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[moretimeplease-next]

[introvertia]

[mikkeneko]

#every winter for the last couple years there's been a few winter storm advisories and they're like#DO. NOT. TRAVEL. TO. TAHOE. DO. NOT. DO IT.#and ppl do it. and every year I'm like wow if only there was a notorious story in american history abt#ppl traveling through the northern california sierras during severe winter storms............... - warnings by imwritesometimes

[brucebocchi]

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

Tactical reloading of things that don’t need tactical reloads

[taraljc]

I lost it at the toaster and couldn't make it past the smoke detector before reblogging

[h0ped3lusion]

This is so satisfying to watch—

[tomorrowillbeyou]

maths enjoyers and bug enjoyers and horror movie enjoyers and so forth all need to come together and unite against the common enemy of people telling you how much they hate something as soon as you mention you like it

[tomorrowillbeyou]

literally can't believe i have to say this but i actually don't? want to hear about how much you hate maths in the tags? people are missing the point of the post it isn't about which of these things you like and don't like and which should be added or removed it's about having the basic decency to not constantly tell people you hate their interests when nobody asked. which you're failing to do right now.

[feralbiologist]

[abalidoth]

EVERY FUCKING TIME.

[phoenix-theurge]

Read Lockhart's Lament you fucking math-hating cowards. It's free and a 20-minute read.

[renastarsong]

Please understand that when I tell you I hated math in school, I am trying and probably failing at expressing profound awe at your ability not only to comprehend and use those tricksy numbers, but to do it at scale and for absolute wizardry and it actually works. You are doing things so far beyond my ability to process. I can't do long division. Not just in my head. At all. I have work arounds I can do on paper if I don't have a calculator but I straight up cannot do long division properly. So all y'all who are Actual Math People are straight up witches and I say that as the highest possible compliment. I hated math in school and you are just over there doing magic. It's wild.

[tokidokifish]

so i just saw this and i’m not sure how i feel about it

if you’re asexual, how do you feel about a fic with no sex specifically being tagged “ace friendly”

i like it

i am ambivalent about it

i don’t like it

my feelings are nuanced

i’m not asexual/see results

Voting ended onSep 30, 2024

feel free to explain - if you can? i’m still a little 🤔 abt it personally - in the tags

[renastarsong]

"Ace friendly" on a lot of fics, especially ones that don't have SOME kind of sex component to them, have a nasty habit of just slapping it on there as a way of going 'look, this fic has no sex in it, don't be scared, aces!', as if there aren't oodles of other ways to filter for that ALREADY. So most of the time it comes of as condescending virtue signalling, which. Bleh. Feels like a kindergarten teacher is telling me no one will hide behind a bookshelf and jump out at me.

You do, however, get people who actually are using it to mean 'this fic is going to yell about asexuals and being accepting, god damn it' ie it is literally being friendly, and those are much better. You can usually tell the difference because this kind will have just 'asexuality' tagged as well, often also 'asexual character'. These I like. (These are also less likely to USE that tag tho so... ^^;)

There's probably also a portion of people who are like. In the 'confused but have the spirit' category and have just not quite figured out the norms yet. Who I am slapping into the first category by default and giving the -_- stare.

[blurds]

this is the funniest thing I’ve seen in weeks

[aheeheemwhimper]

[kawaoneechan]

[syekick-powers]

english's pronunciation rules are absolute bullshit poopoo made up crap but one of my favorite side effects of this in written english specifically is like. altering the spelling of a word in such a way that it's technically pronounced the same. but reads very differently when your eyes go over it in written form. and that sort of dissonance between the proper spelling and the altered spelling producing the same basic sounds in your brain creates an unprecedented level of comedy.

[syekick-powers]

ingredience. creacher. both of these are pronounced essentially exactly the same but the altered spellings are just hilarious for some stupid reason. the english language is a disaster but at least whatever is wrong with it is REALLY funny.

[mikkeneko]

[crunchymayo]

[kermittingacrime]

[gallusrostromegalus]

I was raised agnostic and tend to remain ambiguous on theological matters.

