postcards from here

[loriendesse]

Middle-Earth locations (part 1)

[neenarchive]

they can't stop you from thinking about gay sex on company time

[mildmayfoxe]

1) any stretching is better than no stretching

2) any vegetable is better than no vegetable

3) statistically you will never be the worst person at anything, there is always someone in the world who is worse at stuff than you are

[postcards-from-here]

Even if the bar is on the floor, stepping across it is better than sitting there looking at the bar.

"eat a (single/sole/one) vegetable" is a great item to cross off your to-do list.

"drink one glass of liquid"

"rinse some plates"

"open your email. You can close it again."

[postcards-from-here]

So much work bullshit, and I had to get the govt involved.

All because there are some people with power who literally have no idea what it means, what it entails, and what happens when they abuse it and I ran out of fucks to give.

[marinememes]

[crazy-brazilian]

:)

[maple-cloak]

:3 but with two teeth in the middle

[albatross-the-pen-chewer]

what a fella!!

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

*drives my Knife Sharpening Mobile down your dash broadcasting vaguely sinister off-key ice cream truck music*

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

HOLIDAY DISCOUNT TO OUR FIRST 23 CUSTOMERS!

[madnessiseverything]

for @mirellapryce who reminded me that i had this in my drafts

[kuvaton]

[saint-batrick]

environmental storytelling.

[phallicthimble]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the older i get, the more i appreciate the competency and cooperativeness of those politicians who got together to kill caesar 

[rat-bastard-king]

60 agreed to kill him and only 23 followed through with the plan, if I remember correctly.

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

i’m american do you know how siked i would be to get 23 senators to agree on direct action 

[cynassa]

According to Christopher Andrew apparently only one stroke was actually fatal

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

that is exactly as effective as I expect most political action to be tbh

[annebonny42]

I think it’s my duty to tell the world that not only a single stab was fatal, but also a bunch of those senators accidentally stabbed each other (and some of them died because of the wounds) cause they were panicking so much while attacking Caesar

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this is it. this is the taxpayers money in action. incredible.

[khorazir]

“Ghost Whale”

Ink and watercolour Payneland art commissioned by @alltimefail for twistedsyns (Bluesky).

[penandinkprincess]

extremely funny and iconic of shane hollander to have a grand total of one (1) situationship that then became a relationship that then became a marriage

as ever for shane hollander: NOTHING but net

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

you know how in greek myths people who die tragically sometimes get placed among the stars by the gods?

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

call that

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

call that a

[arsonist-arcade]

Its okay, take your time

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

constellation prize

[omarapetirun]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

in my defense they did not specify the order in which i was allowed to take my time!

[sentimental-androids]

Dear God these tags are immaculate….

[caffeinewitchcraft]

You're a villain who just won your first fight against the (very polished) group of heroes that defends your city. You're talking 1 v 6, total smack down. You're so worried about them, you send them a Get Well Soon card and some flowers

In hindsight you should've known what that would look like

[toku-fangirl-2015]

“You sick, sadistic fuck!” the team’s leader seethes at you over the video call. “What the hell is the meaning of this?” You immediately recognize the card they hold up, adorned with balloons and the message “Get Well Soon” in large, round letters.

“I wasn’t aware it was wrong to send my sympathies to a group of teenagers in the hospital,” you reply curtly.

“It is when you put them there!” the leader snarls. “Thanks for letting me kick your asses, girls, hope I can do it again next week?”

Oh. Right. Fuck. “While I may not have considered the implications,” you concede, “I did mean it sincerely.” You honestly hadn’t expected to be able to take out the whole team. “Would an apology card have been better?”

The leader rips the card to shreds. “I thought you had a code! I thought you had standards! I wasn’t expecting you to go all-out against a group of children!”

“I didn’t know!” you shout back. Now it’s the leader’s turn to look vaguely ashamed. “Wait…is that why they’ve been so successful so far? Are you…asking all of the villains to pull their punches, and they lost to me because you forgot to send me the fucking memo?”

