Je Suis une Pizza

I'm Ashley and i drink too much caffeine 

[averagefairy]

being at work while your personal life is falling apart has to be among the top 3 worst human experiences. You’re at your absolute lowest and someone wants to circle back on an email…… unreal

[sergal]

everyone shut da fuck up this is the only thing that matters

[drolta]

the women of Sinners

[varcolaci]

[high-in-hardtown]

mentally I’m still here

[lelianaslefthand]

knee deep in the passenger seat or whatever

[valtsv]

i just know that the ethics classes in magical fantasy realms would be off the rails

[valtsv]

philosophy undergrads when an evil wizard invents another new way to torture people

[catsofyore]

In 1944 a kitten named George (short for General Electric) was saved from drowning by a U.S. Navy crew member. George was then photographed and given a liberty card and detailed health record. Source.

[ethicalhorseslaughter]

[howieduet]

Nationality: pussy

[toritheestallion-deactivated201]

me at Olive Garden at 11:02 am staring down the elderly people impatiently waiting outside knowing we should’ve opened 2 minutes ago but my boss is in the back cheating on his wife with the girl who makes the salads and he has the key to unlock the doors

[mosticonicposts]

certified iconic post

[1-extra]

[ayay]

[id: two men holding the halves of an amethyst geode, smiling. the geode is heart shaped, and both men are smiling. /end id]

[lieutenant-sappho]

babe are you ok you reblogged the two men holding the heart geode again

[wickedwonderlandd]

They found love between a rock and a hard place

[02void]

[homeboygirl]

their names are cpu and graphics card and hard drive and usb port

[kleefkruid]

buisinesses mislabeling their job offers in databases gives so much unintentional comedy, I just searched under "no experience needed" and "no degrees needed" and it gave me a job opening for 'dentist'. Like sure I'll have a go, give me the pliers

[heavenlyhorses]

[supreme-leader-stoat]

[darkieforfun]

[msburgundy-but-worser-deactivat]

whoever said diamonds are a girl's best friend clearly has never met ibuprofen

[luimnigh]

Actually literally accurate. The song originates in the 1949 musical Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, while ibuprofen was invented in 1961.

[tldrgender]

I fucked up so badly on this sudoku page no ones ever gonna wanna have sex with me

[sapropel]

Don't forget to sleep on your neck at a weird angle tonight. I love you

[mysimspc]

[arroz-con-yolo]

INSANE VIBE

[catcrumb]