Affinity for Artifacts

31, He/They. I blog about Magic: the Gathering, Terry Pratchett, and pretty much anything else I find entertaining. I build Commander decks as a hobby, and happily take requests.

[thehummingbirdsmatter]

I love when a meme gets so many steps away from its source material that it would be completely incomprehensible if I didn't know what today's date was

[centaurself]

in celebration of april 13, i present all four known photos of neil, who banged out the tunes 19 years ago today

source: theagilerat.com (click right to see all four photos!)

[starberry-cupcake]

[cosmikazie]

NEVER KILL YOURSELF

[violetganache42]

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY.

(Sources: Wall Street Journal and Hollywood Reporter)

[beardedmrbean]

[spacefinch]

Come get your gold stars

[confetti-cat]

[hellenhighwater]

Gonna get myself a fun little surprise I guess

[hellenhighwater]

This is better than I'd ever hoped for, I bet a rat could kill you with that thing by firing a laser back in time and electrocuting your grandfather

Just look at this thing

[hellenhighwater]

The rat gun is hereeeeee!

[hellenhighwater]

This is getting notes again so I will admit that "rat gun" was an autocorrect error and it was supposed to be "ray gun."

But it'll always be a rat gun to me.

[hellenhighwater]

The most expensive thing in these pictures was the cat, and he was $60.

[hellenhighwater]

I'll be honest--I forgot that the pump organ desk/bar was visible in the background, and it was NOT under $60.

It was actually $75.

The chairs, however, were paid for in human life. I inherited them; they were originally my great grandmother's. But they're not particularly rare-- you can find these exact chairs without a lot of effort, in reasonable shape, for not that much money. They made a lot of them.

[theworsethingsgettheharderifight]

your gazelle has a pearl choker

[hellenhighwater]

That's Hadrian. He's a bush buck and he loves fashion.

[hellenhighwater]

Hi you asked this question and I immediately went to the pottery studio to make a calcifer to put in my woodstove.

Will update if he survives the kiln.

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

i am still on tenterhooks vis a vis calcifer 🥺🥺🥺

[hellenhighwater]

I just brought him home from the pottery studio and wired him for light. He lives!!!!!

[thebisexualwreckoning]

OP just wondering do you like have the closet to Narnia tucked in there somewhere?

[hellenhighwater]

Dude, c'mon, these things take time.

Give me a couple hours.

[hellenhighwater]

Okay!! We have doordrobe! It's not quite done but after nearly turning myself into an hellpancake while carrying this in from the garage to the house, I feel like I should call it a night.

Right now it's not going into a secret room (but the Angel of Death (And WiFi) behind it does have a secret compartment for my router? Does that count) but Malice and Vice are still exploring it like it's a whole new world.

The House of Horrors continues to be...well, exactly what it is.

[hellenhighwater]

Oh, no, all radioactive materials go in The Box.

[copp3rtop]

please explain. Do you actually have a lead lined box for radioactive objects, or are you just talking about the router behind the painting?

[hellenhighwater]

The Box.

[hellenhighwater]

Not people's teeth, no.

[chaoticgremlinmakingart]

Holy shit. This just keeps getting better and better. Absolutely marvelous house. What other treasures do you have in that house?

[hellenhighwater]

I recently got some very silly dishes and a telescope!

[hellenhighwater]

All of these accusations of witchcraft! As if the vibe in this house could be any more clearly Artificer.

[ardentmystacina]

#every time op posts a picture of her house I get heart eyes

[gleerant]

if you ever find yourself thinking “wow I scraped the bottom of the barrel with my energy with that and came out okay!” that’s the devil talking. you did not come out okay. you borrowed energy from the future. you will repay it if you don’t rest and replenish the borrowed energy first.

[gleerant]

this one took off quickly - are you guys ok

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

WIZARD PSA: Chronomancy might be weird and confusing, but one of the few solid rules of the discipline is keep your promises. Time is a library, and you don't want to meet the librarian.

[sensiblereblogifposts]

Reblog if you have met the librarian

[archdemoning]

[merinnan]

[vindalf]

Detritus: I think dem rioters about done. Dem's all calling for a cab.

Littlebottom: They're chanting "ACAB", Detritus. It means "All Coppers Are Bastards"

Detritus: Heh. Well, they ain't wrong. I know I am, and Mister Vines would say he is.

