Where Wit Goes to Die

Ellie |19 | I have baby hands | Send me some "dank memes" and "dick jokes"

[filmeditors-deactivated20230605]

[hxyleykyioko]

Happy Pride!!

[raviposting]

Jake Peralta is Bisexual: Canon Evidence

“Dammit Diane, what are you doing after this?” // ”Dammit, what are you doing after this Gerald?” 

Then saying “I’m gonna die alone” by the end of the episode when I don’t recall anything regarding Sophia or Amy in that ep. 

Pimento: “White guy, svelte, thick brown hair, piercing blue eyes…I don’t know I guess you could consider him classically handsome? Is that weird to say?” Jake: “No. I mean - is it? No - I don’t think so.” 

“Not gonna lie, that turns me on a little bit” - to Holt after Holt was threatening/competitive /// “God you’re being so mean. Do it more.” - To Amy, after she was being rude/competitive (side note Jake also has a mean kink lmao) 

Thinking the annoying ass close partners were “awful, for sure…all tall and beautiful”. 

Honestly he’s out here appreciating men’s looks constantly and he does it way more than Terry or Charles do. 

Literally any time he looks at guys. 

Talks about the perp being hot and when Amy said “I’d like to bring him to justice” responded with “We all would” 

Being wayyyy too into his “Rosa coming out as bi” speech that he had just on the ready. 

Does puns, finger guns, and wears leather jackets on a regular basis.

This Iconic Look™: 

tl;dr Jake Peralta is bisexual and doesn’t actively know it yet and if he’s straight so am I and that’s unrealistic lmao so b99 chop chop make it happen k thanks love you guys byeeeee

[barren-and-trivial-words]

#B99 is just a bunch of Chaotic Bisexuals being wrangled by a Lawful Gay

[deathgripspussy]

We need a disney princess who’s a top!!!!!!

[s3xmage]

Mulan

[deathgripspussy]

you know what you’re absolutely right, post cancelled

[adh-deku]

[bogleech]

how has it been ten years since the Simpsons movie and I still can’t expunge “spider pig, spider pig, does whatever a spider pig does” from my brain

Who thought it was funny enough to be in EVERY trailer, commercial, web and radio advertisement

Where do they live

What’s their greatest fear and most vulnerable physical spot

[cheaphalloweencostume]

god im not even a simpsons fan, only saw the movie a single time because it happened to be on in the same room I was in, and this also has happened to me anyway

[sengawolf]

I haven’t even SEEN the movie and this happened to me anyway

[astrangeenchantedboy]

i knew that scene before i had a firm grasp on what spider-man was, so even now when i hear the theme music, my brain auto-fills in with “spider-pig, spider-pig, does whatever a spider-pig does”

[holdingontoyoufordearlife]

I will never not love this montage with every fiber of my being.

[murielswedding]

who told greta to pose like she’s holding a single grain of sand

[buzzfeed]

Dick's Sporting Goods, A Top Gun Seller, Will Stop Selling Assault-Style Rifles

The company said it would also not sell guns to anyone under 21 years of age, regardless of local laws.

[greenteacology]

I don’t come out to people I just make gay jokes until they catch on

[nick-avallone]

my kink is seeing money go into my bank account

[d0nn0]

[tami-taylors-hair]

These Florida kids are not fucking around. 

[legendofbisexuals-old-deactivat]

quick, someone who’s never seen scooby-doo 2: monsters unleashed explain what’s happening

[nyctosaurid]

not possible everyone’s seen scooby-doo 2: monsters unleashed

[boyfriendmachine]

not to be fake deep but mamma mia.. here i go again.. my my.. how can i resist ya….. mamma mia, does it show again.. my my, just how much ive missed ya.. yes, ive been brokenhearted………… blue since the day we parted.. why why did I ever let u go……. mamma mia.. now I really know.. my my, i could never let u go…………..

[sleepymarmot]

small brain: Tahani doesn’t belong in the Good Place because her motivations were selfish

bigger brain: Tahani’s motivations were not that bad and were a result of toxic family relationship, and the good she did by raising enormous amounts of money outweighs that anyway

giant brain: Tahani’s charity indeed made a large positive impact, but that was only possible because of how rich her family was, so she does not deserve to be put above people who did not have the same resources. her obliviousness and elitism are further evidence of that. the problem is not her motivations but her privilege

galactic brain: the system that arbitrarily sorts people into a small number of saints who get paradise forever and a large number of sinners who must suffer forever is a cosmic version of the same system of privilege and, if truly exists, is the real evil. the criteria for sorting are just a distraction. criticizing the criteria presented to us by the canon and trying to think of better ones is pointless at best and serves to justify that system at worst

[amidalleia]

#infinity brain: she made every woman she met gay and didn’t deliver

[jewisheleven]

sometimes a family isn’t a man and a woman. sometimes a family is two bros chilling in a hot tub five feet apart cause they’re not gay.

[bettyjugheads]

From now on, I’m gonna be super chill.