Getting There

Just an internet elder waving their fist at the sky and yelling at children to get off their lawn.

[quackysprouts]

the concept of 12 year old sherry’s teacher calling her dad into the office and it’s a 21 year old who looks 18 and they’re just rapidly trying to do the math

[risonnii]

Resident Evil Requiem got me feeling some type of way. Seeing RPD station made so sad for Leon

[ryuzumisama]

**Thows my favs into the backrooms like little lab rats in an experiment**

[skelesass]

so this destroyed me and had to doodle

[songsomi]

[fizzalys]

Never a father, always a dad

[potatocrisp]

“I just want to feel good about myself. Make amends, or something like that.”

[whiskey-on-velvet]

My unintentional X/Twitter Magnum Opus. Never received so many likes for something in my life! I called it 'The Journey' as I wanted to paint his growth and struggles through his eyes. Eyes always tell a story. My original post is -> here <-

[nicht-vobla]

Hello hi it's not only 10 years of Jay Tim Week but also my first anniversary in the fandom!

I wanted to give back a fraction of joy jaytim fic writers brought me this year and draw for at least some of the fics that stole my heart and inspired me

First up is Tournée du Chat Noir by Meabd for day 1: secret identity

It absolutely sold me on stray/catlad AUs and I've been obsessed ever since!

[piprapie]

Crying, screaming, throwing up, this is so fucking good 😭

[piprapie]

Green Lantern (Hal Jordan): Why is it you hate me so much, Spooky? What’d I ever do to you, hm?

Batman: How did you describe the Green Lantern Force?

GL: … What?

Batman: When we met. How did you describe what a Green Lantern is and does?

GL: Uh… Space cops? Basically?

Batman: There you go.

GL: I don’t follow.

Batman: ACAB.

GL: Excuse me?

Batman: I said what I said.

[imposterogers]

other actors: I sent live rats to my costars and drank sewage water bc I’m a method actor

rpatz: I played sonic everyday —but only the dark version— to really get in the headspace

[ssalmonn]

[scallioncreamcheesebagel]

[piprapie]

I’m so feral about Robert Pattinson. This man is MY Brucie Wayne.

[piprapie]

"It'll just be a few more minutes, Batman is on his way to the Zeta tube; we can start when he arrives," Superman assured the gathered heroes, that ever present confidence oozing from every pore.

"How do you know that? You didn't get any communication that I noticed," Captain Marvel frowned at Superman. He had his own enhanced senses, though they were a far cry from those of the Big Blue Boy Scout—he didn't see Superman check his League communicator, nor did he hear anything from the comms.

"I have his heartbeat memorized, I can track him from that," Superman shrugged, as if that was a perfectly normal thing to A.) Be capable of, and B.) Actually do.

"Gaaaaaaaaaay," Captain Marvel called out, hands cupped around his mouth as he sniggered.

"Captain!" Wonder Woman snapped at him. Marvel jolted to attention.

"What?" He asked, guilelessly.

"We do not tolerate any sort of bigotry or hate speech in these hallowed halls. If you cannot display even a modicum of respect for your fellow heroes you will not be welcome in this group," her proclamation was icy, her eyes hard. Superman's own expression had gone tense and shuttered, and the other assembled League members seemed to be shuffling as far away from their newest recruit as they could without being noticed.

"I... I wasn't though?" Marvel looked confused. "It's a meme." Wonder Woman and Superman shared a look.

"A meme, like a joke," Superman started, but was abruptly cut off.

"Well, kind of, I guess. But I meant it more like an observation," Marvel insisted. "I mean—okay, can you do that trick with anyone on Earth?" Superman paused, momentarily caught of guard.

"With practice, yes, I am capable of memorizing any heartbeat," he confirmed.

"And how many do you know off-hand?" Marvel pressed.

"A handful," Superman answered with no hesitation.

"Alright, and who are they? I'm not asking for names or anything, but like... that reporter you always talk to? Your friends? These guys?" Marvel inclined his head towards the knot of forgotten league members that were observing with slowly mounting horror.

"My family," Superman corrected, this time with some hesitation.

"Oh, well why didn't you just say that! I didn't know you and Bats were related," Marvel brightened considerably, clearly thrilled to uncover this heretofore yet unknown bit of juicy gossip.

"We're not," Superman frowned. Marvel's grin dimmed as he stared at the man that had been his personal hero for as long as he could remember with an expression that clearly showed his mounting dismay and disappointment in him.

"Let me make sure I understand this—you have Batman's heartbeat memorized, a thing that you've only done for a small handful of close family members and no one else, and you think there's a heterosexual explanation for that?" Marvel spoke slowly and clearly, as if he really were just trying to make sense of it all. Superman opened his mouth to speak, but seemed to choke on an intake of breath.

"Regardless, Captain, it is inappropriate to use such derogatory language with your fellow League members," Wonder Woman swiftly cut in, saving Superman from whatever he was about to try and say.

