Roxie

peer-reviewed shitposting

[whitepeopletwitter]

[callmedaddy-42]

[artissijamm]

HERE’S THE DUCKS.

[furbyhater]

you missed the best part 

[weaver-z]

How the media depicts the Apollo 11 mission:

Actual quotes from the Apollo 11 mission:

[georgieharrisons]

also according to michael collins when the three of them were discussing what neil armstrong should say when he first stepped on the moon, collins suggested armstrong say “Oh, my God, what is that thing?”  and then scream and cut out his mic.

[wickedwitch-of-the-left]

all you’ve done is convince me that michael collins was one of the funniest men alive tbh

[imploder]

Michael Collins deserves so much for being forgotten

[charaznable]

stop! comparing! free condoms! to free tampons! condoms are free because of the aids crisis! they are important!

[charaznable]

listen this post blew up w/ really shitty commentary on it so lemme give this to u: i have always supported free tampon programs, alright? but it’s possible to support them without shitting on the legacy of aids activists and saying “um why are condoms free when sex is OPTIONAL” because guess what! it makes you sound like a fucking homophobe. stop saying this shit

[egberts]

im CACKLING

[jewish-tutter]

someone explain the jewish holidays to me like i'm 5 years old

[rizaoftheowls]

Purim: They tried to kill us, we survived. Let’s tell the story, wear silly costumes, and get wasted. (Optional: have a carnival or a play!)

Passover: They enslaved us, God freed us. Remember this via a big ceremony/feast and then don’t eat bread for a week. This is a big one; you’re going to have to clean your house and host all your relatives.

Tu B'Shevat: It’s Earth Day, let’s eat some fruit.

Simchas Torah: We read the entire Torah every year, and we got to the end! Let’s have a dance party and then start all over again!

Tisha B'Av: They destroyed our temples. That sucked.

Rosh HaShanah: Happy New Year! It’s time to ask (and grant) forgiveness for the wrongs done in the past year, pledge to do better, and wish for a sweet new year. And go to synagogue for HOURS.

Yom Kippur: Rosh HaShanah’s somber counterpart. God decides on this day your fate for the next year. Repent your sins, hope for forgiveness, and fast. (And go to synagogue for HOURS.)

Yom HaShoah: Holocaust Remembrance Day.

Sukkot: Harvest festival! Sleep in a hut under the stars.

Shemini Atzeret: Man, I don’t even know?

Shavuot: God gave us the Torah! That was pretty nice of him.

Chanukah: They busted up our temple and tried to forcibly convert us. We responded with guerilla warfare. Let’s eat some fried food. Candles!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

So basically the entire Jewish holiday calendar is giving the middle finger to death and high-fiving, with or without various combinations of prayer and foods.

[rizaoftheowls]

Yup. Or as we say, “They tried to kill us, we survived, let’s eat.”

[galaxy-of-great-possibilities]

thank you for the desc’s bcs they are beautiful and i am now educated

[above-d-clouds]

A handy table for everyone:

[cityglowing]

Y’all have no idea how happy it makes me to see my goyim followers reblogging this. Really. It means the world to me.

[pi4nobl4ck]

[delcisco]

NO WAY

[irritatedkiwi-deactivated202512]

Honestly how the fuck

[tyleroakley]

this did not disappoint

[visual-infinity]

[that-one-fat-guy-over-there]

how dare you do that to baby 

[towerofglass]

[ironpour]

[spookyfbi]

This is like one of those art house horror movies with symbolism I don’t understand except I understand what this is trying to convey perfectly holy crap

[maeofthedead]

Same energy 

[whitepeopletwitter]

[thewellofastarael]

Fun fact: the reason wearing seatbelts became common in the US was because kids were trained to in school, and would constantly bug their parents to wear their own seatbelts. In my mom’s words, everyone was shamed by little children into behaving safely.

[psychotictea]

This is how I got my mom to quit smoking,,, by annoying the everloving shit oughta her at age 7

[seigephoenix]

My 8 year old looked at a man in the airport (when I had to fly her to her Dad’s for the summer) and the sass came out in 3 ways.

First: She would constantly ask why someone wasn’t wearing a mask, loudly. “It’s not like it’s hard.”

Second: Standing in line to get food she noticed ome guy behind us wasn’t adhering to the 6 feet guidelines. She turned to him. “Six feet please.” He was so surprised he stepped back automatically. But then glared at me as I shrugged. “Rules are rules dude. She did say please.”

Third: A woman sneezed on the other side of the terminal waiting area. She was joined by a couple other kids for this one. “If you cough or sneeze, use your elbow please.” Honestly half of us were trembling to keep in the laughter and the others were just shocked to hear kids speak up like that.

[captain-snark]

hearing a five year old yell across the yard that the neighbors were having a party and “its illegal!” is hysterical. 

[nz45south]

I present to you a drama, comedy, horror. This story killed me three times.

[blogging-at-your-funeral]

[lessdanthree]

what drugs were they on when they made this

[jedavu]

Auto Mechanics Pose Dramatically to Recreate Renaissance Paintings

Photographer Freddy Fabris has paid homage to the great Renaissance master painters using his camera instead of a brush. This unique tribute—aptly called The Renaissance Series—fuses contemporary culture with the dramatic styling of the original portraits.

[sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2]

Visit Original Link

Sorry about what I did to Mr. Sandman before, does this make up for it?

[whatshell]

[screaminghansolo]

its out of touch thursday

[gremlins-2-the-new-batch]

cant sleep because im thinking about this tiktok

[someemochick]

[whitepeopletwitter]