Local fictionkin

Fictionkin sideblog, I am not very active online as I have a life outside of social medias, and I have very little free time because of uni.

[restless-moons]

• Little account introduction :

(This will be updated as I find more information to give about myself. As for now, please bear with this messy and incomplete introduction.)

I’ve been wanting to share a bit of my experiences as a fictionkin, but I didn’t really feel comfortable doing it on my main blog, so I created this sideblog just for that.

Keeping my identities for myself only is hard as they are a big part of me, and I believe just being able to even remotely exteriorize some thoughts and feelings on this blog might help feel less alone, and make more sense of who I am.

Personal information :

I go by multiple names online as well as irl, but you can call me Nate/Nath/Levi or any of my kins’ names, and I’ll do the same myself.

I’m an 19 years old fictionkin, as well as otherkin and therian, but that part is not really relevant to this blog. I mostly use he/they/it pronouns, and am very open to interactions with sourcemates, even though I might be quite reserved.

My fictionkins list is the following :

(listed in medias’ alphabetical order)

Nagisa Shiota (Assassination Classroom) 🐙

Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan) ⚔️

Ellana Caldin (Ellana) 🌳

Vanilla Periwinkle (Fairy Oak) 🌼

Wanderer (Genshin Impact) 💫

Kazemaru Ichirota/Nathan Swift (Inazuma Eleven) ⚽️

Andrew Graves (The Coffin of Andy and Leyley) 🪦

Jayfeather (Warriors Cats) 🪶

Whiteout (Wings of Fire) ❄️

This list is very probably incomplete as I am still exploring sides of my identity(ies), and kinsidering other potential fictionkins. I do not wish to write them here, however, as I prefer to keep them to myself as long as I am not sure if I am kin with them of not.

Beliefs :

I believe in the multiverse theory, and that my current body is another version of who I am in those universe, and I just by chance happened to remember and identify to those other versions of myself. This is again a very messy and severe details lacking explanation, but I do not currently find better words to describe my experience.

Reality checks do not work on me. I am very aware of how I am supposed to present irl and who I am, and I would be more amused than anything else if random people were to try to hurt me that way.

DNI :

-13yo (if you are less than 15 years old please do not privately contact me, I do not mind interactions but I do not feel comfortable talking with people much younger than I am.), homophobes, transphobes, zoophiles, pedos, anti-therians/otherkin/alterhumans, anti-agere/petre, zionists, neo-nazis, racists, MAGAs, ableists, RCTA, anti-neopronouns, radqueers, factkins, pro-lifers, uneducated people who think they can spew their bullshit without consequences.

[restless-moons]

I genuinely love the fact that I got a tattoo representing my identity as Levi. I’m me, I have a proof of it on my body that will always be there, that will always be a proof of what I lived and who I grew up to be.

“Oh but Levi what will happen when you end up regretting it or stop identifying as yourself ?” I won’t ? Simple as that ?

Even if I ever lose my memories, my identity, my connection to who I am, it will always be dear to me to have what I lived for, what I life for, somewhere displayed proudly for the world to see. Because I am proud of who I am, I am proud to have fought for freedom. I am proud to have the Wings of Freedom on my body, and you can’t take that away from me.

• ⚔️

[restless-moons]

Hello again, Levi. — E.S

Hello, Erwin. I am not wrong to assume it is you, am I ? It has been a long while since I last got to talk to you. Have you been doing alright, since last time ?

I have been able to find Hange here, a few days ago (or, well, they’re the one who found me), funny to hear from you both in such a short time frame.

If you want to talk to me, don’t hesitate to send another ask or a dm.

[theworldrevolvving]

BEING FICTIONKIN IS JUST REVERSE ISEKAI SEND POST

[coldest-forest]

how it feels being fictionfolk and looking at other peoples art/headcanons/fanfiction sometimes (a lot of the time)

[restless-moons]

Lmao that’s me with all those Levi fangirls’ headcanons about “his” sexual life and how he’s like in bed and all that.

Like no I am not like that ? No I wouldn’t do that ? I didn’t want to even think about sexual stuff back then and still don’t, thank you very much.

