Huh?!

Chris 24 he/him, spends all time writing, working, and/or wanting to die. bi (racial/sexual/polar)

[grink]

theres something happening on instagram reels

[grink]

ive spent the last half hour crying because of this

[grink]

my bebder game ☺️

[this-site-isnt-safe-for-me]

the best fucking shirt

[dorothylarouge]

[dogpuppy]

[themainspoon]

[cannolipony]

[elliespectacular]

driver's ed is trying to be more hip and relatable to the youth so they started adorning those horrifying photos of mutilated corpses in car wreckage with image macro text saying things like "BRO THOUGHT HE HAD THE RIGHT OF WAY 😆💀😭"

[deathmybride]

[biteybeast]

cats when they see a bird

[little-bender-things-blog]

[catboybiologist]

sorry i told u to kill yourself the other day, i was like crazy horny and not thinking straight

Understandable girlboss let's channel that energy into getting laid next time

[catboybiologist]

Only valid character tag here post everyone else pack it up

[wrightandco]

the confetti for a not guilty verdict is actually the funniest fucking thing about ace attorney

it’s like they inherently know their system is fucked to the to the extent that they’ve got the celebration confetti at the ready when they don’t wrongfully incarcerate someone

edgeworth never lost a trial until he faced phoenix wright so the confetti goes off and he’s probably like what the fuck ppfthh pffth phhh that last bit is him spitting the confetti out of his mouth

[duskittycat]

edgeworth, losing a trial for the first time:

[herachimera]

[rats420]

i discovered that you can make chuck norris memes infinitely funnier by cropping out the bottom caption

[rats420]

[kozlarz]

[qqchurch]

the Ice War on Europa...

[qqchurch]

[deep-state-partisan]

[somestrangeangels]

[i-am-venomancer]

This is the best RP

[beardedmrbean]

[disgruntled-foreign-patriarch]

Dude was trying to self-domesticate again

[uncle-beanbag-mojave]

[thisisdaddyspage]

Show daddy that nice picture again

[filthinfatuated]

[borzoibabe]

did you know?

- the menu at a restaurant is not an ingredient list you can use to create new dishes we could hypothetically make for you instead of the choices on the menu

- we do not have omelets on the menu because we do not make or serve omelets

- yes, i know we have eggs on the menu, but we still do not have omelets.

- yes, i realize omelets are eggs, but not all eggs are omelets, and the eggs we serve are not omelets.

- you cannot out-logic me so that i cave in and ring in an omelet for you. i am better at arguing than you are.

- there are no omelets here. there have not been, and will not be, omelets here. if you want an omelet you will need to go somewhere else.

- i can also promise that you do not want an omelet cooked by line cooks who have not been trained how to make omelets. because we don't sell omelets.

- no, i am not going to single-handedly put service on pause for the next twenty minutes while three cooks google how to make an omelet and then proceed to fuck up multiple omelets that our kitchen is not set up to prepare, so you can have an omelet.

-and we both know you'd bitch if it takes longer than six minutes to come out anyway.

- no, you may not just go back into the kitchen and make yourself an omelet. the line cooks do not take kindly to trespassing. also, what the hell.

- i hear that you want an omelet. that does not change the fact that we do not offer omelets. if you want to eat an omelet, you will need to go to another restaurant that does have omelets on the menu. this is not negotiable.

- i am the manager.

- yeah, alright, go fuck yourself too, bob.

[borzoibabe]

literally today a woman came in to the restaurant i work at, looked at the menu, looked around at all the tables eating, watched us take orders, watched us run food out to table. and then she approached me and asked "is this a restaurant?"

i thought for sure i misheard her, but no. she was asking "is this a restaurant?", almost as if maybe she had heard of the concept of restaurants but had never experienced one for herself, and she needed to get confirmation from somebody else.

i could not control my face. i had to walk away and another coworker had to step in to kindly explain that yes, the restaurant is a restaurant.

i would never lie to you.

[halondrus]

[solomeo333]

Happy burger you can fuck friday

[halondrus]

Happy burger you can fuck friday

[guantanamo-bae]

Wecome to the Krusty towers