PurbleSnuffles

Purble! 23 | he/him | media gobbler and complete goof-lord

[konoko]

[lumsel]

There's an open pit in the middle of our office plan that drops down into a bunch of very sharp spikes that kill you instantly. This is bad. People keep falling in there and dying. Someone put a sign up, the other day, all bright yellow so you can't miss it, that says "Beware!!! Spikes!!!"

The office immediately split into two factions over it. One says that if anyone falls in the spike pit it's their own fault for being so stupid and not watching where they're walking, so we should remove the sign. The other says that the sign is an insult, there shouldn't be a spike pit in our office at all, and having the sign up like that is just normalising the existence of the spike pit, so we should remove the sign.

We ended up removing the sign. Probably for the better. Still... for a while there it looked like it might have worked...

[unusual-pybro]

[m1dori-eyes]

Nobody has ever been capable of writing a scathingly harsh and well formulated satire about the perils of modern capitalism, that doesn't just get immediately one-upped by some random food service worker talking about their actual week.

[love-me-like-a-reptile]

[puzzledshipping]

this picture 😭😭 I can’t really explain what I find funny about this

[mammalianmammals]

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

Shout out to the phrase “I’m going to become the joker” for capturing a very specific and real emotion

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[necrofuturism]

when the head scribe tells you to add a blemmy to the bestiary

[foone]

this is you 🫵

[vinci-the-dragon]

The Dragon starts every day with a good stretch!

[teaboot]

Do you think Clark Kent's first few major articles were about the continued presence of lead pipes in parts of Metropolis' water system

[teaboot]

(Average Metropolis reader after investigative reporter C. Kent's 452nd article on yet another case of landlords/business owners/factories' continued use of lead pipes/paint/gas/glass knowingly exposing the public to dangerously toxic lead levels) what the fuck happened to this guy

[teaboot]

One day Bruce Wayne mentions in an interview that heroes like Superman are overrated, as the most effective way to reduce crime is to provide public resources and improve local infrastructure, then cites how neighboring city Metropolis has effectively lowered their violent crime by 13% after addressing their outdated water system and investing low income housing. the reporter conducting the interview suddenly starts looking a little uncomfortable

[teaboot]

To be clear, Clark is still a fantastic investigative reporter. He still has to track down the sources to prove all this shit

[teaboot]

"Who, Clark Kent? Yeah, we're pretty sure he's a Meta. Is he a superhero? Like what, "Lead-detector guy"? "Captain pipes?" Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy and it's a handy trick, but it's lead detection, not laser vision. He's not about to go running around in tights any time soon."

[sindri42]

I just love the idea of a cape maintaining their secret identity by pretending to be a completely different and less impressive kind of parahuman.

[roach-works]

everyone assumes that kent is so squirrely around superheros because he’s just desperately hoping not to be conscripted to the JLA to fix their plumbing

[teaboot]

Local Metropolis Reporter Publically Recognized For Contributions To The City; Awarded Medal Of Distinction

[championofdnd]

They tried to get superman to present the medal but he was offended at being called "overrated" in comparison to Clark so he declined

[teaboot]

Counter offer: Bruce Wayne disguised as Superman

[teaboot]

beating this dead horse with memes

[bimmyjimmy]

Imagine just having this guy hanging around

[foone]

I dreamed I visited a videogames store run by one of my former managers, and found a unique peripheral for the PS1: the biometrics controller

it was a jacket you wore and it would push buttons based on your heart rate and blood pressure. I tried to play Metal Gear Solid with it, without much luck

[kordova-deactivated20230908]

[wreegis]

there was an incident at work today

[pokemonarchive]

Goomy (2026) - TCG Pocket Playmat Illustrator: Mizuki

[foone]

39 years ago today, the debut single of a young singer was released, a song that would one day change the world forever. Let's celebrate together!

[cazfax]

my dad gets on the computer for 5 minutes and he already manages to unlock internet explorer’s unholy twin and pull it out of the depths of hell you know what fuck this shit