Blue Rose Butterfly

A medical student who should obviously be studying writing books and fics that I don't publish cuz they're not presentable Reads on AO3, Wattpad, CG, WEBNovel,etc most times a very strict shipper Love Danmei (crispy ducks) Draws but not really, crochets but not often, study but not as much as I should... kinda a sloth artist who doesn't improve my talents I have weird dreams that might share if remember (weird to the point that when I sang Anti-hero to my cousin-who knows and likes the song-she thought I was talking fr) I enter fandoms for ships, (idk if the description is allowed to be that long so I'm gonna continue until it stops me) Introverted, with no inter-cultural knowledge cuz I spent my childhood watching anime and my teen years reading fanfics, Manhua/Manhwa/Manga, BL ( I just like BL, not in/related to the LGBTQ+ community), Danmei, etc, so excuse my living under a rock awareness and poor communication skills, and Zero understanding of social cues and stuff, also my inexperience in using Tumblr (I'm an old grandma when it comes to technology and social media( with all love and respect to grandmas ofc) just enough knowledge to search for stuff to read), if so, you might think, why do I even bother and bother you, well I have finals, I need to study and arrange my shelves so that's a pretty good reason, no? I put the pro in procrastination. since I temporarily ran out of stuff to say, one last thing, I Adore P&P guess my favourite Robin (easy question ik, but think again, who is saying this, me or someone else?) might try my hands at incorrect quotes and ficlets while I'm here, but no promises

[riko0youth]

Tumblr is the only app with a good "listening device" ,many I recently was interested in happened to appear when recommending tags for me...wish TikTok would learn smth from you

[riko0youth]

The sentence "like the stars miss the sun* lives in my head rent free and comes out to say hi whenever

So anyhow , being the recluse I am I rarely pay attention to singers name when I listen to music and don't really follow them just happen to notice their name more when they appear in my playlist often

Coincidentally yesterday in a group I'm in (and online shop) someone ordered a pin with the design of "I 💜 Lana del Rey" I was like ..who is she and what does she do and lo and behold, as I was looking for ascetic wallpaper for this sentence that popped-up just now I happened upon a new discovery.

It's note worthy that I was looking for a wallpaper to order a custom phone cover with this sentence from that very same online shop, lol

[riko0youth]

I realized I made this account to journal but I haven't really journaled much cuz I used to send everything straight to what'sapp status ...well

This is more permanent to commerate my whimsies

[riko0youth]

My heart was broken by AO3, don't mind me , I still love you

But I'm gonna be heartbroken for five minutes

....and then maybe I'll get over my writer's block at an inopportune moment like always

[riko0youth]

One of the things I love most in life is cross ship FICS ,mind you I don't mean crossovers ,it's like

When a certain ship is put in the dynamic/plotline of ANOTHER ship

It's like an upgraded version of the notion of "loving to see the same pair fall in love in the same effing way" into "loving to see different pairs I love falling in love in the exact same way"

Like, Persephone and Hades AUs , Hogwarts AUs and other top grade popular stuff aside, I just adore it

Like once ,in a fic a pair of certain vigilantes had the same square dynamic of a certain pair of superheroes (my favorite corner was still,and would always be ,the same)

Or when a certain pair (with shippers enough to uphold a fandom) are portrayed as another certain pair from a certain popular old show that we could all swear are freaking canon.

There are not many examples, but when I come across them it's such a delight!!

[larryisnotagirl]

Help, I’ve been called out.

[riko0youth]

It's my 5 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

- I can't believe I have had Tumblr for five years and still donno my way around it

[bambistjames]

non-writers will never understand the mental illness of writing an entire conversation in your head while doing dishes and then forgetting every word the second you open a blank doc

[riko0youth]

TT_TT

[riko0youth]

I just watched Mr&Mrs.Smith yesterday and honestly?

I NEED AN AU FIC FOR EVERY SHIP I'VE EVER SHIPPED IN MY LIFE

I DON'T CARE IF THEY ONLY CHANGED THE NAMES AND COPY-PASTED THE ENTIRE SCRIPT OF THE MOVIE , I'LL TAKE IT!!!!!!!!

