occasionally subtle
Stranger Things
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Love Begins
wallacepolsom
Today's Document
Acquired Stardust
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
noise dept.
shark vs the universe
titsay
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ellievsbear
Sade Olutola
Sweet Seals For You, Always
RMH
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Misplaced Lens Cap
sheepfilms
dirt enthusiast
seen from Lithuania
seen from Australia
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
@rangersan
i wish all working class brits a very riot when your government tries to spend a billion dollars on that bitch’s funeral while your cost of living skyrockets, and i wish all non brits a very support working class brits while their country catches on fire
Sometime you just gotta take a little break from collecting souls!
[Based on this video!]
______________
Vax from Critical Role
KEN ROBINSON ‘Full-body education’ (Ballet Boy part 1)
Ok seriously this person it putting out important stuff.
i can’t deal with this
more vm group memes from the modern high school au
vax’s ongoing quest to get kicked out of a hot topic
percival [say the titles of your three favorite Fall Out Boy songs as fast as you can] de Rolo
“hand me the FUCKING scalpel Keyleth”
every cashier at every corner store in town knows vex, and is terrified of her
“Grog says: Get rekt”
Pike standing on a chair when she gets mad at someone else in the group so she can be at eye level with them
hiding all the chairs when Pike gets pissed off
“IF YOU DON’T WATCH YOUR TONE, VAX IS GONNA START CRYING”
Vax, audibly crying: “shut the fuck up”
Grog’s attempts to memorize the quadratic equation always ending up being indistinguishable from the macarena
Percy the Fake ID Guy
the One Hundred Percent Serious Theory that Trinket is secretly an assassin sent from the future to murder Scanlan, specifically
When Vex Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy
Pike has never had a SINGLE alcohol. Not one. Ever. In her life.
That time Keyleth got detention for sneezing
Scanlan’s age is a cryptid
“I’m eighteen.” “Allegedly.”
I love new Soft Goth Firbolg.
As a fairly non-religious jew I don’t think I ever appreciated how badass the story of passover was until I considered how it would look to your average egyptian dude living through it
Imagine growing up all your life being waited on by a race of slaves who despite living in squalor cling to the belief that they were the chosen of this omnipotent elder god. You laugh this up, pray to Horus and then go about your day
Then one day, a slave with a robe and staff barges into the palace claiming to be the hand of an elder god and demands liberation. You grab the popcorn and try to get a front row seat while the two highest level clerics in the entire kingdom demolish the guy, then watch in shock as he summons a giant cobra and kills them both in one go.
Then, Over the next 10 days you watch this warlock proceed to flood your rivers with blood, summon hordes of wild vermin, drop a pestilence on your people and livestock.
All the while your king goes off and says “we don’t negotiate with terrorists”
Its at this point that the hand of a dark and ancient god has had enough, and with a wave of his scepter like a conductors baton, he calls down the fucking reckoning. As meteors stream from the sky, the warlock yells out his incantation. It’s not an ancient tongue, or poem of dread. Just four simple words: “let my people go”. With one more breath he raises his staff, and with the screaming of a million angels he puts out the sun
At this point I should point out that with each plague this sorcerer has turned the domain of one of your gods against you, starting with Sobek: god of the Nile and working his way up until it appears he has struck down Horus: the god of gods.
Your gods are dead, and the only one still alive is your pharaoh: the representative of the gods on earth
Now, with extreme prejudice, this sorcerer summons a fucking angel of death, and one by one it slaughters the heir of every family until your own king, a firstborn himself pleads for mercy and gives in.
As the freed slaves retreat, your king grins and unleashes a sneak attack, pinning the sorcerer and his people between an army and the sea. Finally this sorcerer, who the whispers say was a fallen prince, raises his staff in mock surrender, and when he brings it down the fucking ocean shatters. Leaving a jagged crack for his people to escape
God fucking damn that’s hardcore
hyperempathy things
• *sees inanimate object* hi!!!! how are you??? i am your friend!
• Instant Tears whenever someone raises their voice
• “you’re overreacting” *crying* “NO I’M NOT!!!!”
