I literally heard myself wheeze at one point reading these. 😂
I wasn’t feeling well at work once and the boss told me to go get something to eat. I did feel better and a little while later when he saw me and asked if I was feeling better I thought that the food in my gut had helped I meant to say food in my belly but told him “I feel a lot better with something in my butt”. Not sure we ever spoke again.
I am a 5'2" woman with a not-particularly-deep voice, but I once started daydreaming in an office setting and got to humming a VERY old commercial jingle for dog food, at the end of which I scared the crap out of my co-workers by booming "MIGHTEH DAWG" in my best pretending-to-be-a-cowboy voice. Things got quiet and stayed that way for some time. Defense contractors are kinda skittish.
I can hear you!
Was working on a routine job with another fella, me doing one aspect and he the other. He was almost done his part of it, so I go to ask him “want me to snug these bolts in?” Wires in my brain get crossed, I look him dead in the eyes and say “you wanna suck me?”
Cue an uncomfortable pause, he realizes what I meant to say, I realize what I just said, we both nearly died laughing. He’s one of my closest friends to this day.