If YOU HAVE ANY RECS IN THE FOLLOWING TAGS' SHIPS PLZ SHARE

[riko0youth]

I've heard Abt the song Tumblr Girls since forever , but I only thought of listening to it now, thinking it's a song that represents our crazy fangirl energy like "I Ship It" .

It???turns out?? To be a song about One night stands??? (Or smth like that ,but absolutely not what I was looking for!)

Even tho no one really scammed me ,I fell scammed

EDIT: I stand Corrected

YouTube has some absolute gems

[teaboot]

Yeah Mr. Darcy’s proposal was a complete turd and a half but you gotta understand. You got your life together. A good career, stable income, retirement plan, all that shit together. And you meet this girl. And she’s everything. Clever, outspoken, funny, calls you on your bullshit. Grade A cutie, right? And she doesn’t go out of her way to spend time with you but she’s nice, and sometimes you catch her looking your way in a way that makes you think you might have a shot.

But her family. Holy shit.

First off, it’s p much ALL women, and mostly UNMARRIED women, which at this time means of something happens to her dad then you’re financially responsible for like. Four grown ass adults, potentially forever

Because mom in law is DEFINITELY gonna need someone to take care of her when dad in law kicks it, and they have like. NO money. So already you’re accepting that if all goes well, you’re gonna be one random old bag’s retirement home. That’s expensive and exhausting, yeah? Imagine asking someone on a first date knowing that if they say yes and things go good her high-strung chihuahua mother is gonna move in with you. IMAGINE.

And girly’s other sisters. Well, one is a sweetheart, yeah, so she probably won’t be an issue, but that still leaves three more, and two of those ones are INSUFFERABLE. Never went to school, dumb as rocks, spend cash like it’s toilet paper

And while one of the two is young still and might grow out of it the OTHER one is actively torpedo’ing her entire family’s reputation by wandering off with random dudes and chasing ass. She’s never gonna work, she can’t build connections, she’s a fucking sinkhole, and she’s being led on by the same goddamn con man ass leeching tit who’s been bleeding you dry while telling anyone who’ll listen that your family is full of ratty thieving bastards.

And if he dumps her after a week- WHICH YOU KNOW HIS BITCH ASS IS GONNA- you’ve got a SECOND UNMARRIABLE GROWN ASS ADULT TO PROVIDE FOR. And you KNOW she’s gonna be a tantrum-throwing little shit about it, and it’s not like you can lock her in the basement or something, you’re gonna have to bring her fucking. Everywhere. And give her an allowance and shit while she contributes zero, because again, she NEVER GOT EDUCATED AND HAS NO MARKETABLE SKILLS. She’s not even good to TALK to. FUCK

And you’re looking at this girl’s father like “please for the love of fuck get your spawn under control, marry them off, get them working on their résumé, learning to sew or be nursemaids or manage staff or SOMETHING, yall got no money and one foot in the grave” and that old man just laughs like “haha yeah, what can you do. lol”

So you’re looking to the mom and finally it’s making sense how she got that twitch in her eye and as MUCH as she is you’re starting to realize she’s the SMART one, desperately throwing her armloads of girls at random men like they’re a bunch of fucking lifeboats bobbing around a sinking ship, like yes Jesus Christ sweetly that life boat IS old and ugly and kind of boring but for FUCKS SAKE PICK ONE

And you look back at this girl who is ALSO REFUSING THE LIFE BOATS BY THE WAY and god damn it she’s still the most radiant thing you’ve ever seen so fine, fuck it, Christ alive, you’ll do it. You’ll shoot your shot. She’s everything you’ve ever wanted in anybody abut it’s not even just about that anymore, it’s about being her best fucking shot at a future, and even if she doesn’t like you all that much she’s still gonna say yes and that might break your heart a bit knowing it’s about the money but who knows, maybe it will at least be civil, or companionable, and even if she doesn’t LOVE you at least you’ll know she’s well and cared for