"There's nothing wrong with being gay! I wasn't insulting him at all—besides, all I'm saying is that if I could do that, I'd for sure be checking on my boyfriend like all the time," Marvel shrugged again.

"Boyfriend?" Superman echoed.

"Yes! I'm not a bigot, you guys, Mercury's mercy, I'm bisexual!" He threw his hands up, thoroughly finished with the conversation. "Whatever. Think on it, Big Blue, I'm sure you two will figure it out eventually," he concluded with all the weight of the Wisdom of Solomon. The hall seemed to drip with silence, none of the attending League members daring to break it. That supremely awkward stillness hung in the air for a heart-clenching fifteen seconds before the soft whistling of the door sliding open saved them all.

"Good, you're all here. Are we ready to begin?" Batman strode in, a stack of papers held under one arm as he beelined for the round table.

"Yeah—yes, we are," Superman cleared his throat, nodding at the Bat to get started.

"Gayyyyyyyy," Marvel repeated, softly enough he was sure only Superman would hear. Judging by the way the tips of his ears went vibrantly pink, Marvel believed he might have just stumbled onto something here.

[heist-family-content]

When Nightwing tells Justice League members that Batman makes him laugh, obviously, everyone knows that he's joking, because that's Batman. How the hell does That make anybody laugh?

But then really weird things start to happen. Like suddenly, Batman starts making little quips that toe the line between sarcasm and puns. He begins to humor the stupid ideas that other heroes come up with purely for comedic purposes. He even admits things like "Jesus, I'm getting so old, if I hurt my back much more, spin class is going to be an issue."

And the thing is, Batman only does these things when Nightwing is around, and it literally always earns a laugh from the younger hero. Sometimes they high-five after Nightwing recovers from a fit of giggles. At this point, nobody knows that they're father and son, so this type of behavior is just really freaking people out.

[piprapie]

"B. B! Hey, B. Beeeeeeeeeee. BATMAN!"

"WHAT!?"

"Did you restock before we left the cave?"

"Did I restock—yes, of course I restocked, my god what do you take me for—"

"Ok, well can I have—"

"No, you should have packed your own."

"I didn't expect to need any! We're going into space, why the hell would I need that in space—"

"Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine."

"Don't be such a stingy asshole, you don't even like—"

Faster than any present could see, Batman withdrew something from his utility belt and hurled it directly at Nightwing's face. Nightwing, for his part, caught the item in his mouth and grinned around it.

"Fanks, B!" He mumbled, spitting the parcel out and ripping it open in one smooth motion.

"Are those... smarties?" Barry, brave soul that he was, asked the million dollar question every other League member was too terrified to vocalize.

"Yup! Batman keeps candy in his utility belt for traumatized children," Nightwing explained reasonably, as if that made any sense whatsoever.

"But... we're going on a space mission? Why would he need candy for children on a space mission?" Barry pressed.

"See?" Nightwing motioned to Barry with one hand, his other busy pouring candy into his open mouth. "No children in space! So why would I bring any?" Batman glared at him.

"I don't know, Nightwing, why would you bring candy for traumatized children on a space mission? Perhaps because you always eat my candy for traumatized children? You haven't been a traumatized child in at least a decade," Batman sniped. Hal and Barry glanced nervously at each other.

"A decade? You do not get to age me like that mister, I'll have you know I've been a traumatized child as recently as last week—"

"Losing at Mario Kart isn't trauma, it's a skill issue." Batman smirked. Smirked! The world must be ending.

"Dirty, dirty lies. You're a cheat and you know it," Nightwing insisted, crumpling the now empty packet.

"I feel like I'm missing a lot of context, here," Barry whispered to Hal.

"Don't look at me, I'm not touching this with a ten foot pole," Hal whispered back.

[robs-your-robins]

Do you think that Bruce sometimes pulls the ‘my parents are dead’ card? Yes, I get that it was a traumatic and formative event for him but it would also sort of be funny, especially if he’s doing it ironically.

Some socialite telling him that he can’t bring his kids to events, asking what his mother would have said and Bruce deadpans and goes, ‘I think she would have liked to have met her grandchildren. But of course, she never did’

His med school lecturers threatening to flunk him if he doesn’t hand in his essay on blood loss, only for Bruce to say ‘it’s just a touchy subject for me’ and the lecturer blue screening because shit

Some rogue tries to kidnap Bruce at some event, holding a gun to his head, just for Bruce to look at the rogue, almost tearfully and be like ‘i always knew I would end up like my dad’ and the rogue just panics because now they are in a room with a bunch of pissed off people because they’ve almost made the Princess Diana of Gotham cry.

Clark gets mad at him over something, yelling at him and of course Bruce is just no listening so Clark just snaps, Ma Kent’s favourite phrase of ‘who raised you???’ Only to completely fucking choke, pray for the ground to swallow him up because Bruce’s expression just slips a little (inside he’s hysterically laughing). Clark comes by again with a batch of cookies.

He can't obviously use it on the kids and they can't use it on him.