-but my house has a porch on the second story that affords me a terrific view of my neighborhood and the Colorado Front Range and I was partaking of some peace before the 4th Of July Finger-Loss Festivities begin, and I have had a

~*Spiritual Experience*~

I just watched my neighbor try to unload an actual wooden pallet that had to have been forklifted into the back of his insecurity pickup worth of fireworks.

Except that he does not have a forklift in his garage.

He does have so much sports memorabilia and cardboard boxes of unsold MLM Merchandise and patriotically themed camping gear and posters of women in bikinis and flags of suspect political organizations in his garage that there is only BARELY enough space for the fireworks and certainly none for his truck.

So he had to unload the individual boxes of recreational explosives from the back of his truck and stack them in the minimal space he had cleared by hand. This is a tedious and time-consuming process as this neighbor has purchased a wide variety of recreational and locally illegal explosives instead of many of just a few types, so the individual boxes are rather small.

He begins, and this is crucial to what happens next, by cutting apart the industrial-grade saran wrap his explosives dealer had so carefully wrapped his merchandise in, and discarded it unsecured on his lawn.

Where Outdoor Conditions sometimes happen.

His process for unloading the fireworks is to 1. Climb up through the gate into the bed of his pickup truck (a feat made unusually difficult due to the slope of his driveway, and this man's fascinating decision to wear the world's Siffest and least Flexible Denim Overalls. 2. Once in the pickup bed, he selects ONE (1) box from the pile He is apparently from a niche religious institution that doesn't believe in stacking things. 3. Carries it awkwardly around the palette that barely fits in the truck bed 4. His wife yells "Be careful!" when he nearly falls out of the pickup. 5. He Yells "SHADDUP!" back at her. 6. The Large German Shepherd barks from inside the house. 7. He yells "SHADDUP!" back at her too. 8. He sets the (1) box down on the gate 9. Slowly and awkwardly climbs out of the pickup bed 10. picks the box back up, and carries it into the garage.

Question: Aren't you going to help this poor man? Answer: Absolutely Not.

There's four military veterans, MANY dogs, and several people with dementia in this neighborhood, all of whom are terrified by this chicanery every year and many neighbors have repeatedly asked him to maybe do the fireworks somewhere else. (This is the Eighth Year Running he's held a major demolition event in his driveway, and for those of you who can do math, you may be able to guess the precipitating incident to this little ritual) Additionally, I live in Colorado, a state marginally less prone to spontaneous and catastrophic conflagrations than a rotting grain silo, but only marginally. Our recreational explosives laws are written accordingly.

I am in fact calling the Non Emergency line to report Fireworks violations, and reading off the brand labels to someone named Dorothy, who is gleefully totaling up a SPECTACULAR fine for my oblivious neighbor.

However, while I'm on the phone with Dorothy, I notice the wind begin to pick up. and by "Notice" I mean "The Industrial Saran Wrap he left on his Lawn earlier is suddenly swept up about 100 feet into the air by an updraft intense enough to make my ears pop" And by "Pick Up" I mean "I look up to see the sky has turned a fun and exciting shade of glass green, and the bottoms of the clouds are bumpy and rounded, and the overall effect is not unlike looking up through the bottom of the cup at God's Matcha Boba Tea."

For those of you who do not live in places with Inclement Weather, these conditions mean "You have about 30 seconds before a Major Meteorological Event Occurs."

I move under the eaves. "Hang on Dorothy." I say, nose filling with Petrichor. "The show is about to be cancelled." "Oh, that doesn't matter!" Dorothy cheerfully informs me. "It's illegal for him just to possess those, no matter if he actually gets to set them off or not." "Terrific, because he's gotten maybe five boxes out of a hundred inside."

Sometimes, the weather gods are Merciful and give you a verbal warning, typically in the kind of thunderclap that makes your ears ring.

The Gods were not merciful today.

It's not often that I am in the time, place, correct angle or in a properly observational frame of mind to see this, But I got to see it today. Huh. I thought. I've never seen a cloud just DIVE for the ground before. Oh. I realized as it got closer. That's RAIN.