[tboy-cock]

the weird thing about being a leftist is the government calling you a radical extremist and your family believing that youre a radical extremist and the whole times your main political beliefs are shit like "we live in a world where we could very easily end world hunger, homelessness, most disease, poverty, ect. and the people in power are choosing not to, and thats evil and should change" and that bigotry is bad

[p1nkiek1ttie]

no, actually, i can’t be friends with someone who has opposing political views. this is mostly due to the fact my views are “people deserve rights”

[woodwool]

imagine if you hired a painter to paint your house and you tell them you want it blue and then you come back to see theyre in the middle of painting your house pink so you go hey stop. thats not what i asked for. and theyre like i just dont want to ruin your lovely house this color suits it so much better trust me. and you go No, i asked for blue give me blue??? and the painter is like alright alright. and then they paint your house purple and when you go this still isnt blue they say i simply cant paint your house blue. this is the compromise. and then you still have to pay them for their work even though you are now going to have to either hire another painter or just figure out how to paint ur own house to get it how you actually wanted. thatd be crazy right. so anyway i prefer to cut my own hair at home

[restless-moons]

I think we should normalize not being similar to out kins in any ways there is. I don’t look like any of my fictionkin identities. I don’t necessarily want to look like any of them. I am a mix of them, but more than that, this body has its own past. In this life, I have memories, friends, a situation that is completely separated from my other identities. And I don’t think it should be erased for the sake of being a copy of a kin. Obviously, it gives euphoria to sometimes look like them or be compared to them, but it is not necessary to want to look and behave 100% like one of them 24/7.

First, I have multiple fictionkin identities. All of them are more or less influent and “here” depending on the time of the day or the period of the year, so how would I chose which one to change my appearance for ? There isn’t one in particular who is necessarily more “there” than the others. Those are my identities. All of them are.

Secondly, even if I am quite similar to all of my different identities in term of personality, I can not be the exact same as one of them. You can not put Vanilla Periwinkle, Wanderer and Nagisa Shiota in the same body and possibly think “mmh yes the mix of those will obviously be the exact copy of only one of them, even if all of them are very different”. No. That’s not how it works.

Of course, it hurts to be a character and people around you not seeing how they are you. It feels invalidating. It hurts. Personally, I even start to doubt my own memories and feelings in the worst of it. But at the same time, it is understandable. The mix of all of my personalities, contained in this body which has an identity of its own, will sometimes be more similar to others than to myself.

As an example, I am Wanderer, from Genshin Impact. There is no doubt about it in my mind. He is me, I am him, all the shit around that. Yet, my friends never associated him with me at first glance. They see me more in Xingqiu or Kaedehara Kazuha. And yes, it makes sense. They are not aware that I am Wanderer. And as of now, who I am and the image people have of me is indeed closer to those characters than to myself.

I shouldn’t have to change my ways just to act more like one character when it isn’t natural to me. If I changed just to be recognized as Wanderer, I would get what I want, but I would be erasing everything else that makes me.

Even if the mix of all the identities I have is someone unlike any of my actual identities, at least it’s me, at least I see all of them in who I am, and I am not erasing them for the sake of validation for just one identity. I won’t always talk like Wanderer, because the youth of Vanilla will always be in the back when I chose my words, because the poetry of Ellana or the dreamy phrasing of Whiteout will always have an influence on the way I form sentences. And seeing all of me like that validates me way more than if I ever chose to shut some of my identities down for the sake of promoting only one of them for validation.

[restless-moons]

No one I know irl knows I’m Levi Ackerman. I am not even sure I ever told my only friend who’s aware of my alterhuman identity. Basically, no one I know knows who I truly am.

Yet, they all know about my attachment to my source, to my world. I do not talk often about myself or about my source because I would despise more than anything seeming like one of those fangirls of the “character” I am. The idea of ever being mischaracterized like that highly irritates me.

I have exactly one tattoo. I see those things as something to think about for years before getting them, to be sure I really want it. So I guess it makes that sole tattoo on my body really symbolic, even though no one who knows about it knows how important it is to me.

Having the Wings of Freedom tattooed on my back represents so much more than just belonging to some fandom, it represents the ideals I’ve lived by since before I even joined the Survey Corps, in that other life I miss as much as I hated. It represents who I am deep inside, and no one will ever be able to take that away, just as the ink will always stay under my skin, there as a reminder of what I lived for, what my comrades died for.

• ⚔️

[signofthesignless]

puts hand on your shoulder. do not let anyone try to fakeclaim you for "not acting like your kintype." do not feel pressured into acting like your kintype. it doesn't make you any less you for having a different personality, different interests, etc. i couldn't give a damn if you have nothing in common with your kintypes. that's you. anyone who gives you shit because you're "don't act like [kintype] enough" sucks! the requirement for being fictionkind/otherkind is to be that thing. that's it. there is no requirement that says "you have to act like your kintype every second of the day or else ur faking" or "you have to change ur entire personality" or "you have to pick up similar hobbies" etc. like there is no required experience for being fictionkind/otherkind other than simply being your kintype. what "being your kintype" means can differ from person to person. do not feel guilty because you do not feel enough like your kintype in others eyes. surround yourself with the right people and they will see you for who you are regardless.