And so you’ll do it. You’ll take on the neurotic stress mess mother in law, the absent father, the broke ass wingnut no brain no money no future airhead sisters, the bad mannered relatives and the embarrassing behaviour and the impending future of sharing your entire shit with a clown parade of freeloaders, you’ll risk it all and accept the absolute certainty of financial ruin and emotional exhaustion for the rest of your whole ass life and you’ll make your own family deal with it too, you’ll do it, you’ll fucking DO IT, you stupid lovesick motherfucker

And so you go to this chick like “look. Your whole family’s a shitshow. You’ve got fucking nothing and you’re gonna die on the street. But for some reason- and I don’t get it either- I’ve fallen in love with you, and I wish I didn’t, but I did, so I’m telling you that whether you like me or not, I’ll give you everything. I’ll give you everything even if it’s the dumbest shit I ever done. Fuck my stupid Baka ass, I’ll marry you.”

And she looks at you- having heard or considered absolutely none of your months-long internal debate and monologue- and goes “The fuck did you just say about my family, you son of a bitch?”

And the shock of that is enough to jolt you back into a reality where you are able to actually hear and process what just came out of your damn mouth And yeah

Yeah, I think I kinda get it

[nika-lea34]

Yeah that’s the perfect summary

[riko0youth]

This is beautiful

[callese]

refseek.com

www.worldcat.org/

link.springer.com

http://bioline.org.br/

repec.org

science.gov

pdfdrive.com

[growing-yet-into-magic]

Worldcat is my bestie and my one true love!! Not only does it tell you what library a book is at, but it also price compares different used book sites against each other for easy view! It's how I got Tarot For the Master for $10!!

[lolatyourface69]

um and don't forget my favorite of all

www.askjeeves.com

[arkaniist]

i just finished My Husband is Suffering from a Terminal Illness and oh my goddd i've never wanted to see a book adapted into a manhua or donghua so bad in my LIFE. cunt4cunt arranged marriage transmigration story with a HE (despite the title!) and the main couple's story ends SO sweetly despite their mutual 🖕 start... the humor was great, the plot was a bit predictable/tropey but still pretty satisfying in the end, the side characters were really good (i wish there was a side couple for the nephew!), and it genuinely made me tear up a couple times... ugghh it was so good i need more ppl to know about it.

[riko0youth]

The danmei that was there for me at my lowest 👏👏👏

[rythms-of-synthax-deactivated20]

Quote of the day

[baffledtreesquid]

I’m seeing a lot of people saying this post changed their brain chemistry, and as a neuroscientist I wanted to say yes!!! Yes it does!

Wanting something requires dopamine signaling, but liking something doesn’t.

If you have a mental illness/disorder that affects dopamine, you might feel that you don’t want to do the things that you like. You do still like them. You will appreciate having done them.

Let your likes guide you.

(If you want to read more, here’s one experimental paper about it. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC5171207/ This theory called the incentive-sensitization theory was originally created to explain behaviors in addiction but can be applied elsewhere as well)

Rewards are both ‘liked’ and ‘wanted’, and those two words seem almost interchangeable. However, the brain circuitry that mediates the psych

[riko0youth]

Hold that thought 🤣

Mira's Oh moment, but not like, our italicized "oh" moment, no an actual oh moment of realization cuz for >half of the movie she has suspected and almost believed Rumi was acting weird when it comes to demons cuz of Jinu and she thinks if he got her to fall that hard that quick to distract her and get her to second-guess her strongest belief this much this quick then he most definitely fooled her and tricked her and etc etc and she was like "this suddenly idiotic lovebrain friend of mine the moment i catch u red handed i'm gonna give you a run for your money and shove a freaking grenade up that evil manipulative demon's a-" ahem, but then the next second its "Oh-OH ITS CUZ *SHE* IS A DEMON, not cuz of the overhyped handsome loser demon!" meanwhile Rujinu is purely innocently slow burning from enemies to lovers with all the right steps right off the cliff of soulmates and I-🤣🤣🤣

[riko0youth]

.....

1 h into tumblr and my already faulty-fsr-these-days cognition is failing me , this was already getting worrisome , i sould think again abt checking it in the hospital

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

Just third degree yearns for all my fictional husbands.