Sometimes, a thunderstorm will form in such a way that the rain that would normally be distributed over an area of say, five to tent square miles, is instead concentrated into an area of say, my neighborhood exactly.

So today, I was granted the rare privilege of being able to actually see the literal wall of water descend from On High and DIRECTLY onto my porch, my street, and my neighbor's truck, and his pile of unwrapped fireworks.

The sheer impact force of the downpour immediately scatters the teetering pile of fireworks boxes in the back of the truck, like the wrath of God striking down the tower of Babel. Boxes tumble, then are washed out of the bed of the truck by the deluge. Smaller Boxes are carried down the road in a little line by the stream forming in the gutter, like little impotent explosive ducklings.

My neighbor was definitely yelling something, but I could not hear what over the DEAFENING noise several million gallons of water makes upon high-speed contact with the earth's surface, but there was a lot of arm-waving and faces turning red as he went looking for the saran wrap that had probably blown to Nebraska by now, while his wife started disassembling the complex three-dimensional puzzle of interlocking material goods in search of a tarp. They do not have a tarp. They have one of those wretched Thin Blue Line flags though, and my neighbor jogs out in a futile effort to cover what's left in the truck.

Which is when the hail begins.

"HELLO?" Yelled Dorothy. "HI!" I shouted. "WE'RE HAVING SOME WEATHER!" "OH GOOD!" she shouts back. "WE NEED THE MOISTURE!"

I watch for a minute longer, but the loss was immediate and catastrophic- the hail is the size of marbles and dense and cares not for your pitiful cardboard and cellophane, ripping the boxes asunder and punching holes in the few things covered in plastic. The colors on the Thin Blue Line Flag are seeping all over the remains of that it was supposed to protect in a particularly apt visual metaphor. Not even the few boxes that made it into the garage are spared, as the German Shepherd escapes from indoors, and in an attempt to assist her humans, jumps directly into the small stack of not-yet-ruined boxes, scattering them into the driveway and deluge. She even picks one up so her humans will chase her around the yard, before dropping it in the gutter to be swept away.

So. I was raised Agnostic -but even I can recognize when God slaps someone upside the head and shouts "NO!" at them.

---

(If you laughed, please consider supporting my Ko-fi or preordering my book of Strange Stories on Patreon)

[gallusrostromegalus]

It's that time of year again and I think we should all enjoy this, as well as familiarize yourself with your local fireworks laws, the non-emergency line or see if there's a fireworks reporting hotline. I would very much like to not be in the path of a wildfire.

[silentwalrus1]

Elevator Fight Scene | Captain America The Winter Soldier (2014) Movie Clip

Elevator Fight Scene | Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) Movie info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1843866/ Buy it on Blu-ray: https://www.amazon.com/...

i just rewatched this clip and honestly my characterization of steve rogers is…not…..hardcore….enough. this guy is. just. like. an honest to god assault aircraft comes at him with a machine gun and he speeds up at it. like oh yes i hope youve got a can opener because this two thousand gallon drum of whoopass is coming most directly your way. and honestly? it tracks. it tracks! in catfa he’s shown leaping onto flying hydra aircraft and just ripping the pilots out like whupty doo son this flight is now an american express!! bye bitch!! yeet!!! one pansy ass quinjet? to stop steve steel balls rogers? steven grant six foot twenty fucking invented cocaine motherfucking rogers? you have got to be out of your god damned mind

[silentwalrus1]

listen. as funny and quality as it is to have bucky be the sheepdog to steve’s rabid ram i FULLY believe that bucky barnes is on this ride because he likes the goddamn horsepower. james buchanan is here because he wants to watch his feral twink take on god and when he becomes a 300lb war ballerina barnes wants to watch him plow the devil. in costume. are ya keeping the outfit steve?? are ya?? bucky knows better than anybody how mcfreakin tough steve is and he’s not ride or die despite the fact that steve is a human chainsaw, he’s there because of it

[silentwalrus1]

STRIKE team: give it up, Rogers! You’ve got nowhere to go! 