A girl darts into frame behind the leader. Her arm is in a sling but the bruises on her face have mostly healed. “Is that what’s been happening?” she asks.

“Of course not!” the leader says with a laugh that sounds forced. “After all, I’ve been training you for years, and—“

“Why are there flowers in the garbage?” the girl interrupts.

“They’re from me!” you answer. The girl turns to watch you on the video monitor. “I…wanted to apologize for how our fight went.” She gapes at you. “I thought you’d be tougher, especially since you’d beaten the others…”

She squares her shoulders. “Thank you for not holding back. The next time we meet, we’ll be ready for you.”

“Looking forward to it,” you tell her sincerely. “Incidentally, how much do you know about the team that came before you?”

“Before us?” she repeats. “We’re the first hero team in a hundred years!”

“Is that what you’ve been told?” you ask, eyebrows raising. “Listen, if you and your teammates ever want training from someone who’s going to be honest with you—“

“Enough!” The leader shuts off the call.

[caffeinewitchcraft]

This is amazing!!! The idea of the hero mentor orchestrating/managing fights has such chilling implications. Besides the villains not wanting to beat on teenagers, were there other reasons they cooperated? Why/how does the mentor have a memo system? I'm so intrigued!

[wizard-council-bureaucrat]

Everybody STOP having a crisis, it’s now tea time

☕️☕️☕️🫖🍵🍵🍪

Pause all dread an catastrophe to have a cuppa and some cookies for the next 15-30 minutes

This is a wizard spell

[thekidsfromyestergay]

This was on a post about how it's ignorant and privileged to wear headphones in public and I fear its already become a part of my vocabulary. Must everything harbor a moral failure.

[teaboot]

I’m not Christian, I don’t go to church anymore, and my pastor died, but when he was alive I’d sometimes go to his sermons and I remember one time he said “it feels good to hate, but we know that it isn’t allowed, so when we’re told that we’re allowed to hate someone we get so excited that we forget we’re supposed to love”, and if my humble atheist ass might borrow some church talk I’d like to perhaps submit that

[teaboot]

Anyhow sometimes on the day to day I feel disgust or revulsion and I have to ask myself “is this a danger to anyone at all or am I just looking for something I’m allowed to hate” and a solid 98/100 times it’s the latter so once again thank you pastor D

[postcards-from-here]

Solid technique.

Side note: when I meet someone and just Take Agin them, it is quite distressing because I cannot be dissuaded from my Agin Taking, even when I talk very sternly to myself (I'm usually, depressingly, eventually proved right *but that is not helpful in the moment or moments when my subconscious is yelling at me*).

So I know the difference between a (seemingly) irrational full-on aversion that is almost debilitating; and just indulging oneself enjoying a solid sesh of loathing people and things.

And the latter is a very seductive and slippery slope (oooer, Vicar) because once you do it once, the neurones are all "oh do we want to go down this pathway again? No worries" and then next thing you know, it's a fun thing to return to quite easily, again and again. Especially if there is no danger to anyone, no fallout. And peeps, in the past months I have seen where that silo of thought leads, and so this little tumblr moment has been very very useful in capturing why this is a really bad idea.

I am not going to suggest we should all have our analogue bags and baskets ready; but I got into a lot less mental trouble when I had a bucketload of hand-stitching to do. So.

[teaboot]

I’m not Christian, I don’t go to church anymore, and my pastor died, but when he was alive I’d sometimes go to his sermons and I remember one time he said “it feels good to hate, but we know that it isn’t allowed, so when we’re told that we’re allowed to hate someone we get so excited that we forget we’re supposed to love”, and if my humble atheist ass might borrow some church talk I’d like to perhaps submit that

[teaboot]

Anyhow sometimes on the day to day I feel disgust or revulsion and I have to ask myself “is this a danger to anyone at all or am I just looking for something I’m allowed to hate” and a solid 98/100 times it’s the latter so once again thank you pastor D