Don’t Bother Me This Is My Chill App Damn It

[suspici0us-stew]

[witchdisk]

please god it would be so funny

[tryingtobecoollikeyou]

UNETHICAL????????????

[bunjywunjy]

so they said that it turns out that if you centrifuge ricotta cheese at something like 20,000 RPM for a few minutes, you end up with a solid substance that's delicious but so rich that it feels like it solidifies your arteries instantly. they were working on incorporating it into pastry fillings

[aropride]

erm, actually, a boundary is something you set for YOURSELF, not other people. so actually it’s NOT “breaking your boundaries” for me to chase you with this axe

[writing-prompt-s]

"Your son will take your throne from you," they prophesized, spitting each word out of teeth clenched tight with hatred. Why they'd bother prophesizing such an event befuddles you; your son is literally your chosen heir, after all.

[loveyourllamas]

Years later, you realize what the prophets meant. For most of your life your son was your pride and joy; an academic, who would surely lead the kingdom into greater health and wellness. Until he committed the ultimate act of betrayal.

"You will not take my throne from me!" You cling to your grand chair so hard your knuckles turn white.

Your son sighs. "Dad. Dad it's lead-"

"Of course it's lead! It's a strong metal, signifying the strength of our country- this throne has been passed down the royal line for 300 years, 15 rulers before me-"

"That is not enough time for that many people!" Your son throws his hands up in the air. "Because it is lead! It is poisoning you! Didn't you wonder why grandpa died at 40?"

"Ah, pfoo! That's the ancestral curse."

"It's the throne! The throne is the ancestral curse!!!"

[ruinedchildhood]

[phantomrose17]

[silly-jellyghoty]

[lenacraft]

March

[abstractandedgyname]

[animentality]

[sourloverboi]

[theadhdgoblin]

[euclyptodis]

My new year resolution is to have 36 - 48 hours per day

[trashdogpenultimate]

RULE NO. 1 OF WOUND CARE: ignore itttt :33

[centers-for-disease-control]

DO NOT

[diseases-for-center-control]

RULE NO. 2 OF WOUND CARE: go swimming!! in a pond or especially a public pool :)

[centers-for-disease-control]

WHO TF ARE YOU?!?!?!

[rott1ingbonep1le]

This is how my posts look

[clownkiss3r]

learning a lot toda✍️y

[phantomrose96]

That thing where milkmaids were often immunized against small pox because they'd already contracted the weaker cow pox earlier in their lives. That's Tumblr, to me, against whatever the hell social media landscape is happening in 2026.

[phantomrose96]

"TikTok Instagram Youtube-Shorts Share-Your-Whole-Life Influencer Social-Media Online Online Online" it cannot affect me. I was already a weird online 16-year-old all so many years ago. You cannot grab me raw and unfortified with these poisons. I inoculated myself when glomping was a thing. I am still on Tumblr making text poasts.

[memecucker]

[fatfemmefreaquency]

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

the average runway model should be fat because the point of fashion runways is to show off the clothing, and fat people wear larger sizes, which makes it easier for the audience to see and appreciate the designs. follow me for more blindingly obvious facts of life

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

this isn't a shitpost bc I'm dead serious. though actually there shouldn't be an “average” model size there should be multiple body types to show the designer knows what they're DOING. if your "haute couture" only works on stick figures then you aren't designing fashion you are playing with dolls.

if u can't design flattering fits for multiple body types then maybe just go work for Mattel? barbie always needs new outfits

[redstonedust]

i think being proud of where you come from is one of those things that becomes fun the more specific you get. like "proud to be english" bad rancid vibes. makes you sound like the kind of person who rants about immigrants. "proud to be from yorkshire" better vibes. i cannot deny the yorkshire cultural heritage. "proud to be from pocklington" absolutely fucking hilarious please never let anybody kill your pocklington pride.

[redstonedust]

i love the USA: weird vibes. dont trust that.

i love muskegon michigan: you are experiencing a kind of personal joy that i can and will not take from you

[desolationlesbian]

Making a new rule for straight creators along the lines of "don't kill off your lesbian couple it's homophobic" but this time it's "if you're going to put a lesbian in your show you can't make her a cop"