Steve: 

[mikkeneko]

Adding a new link to the fight scene since the OP video is gone

[zachbiller]

[ruffboi-mags]

I was gonna say “what you think he had insurance???” but 1) at least in the early aughts to mid-teens, NY was one of the less excruciating states to get medicaid in, and 2) he was a minor and it’s a LOT easier to get medicaid for a minor, especially when said minor’s legal guardians are retirees on fixed incomes I’d wager.

So yeah they’re all just fuckin dumbasses! I love them.

[absolxguardian]

This is why I think it would be peak comedy for the radioactive spider to be of a non-venomous species and for there to be a scene of a new Peter Parker/Spiderperson looking up the spider’s features or posting a photo to an identification subbredit before being informed of the fact that nothing will happen

[ruffboi-mags]

entemologist reddit: oh yeah, that one’s venom isn’t strong enough to cause anything other than a bit of localized pain at the bite site, no worries.

Peter Parker the next morning, stuck to his ceiling: Well someone fucking LIED!!!!

[britcision]

Peter Parker typing out an angry internet rant to send back to the entomologist about “this is fucking bullshit I feel like ass I walked into six walls and I’m sweating fucking GLUE”

People keep asking him for updates and he does two more before deciding to become a superhero and deleting his reddit account

Six weeks later someone else posts about how “so that one spider bite guy. The one who kept. Sticking to walls. And this, uh. New hero guy. Climbing walls. Spiderman. Connected?”

[hockeylvr42]

Out of all the cool stuff that mythbusters ever shot on high speed camera, shooting a soccer ball at 60mph out of a truck traveling 60mph is one of my favorites

Just look at it. It is the most perfect visual representation of Newton’s 2nd law of physics I’ve ever seen. The ball, which was shot out of a CANNON, drops straight down. Two equal and opposite velocities completely canceling each other out, leaving the soccer ball to drop to the earth with a net velocity of 0. Sir issac newton would be proud to tears of this gif.

And yet this “myth” is nothing more than basic physics at work. A 10 year old with an interest in science could have told us this is possible. 60mph in one direction minus 60mph the exact opposite direction is 0. Basic.

But what makes this so frieken cool is the fact that they went through all the trouble to actually demonstrate the invisible laws that govern the way our universe works. To get this shot both the soccer ball and the truck had to be moving at the exact same speed. Real world variables make that extremely difficult to pull off. It took them hundreds of attempts to get it right. They went through all that trouble to “prove” something we have known as fact for hundreds of years. And we get this amazing gif to watch as a result.

Mythbusters is incredible. Science is incredible. And the fact that this experiment in physics can be used in science classes for years and years to come to help children learn about physics is incredible.

[genderkoolaid]

tumblr puritans have never spoken to a kinky person and you can tell this because they talk about ~scary~ kinks like a child who thinks their teacher sleeps at school. they have a 1700s "actors cannot be trusted for they engage in obscene behavior" mindset. yes lil buddy people can in fact roleplay situations and then exit that roleplay and have different thoughts and actions 🤗 adding sex to performance does not actually cast a magic spell that turns you into a monster incapable of morality <3

[ashgunnywolf]

Kink is just LARP that makes you cum.

...Hear me out.

If I say "Nooooo don't kill me!!!" while LARPing, my friend is still gonna whack me on the head with their foam battle axe bc that's what I want them to do. If I actually didn't want to get hit on the head, I'd say "WHOA WHOA WHOA TIME OUT TIME OUT" so they'd know I'm serious.

In the same way, if I say "Nooooo don't spank me!!!" and my partner still spanks me, THAT'S FINE. I want to get spanked, and I'm just playing along. It would only be a real problem if I were to say the agreed-upon safe word, the word that actually means no, and still get spanked.

See? LARP that makes you cum.

[genderkoolaid]

& to add on to that:

Your friend enjoying pretending to kill you in a safe and consensual enviroment where they know you are also having a good time does not mean they actually want to axe murder people.

And in the same way, your partner enjoying safely spanking you in a safe and consensual enviroment where they know you are also having a good time does not mean they actually want to beat you up

[renastarsong]

"Killing" someone in a LARP is fine because they aren't actually dead and the battle axe was made of foam, and everyone agreed to be there. KILLING someone with an actually axe is a crime because they are actually dead. Smacking a random passerby with your foam battle axe is very rude at best and potentially low key assault at worst because they did not sign up for that.

