take a fucking sip

WA. Take it sleazy. Moved to @lonelycowboysnearyou

[whitepeopletwitter]

[occidentaltourist]

Same energy

[twinking]

[ampervadasz]

[tell-the-stars-hello]

this was cute until i realized the fish is probably trying to not get eaten

[killhitleragain]

A fish trying not to get eaten wouldn’t slow down when the “predator” slows down. It also wouldn’t constantly swim in a circle near the edge of the tank; It’d try hiding. Also a fish in a tank in a a public place that is constantly filled with people is not likely to see people as predators.

[darkwingsnark]

Animals, I think people tend to forget, also enjoy playing.

[bogleech]

Small reef fish like this evolved for an ecosystem where hundreds, even thousands of different animal species live in extremely close quarters 24/7 and the majority of them are bright and colorful, rather than living camouflaged and hidden like life in a forest or desert. To survive in such an environment it is a necessity that they have extremely adaptable brains capable of categorizing what’s dangerous, what’s useful and what’s of no concern. I can guarantee it does not consider humans predators, and knows humans are the things that bring food! With a mind that sharp and inquisitive it is probably copying what it sees just in case that’s an important thing to do…or it really is just getting satisfaction from the activity.

[zootycoon-archive]

want a shirt that says YOU SHOULD FEEL VISCERALLY VIOLATED BY THE UNSTOPPABLE CORPORATE ENCROACHMENTS ON YOUR ATTENTION SPAN, BY THE FACT THAT YOU STARTLE LIKE A TRAINED ANIMAL AT EVERY NOTIFICATION, BOTH OVERSTIMULATED AND BORED, LETHARGIC AND JUMPY, WAITING FOR THE NEXT BIT OF VALIDATION WITH THE SAME SICKLY EXCITEMENT AND FEAR AS A GAMBLER AT THE TABLE

[naomimoon]

[fiightingdreamers]

da share z0ne told this guy to shut the fuck up once and its been 11 months and he’s still melting down about it lol

[sascoalition]

Obama will never be half the man nor love America as much as Reagan did.

[trashskeleton-deactivated201408]

Obama will never eat as many flags throughout his presidency like Reagan did. Reagan holds the current flag-eating record at 3,463 flags during his presidency. Obama is currently only at 1,072. Here we see pictured: Reagan in action during one of his flag feedings. This is speculated to be approximately his 560th flag consumed.

[d3monicas]

xuxi

[dongcroncher]

Himbo rights activist

[dunmeshi]

just stumbled across Francisco Soria Aedo's work and first off: really good painter, super talented. He mainly did portraits and neoclassical but I really like are his expressions, which do show up in his neoclassical work. lots of people smiling and having fun and it's just very cute

this is one of my favorites

[dunmeshi]

heres a couple more examples!

[marvel-leviathan]

...i dont thing I’ve ever seen this style with people smiling...

[invadcrs]

so who...

who tryna be friends

🥺

👉🏼👈🏼

[paninimaker]

Im sorry but when people do the 👉👈 thing it makes me die bc in american sign language putting your fingers together like that means gay sex

Im sorry

[vennitrii]

AKDKdkgksckfkJWKFKGKG

[lyingfigure]

yeah who tryna be friends 👉👈

[unclefather]

[switchbladesounds-deactivated20]

Jay Pharaoh’s John Mulaney impression

[butchmachine]

Holy shit

[thetaxidermy-ofyouandme]

That wasn’t an impression John Mulaney possessed him

[goblincore-aesthetic]

Mona Lisa and her possum.

[laughconfetti]

This isn't real. You can't just put fake stuff on the internet. I am so upset, because I want this to be real so bad

[pretentiouslimericks]

It can be real if you believe and/or help me break into the louvre

[veinitas]

me when i see a cat: CAT! cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat cat

[lurknomoar-deactivated20151109]

Fun fact: when I see cute animals, I forget English and automatically revert to my native Hungarian. I don’t know what bystanders make of me, reciting guttural gibberish to rabbits.

[quizzicalqueek]

But the real question is, what are you SAYING to the rabbits? Is it ‘RABBIT! rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit bunny bunny bunny awww cute bunnyyyyy’?

[lurknomoar-deactivated20151109]

Well, I usually say the Hungarian equivalent of ‘bun bun bun lil bun look at your tiny spoon-shaped ears awww bun brave little lawnmower bun’, but sometimes I say ‘hey rabbits, my sister’s gonna go to med school’ because I think everyone should know.

[littlegaywitch]

I live in Japan, and I always revert to English to talk to small animals, and I was cooing at this tiny little fluff machine of a puppy in baby english like “hello you’re so cute such a cute hello hello yess you’re good” and the 70 year old Japanese lady that was walking him started to *translate the baby talk english into Japanese* for her pup. She wanted to be sure he understood it too.

[sindri42]

https://xkcd.com/231/

[wind-voice]

ACCURATE.

[eileenthedeafdog]

I was at a pet store with Eileen. A woman walked up to us and asked if she could pet her. Eileen’s collar has ‘Deaf Dog’ embroidered on it. The lady asked about it, I confirmed, yes, she’s deaf. The lady immediately switched to American Sign Language and asked her how was her day, was she being a good girl, she’s so pretty. Eileen is wagging her tail excitedly, knowing that someone is talking to her.

[autistic-goblin666]

THIS IS SO WHOLESOME

[what-even-is-thiss]

My grandma lived in Switzerland for a few months one time helping take care of her other grandkids and she said the hardest thing about the language barrier was not being able to baby talk to cats or dogs so she had my aunt teach her how to call kitty kitty kitty in Swiss German so she could communicate with the neighborhood cats.

[meangirlnurse]

my cat Meatball’s hanukkah sweater started kinda coming off, so my girlfriend went to fix it, and as she did so she said to him, in her most tender and maternal voice, “aww, is your shirt coming off? whore”

[dragon-in-a-fez]

the first five words of this post alone contain so much storytelling

[catscafecomics]

A big thank you to all the folks in the delivery service who help keep our world moving everyday.

[fuckyeahasexual]

[yorksilk]

I hate family vloggers so much imagine having this little respect for your adolescent kid’s privacy and personal life

[yorksilk]

Do You Know What Children Are

[inunah]

They don’t have jobs, nor do they pay for rent, utilities, or food. That’s the textbook definition of a freeloader.

[yorksilk]

no it’s the textbook definition of “children”

[sinnomine-deactivated20220221]

"why isn't this 3 year old paying rent? fucking freeloader i dont know why i keep you around"

[sleepyblackgirl]

and ppl wonder why child abuse red flags go ignored smh

[hotvampireadjacent]