I am Alex. Enjoy.

Woah I haven't updated this description since I first got a tumblr. Awkward. I've added a nifty new search bar, so you can look for things specifically! Maybe now I'll actually start using tags. Maybe. My selfies are tagged, of course. Those are #me. Other than that, enjoy a good laugh on my blog. Or laugh at me complaining about my trivial life. That sounds good, too. PLEASE LOVE ME.

[feluka]

cat laziness is so contagious. you'll see your cat flopped on its back in your bed a completely comfy cozy baby and you'll be like. you're right. you make a compelling argument.

[afeelgoodblog]

Surprise triplets 😂

[sandersstudies]

I can’t decide what’s funnier, if this was a genuine candid photo of the father’s shock, or if he was an excellent sport and was like “hey folks, know what would be hilarious…”

[lizluvscupcakes]

“Yknow, Ted, the guys at the bar are gonna wanna know what it was.”

“Bring the photo! It’ll be funnier if you bring the photo.”

[gay-ellis-thats-all]

Story Time!

My father, who is an identical twin, has two older sisters who were also identical twins. My grandfather’s favourite way to tell the story was that in 1956 when he was awaiting the arrival of 🤷‍♀️ Child™️, the doctor (who, in the small town where we’re from, had delivered my aunts a few years earlier) came to the lounge, lit a cigarette and took a seat next to him.

“Clifford… how are ya?” the doctor greeted.

“I’m alright… yourself?”

“Good, good…good, so how many ya want this time?”

My grandfather, even in the retelling of the story heaved the most world weary sigh and said, “…how many ya got?”

[catboymettaton]

[ID: an image captioned “Photograph from 1946, when there was no ultrasound and everything was a surprise!” it shows three women each holding one baby up to a window, and on the other side a man has fainted backwards into a second man who is holding him up. end ID]

[maximum-overboner]

i’ve lost two days of my life to this picture

every time i look at it i just start fucking howling like a shot wolf

[brxnd--nxw]

me, finally getting a chance to say something I’ve thought about for twelve days straight: oh, hey, that reminds me, funny thing, this just came to mind but

[felipenfernando]

me whenever i’m forced to confront someone

[bimbinis]

you know a joke that never EVER gets old is when a character says smth like “I will NOT go to [place] and that is FINAL” and then it cuts to them in that place I eat that shit up every single time

[bimbinis]

Equally good variant: when the character says smth like “what’s the worse that could happen?” and it cuts to a scene where it’s so much worse than what they imagined

[pembrokewkorgi]

I couldn’t stop laughing, this is so wrong.

[arosu-sama]

WHAT

I MUST WATCH THIS

[intellectys]

Here’s some weapons for your essay writing arsenal!

Hemingway Editor Calmly Writer  The Most Dangerous Writing App Purdue O.W.L. One Look Thesaurus JSTOR Google Scholar

Reply with your favourite or other great websites I didn’t include!

[fuckyeahcomicsbaby]

IT Workers Share the Most Idiotic Things Non-Techies Have Told Them

[kodiak-attack-deactivated202103]

i remember one dude that came in last week that tried to convince me that his optical drive was his hard drive

[meadow-soprano]

I’m crying

[happy2bsmiling]

[somanyofthekids]

I just needed to make sure more people saw this.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I want those fucking shoes man

[transheadcrab]

why do they always show cranberries in thos big pits n its implied its wet and possibly swimmable. do cranberries really grow like that. wh

[khamingbird-blog]

You’ve never heard of The Bog?

[transheadcrab]

th

the what

[transheadcrab]

EACH ADDITION TO THIS POST MAKES MY BLOOD RUN COLD

[punkrorschach]

This is a cranberry bog (unflooded) it’s how cranberries grow. Once they’re ripe, the blog is flooded and the cranberries harvested.

Basically by using big floaty things to round them all up and then scooping them out of the water.

[transheadcrab]

thank u. i hate it a little less but the horrible little man in my head is still screaming “BOG BODY BOG BODY BOG BODY”, but i appreciate the education,

[mkinnon]

i mean, there’s typecasting

and then there’s playing a version of cinderella’s stepsister four times

four

separate

productions

[waitinghopingliving]

Here’s a bit of an explanation:

[theforestofthorns]

God I love her.

[marisatomay]

for sale: baby shoes never worn. kid was born bigger than anticipated. absolutely jacked. real renaissance man.

[jelly-sugarcube]

PSA TO WEAR A MASK IF YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA

[zenosanalytic]

Here’s the LA Times Article this graphic’s taken from.

[signlesstheredbloodedtroll]

And it’s not “works best with a shaved face” it will not work as intended at all if you have facial hair. The hair breaks the seal on the mask, allowing smoke and toxins in. Shave to save your life.

[geekandmisandry]

“Millennials are killing the-”

[sailorbrazil]

i made an “evil sim” or at least the closest i could do to it, shez materialistic, self-absorbed, gregarious and self-assured. all she does is train her skills and fuck

[sailorbrazil]

her house looks like shit and shes broke as hell but ive seen at least 1 person faint over her two-star celebrity ass

[sailorbrazil]

probably bought that robe on aliexpress

[iamoutofideas]

her house looks like a taco bell

[sailorbrazil]

it is

[comrade-bastard-deactivated2024]