Just hangin' out there

Alex | 23 | any/all |🇵🇱| Nothing significant whatsoever| art -> @oakpath

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

starting a compilation

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[no-sharks-on-the-sun]

[beanytuesday]

Animal Crackers for Zoologists

[daisywords]

the plot chickens (becomes scared of its own premise)

[patronsaintofweepingmothers]

2009

[doyoulovethewayzeylily]

[dragongirlsnout]

2000-2002 Saturn SL1

[miss-wizard]

its shorts actualy

[galaxywarp]

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

[protectspock]

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

excuse me

[protectspock]

Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way

[gothicprep]

why is your cat green?

She’s built different 😌

[gothicprep]

Look i tried to laugh it off, but I haven’t stopped thinking about this message because… my cat literally isn’t green

like where is the green

[gothicprep]

Oh Christ

[sapropel]

This is the color your cat is

[lazygravez]

colors i eyedropped directly from op's cat

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

I drew a tree using only colours eyedropped from OP's cat.

[karakats]

every time i see this post all i see is some green alien kitty with antennae so i had to draw it

[bogleech]

I originally thought those were supposed to be mushrooms, implying that this cat is moldy

[tanuki-pyon]

Moldy forest cat

[gothicprep]

i'm happy y'all made fan art of my cat. i tried to show her and she just rubbed her face on my phone

[wifegideonnav]

gonna be honest i don’t know how many more ‘enter the 6 digit code we sent to your phone’s i got left in me

[whitepeopletwitter]

[kalesrebellion]

So funny story actually. One of my friends was hooking up with this girl, they were friends with benefits. She needed a date for some work party so he agreed to go with her. Turns out her dad owns like 3 dental practices and she worked as the business manager for one of them.

Anyway my friend had some not so nice teeth and during dinner the father of his fwb was like “you work where you work, you sleep with him and his teeth look like that? Get him an appointment.”and then bounced. So his fwb made him an appointment at the practice she managed and my friend ended up needing like 3k worth of dental work and his friend with benefits just gave it to him for free.

So that is the story of how my friend not only got sex, but dental out of the friends with benefits deal.

[helloitsbees]

[hotvampireadjacent]

[nohoperadio]

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

[hjartasalt]

Iceland is fucking bizarre my name change made the news

[hjartasalt]

Like just @ me at this point I'm literally the only person in iceland (and very possibly the world) who has the first name Lauf

(Article title reads "Lauf and Birningur in group of new names in the name register")

[hjartasalt]

No one lives here so now two of our biggest news outlets are vagueing about me lmao

[hjartasalt]

Hmm you're right. Correction: two of our biggest media outlets are talking about me specifically because they are obsessed with me

[hjartasalt]

This morning I showed up to work and my boss was like "congratulations :))" and I was kinda confused so asked her on what and she said "your name, I heard about it on the radio"

So far I have counted two online articles and apparently the radio is also talking about my name change so I'll keep you guys updated when I'm on national tv or something

[cipheramnesia]

With a little legwork we can make more people on Tumblr see this than the entire population of Iceland.

[dogpuppy]

[nineteenyearoldmeblog]

im fucking crying

[anti-parent]

teamwork makes the dream work. and dreamwork. makes shrek

[anti-parent]

fantastic. i love it. i posted this after my wife said it yesterday and as i was doing it i was like "this can't be an original thought. as soon as i hit post someone's going to say 'you stole this from a tweet from 2014' and i'll say 'no, i stole it from my beautiful wife.'"

[throo]

Wh-what do you mean it’s from a birthday cake

[throo]

We could have been eating him

[eraserheadadult]

when i was a kid i had moments of being so fucking diabolical because i realized at some point the best way to leverage power over my family was to do shit that would make everybody late

[eraserheadadult]

our house was in the middle of nowhere surrounded by woods so when i decided i didnt want to wear dresses anymore if we were going to some event & my parents insisted i had to wear a dress i would just go hide in the woods. was so committed i almost made us miss a flight once bc my mom packed a dress in my suitcase

i only promised to stop doing this if my parents got me formal boys clothes to wear which eventually they did. i don't feel bad about resorting to violence bc i asked politely and they said no. proud of 10 yr old me for evil annoying lesbian behavior

[the-prophesied-disco-gay]

5th grade was the last time I wore a dress for school pictures. When my parents attempted to force the issue for 6th grade, I climbed onto our roof and pulled the ladder up after me. My dad borrowed the neighbors ladder. As soon as it touched the roof I pulled it up too. By the time I had 3 ladders they were willing to negotiate, and 2 hours late for work.

[max1461]

[ostensible-adult]

[Image ID: a tumblr tag reading "problems that can be avoided if you simply treat your child as a human being with the right to make decisions on what they wear". End ID]

[maja-paja]