-year-old Danny Phantom (member of the Justice League Dark) approaches 25-year-old Red Robin.

Danny: Would you like to go on a date?

Tim: I'm sorry, you flatter me, but I think you're too young for me.

Danny: Sorry for the confusion, it wasn't a date with me, but with my gentleman.

Tim: your knight?

Danny: Yes! Technically, he's an adult, so there wouldn't be any problems!

Tim: Technically? How old is he?

Danny: Um... How old is Halloween?

Tim: ...

Danny: Look, I know it's weird, but he's been alone for a long time, and he really loves the way you psychologically terrorize your criminals and how cool you look doing it!

Tim: um...

Danny: And if you don't like it, you'll have a favor from me, you can ask me for anything.

Tim: Whatever I want?

Danny: Whatever you want.

Tim: Deal.

Danny: Great! Fright Knight will come looking for you tomorrow night! Good luck, bye!

Danny disappears.

Jason, who observed the entire interaction: Tim... Did you really just agree to go on a date with a guy who's over three thousand years old?

Tim: Sure, you heard Danny, the guy hasn't been on a date in a long time. I'll get that favor from the king of infinite kingdoms by the end of the night, you'll see.

After the date with Fright Knight.

Tim enters the Batcave: ...

Jason: How did your date go? How bad was it?

Tim: I have two pieces of news, one good and one bad. Which would you like to hear first?

Jason: The bad new?

Tim: I won't be able to get that favor from Danny.

Jason: And the good new?

Tim: I got a boyfriend