Spanking someone during kinky fun times is fine because they know it is coming and are into it. Very into it, probably. Everyone knows what is going on and the rules. Part of the GOAL is to make sure no one is harmed. "But people end up with bruises/cuts!" My friend. I walked into my own door frame this morning and am going to have a wicked bruise from that, which is a significantly less fun way than what these people are up to, I promise. Also, bruises heal. Deeeep breaths.

[snivy]

literally everything is unisex if u stop giving a fuck

[kyrianne]

When I worked at Target, it was during the winter, and this guy comes up to my register with a neutral-colored beanie with a fake fur pompom on top. All embarrassed and cringing, asking me if it was a woman’s hat and if it would be weird for him to get it.

I was like, “It’s just a hat. If you like it and you wear it, it’s not a woman’s hat, it’s just your hat. You don’t need to follow what the tag says if you don’t want to.” And it was like I gave him some kind of awe-inspiring wisdom he’d never considered, and he left with that hat on his head.

More cishets need to hear and internalize this message because so many of them are avoiding things that would make them happy just because of it having a label on it for whatever gender.

[olderthannetfic]

Every year… Every damn year…

[fighterkimburgess]

Tags like this are the reason I tend to donate extra to AO3 when I can afford to.

[olderthannetfic]

Honestly, I don’t even care if people I know donate. AO3 is designed so that a few generous patrons can make a nice thing exist for everyone… But holy shit do I wish tumblr would learn how websites and companies work because it is important to know what motivates them.

On AO3, MORE TRAFFIC IS NOT BETTER HOLYFUCK. That’s only true when traffic = more ad revenue or a better pitch to venture capitalists or something.

[azcrowleyfell]

Ao3 is literally a nonprofit, kids.

[roach-works]

to clarify, rather than scold: The Archive Of Our Own is a nonprofit organization that runs an archive of fanfiction, specifically for the purposes of recording and maintaining all fanfics uploaded to it. it was founded after livejournal and fanfiction.net repeatedly deleted queer and ‘problematic’ fanfics in order to please advertisers and keep getting ad revenue. for decades, fandom was at the mercy of corporations who repeatedly deleted–with little warning and no mercy–whatever platforms were used to host fanfiction, especially dark, queer, kinky, and immoral fanfiction that would annoy corporate interests or scare off investors or offend advertisers.

AO3 is specifically relies on donations, rather than ad revenue, because it is the Archive Of Our Own, and is not answerable to any political agenda other than protecting and maintaining, again, all the fanfiction uploaded to it. there are checks and balances, and there’s a governing board, and they’re all dead serious about making sure that the archive endures any attempts by outside parties to censor or remove its content, no matter how abhorrent that content is.

the archive is an archive, not a social network or a platform. it hosts content and it serves that content to users in an efficient way–hence the phenomenal tag system–but it is meant to safeguard writers and their writing, not to profit from its users. it literally can’t profit off of its users or monetize their interactions in any way, just by virtue of its own structure: all money given to a nonprofit goes towards furthering that organization’s mission.

see, when a company or corporation makes money, it pays for labor and upkeep and then the guys that own the company keep the rest of the money, and that’s profit. when a nonprofit makes money, it pays for labor and upkeep and then if it has extra, it reinvests in various ways, like building new things or improving old things, or it saves the money for future labor and upkeep it might need.

the archive cares that users are able to control their own experiences of it, and filter out the stuff they don’t want to see. they care that users are protected from harassment. but they don’t profit from users’ engagement with the site, so they don’t do anything to encourage traffic the way a for-profit site that’s monetized engagement has.

hopefully this explanation helps someone.

tl;dr, a non-profit archive can’t profit from traffic the way for-profit social networks do, so it doesn’t care about you in a completely different way.

[wodneswynn-deactivated-deactiva]

Concept: You walk outside one night and notice that there are two full moons. A few hours go by and they don’t seem to move.

