Why Don't I Hatemarry Myself? @positiveskepticist - Tumblr Blog

someone: hey are u alright

me: *laying facedown on the floor* yeah why do you ask

Homestuck: *updates*

Thousands of people: *simultaneously jump into a pool of grey paint, shouting obscure quotes and singing various songs. They keep coming, filling the pool. Faygo is poured onto heads and children are crying. Something is set on fire and a chorus of "MORE IRONS IN THE FIRE" can be heard. The internet stops working around the world. The stock market is crashing and Tab can't keep up with the demand. Etsy is empty. A crowd is running towards major cities, singing "you can't stop the homestuck" on loop. People are tumbling down stairs at an alarming rates and ICP is hosting 20 ironic concerts at once. Finally, on 4/13/16, there is silence as everybody dies and ascends to heaven. Finally, they are free. Finally. They are free. Free. Free....*

scribblekin

Hey you remember that huge ass log Ash ran with and tossed in that one episode? Well I calculated how much the log weighs, if you're interested.

You have my attention

frostbytemyrik

I decided to start from the scene where the Bagon originally landed on the log.

Okay, was about to land on it. Point is, it’s the same log Ash threw. Now, Bagon is about 2 ft tall, and since he’s directly above the log, I can get an accurate measurement.

(That was as good as I could get on iPhone Photoshop.) Okay, so the log is 6.5 Bagons long. Multiplying that by two, it’s 13 feet. Now, the calculator I was using required diameter on both ends. I’d say the log’s diameter is fairly consistent all the way around, so I only needed to find one end. For that, I used this image.

The Bagon is a bit far away, but I think the log has roughly the diameter of the height of a Bagon. Two feet, which translates to 24 inches.

Now if you have looked at the top, there was only one thing left I needed to input. Doing some further episode watching, I found the trees in the area looked similar to cottonwood trees. (No image available because I was a tired shit from doing all of that math and bad Photoshopping, so I didn’t take a picture. The episode is called Pinch Healing if you are a tree expert and want to see for yourself. Also, keep in mind that I am anything but a tree expert. All I did were a few Google searches.) So I put in that the tree was cottonwood, and here is the result:

Satoshi/Ash Ketchum, a ten year old boy, almost effortlessly picked up, ran with, and tossed a log that weighed an astounding 1,385 pounds (or about 628.23 kilograms)!

scribblekin

1,385 pounds

groovyghost

bukoya-reblogs

The strongest Pokemon we never knew

andisupreme

phuijl

Surely by now, we all know this boy goes to the gym

flighttune

Technically he goes to several gyms

tabbibeard-deactivated20160428

how does he even let team rocket steal his pikachu at this point when he could break their sternums with his index finger

mala-sadas

I REGRET EVERY INSULT I’VE EVER SAID ABOUT ASH IN MY LIFE

strawberryoverlord

Deadpool is not straight

Deadpool is not gay

Deadpool is not bi

Deadpool is Pansexual, remember it.

thatw3irddude

Or he is all of the above

strawberryoverlord

Hes canon Pan. Its been stated that comic deadpool is canon pan and so is he in the movie

Get off my post lmfao

laurdlannister-kingslayer

“or he’s all of the above”

Don’t pan cover all the bases???

draumboosky

Deadpools sexuality goes beyond that though… Pan isnt the right word. Hell fuck anything. He hooks up with aliens and no humanoids and everything in between. He’s married to a shape shifting demon queen who doesn’t have a defined form.

Deadpools sexuality isn’t exactly defineable.

strawberryoverlord

HES FUCKING PAN. THE CREATORS SAID HES PAN. WHY IS EVERYONE IN DENIAL ABOUT THIS. RICK SANCHEZ IS PAN TOO AND HE FUCKS PLENTY OF ALIENS. JESUS CHRIST ON TOAST GUYS

rebellum

People denying pansexuality like “I don’t think he’s pan, I just think he can be attracted to anyone regardless of gender identity, gender expression, and genitals!”