Littlebottom: What about Carrot?

(thinking at Troll Speed)

Detritus: Well, ok. But then again... Nobby is bastard enough for two coppers.

Very precise Ahnk-Morporkian rioters: ACAOTAOBE!*

*All Coppers Average Out To Approximately One Bastard Each

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

OH SHIT THIS ONE JUST GOT REQUESTED LAST WEEK

[spoopdeedoop]

petition to bring back saying "huzzah!" when something goes your way and "alas." when it doesn't

[spoopdeedoop]

in hindsight, pitching something that would be deemed a fair bit strange by some standards to a site teeming with already incredibly strange people was a mistake. apologies tumblr users i’d forgotten where i was

[lionfloss]

NON SIGN II is a billboard created in 2010 by Lead Pencil Studio and is located near the Canada-US border in Washington. It consists of thousands of stainless steel rods.

[ominous-signs]

Official ominous lack

[flavinbagel]

Missouri replace every single last billboard along Intestate 70 with these challenge

[peoplegettingreallymadatcards]

[juliette-tango]

Happy Neil Banging Out The Tunes day to those who celebrate.

I found him an audience while I was hunting my collection for the best bricks.

Please enjoy and reblog this little Lego build.

If anyone wants a parts list, I will deconstruct and take progress photos .

Bang out those tunes forever little rat. I think it's 18 years today.

[hikolu]

Mini Cross Stitched Magic the Gathering Card

[cephalopod-celabrator]

I think one of Pratchett's great skills in writing was being able to make silly things serious, in different ways. Like, there's a fairy godmother forcing everyone into fairystales, how fun! Except in the process, she has stopped seeing them as people. She's forcing people to live lives they don't want to because she decides that's how it has to be. Sometimes she goes so far as to violate her victim's minds and deform and puppet their bodies so they'll play their part right, and anyone who doesn't do their job gets mercilessly killed. And there's a zombie activist named Reg Shoe who buries himself every year out of solidarity for the dead, how funny! Except he is filled with a genuine passion for justice and improvement in the world, and that's why he literally refuses to die. And he buries himself on a holiday that happens to be the anniversery of his own death, and he does it next to the bodies of the friends and strangers he fought alongside, the ones who didn't get to come back, so he spends one day with them. There is still a lot of silliness in discworld, a lot that's wacky and funny, but a lot of it, when you think about it, is oddly beautiful or touching or disturbing or something else entirely.

[discworld-heritage-posts]

Discworld Heritage Post

[emergency-broadcast-system]

raidcore

[emergency-broadcast-system]

[garbage-empress]

Once on IMDB I saw a “goof” which was that during a scene set in India(?), the light flicker was at the wrong frequency (in hertz). I wish I knew what movie it was to show you guys, I want to say it was some Marvel shit.

I always wondered how this person knew that. Was there an amazing Indian electrician who just instinctively felt the flicker rate was off? Did they go frame by frame and count the flickers per second?

[boy-and-girl-crazy123456]

I wanna say that was Tenet?

[hazelsmazecave]

It was The Bourne Supremacy @garbage-empress​

[garbage-empress]

holy fuck

[neko-mancy]

[mountainsboyhowdy]

*punching propane tank in a video game*

“no way! I fill these for a living.”

[chaotic-archaeologist]

I will always be in love with highly specialized incredibly niche knowledge. Humans are beautiful

[dduane]

Ten years ago now, he left us.

I miss him.

[hellchilde]

seanan mcguire writing Feed in 2010: there was a presidential election, and a perfectly normal and reasonable human was running against the personification of evil

me in 2010: i dunno that seems like a caricature, surely that would never happen

me in 2024: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[seananmcguire]

I am the holder of the dodgeball.

[kedreeva]

before anything else goes according to plan

[seananmcguire]

Nope. At this point, I have endured four years of the shittiest possible adaptation of my work; I am not putting the dodgeball down until I get my zombies.

[saunteringvaguelydownwards]

Wait, is Feed the book you were researching when you kept calling the CDC to ask "if I did [x] would it make zombies?", and they kept saying 'no' until eventually you got the "...please don't do that" response?

[seananmcguire]

Yup.