You stare up at them.

They blink.

[kainoliero]

You blink back. It’s only polite to return the greeting of the Big Night Cat.

[wodneswynn-deactivated-deactiva]

I meant for this to be all spooky and ominous, but fuck it, this is way better. I love the Big Night Cat. She is beautiful. I support her.

[midnightmart]

hand slipped so heres a gif

[shitpostsorcerer]

Reblog to respect the Big Night Cat

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

"The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I'm not a trannie or a fag so I don't care, just give 'em the medicine they need."

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

[june-egbert-official]

Someone who says they don't care if dudes wear dresses and makeup is a better ally than someone who says they're a safe space for women and non-binary people. I am not joking.

[redrook]

yeah I went to a gay bar recently with my husband tumblr user beemovieerotica, and a VERY confused capital S Southerner straight man in cargo shorts and a trucker hat showed up

apparently he (who through my drunken memory I remember only as Earl) liked some woman, and she told him that he wasn't cultured enough and needed to attend his first drag show (she also flaked on him)

Now I'm reasonably androgynous and was wearing makeup, a short leather skirt, and black heeled boots, but still when this guy came up to me when I was standing off alone and asked "So. Do you come here often?" with a very earnest expression, I thought. Surely not. This guy doesn't think I'm a straight woman does he????

Anyway I start talking with this guy and he has no idea what the fuck is going on but he is just a very kind and earnest dude and asked a lot of questions (while asking if it was alright if he asked those questions). I track down my husband and friends and I'm like y'all. We need to make sure that Earl has a Good Fucking Time tonight.

Man was completely out of his depth. At one point they put on a puppy auction to raise money for Pride, that started with a 6 ft drag queen in all her glory leading a leather pup out on a leash to the tune of that damned RSPCA "in the arms of the angels" song

We look at Earl. Nervous. He squints, laughs, and then goes "I was wondering why people were dressed like that!" He turned to me and asked "So they're like dogs?" And I said yeah pretty much. And he just chuckled and went "Yeah I thought so with the tails! Never seen this before!"

When the first drag king came out, Earl looked at me wide eyed and went "There's a dude version too?!" And I said yeah they're called drag kings. And he said, low, "Drag kings."

During one of the queens performances, he frowned, shook his head and told me, "Your legs are better than hers." in a tone that implied he thought there was some travesty taking place and I should also be getting paid

When he found out I was there with my husband (and that I am not a woman) he profusely apologized and said "I'm so sorry, it's dark in here and I thought you were a hot chick! I wouldn't have said nothing if I knew you had a husband, I'm so sorry about that."

When beemovie invited me to the dance floor with him later and I still had a drink in my hand, Earl said "Oh don't worry about that I can hold your drink, you get on out there and shake your ass with your husband!" Then before we left, Earl bought me drinks for "Putting up with me all night and answering everything. Y'all helped me have a great time tonight."

like. You gotta recognize there's going to people who have never had interacted outside of their of their own community. This includes you. And just because your community is familiar with all the right vocabulary and how to correctly say something, it doesn't mean they're actually going to support you. If someone like Earl shows up, confused and out of their depth but kind and curious and earnest, you gotta have patience and truck through the small things, so when he goes back to his friends and his coworkers and they snicker asking how the drag show was, he can genuinely talk about how included we tried to make him feel and that he had a great time

The person matters more than the language

[little-trash-ghost]

I will reblog this EVERY TIME.

Sanitized language is a tool of oppression, always has been and always will be.

And yes, I get being pissed off by slurs. I do. But in the times we are living in right now, we really need to all pivot our priorities to safety.

"Earl" will talk to all his Busch drinking, tractor-pulling, gun toting, conservative voting friends about the nice and friendly and harmless trannies he met, and they will understand him.

They do not know what gender non-conforming, trans-femme/masc, demiboy, agender genderqueer bisexual lesbians are, and quite frankly, they do not need to.

What we need from Earl and his friends is for them to feel neutrally enough about us to not become violent with us, and to spread the idea that violence against us is not necessary or warranted. They are simply not going to do that in a language that is not their own.