• you can never give away old stuff because that is Mean and everything is important
• everything is your friend. trees are your friend, birds are your friend, lightbulbs are your friend.
• when u just kind of Absorb emotions
(add on if you’d like!!!)
When you put something down and it wiggles a little,so u say “stay”
interrogation scene in a movey where the guy refuses to cooperate and he’s like “fuck you” and spits blood and the people interrogating him are like “what the fuck. nobody’s even hit you yet. where did you get all that blood from”
i think that’d be funny
“Dude are you ok”
i will never be over the fact that during first contact a human offered their hand to a vulcan and the vulcan was just like “wow humans are fucking wild” and took it
Humanity’s first contact with Vulcans was some guy going “I’m down to fuck.”
Vulcans’ first contact with Humans was an emphatic “Sure.”
@sineala
#iiiiiiiiiiiiii mean vulcans had been watching humans for a long time#they knew the significance of a handshake but still#they had to find some fast and loose ambassador#willing to fuckin make out with a human for the sake of not offending them on first contact#lmao#star trek give me the story of this fast and loose vulcan
“sir…these…these humans…they greet each other by…” *glances around before furtively whispering* “by clasping hands…”
*prolonged silence* “oh my…”
“sir…sir how will we make first contact with them? surely we…we cannot refuse this handclasping ritual, they will take it as an insult, but what vulcan would agree to such a distasteful and uncomfortable ritual??”
*several pensive moments later* “contact the vulcan high command and tell them to send us kuvak. i once saw that crazy son of a bitch arm wrestle a klingon, he’ll put his hands on anything”
Elsewhere, w/ kuvak: “….my day has come.”
The vulcan who made first contact with humans is named Solkar guys. Y’all just be makin’ up names for characters that already have names.
Bonus: here’s a screencap of Solkar doing the “my body is ready” pose right before he shakes Zefram Cochrane’s hand:
I swear Vulcans only come in two types and they are “distant xenophobes” or “horny on main for humanity”. Also apparently this guy is Spock’s great-grandfather and frankly that explains everything.
Hey so I looked into this at one point and that handshake literally created a lifelong telepathic bond between the two of them, and basically all of Solkar’s descendants were later obsessed with humans, including freaking SPOCK, so I’m not saying that handshake was so gay and good that it created an intergenerational telepathic bond between Solkar’s descendants and humans, but I’m also not….not….saying that.
actual footage of first contact makeouts
The slow deliberation with which Solkar takes Cockrane’s–I’m sorry, Cochrane’s–hand… The sheer sensuality witch which Solkar infuses an otherwise borderline impersonal social ritual… It clearly shows a very conscious knowledge, on Solkar’s part, of what the significance of the handshake is in Vulcan terms and of how affected he is by it.
That’s why he’s so slow in doing it, and so sensual. A part of Solkar can’t believe this is happening, despite it being a perfectly logical thing to expect from a human, and the rest of him can’t believe how good it is.
I bet that if the camera zoomed in any further we would see the dilation of Solkar’s pupils and a quickly-repressed shiver of delight. Cochrane’s firm, businesslike clasp is probably (in sexual terms) being perceived as a deliciously carnal display of dominance.
No wonder Solkar is all like, “TAKE ME, YOU WILD-MANNERED BARBARIAN WITH ENTICINGLY ROUGH CALLUSES.”
And so we find out that yes, there is such a thing as bottoming in Pon-farr.
Every time this post comes round my dash, it just gets better.
jester! 🌈🌈🌈
almost done!
Critical Role spoilers without context
I love them all
Please do not use my art without my permission! Ask first!
an authority figure: [expresses slight, arguable disappointment in me]
me, shaking: Wow. Can’t Believe I’m The Worst Person Alive
authority figure: *is in a bad mood or even is just less friendly than usual*
me, stomach in knots: My fault? I must be the cause of this?
yet somehow also me:
Fuck You
Authority figure: *Exists*
Me:
Fuck You
concept: all normal checkouts are replaced with self-checkouts but instead of losing their jobs the cashiers now get to sit on top of lifeguard chairs and periodically throw wine glasses at me like dracula while i buy my goods
I went to MCM Manchester on Saturday as an alright Jester this weekend and loved it!