[piprapie]

"I'm not saying we leave them, Kal, I'm saying that it's strategically a bad call to go in now, in the middle of the enemy's watch rounds. They're professionals, they can wait an hour and a half for an extraction that isn't half-assed," Batman sniped at Superman, to the absolute horror of the junior members in the room. The other founders, being trapped in a pocket dimension, had left Batman and Superman with the B-Team ("They're nice kids, B, don't call them that," "They're green, Kal, and you know it.")

"Leave them? Leave them? Those are our friends, B, not just our colleagues, and we have no Earthly idea what might be happening to them in there, we can't just leave them. Rao above, who raised you?" Superman snapped at Batman, voice bitingly hard.

Batman paused. It felt, suddenly, as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. His normally stoic expression cracked a bit, just at the edges, and the twitch at the corner of his mouth might as well have been a Shakespearean monologue for all it spoke to Superman—he'd fucked up, and he'd fucked up bad.

"I... I'm sorry, B, that was uncalled for. You're right, I'm being hasty. Go over the ingress points again, I missed the bit about the west wall." Batman's flat, white gaze seemed to pierce Superman right through the heart. He knew his friend was made of unusually stong stuff, and has the thickest skin of just about anyone that Superman knew... so these moments, these little private moments of hurt that he inevitably caused for his friend deeply pained him. It felt like kicking a puppy. A large, scary, cryptid-esque puppy.

-----

"Did you have to guilt trip Uncle Clark all the way to hell and back?" Dick scrolled through the cowl footage until he reached Superman's heartbroken expression again.

"Oh come on Dickhead, look at his face! Totally worth it. Still can't believe he falls for that every time," Jason cackled.

"It's because he's in love with him," Tim observed from his perch atop the med-bay countertop.

"He is not—" Bruce stopped himself with a heavy sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose as a struggled to reign himself in.

"Oh he absolutely is," Tim insisted, reaching for another pack of smarties from Bruce's discarded utility belt.

"It would explain how butthurt he gets whenever you pull the I'm Bruce Wayne and my parents are dead card on him," Jason added unhelpfully, motioning for Tim to toss him some candy. Tim flipped him off and threw the packet straight at Jason's head, which he caught deftly. Dick, for his part, was keeping his own counsel (I do not have a favorite child, I do not have a favorite child).

"They might be right, B," Dick shrugged. I do not have a favorite child, Bruce repeated viciously in his head.

"Do you lot think I wouldn't notice something like that? It's a useful tactic to get the big blue boy scout to stop and listen to me, that's all it is and nothing more," Bruce insisted, yanking his utility belt away from Tim's grasping clutches. He'd have to re-stock the candy he kept for child victims soon, his own children couldn't get enough of the chalky sugar disks.

"Whatever you say, B," Tim stared down his nose at him, and Jason didn't even attempt to muffle his laughter.

Bruce Wayne loved his children. He loved his children. The little monsters.

[miseria-fortes-viros]

your weird obsession with moral purity is degrading your critical thinking skills and poisoning your ability to empathize with other people btw

[miseria-fortes-viros]

your weird obsession with moral purity is degrading your critical thinking skills and poisoning your ability to empathize with other people btw

[piprapie]

You know you’re in deep when you have a Court of Owls phone case custom made bc DC has NO COURT MERCH 😤

[piprapie]

The United States v. John Doe (d/b/a “Batman”) and Bruce Thomas Wayne

In Re USA v. John Doe, et. al. Filing 3 with accompanying Order: “The United States of America’s Motion to Disqualify Counsel of Record Harvey Dent (d/b/a “Two Face”) on Grounds of Prior Criminal Acts” (Order Attached)

In Re USA v. John Doe, et. al. Filing 4 Memo from Judge Laurence: “Order Denied. Mr. Dent retains his bar admittance in spite of prior criminal acts. This Honorable Court finds no reason to order the withdrawal of previously-retained Counsel.”

In Re USA v. John Doe, et. al. Filing 6 with accompanying Order: “Defendant’s Motion to Appear Remotely Due to Uncontested Federal Confinement” (Order Attached); Excerpt of Transcript from Motion Hearing:

Mr. Dent: "The prosecution argues that anticipatory retaliation is a genuine concern when witnesses are forced to undergo examination by Counsel held with them in the same secure facility. Defendant’s Counsel would look to The United States v. Abhrams et. al., 185 F.3d 7 (2d Cir.1998) wherein Appellant brought the same argument to the Court of Appeals regarding examination of witnesses in the same room as the accused, who was held within the same prison as the witness; the Court found that perceived intimidation by a party was immaterial to the testimony given, and denied the appeal en banc. Further, it is the Defendant’s opinion that this line of argument betrays the Government’s mistrust in our hallowed system of justice, and besmirches the very ideals of fairness that govern our Courts. If the Government feels so strongly that their own detention facilities are incapable of mitigating—no, eliminating—retaliatory behavior when it is in their exclusive power to do so, then the Defense posits that the problem is not with Mr. Wayne’s choice of Counsel, but with the Government’s inability to maintain control over those that they have remanded to their custody.”