[restless-moons]

I find it quite ironic how my birthday is the same day as Christmas. I don’t really celebrate it as such nowadays, it has become quite futile and I never felt the need to actually do some sort of special celebration for it.

But even if I’m not sharing it with anyone, there’s some moments when, as I’m unwrapping some gifts from my family, I like to pretend those gifts are actually birthday gifts. I don’t even know if I would have celebrated my birthday if I had known when it was, in the past. But it feels precious to have this for me, now.

• ⚔️

[restless-moons]

It feels so weird to know when I was born. Like, I never learned about it in my former life. I never celebrated my birthday, not that people did that much anyway. But there’s a difference between not celebrating it because we just don’t do that and not celebrating it because you don’t know when it is.

I didn’t have a last name until quite late in my life. I didn’t have any family. I didn’t have a birthday. I only had my name, my convictions and my abilities for a long time, and those were my most prized possessions. It didn’t matter if they were not material. I didn’t have anything else.

It’s true that I didn’t learn about my birthday before coming back as a new person in this life. It shouldn’t impact me anymore, I outgrew the need for a birthday long ago. Yet, I feel strangely attached to this date. Knowing the day I was born, as futile as this information can be, brought me some kind of closure. It is another part of my history I never got to learn about during my first lifetime. Another thing to call mine.

• ⚔️

[restless-moons]

Happy birthday to me I guess.

• ⚔️

[restless-moons]

I miss my friend :(

I remember having a wingless dragon as my closest friend, I don’t recall much about them really, but I have those warm memories of them jumping around in a somewhat feline way as I would fly close to the ground behind them

I think they were smaller than me, too ? Smaller than all known breeds of dragons we’ve seen in the books, which is…a bit troubling ? Does that mean that my friend’s species went extinct after our time ? And what was said time ? I can feel in my core that it was centuries, if not millennia, before my life as Whiteout, but this is quite vague as a timeline

Anyway yes I want my friend back

[restless-moons]

For a long time, I knew I was a character from Genshin Impact. I felt this connection to the universe, to some of the characters, I had vivid memories of the lands I’ve seen and a deep sense of melancholy whenever I played the game. Yet, I didn’t want to dwell too much in those feelings. Especially as I was not familiar yet with the concept of fictionkinity, and felt quite insane in my thoughts.

The only thing was that I was not quite sure of whom I was. Yes, I had a few ideas. But that was it. It is only during the event of Simulanka, with the introduction of Durin, that I started getting a clearer idea, that painful clenching in my chest making itself known once again. I knew him. I knew that little dragon like it was family. It made me think once again about my own identity.

I always had a particular attachment to Albedo. He felt familiar, safe, I knew him and his life even before knowing more about the character. And for some time, I wondered if perhaps he could be who I was looking for, he could be who I was. But still, something felt a bit wrong about it. But I didn’t really have a better hint, so for a little while I settled with that.

It’s when I started to wonder if I could be from a canon different from my real source. Ironically, it is a fanfiction i fell upon by pure chance a few years ago that got me on the right track. Or well, it helped me look further into it once I started seriously questioning myself.

Then the “Wanderer” came out. And yes, indeed, I would end up figuring out my identity as the one called “Wanderer” by the fandom quite a while afterwards. I do not like to talk about “him” as a separate entity from me. I am him. He is me. So I’ll continue to talk about the “Wanderer” as myself from now on.

I am indeed canon divergent. I do not call myself by some human appellation. I do not see the point of it. The only name I like to go by is my spouse’s last name. What purpose does a first name serve if a last name fits perfectly enough to convey my identity ? In my reality, I am known by other researchers as Sir Kreideprinz, and it suits me completely. Plus, if I gave them a first name to call me by, they might think it alright to call me by it only and entertain an illusion of closeness, or Archons forbid, of friendship. No. Only my spouse has the right to see himself as important to me, with perhaps the exception of that little brat of Durin and Lady Nahida. I guess that makes them…somewhat similar to a family. I don’t know.

• Wanderer 💫

[restless-moons]

I have just kinfirmed a character the fastest I have ever done

Like

In probably less than an hour ?

I randomly decided to read again a book I hadn’t touched since primary school (to say the least, it has been A GOOD WHILE)

And it brought back so much memories, but not in the way “I had no memories of it originally”, just memories from that life I had but did not remember where they came from

And it makes so much more sense for lots of reasons, already back then I knew that I was that character in some capacity, and now I know what a fictionkin is I can accept the knowledge of that identity back into my life

It feels like I’m reconnecting with a part of me that was always there but hidden behind an endless wall, and it feels so warm and welcoming and it almost brought tears to my eyes because of how familiar it felt !

Anyway hi, I finally remembered that I’m Vanilla Periwinkle 🌼