Send. Help.

My favorite Kardashian is Scott Disick.

[i-merani]

[json-derulo]

messages from Home Alone (1990) that haven’t aged well:

forgive your family for treating you poorly because they’re ✨family✨ 🥺 what would you ever do without them?

groceries are $19.83

messages from Home Alone (1990) that HAVE aged well:

don’t trust cops

befriend old man with shovel

[fairestforest]

[fairestforest]

[mysharona1987]

[freekentuckythinker]

[enbypalsidk]

a house divided will never stand

[yelyahrodrigo]

Six times Xaden Riorson is the funniest character in Fourth Wing

♡ because my boy contains multitudes ♡

1. when he was trolling Vi right from the beginning

2. when he was fucking done with Tynan's shit

"nO, bUt I cAn NaRrAtE" lives rent free in my head

3. when he manages to lighten the mood right before making out with Violet for the first time

4. when he cannot contain his giddiness that he can now bother Violet without having to utter a single word

5. when he decides honesty in the best policy with Mira

6. when he is offended by breakfast

✰ Xaden Riorson, born to be a little shit, forced to be a revolution leader ✰

[celestialvioletsoul]

Here's your The Empyrean reminder that Andarna chose her scorpiontail so that she could protect Violet after witnessing her human almost got killed by a poison in Fourth Wing.

Here's also to remind you that Violet's second signet emerged because she wanted to reach Andarna during her dreamless sleep in Iron Flame. These precious beings. I love them so much. 🥺

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

quiz: why do lobsters have one claw bigger

[goth-princess-gwennie]

They evolved to handle different prey. the larger crusher claw cracks open ahrder prey like a molar tooth, whilst the smaller pincer claw rips apart soft prey similar to an incisor tooth.

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

theyre lobsided

[goth-princess-gwennie]

oh I see! yay!

[minnow-doodle-doo]

kinda going through it rn

[flagellant]

we can't be mountains all the time sometimes we need to be small enough to be held in both hands also

[iamnotlanuk]

[melchiordommik]

Concentration camp.

They built a concentration camp.

I don't think words can describe what this other than genocide.

[sapropel]

Israeli whistleblowers detail horror of shadowy detention facility for Palestinians | CNN

At a military base that now doubles as a detention center in Israel’s Negev desert, an Israeli working at the facility snapped two photograp

[fagcrisis]

[cannibalcaprine-deactivated2024]

the comic (#1890)

[animentality]

[richbrittstein]

I have actual tears coming down my face right now

[asterosian]

Every time I like or reblog a post, I leave a little bit of man residue on it

Every time I reply or add commentary to a reblog, that’s five times as much man residue

Me following your blog means your whole blog has man residue

I’m spreading it everywhere

[asterosian]

@jaekaeyay here ya go

[elisamaza]

oh my fucking god. she’s unironically saying men have cooties

[asterosian]

Now that this has blown up, I want everyone reblogging it to know their blog has man residue on it

Reblog to get man residue on your blog

[asterosian]

This post made it onto Reddit and then a YouTube video which means I’ve exposed multiple websites to my man residue

[thetraumatrain]

Fuck gold star lesbianism and here’s my man residue

[richbrittstein]

Wait

[hazeldomain]

Poll: if your mom remarries when you’re 26 years old is that guy still your stepdad or is he just your mom’s husband.

[hazeldomain]

The poll winner seems to be “depends on whether you like him” which is super valid.

Mine watches fox news so “mom’s husband” it is!

[brainsforbabyjesus]

My family has a great way of distinguishing between a new spouse you like and new spouse you disdain!

Your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are actually a cool person, you use their first name. So if you were to introduce them they would be: Aunt Jane and Bob.

If your mom/aunt/grandma/etc remarries and they are a fuckwad you introduce them as: this is Aunt Jane and her second husband. The implication being that they are very replaceable and that we’re all just waiting for her to wise up to the situation and serve you divorce papers, she did it once, she can do it again.

[hazeldomain]

MAGNIFICENT

[readysetyeet]

Alright, but what if my mom on her third marriage found a decent man, but my mother herself is shitty

[devilboyblues]

"my stepdad's wife"

[helepikolik]

@sapphic-sargent your tags omg

You are doing God’s work

[hunterschafer]

#if smoking bad why sexy when he does it?

[ethelcainlovebot]

- Frank Herbert, Dune Messiah