Random incorrect quotes

A blog for random incorrect quotes. Will be mostly kpop but there will be some other fandoms I like mixed in.

[random-incorrect-things]

Jisung: Today I found out you can get scented toilet paper.

Jisung: Wanna know how I found out?

Changbin: No, not really.

Jisung: Well, I was wiping my ass-

[random-incorrect-things]

Wooyoung: Thus concludes mv presentation about how Uptown Funk would definitely have been included in the Shrek soundtrack, had it existed at the time.

Hongjoong: We were supposed to be having a meeting about our comeback.

[random-incorrect-things]

Jeongin: Have I ever told you that I love you with my whole heart?

Chan: No, I am not taking you to McDonalds. It’s 2am.

Jeongin: Mean.

[random-incorrect-things]

Dipper, meeting Bill for the first time: Though I admit I don’t know much about you, I am feeling pretty confident in my assessment that you are probably some sort of sick deadly fuck.

Bill: Who told you my secret?

[random-incorrect-things]

Hiccup: Do you value your friendships? You should.

Astrid: I value my friendships.

Astrid: You - six dollars.

Astrid: Fishlegs - four dollars.

Astrid: Tuffnut - negative seven dollars.

Astrid: Ruffnut - one dollar.

Astrid: Snotlout - three dollars.

Ruffnut: That's all I'm worth? I think our friends are priceless.

Astrid: And I think they are worth ten dollars collectively.

[random-incorrect-things]

Jisung: *laughs* Babe, you had a crush on me? That's embarrassing.

Minho: We're married.

[random-incorrect-things]

Chan: Have you ever been in shared proximity with an idiot for so long that you can feel their dumbness rotting your brain?

Hongjoong: I am a member of Ateez, yes.

[random-incorrect-things]

Jimin: What are you eating?

Yoongi: You wouldn't like it, it's really salty.

Jimin: I like you, don't I?

[random-incorrect-things]

Jeongin: I just saw Chan knitting, is he secretly eighty?

Chan: That sounds like someone who doesn't want a creeper hat or a Werther's caramel candy.

[random-incorrect-things]

Dipper: So, what do we get after all of this?

Wendy: After what?

Dipper: Life.

Wendy, sarcastically: A participation trophy.

[random-incorrect-things]

Mingi: Cut my life into cheeses. This is my last charcuterie board.

Wooyoung: Fermentation... no peeling don't give a fuck if I eat it all in one sitting.

[random-incorrect-things]

*At a bank teller window*

Jisung, in a bad Italian accent: I'd like-a to make-a da deposit!

Bank teller: HEY BUDDY, WAIT, I REMEMBER YOU!

Jisung: *Frantically pours marinara sauce into the vacuum tube*

Bank teller: GODDAMMIT, IT'S HIM AGAIN!

[random-incorrect-things]

Hiccup: And what did we learn, Tuff?

Tuffnut: Tackling someone isn’t the correct response to being asked a simple question.

[random-incorrect-things]

Beomgyu: Go to hell!

Yeonjun: Where do you think I come from?

[random-incorrect-things]

Chan: Did you just refer to a knife as a “people-opener”?

Minho: Should I not have?

[random-incorrect-things]

San: And I’d love to be sorry for that, but we all know I’ve done much, much worse.

[random-incorrect-things]

Hoseok: You ever get so tired that you start seeing spiders?

Jungkook: Me after I take 17 Benadryl and start seeing the hat man.

Hoseok: THE WHO?

Jungkook: Oh is this not a safe space suddenly?